Son Turned Daughter
by Chaos Orchid
Summary: Not wanting to lie to the only friend he had in a very long time, Ranma tells Akane about his curse after their first sparring session. From there on out, things just seem to snowball out in odd directions...
1. Chapter 3 When a Girl, Be Like a Girl

An unusual disclaimer: Ranma ½ is a trademark of Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ Communications, and its characters have been borrowed without permission. And **Son Turned Daughter was originally written in 2002 by the FanFiction author Tangent** , and his characters Megumi, Yasushi and Ayane have, likewise, been borrowed without permission. **Please see the first two chapters under** _ **his**_ **pen name.** This story is written for non-commercial purposes only.

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Tangent wrote that he gave up on his story (in 2004) because of the angst that was developing around it. I am getting through that. Things take a brighter turn eventually. (Skip to the chapter, _Courting Ranma_ and see.)

For those who disagree about how characters from Tangent's chapters are treated, go to the explanation at the bottom of this chapter.

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Ranma buried her red, wet face in the shoulder of Miss Niouriki, the girls' gym teacher, as the girls changed back into their school uniforms. There were no more teasing, nor comments like before when the little redhead 'raised as a boy' was embarrassed at seeing girls undressing in the locker room for the first time in 'her' life. There was very little talk at all. There was little but the whispered comforting words as the woman hugged the poor girl. Ranma heard the echo of her heartbeat behind another pair of breasts, albeit, ones in a bra.

When Yasushi returned with Ranma's Chinese clothes from the bushes they had been hidden under, those girls who hadn't left knew it was time to do go. Miss Niouriki gently pried the small girl from her. She gave her over to Akane Tendo and left as well.

Ranma couldn't look Akane in the face. "Some man among men I am. Pop is right. Girls are weak." Akane looked at the twisted locker door and the cracked and fist-sized holes in the floor and cinder-block walls her upset friend had made. "I never cry!"

"Men cry! My dad does. _All_ the time!" Admittedly, it wasn't something she was proud of.

"And I've never done nothin' like this!" Ranma said, sweeping a hand at the damage. "A martial artist has to stay in control or not just things, but people can be damaged - Killed!"

Akane nodded, embarrassed that she hadn't shown the restraint the Code demanded of her. "Here. Get dressed. We're going..." and inspiration struck, "to see a doctor!"

"I ain't hurt." Physically.

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It was a long journey away from school. Akane had to prompt her friend to move, and half-support her. A few times Ranma tried to pull away from her and take her hand away from her hourglass waist. But in the end, she had to lean towards her again and accept the lower hug.

It had been several minutes of this by the time they reached, what the signs said was, a clinic specializing in moxibustion/chiropractic care.

"Dr. Tofu, it's me, Akane! Are you free? I have a patient for you. It's not me, this time!"

"Mrs. Otonashi, you don't have to leave!"

"I won't feel comfortable with her here! You-know-who may visit!" and the old lady in a kimono came into and out of the waiting room.

Ranma saw a tall, fit-looking man in a brown martial-arts gi and glasses come out to greet them. "Akane! And who is this young woman with you?"

Ranma teared up and cried, "I ain't a woman!"

Akane gathered her up in her arms, and said, "Can we talk somewhere more private?"

"How private?" the man smiled as he showed them towards an examining room.

They ended up in the empty infirmary upstairs.

"I ain't a woman!" Ranma insisted again. But her energy left her as she mumbled, "I ain't a man, either."

"Prepare yourself, Dr. Tofu," Akane told him. She had his teakettle, but, first, explained that there were these Cursed Springs of Jusenkyo that-

"Oh, so, Ranma is cursed. And judging by the teakettle..." he took it from Akane, "this is not her true form."

A doctor of excellent bedside manner did not let any surprise show when the petite yet buxom redhead was replaced by a taller, muscular brunette. "Glad to meet you, Ranma-kun." His smile seemed genuine and welcoming.

" _Man!_ " Ranma-kun growled, wiping the tears from his face. "As if I didn't hate bein' a girl before! Girls are emotional! Forget their physical strength, that's their weak spot!"

Without looking at Akane. Dr. Tofu held up his hand towards her. He was sure she was ready to violently disagree. "Girls at your age, and other times, have to deal with surges of hormones. And while both women and men have the same hormones, the brains of the female are affected differently by them. And, you, Ranma, have a female brain when you have a female body."

The still red-eyed male Ranma could actually understand that. He could treat it as tactical information on his opponent, in this case, the girl he was forced to deal with. "That explains why I do some stuff I'd never do as a guy." Argh! Cutesy stuff! Cowering when Shampoo is near. And…. "They do come with the body. It ain't me." That's a relief.

"Now, you won't like my prescription, but as a fellow martial artist, I'm sure you'll understand. Akane and those who are born girls have had a far greater practice of being a girl than you. You are far more vulnerable to your female impulses while a girl than they are. This puts you at a disadvantage."

Ranma nodded. "The weak spots I have when the girl leave me open to attacks by emotions." His mood became grave as he realized, "My ki techniques are powered by my emotions! My emotions ran wild and I practically destroyed the girls' locker room! I'm a danger to others!"

Dr. Tofu looked at Akane. She nodded. Then she wondered why he kept looking at her. She suddenly had an impulse to get angry. But she couldn't stay angry at her crush.

"I need to find a way to stop bein' a girl, or...or..."

The doctor nodded. "That is my prescription and advice to another martial artist."

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Two girls in Furinkan uniforms left, the redhead was carrying a bag with Chinese clothes in it. But her free hand was doing something else. " _Man~ng_. I thought just wearin' a skirt would make me uncomfortable, but your dress is _too_ tight against the boobs!"

Akane was struggling with her anger, "I'm sorry I have a smaller bust than you! And stop pulling at it! Girls do not do that in public!"

They continued their walk towards the Tendo home and Ranma continued making faces.

It wasn't long before her hands slipped under the skirt.

"You do want guys to notice you!"

"No, of course, I don't! But it feels like your panties want to fall down. They're loose."

Akane was tempted to use the two bookbags she was carrying and…

She remembered what Dr. Tofu had told her while Ranma was changing. Ranma was having a rough time adjusting to having to be a girl. He needed a friend more than ever. She, Akane, was going to be very important in helping the man in him get control of his girl-half.

It sounded almost sexist, but she understood where the wise doctor was coming from. She, too, was a martial artist, after all. A part of her was almost grateful that she hadn't been taught ki techniques.

The rest of her was _not_ grateful!

Akane yanked down on Ranma's skirt.

Ranma's hands were forced down. Feeling no panties around where they were meant to belong had her thinking about what happened out on the school field less than an hour ago: She had gone outside without panties or bloomers and everybody saw that, as that evil Megumi had put it, she was a natural redhead.

Ranma quickly yanked the panties up: Snugly!

Akane's hand popped free of the skirt. A different tactic: "Oh, look, is that Hiroshi and Daisuke?"

"Who?" Ranma looked at her.

"They're friends, somehow, of Sayuri and Yuka, and two of the biggest, immature perverts at school."

Ranma still hadn't gotten it.

She still hadn't acquired a girl's perspective. "They'll love ogling, leering and making cheap come-ons to you. You're acting like the kind of girl they're love to date."

"I don't date guys!" Ranma yelled, looking around for the creeps.

There was only a middle-aged woman returning from the market.

"Ranma! Don't _ever_ say that! People will think you are - that I am - gay!"

"There's too many things I have to learn as a girl!" the redhead cried in frustration. Born girls have had plenty of time to learn everything!

Akane put both bookbags in one hand so she could hug the neo-girl's shoulder with the other. "Think of it as being part of the Girls School of Martial Arts."

"Half the time," Ranma mumbled, "I hope I don't get their techniques mixed up with the Guys School."

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Ranma's outward mood suddenly changed when she reached the Tendo's. She was bound and determined to get her revenge on her idiot pop.

But the first one they encountered was Kasumi, who seemed ever alert as to who was in her house. "Oh, my! You really are registered as a girl at school."

"Yes, I _am!_ And I'm gonna stay a girl at school!" And she twirled so her skirt billowed out, almost revealing she was wearing panties, and definitely showing she wasn't wearing boxers.

Her act was spoiled when she stopped but her boobs didn't want to. She brought her hands up to the distressed bust.

"Ranma's wearing the spare uniform I keep at the clinic for when the one I'm wearing gets damaged in my fights. Uh, could you alter it so it fits him better?"

"If that's what Ranma wants," Kasumi mildly showed she wasn't convinced that he did or should.

"Thank-" She was interrupted by Genma coming down the hall.

"Home _early_ , are you, couldn't take it as-" His mouth had gotten ahead of his brain. What he finally did see did _not_ meet his expectations. "What do you think you're doing!?"

"I'm fittin' in!" she did a decent giggle. "For once I'm gonna be stayin' in one place for at least a year!"

" _Kasumi_ , the hot water! I'll not have a _son_ of mine acting like a girl!"

"But it's okay to _be_ a girl? You made me this way by taking me to that cursed springs! So, suck on it!" She actually had the impulse to grab a boob and present it to him. It rapidly passed.

"Impudent whelp!" Genma said, coming for her.

"My dress!" Akane cried, putting herself between the two.

"Move aside, Akane. I don't fight girls."

"I'm a gir~l now!" And Ranma did another, more careful, twirl. She finished it up with a curtsy, knees bent and the skirt out. Where did _that_ come from?

Genma saw red. If looks could kill.

WHAM! Akane slammed a giant mallet down on the man, driving him into the floorboards. Where did that come _from?_

"Aw, Akane, I coulda-" Then Ranma did warding signs with her fingers. What else was the violent girl capable of?!

Akane dropped the hammer in shock.

"Oh, my! I've never seen Akane do that before," Kasumi said.

"It is the stray magic from the curses. It has to be," Soun said, having witnessed everything from behind Genma. "The longer they stay with us, I dare say, the more _we all_ will be affected."

Ranma felt the tears coming on. It wasn't fair! She had the chance for once in ten long years to stay in one place for a year or maybe more, and she had to leave after just t _wo days?!_ It wasn't fair! She ran for the stairs to cry in the privacy of-

Akane ran up the stairs ahead of her. Crying.

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"Akane?" Ranma knocked on her door. She was still crying, but there weren't as many tears as there would have been if she were just focusing on her own misery. "Can I come in?" There was a muffled answer. Ranma hoped she was doing the right thing by entering.

Akane was sitting up on her bed, curled around her pillow. One look at the weeping Ranma and she turned her tearing eyes away. But it took her mouth from out of the pillow. "Dr. Tofu is right! I am a danger to others! That's why he hasn't trained me in any advanced techniques;" Admitting that, she threw the pillow on the floor and herself stomach-down, hiding her face in her arms. Her was misery renewed.

It was Ranma's turn to try and comfort a friend. She knelt by the bed and placed her hand first on where she could feel Akane's bra band, then above it. "We, we both have stuff to learn. We won't if," and she tried to wipe her tears away, "all we do is cry about it."

Akane rolled her head. Then raised it. She saw her friend's tears being replaced by fire. "That's it! If the old fool thinks I'm old enough to marry, then I'm old enough to _stay!_ "

The fire melted. "If you'll have me.

"-No, I should leave. I don't want my magic hurtin' you, too."

All Akane did was reach out and take Ranma's hand. That was all she had to do.

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Kasumi was still standing guard at the bottom of the stairs with her stirring spoon when Nabiki came home. "You're early, Nabiki."

"One class had a test. No test and it would've been detention. I heard what happened at school."

"Oh, good! Maybe you could tell me. No one seems to tell me anything."

"I will….

"What happened here?" she asked, seeing broken floorboards and a large, wooden mallet in the main hallway.

"Father says it was done with magic."

"Magic?!" Nabiki's concern turned like a wind vane.

"While both of our cursed houseguests were present, Akane hit Uncle Saotome with a hammer that came out of nowhere."

"Where is she now?"

"She's up in her room. Ranma's trying to comfort her."

Nabiki gasped and took a couple of steps backward as she watched the mallet disappear and the floorboards return to the way she remembered them to be.

Kasumi smiled. "Oh, yes. I think Ranma has succeeded."

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"Then I'm _going_ on a training trip with Ranma!" Akane told the gathering of her family and the Saotomes.

"I _do not_ allow females on our training trips!" Genma told her and them.

"I ain't goin' nowhere! I'm _stayin'!_ " Then the changed and male Ranma became less adamant. "If Mr. Tendo'll let me."

"No, Daddy! Magic is illogical - There's no telling what will happen to _us_ if they remain!" Nabiki argued.

"It will mean more work for me. But our lives have been getting a _mite_ routine, Father," Kasumi said.

Soun Tendo wept. "I rather _liked_ our routine. I had more than enough adventures with Genma's and our martial arts master."

"May he rest forever in peace," Genma prayed.

"But while the Master's students, Genma and I made a solemn and sacred pledge that our two branches of the Anything-Goes School would be united by marriage and heir.

"It's been nearly sixteen years now," Genma spoke. "Maybe the memory of the Master has faded among his…. Those that knew him." Maybe they did not have to repair the reputation of the Anything-Goes School.

"A vow is a vow _and_ a pledge is a pledge. I have been maintaining this dojo for too long, waiting for you to return from your trip, gathering new techniques. I will not see our plan fail!" Soun wept at the thought.

"What about the _magic_ , Daddy!"

Soun's determination wavered. But he said, " 'What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger'. Is that not how the cliche goes? A martial arts improves his skills by being tested. - And magic will certainly put us to the test!" And he began to cry harder than before.

"But what of us who _don't want_ to be martial artists!" Nabiki said, getting closer to Kasumi.

"You are the daughters of a dojo master. You live with a dojo.

"And we all practice our own form of martial arts," Kasumi smiled. Nabiki wonder just what the hell her older sister was thinking. But she did not argue with her. She knew she was defeated, tactically. Nabiki prided herself at her ability to find a way to overcome or even the opportunities in setbacks.

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Since everybody was at the table, Kasumi decided to serve a meal. It wouldn't be supper, but something light and delicious to make everybody feel better. And quick. She didn't know how long the truce would last.

They were all still pretty quiet and untalkative when she returned to set the table. "No water for my son!" Genma said, taking away the glass she had sat down in front of the boy who couldn't be trusted with water.

"Hey! There's no food on the table, and you're already swipin' my meal!" Ranma knew better, but fighting over food with his Old Man had become a habit. And he was in no mood to give the _idiot_ the satisfaction of having _won_ a battle!

The inevitable happened. To both of them. "Bwar!" complained the panda.

" ' Can't understand you!" the redhead said, forcing a smile beneath her frown.

"Oh, my. I still have bamboo left over. Maybe, as a panda, Uncle Saotome would prefer that."

"That's right!" Ranma said, snatching its plate away. "People food is bad for _animals_ like you!"

Of course, a battle at the table ensued. Soun, Kasumi, and Akane calmly ate from their plates. Nabiki, still spooked by magic, carefully but subtly studied the cursed pair's actions. She had to give them credit. They were skilled martial artists. What seemed an outright brawl wasn't allowed to involve others.

Then something happened that shouldn't have happened. A paw's claws ripped the front of Ranma's Chinese shirt. Her boobs fell out.

"Oh, my!" Soun choked on his food. "Oh, my!" And Akane brought out the mallet for the second time.

"Oh, my!"

And Nabiki snapped a picture of bared boobs.

 _Where_ did that come from? Making money selling candid photos had taught her how to hide her camera until the right moment came. But she knew she hadn't brought her camera down.

WHAM! Click.

It had to have been magic!

It was an opportunity!

Maybe she had a reason to welcome _magic_ into her life.

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While Ranma was in the furo, Kasumi was in the utility/laundry room. He discovered why she'd been there only after his soak in the hot tub.

"Your pants and spare shirt will be laundered in about 90 minutes, Ranma," Kasumi told him.

"Why'dyou hafta do all my clothes?!"

"You were on the road a long time since you last washed them. Their trip to the bushes didn't help. But you can change into your martial arts gi."

"I could if I had it anymore. It's a long story. I ended up wearin' Chinese clothes because of it."

"You must tell us about it some time!"

"I'd rather not. I'm not good at tellin' about…." His eyes fell on his friend Akane. She was his friend only because he had told her the truth. And more than one truth. "Okay. I will."

Click.

"Nabiki!" Akane cried and Ranma frowned.

" _Beefcake!_ " she smiled, reminding them that a very athletic figure of a young man was standing before them in only his boxers.

And Akane did need reminding. She was getting so comfortable being around Ranma, that she failed to really notice how little he had on. Until now. " _Cover_ up! _Change_ into a girl!"

He looked down at himself. "Guys wear this much at the beach. And I'd have to cover up more if I'm a girl." He lifted the towel he had around his neck to show her his still male nipples.

Click. Click. "I don't mind. Go right ahead, Ranma."

Ranma frowned at the middle sister again. Something was reinforcing his vow not to be like his old man and be a thief, too. Or borrow anything without asking. He couldn't bring himself to take her camera from her. Just like he couldn't take Akane's hammer away from her.

Click. "Too bad beefcake doesn't sell as well as cheesecake. Would you mind becoming a girl for me?"

"Yes, I'd mind! I have to be a girl at school. I _don't_ have to be here! I can be _myself!_ "

But he saw that Akane didn't want to look at him. She would _try_ , but would then blush and turn away again.

With an aggravated sigh, he said, "Fine! Get me something that _fits_ me and I'll change. - But no pictures of me without clothes on!"

Nabiki smirked at the latitude semantics gave her.

"I think my measurements come closest to yours as a girl, Ranma," Kasumi said. "Only…."

Only the eldest sister was nearly as tall as he was _as a guy_. Ranma was very much aware of how short he was as the girl. "I have some things in my room I will lend you.

"In the meantime," she said and, noting Akane's unease, took off her apron with the ruffles, "you can wear this."

And then Ranma saw other "only"s.

Only, Kasumi was wearing a skirt that would come down to _the girl's_ ankles. Only, Kasumi was wearing a skirt, and a plain but elegant blouse. Did the woman own anything that wasn't _feminine?_

"You may be able to squeeze into one of my slacks," Nabiki offered.

"Really?"

"Sure! The tighter the better," she smiled, holding up her camera.

"Why don't I just wait until the washin's done," he told them, refusing to put on the apron he held as long as he was a guy.

Then the front door slid open. "Hello? May we come in?" It was that _bitch_ Megumi from school! And she'd brought her back-up! Ranma splashed himself.

While Ranma was putting on the apron, Akane got ahead of her and blocked her way at the end of the main hall. "What do you want?! Another fight?! I beat you once! And I now know how you fight, so I can beat you _easier_ this time!"

"I'll beat you _without_ knowing your fightin' style!" The redhead was so furious with the bitch and her crew, she could burn most of the Code.

Megumi took her crude fighting stance, and Yasushi joined her.

"Uh, that's not the reason we came here after detention," Ayane reminded them.

Megumi stood down. Then bowed down. The other two joined her. "You have every right to hate me. It was a mean, terrible thing I did. It was (because…)" her voice faded.

"It's because she's jealous of you, Akane," Ayane said.

"And she now knows she can't beat you," Yasushi said.

"Well, I _was_ raised in a dojo," Akane said, proud of her family's tradition in martial arts.

"That's not it," Ayane said, looking at Yasushi, knowing as far as her companion was concerned that was it. "Megumi has the hots for Kuno-senpai."

"You mean the hots for his money," Nabiki said from behind Ranma. Before Megumi could get a strong glare at her, she added with a glint of greed, "I can't say I blame you. He's the richest eligible and ineligible guy around."

Megumi looked away. "It's more than that."

"Megumi has a thing for handsome guys!" Yasushi smiled at her own memories of him.

"Her being the tough girl can get her tongue-tied," Ayane said. The only time Megumi could speak well was when she thought she could control of a situation as its leader. That was why Ayane was doing most of the speaking now. "You know how important eloquence is to Kuno,"

"Too well," Akane said with angry memories.

"You want Kuno, and Akane doesn't. Maybe we can work out a deal," Nabiki offered.

"What!? Why should we want to help her?!" Ranma cried.

" _We're not helping her_. We're helping _Akane_. You do want to help your... _friend_."

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Ranma was about to turn around and lead the way to the common room when Nabiki tugged at her boxers. The redhead's hands flew around and pulled the back of the apron closer together. She was still sensitive about what happened in the locker room, including being teased about not wearing panties.

So, Ranma brought up the rear of the line of girls.

Instead of the common room, though, they entered the first room down the hall, the formal living room. It was done in very Japanese-traditional style. There was no table but some cushions on the tatami mat floor and a few armrests.

"Have some seats, ladies," Nabiki gestured but made sure not to include Ranma in it. But she was looking directly at her, when she added, "And I use the term loosely.

"As you all know, well, almost all of you, I have business dealings with Kuno-baby. He is a great patron of the arts, and considers photography an art form."

Megumi and Yasushi snorted.

"I do not take money from Akane for, one, she's my sister, and, two, she doesn't want Kuno's attention.

"You, on the other hand, Megumi Sato, I will accept money from. As payment for matchmaking services."

"Can you really deliver?" Megumi was not convinced.

"With Akane's help, yes. Money-back almost guaranteed. How, you may ask. I'll tell you when I get my first installment."

There was grumbling.

Akane broke it with, "If it'll get Kuno and that hentai horde away from me, I'll contribute money."

"Me, too!" Ranma said. Uh, except, she didn't have any money right then.

That was enough for Megumi and Yasushi to ante-up, promising more when they had it.

"Akane, meet your new best friend, Megumi!"

"Hey, I'm - That, that is, I mean-" Ranma's protest sputtered out.

Akane reached out to touch the hand of her real-

"Here you are, Ranma…-chan." Kasumi said, seeing the three new guests. "I brought you the clothes. I'm sorry I took so long, but Nabiki's slacks-"

"That's okay, Kasumi. Did you bring panties?"

"Why, yes, I did." And she handed them to the embarrassed girl reaching around her back for them.

"You _are_ trying to be more like a girl," Megumi said.

"When a girl, be like a girl." If her friends were going to be girls, she wanted to _fit in_ with the group as much as she could. As long as she didn't lose his manhood. Dr. Tofu's explanation that a girl's body always had a girl's brain also meant a guy's body always had a guy's brain. That was what she was placing his hopes on.

Seeing that the apron kept her covered, Ranma took her plump butt off the cushion to pull her boxers down her legs and off, and did the reverse when pulling Kasumi's panties on. They fit _too_ well! She wasn't used to the all-around, abbreviated snugness, especially in the crotch. A crotch without any manhood. She almost felt like crying. So not manly. But she reminded herself, I am a girl, I am a girl, later, I'll be a guy, but right now, I'm a girl.

"The first step is I take photos of Megami and Akane together in the arena and dojo, practicing the art."

"I'm _not_ teaching a bully how to fight better! A true martial artist _shouldn't_ fight the weak!" Akane told her.

"Yeah!" Ranma agreed.

"Excuse me, dojo daughters!" Ayane spoke up. "How do you know any one of your students aren't or _will_ become what you call a bully?"

"Well, we try and screen applicants. And, uh, observe their traits as they train. And, uh, um…"

"And _risk_ going out of business," Nabiki said, too aware of that being her own daddy's philosophy.

"By the purity of their _ki_ ," Ranma said definitively.

"Whatever," Nabiki said. "You won't be _actually_ teaching Megumi or her friends, Akane. It's just for show!" And she brought out her camera. "I take photos of you two together, doing different things. Then my classmate Kuno sees them and schemes to get to you through Megumi. Then begins _Phase Two_ of the plan. Which will be revealed when the time and money is right."

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As Akane, Megumi and the others headed for the dojo, Kasumi said, "Ranma, you shouldn't go out like that. All you have on is an apron and panties."

"Aw, I don't know why. It's not like I'm gonna be out in the street. And there'll only be me and the girls. Like Akane said, I ain't got nothin' they ain't seen. As long as I'm the girl."

"You didn't make a good impression at school today, did you? Not with those three."

Kasumi did have a point. And while she was offered lots of help with her schoolwork between classes - more in one day than she had gotten in all her years of partial schooling! - she noticed it was a different kind of treatment the other, born-girls, gave each other. Perhaps, she, for once in her life, _should_ try to fit in. She had a whole year, maybe more, before she'd be yanked away! She just had to remind herself, I _am_ a girl, I _am_ a girl, later, I'll be a guy, but right now, I'm a _girl_.

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Ranma came out to the sandy area in front of the dojo. She was wearing one of Kasumi's plain, white blouses that still screamed, to her, femininity. And she was wearing one of Nabiki's slacks with the legs pinned up to keep her from stepping on the ends. Both were snug like the panties she wore. All too snug to do any of the punches and kicks Akane was doing to the practice dummy.

"Nice!" Nabiki smiled, turning her camera on Ranma. Click. Click. "Turn around." Click. Click. Ranma actually followed her directing. Now for an opportunity to teach her about modeling.

But Ranma was only thinking about how Akane was moving and the force and angle of her delivery, and….

...And how much Megumi was trying to hide her fear. She really was a bully. But, Ranma hoped, not too deeply. She would know when she saw her use a ki technique. If she were even capable of doing any.

Yasushi nudged Ayane, but it was this one who spoke, "How could anybody mistake you for a boy!? You're as short as a kid, but no boy has a figure like that! You're so busty!"

"Your nipples are showing," Yasushi said.

"I know," Ranma frowned. "This shirt's too snug."

"Like the pants," Ayane said.

"You got an ass like your tits," Yasushi said.

"I know," Ranma frowned more. "It, they come with the body. It's _not_ like I had a choice."

"Why would you _want_ to choose another body!? Most girls would kill for a cute yet sexy body like yours!"

"A girl drowned…." Ranma stopped herself. She inhaled and then told another truth. "I was raised to be a guy. I'd rather have a guy's body."

"You can have as many guy bodies as you like," Yasushi said. Ayane laughed, though her friend was serious. Ranma allowed herself to be confused.

"I only want one guy's body."

" _Oo!_ A love interest! Does he know you're a girl? Are you keeping it a secret from him? If, yes, _how?_ "

"Is he yaoi?" Yasushi asked.

" _No_ , he's _not_ gay!" Ranma vehemently answered. "It's because of my _idiot_ pop I get separated from him!" Yes, she was telling the truth. Just not the whole truth.

"Don't forget I'm interested in him, too!" Akane said and broke the wooden dummy in two.

"A love triangle?!" Ayane's gossipy mind was delighted.

"A friendly, uh, relationship," the very sweaty girl said, coming over to them and Ranma. She took both hands in hers. "We'll know in one year."

[][][]

"No details! No details!" Akane said as they re-entered the house.

"Right. No details!" Ranma agreed. They _had_ no details. None they wanted shared!

They both heard Nabiki whisper, "The details will cost you. And you've used all your ready cash in my matchmaking contract."

"Nabiki!"

"What?" She coolly turned to the couple. "Do you want details or not?" They knew she could provide a more believable story than the truth they wanted to dance around, one step in, one step out.

"Okay, then. Now, Megumi. You are to meet up with Akane before she reaches the school gate tomorrow. You two make it look like you've settled your differences and are trying to be friends. You, _too,_ Ranma. It will help you get your reputation back. The two toughest girls in school are ready to defend your honor."

"But _I'm_ the toughest - Girl _or_ Guy!"

"Not anymore. Not until Megumi gets her hooks well into Kuno! Why do you think he's so obsessed with the best female fighter in school, if not Nerima!? You beat him, and you're just asking him to give you _the same_ treatment as Akane - Maybe worse!"

"Worse?"

"That's for me to know and you to pay for."

"Wow!" Ayane said. "I knew Nabiki liked money, but I've never seen her _this_ …"

"Greedy," Megumi agreed.

"Are you still boy-crazy?" Yasushi asked.

Nabiki stopped to blink. "I don't _know_. My mind's alive with multiple schemes and the chances to make more money than I've _ever seen_!" Magic? But if this shift in her personality was because of a spell, let her drink of this potent potion, this elixir of life!

[][][]

After their guests had left, Ranma said, "I'm changin'!" And she headed for the kitchen.

"Oh, my, please don't!"

"I agree," Nabiki said. "I don't want my pants ruined when you pop the seams."

"Not to mention what would happen to you in panties," _Aa!_ Akane couldn't believe she had actually said something so...perverted!

Ranma looked down at what she was wearing. "Aw, man! I can't wear clothes that fit right as a girl. They won't when I become a guy!"

"The answer is simple. Just stay a girl when you're dressed as one," Nabiki said.

"That's too simple!" And too right.

Akane came to her friend's rescue. "You _only_ have to be a girl while in school."

Well, she tried. Ranma couldn't admit it, but she wanted to spend more time with her girl friends as the girl. She was sure he couldn't have the easy, no hint of anything else but friendship if they knew him as a guy. She was tired of complications.

But complications wouldn't leave him alone. Or Akane. As Nabiki pointed out, "You know, Akane, by claiming to be in a love triangle with Ranma, you didn't really change the rumor that you're a lesbian. With the way you became so friendly with Ranma, the gossip now will have you being bisexual."

"What!? Oh, _great!_ What have I done?!"

"100,000 yen."

"You know I don't have that kind of money, Nabiki."

"No, but being bisexual is now also Ranma's reputation as a girl. You share it because of your, quote, "friendly relationship". I can tell you how to fix both at the same time. 100,000 yen." She held up her camera.

"No! No, Nabiki, no!" Akane said. "I can't believe you'd stoop so low! If Ranma marries one of us, she - He'll - be family!"

"A bisexual family, in truth as well as gossip."

"Is that bad?" Ranma asked.

"Don't listen to Nabiki, Ranma! Money has _warped_ her sense of values."

Akane still hadn't told Ranma whether she considered bisexuality bad or not. Ranma saw that it was something her friend was not ready to deal with. And, being brand new to _friendship_ let alone to this particular friend, the redhead wasn't ready to press any issue.

"Ranma, your clothes should be dry enough to wear by now," Kasumi told him, leading the way.

"Good!" she said, heading for the utility room. Nabiki, and Akane after her, followed.

"Where are you going to _get_ the money for a girls uniform?" Nabiki asked.

"I can alter a uniform I have kept for sentimental reasons," Kasumi volunteered. "I can have it ready before you go to school tomorrow."

Thanks, Big Sis, Nabiki thought.

"You'll need money to _buy_ lingerie and other non-uniform clothes!"

"The lingerie will be much harder to alter. Perhaps something without elastic," Kasumi said, thinking about how it could possibly be done.

Again, Thanks, Big Sis. "As for other items of feminine apparel…"

"Kasumi! Ranma will only be a girl _at school!_ " Akane insisted.

Ranma stopped as she passed the open door to the garden. Outside, a panda was still struggling to be free of the tire that had been shoved down around it, trapping its forelegs. It did not help that it hung upside down from a tree by a chain around its ankles. A torn, red shirt was still shoved and taped into its muzzle. "Aw, I'm gonna have to let him down when night comes."

[] [] []

In the original _Ranma 1/2_ , Kuno, Ryoga, Mouse, Kodachi, Shampoo, et al. had a "friendly" relationship with their enemies, people they wanted to maim, if not kill! Having frenemies is the standard practice of the series. At least, Megumi, Yasushi, and Ayane are not trying to go _that_ far. This is only a truce.


	2. Chapter 4 Quest to Be One of the Girls

An unusual disclaimer: Ranma ½ is a trademark of Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ Communications, and its characters have been borrowed without permission. And Son Turned Daughter was originally written in 2002 by the FanFiction author Tangent, and his characters Megumi, Yasushi and Ayane have, likewise, been borrowed without permission. Please see the first two chapters under _his_ pen name. This story is written for non-commercial purposes only.

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Ranma hasn't yet learned to do any of the blatant, attention-getting _ki_ techniques. His are still ones that are not easily noticed by the layman. But he has them because Genma was all too familiar with them from his days studying under Happosai. The heir to the Anything-Goes School _had to know_ ki _techniques._

[][][] [][][] [][][]

Day Three since the Saotomes had arrived began with another of their sparring matches in the Tendo garden yard. Or was it merely sparring?

"I _told_ you, Pop, ruin Kasumi's negligee and she _won't_ give you breakfast!" the redhead taunted.

"Then get out of that abomination! You dressed like a schoolgirl yesterday. Today, you're like a working girl in a bordello!"

"Mr. Saotome!" Kasumi raised her voice. "That is _my_ nightie I loaned Ranma-chan!"

"Uh, _sorry,_ Kasumi, dear!" Genma was forced to eat his words again. And Ranma laughed.

The pigtailed girl kept the purple, see-through negligee just out of the reach of her Old Man, insulting him further by performing a few kata moves along the way. She preferred those that 'accidentally' brought attention to the matching purple panties she was wearing. She stayed away from moves that would have swung or bounced her boobs around too much. She wasn't wearing anything over them to constrain them and wasn't convinced that the positives of bras outweighed the negatives. Anyway, her idiot Old Man's eyes kept returning to her girl-sized nipples as they were moved and jiggled about, so they had some tactical value.

Her routine kata moves changed into one she hadn't intended. Her female impulses had her skipping over near the koi pond. Since this further aggravated her already outraged pop, she went with it. "Oo, the water: So cold! Come here, Big Man. It's not me that has to worry about getting wet, now." That was the straw that broke the idiot's concentration. He did a low leap, best foot forward, intending to kick out the mockery to manhood!

 _She_ did a higher leap. Just high enough to land on his right thigh and prance along it, up his torso, face and push off from the back of his bald head. She heard a satisfying splash that told her her sensei hadn't landed cleanly in the pond. She landed on the ball of her foot - her arm briefly against the boobs so they didn't bounce too much - and did a twirl of victory. This one was better than the ones she had done yesterday. She had learned more how to slow the momentum of her boobs so they didn't come to a sudden and uncomfortable stop. "Ta-da!"

Kasumi was her only audience. She applauded. "I gave you a nightie I haven't used. But I'm glad to see you can take care of my things, Ranma-chan. It makes me feel I can trust you with my clothes."

Ranma's mood sobered some. That was right. The only girl-clothes available to her were those belonging to the too feminine Kasumi or, for pants, the camera-happy Nabiki. Unfortunately, Akane was just too small in the boob and too large in the butt departments. It would have been nice to wear something that belonged to a friend. Did Akane have any pants?

Well, she didn't have to think about that now. As far as she knew, all she would have to wear as the girl today was a Furinkan girls uniform. A part of her still rebelled at the idea. The part conditioned by her Old Man, sensei, pop, no doubt. She turned to the panda, just sitting up straight in the cold water, and bowed. "Thank you for registering me at school as a _girl!_ I'm going to change into my dress now!" And she bounded off like she couldn't wait to get into it!

"I've altered an old uniform of mine for you, Ranma-chan, according to the measurements we took of you. 34C-24-34."

"Right, Kasumi. You said I should remember the numbers. 34C-24-34. Uh, why the "C"?"

"It's your cup-size." Kasumi saw the neo-girl was thinking about the wrong kind of cup. "Cups are what bras have to hold the breasts."

Ranma looked down at her non-held boobs. "Oh!" And she made her hands into cup shapes over them. "Okay…."

"That's alright, Ranma-chan, there are women who still get the wrong cup or bra size. It can be complicated."

"Then I won't-"

Click, click, click. Nabiki came in the common room in baggy, rumbled pajamas.

" _Playing_ with yourself, Ranma?" Nabiki smiled. Great shots! More to add to her "Redhead in Purple Nightie" folder.

"I was learnin' about cups and bras from Big Sister." Clueless, she kept her hands in place to show she understood about cups.

"Big Sister?" Aw, that was the first time Ranma-chan had called her that. Nabiki and Akane were practically grown women and soon would not need her. But Ranma-chan did. She, Kasumi, was little older than her younger sisters. She was having to deal with her own puberty issues as her sisters were having theirs. She was sure she had failed them. With Ranma-chan, though, she had a second chance, this time as a woman past most of the pains of maturing. Ranma-chan did not have the, ahem, luxury of a slow change into womanhood. It just hit her, suddenly, unexpectedly. And the change the poor girl would have was to constantly go through, time and again, the rapid, wrenching changes, going from...

Oh, my! That's right, "Ranma is a boy. Nabiki, don't tease Ranma-kun." How easy it was to forget while he wasn't a boy.

"She's teasin' me?!" Ranma frowned at her, taking her hands away from her boobs, almost forming fists.

Click. Click. "Being a girl is about _teasing_."

"Not your kind of teasing, Nabiki. And not-"

"Not what Megumi and her gang do!" sweaty Akane said, coming in in her morning jogging outfit. "Ranma! Are you still wearing that flimsy, perverted-"

"It's Kasumi's!"

"It's when she wants to _tease_ ," Nabiki smiled triumphantly. Point made.

"And I haven't worn it." Teasing did seem out of character for her.

"Put some real clothes on, Ranma, before Dad sees you again! You could have killed him last evening!"

"It's his own fault if he don't watch where he's goin'!"

"Don't get into a fight. You two have been getting along so well," Kasumi pleaded.

"You could take lessons from Ranchan-"

" _Don't_ call me that That's for only special people." Everybody in the room could hear and feel how serious Ranma was about that.

"Uh, okay," Nabiki had to stay on her good side. At least until she knew how to manipulate her better. "Daddy demonstrated the tactical value of a girl being a tease. Only your problem with "perverts", Akane, prevents _you_ from having the same advantage."

"You just want to take cheap, tawdry pictures of me! AND Ranma! What if you marry him!?"

"Now, _there's_ a thought," Nabiki smirked.

"I won't let you!"

"Oh, my!" Kasumi the peacemaker had to step in. "If you want breakfast before you head to school, you three had better change into your uniforms,"

As Ranma went to freshen up in the bath room after her morning workout, she passed Mr. Tendo along the way. Soun stared straight ahead, refusing to ogle at the young, cute, well-endowed and topless girl hiding nothing in the see-through except what her panties covered. He walked on. And on off the garden porch. This time a wet panda was there to catch him.

And then to throw him down to the ground in disgust.

[][][]

"Now, turn." Click. Click. Nabiki was teaching Ranma, without her being aware of it, how to model. For the cursed girl's part, she was just demonstrating how great a job Kasumi had done of making this school uniform fit.

"Yes. You always do your best, Big Sis," Akane said, jealous of abilities she herself totally lacked.

"I got room to breathe!" the busty girl said, showing the inch of extra room the bib of the jumper gave her. Okay, she wasn't Nabiki's perfect model. Yet.

"And you have the half-slip on?" Akane asked.

Ranma rolled her eyes and said, "Yes." She lifted the hem to show it. Wasn't one dress enough to have wear?

"What about the panties I've never worn?" Kasumi said.

The redhead frowned. "Still snug. And, and…." her voice petered.

"Purple?" Nabiki raised an eyebrow and a smile. "Satiny?"

"Kasumi! Ranma can't wear those to school! Think about gym class! - _Again!_ "

"It's,it's okay," Ranma tried to sound convincing. "I can't use the ones I wore yesterday."

"I'm sorry," Kasumi said. "I was busy with altering the uniform, taking care of father's injuries, and other necessary chores, and there wasn't enough of a load for to do the laundry."

"Ranma had an "accident?" Nabiki really had trouble toning down her display of amusement. "What kind of wet was it?"

Ranma turned beet red, feeling the humiliation, wishing the ground would open up and swallow her. Instead, she threw herself against Akane's shoulder. Akane hugged her friend and patted her head right down to the pigtail.

"Nabiki, I borrow Dr. Tofu's medical books," Kasumi sternly told her younger sister. "I know the male and female urethra systems are different."

"There are many things Ranma has to practice doing as a girl," Akane defended.

[][][]

Nabiki almost wasn't allowed to walk with them to school, but her _Palm-Kuno-Off-Onto-Megumi_ Plan required her to be with them. It wasn't long before she was bringing up something more the other two did not want to talk about. "You're not wearing any socks?" All Ranma had on her feet were her Chinese fighting slippers.

"I never wear socks," Ranma told her.

"But you _have_ to. It's important to every schoolgirl she gets the _right kind_ of socks. The kind of socks is not part of the dress code, and a girl can express her individuality that way."

"How many girls don't wear socks at Furinkan? None? Then I'm more an individual than all them."

"But each style of socks has a demographic to go with it. Bare is too unique."

"Then, _if_ Ranma doesn't wear something that appeals to any of your "demographics", guys _won't_ be interested in her?" Akane used the chance to get a dig in at the middle sister.

"Good. Then I'll won't wear socks. I don't want demo-guys interested in me."

"Having no socks _is_ against the school dress code. I'm not lying. When you find out, I'll help you pick out the style that best suits you, Ranma."

"Don't listen to her, Ranma. The school doesn't strictly enforce the dress code. _Honestly!_ Kuno goes around in his keno-gi half the time and that stupid horde of hentai have to wear their sports club uniforms to their homerooms after I beat them up right before the school bell!"

[][][]

Megumi, Ayane, and Yasushi were waiting around the last corner before the way to the gates of Furinkan High. "We thought you were going to be late," said the tall, muscular girl with one lock dyed blonde.

"See, Ranma? Most Japanese schools discourage any color but the natural hair color?" Akane said.

"Go to another school, and they might make you dye that red _mop_ black!" Megumi said.

"Hmm! I might like that. ' something to think about."

"The tensions are building here, _people_!" Nabiki told them. "We're supposed to be trying to act like friends, _remember_? Try to touch each other without any hurting. No, Ranma, don't hold Yasushi's hand. Yasushi!? _You're_ holding Ranma's hand? Stop it! You people aren't _that_ friendly!"

"Yeah, Yasushi, you don't want everybody to think you're like them?" Implying bisexual.

" _Megumi_! What did I say! If you want Kuno, none of that. Again. Ever! Now, Akane, like it or not, you have to pair up with Megumi. Ayane, not Yasushi, is with Ranma. I'll keep an eye on Yasushi. Okay, in places? Walk! -Closer: You've signed a truce!"

And so the long block-long walk towards the gate began.

"So, Ranma, give us the details. Who's this guy you're interested in? You like his body. That means he's a martial artist, too, right? What style? One that preachers strong upper-body strength? Are his muscles like cords? Does he have a bulging chest?" Ayane the gossip noticed the little redhead's reaction to "bulging chest". Oo, it made her feel juicy. She went on trying to infer more things from the red-faced redhead's reactions. Unfortunately for her, most of them were lost in translation, as the new girl didn't seem to understand entirely what she was referring to.

Thankfully, the long walk finally was over. All they had to face now was one captain of the kendo club and legitimate heir to the samurai. Tatewaki Kuno-senpai...

"...the Blue Thunder of Furinkan High!"

" _Why_ are you telling us that!? We already know what _you_ call yourself!" Akane told him.

"Yeah!" Megumi almost matched her rival in the bravado she was told Kuno adored. And she only _almost_ remained tongue-tied.

"Of course, I, the handsome, wealthy, intelligent, heir to the fiefdom of Nerima need no introduction to you lovely ladies-in-waiting. I speak to the feisty lass of yesterday that broke through her maidenly reserve to actually speak to her better."

"What did he say?" Ranma asked.

"He wants you to fight him," Nabiki whispered from behind her. "Don't!"

"Aw, man!" Geez! Aaa! No way! Have to hold back?! It was killing her!

"Leave Ranma out of this!" Akane said. "Yeah!" said Megumi. Pay attention to Her, Megumi Sato!

"Then she is one of the common, who does not make good on their word. They merely make empty gestures of no importance."

Ranma roared!

"Ranma, no!" Nabiki told her. "NO!" Akane screamed. "No," Megumi prayed.

The star pupil of the Saotome School of Anything-Goes Martial Arts took to the air! Needing someone _else_ to lose face, she stepped on Kuno's! He was sent to the pavement!

She didn't stay but kept on running, to disappear off to the side of the main building.

"What?" Megumi asked the kami. "What does Ranma think she's doing?" Nabiki asked.

"I think I know!" Akane cried and rushed to follow, stepping on Kuno two times without realizing it. Megumi decided to follow the example of her rival and also stepped on her love interest.

Nabiki remained behind with the money machine. "Guess who has infirmary duty today!?" she grinned.

They were just around the corner of the main school building, just out of sight of the main gate, was the hentai horde. Kuno had warned them to remain there, but he hadn't left them like this! Lying on the ground, up against and even on the security wall were bodies dressed in the uniforms of the dozens of sports clubs, including ballet and yoga. Akane knew Ranma could have taken them all down faster than even she could, but her friend felt the great, hormonal need to vent. That's why the petite cutie was spinning a sumo wrestler around and around over her head.

Megumi was aghast! And not just at the bodies. Scenes like this were common with Akane around. No, what shook her were the croquet ball, hockey puck, baseball, Indian club, epee, and even tennis balls lodged into the cinderblock walls around them. And that wasn't mentioning the bowling ball-sized chunk that was missing from the grounds-wall.

WHOP! The tiny terror threw the sumo down and began bouncing on him like he was a trampoline, remembering to keep her skirt's hem pulled down.

Megumi for the first time fully understood she had done the right thing by apologizing in person for what she had done to the _super_ girl midget.

"Ranma! That's _enough_! You could seriously hurt these hentais!" Akane told her, rushing to her. She reached out to pull Ranma off the sumo boy, but was herself lifted into the air as she went up.

Suddenly, both were sprawled on the ground! "Ow!" Akane cried. She looked to the superiorly skilled martial artist for an explanation of why she allowed this unexpected tumble to happen. It was much more unexpected than she imagined.

"Akane! You shouldn't use mid-air techniques unless you know what you're doin'!"

[][][]

"So much for being alone with Kuno-baby," Nabiki sighed as the first wave of Ranma's victims were brought into the school infirmary. "Better call in the back-up." And she went to the hotline phone.

Barefoot (not in her outdoor shoes) Ranma helped the limping Akane (still in her outdoor shoes) into the long room with beds. The redhead, though, also was in some pain. Mostly from over-bounced, bruised boobs, no doubt. It should be a lesson to the neo-girl about the importance of wearing a bra. "Don'tyou worry, Akane. As soon as I heal myself, I'll use my ki techniques to take care of your sprained ankle."

"D,Did I really use one of your mid-air techniques?"

"You sure did!" she genuinely smiled, proud of what her friend had done. "And you only had to see it once! You have a real talent for the Art!" Akane cried, and Ranma cried along with her. So, these were happy tears.

"Take a seat," Nabiki motioned. "All the beds are going to be full of boys who need them more than you two." The happy tears were replaced with tears of dread.

"It's these girl hormone-things! I lost control again. This time, people _did_ get damaged!"

"We don't know that. We will when Dr. Tofu arrives."

"He's coming here?!" Akane looked forward to seeing her crush again.

"He's coming here!?" Ranma did not look forward to seeing the man who warned her that things like this could happen unless she learned to be more of a girl as the girl.

Akane was so excited, she told the new girl in school that, "Because Furinkan specializes in martial arts clubs, it needs somebody more medically qualified than just a nurse. Dr. Tofu comes over when there seems to be a real emergency."

"Emergency?" Ranma felt utterly sick and guilty.

"We don't _know_ that," Nabiki said. "You're not the only martial artist who knows how to heal themselves. In fact, with the way these idiots bounce back for more punishment, I'd say this school specializes not so much in sports as martial arts but slapstick.

"In fact, there is no reason for Kuno to be as bad off as he appears to be. If he weren't so rich, I'd say he usually bounces like a rubber check."

Akane limped over to him. "Internal injuries?!" she asked, remembering, at last, that she may have stomped on him.

"Well, there is the loss of a lot of blood. More than his feeble brain could handle, it seems. It's made him unconscious, for now. But as a dojo daughter, my guess is no. The blood is mostly from his…" then it dawns on her, "his nose!

"Ranma, you stepped on his face!"

"Yeah. I did."

"Are you still wearing Kasumi's panties?!"

The Fury of Furinkan hunched in on herself. After a moment, she meekly admitted, "I wanted to save them to show to gym class. I didn't want another accident."

[][][]

Between classes, Ranma and Akane snuck away to the infirmary. Dr. Tofu greeted them, "Akane, Ranma! I'm just finished triage, and you'll be glad to know no one has suffered any lasting damage.

"Only 'cuz they're martial artists and can heal themselves. If they were...bystanders, civilians…." The little redhead wrung her skirt at the thought. "I need to practice being a girl more."

"I wouldn't put what happened entirely down to being a girl. From what I heard, male pride was also involved."

"But I was in my _girl_ body, using my _girl_ brain, my _girl_ fists! I never felt more _out-of-control!_ I was almost a berserker!" Then she thought, "Maybe that's why girls act all girly-girly and soft and cuddly and weak. It helps them to stay the opposite of _crazy_."

"Ranma! You're playing into your _dad's_ stereotype of women!" Akane reprimanded.

"I agree with Akane, Ranma. Those girls who act that way are usually putting on an act. They're not really like that."

Ranma's wringing now included her half-slip and the skirt's hem was moving up higher on her thighs. Soon it would be revealed if she had put the panties back on. "But, but it feels right for this body. I don't have _a_ girl's brain, I have _one_ girl's brain. It feels like she wants to be like her body, cute with lots of _softness_ , up here, and down there, in the backside. She wants to be…" she hunted for the right word. She found it in this memory of that morning, "a tease."

[][][]

Dr. Tofu and Akane tried to talk her out of the stereotype that went with her petite yet curvaceous body, of course. But their privacy was interrupted by a fresh wave of injuries. This time they came from Megumi. Ayane would tell them that her leader had decided if she didn't try to match the exploits of the two toughest fighters at Furinkan, she would lose her nerve. So, she went on a "Morals Campaign" against perverts. Some of those who were coming into the infirmary were those Ranma had sent in earlier that day.

So, it was a different Ranma Saotome, the barefooted red-headed and pigtailed stranger, that returned to Class 1-F. She didn't strut; she had short legs, so she took short steps. She didn't have broad shoulders; she kept her slender ones slumped. She didn't slouch; she had a proud chest, so she kept her bust raised. She didn't keep her stomach in; she let her belly arch outward, reflecting the S-shape of her back. She didn't have a hard, male butt; she pushed her plump ass out. Didn't girls wiggle as they walk, as well as jiggle? That was a lot to remember to do at one time! She was sure to neglect a few and have to return to doing them, but that was how a martial artist learned. Well, an ordinary martial artist. Once she got a technique down, she was sure to excel in it. She told herself to think of doing the girl postures and moves as practice katas.

She at once drew the attention of the boys. No, wait. Her training in reading people, which she usually chose to ignore in non-combat situations because of the overload, told her they weren't interested in how she presented herself. The _horndogs_ were interested in her boobs, butt and other woman parts. (Quite a number was interested in her accursed _cute_ face! Argh!)

No, those who really noticed the details she was bringing into her girl act were _girls!_ There were frowns, most of them trying to be kept hidden, but a few outright. There was also envy. Even fear. These were not friendly vibes. Her experiment in girly-girlyhood would have to be dropped.

Or did it? As she tried to concentrate on what the English teacher was saying in a foreign language she did not know well, information from her now more relaxed trained senses reached her consciousness. The girls still had those negative emotions about the way she was acting, but stronger were the actions that they were very little aware of, directed by their subconsciouses. And what were they? Practically the same as the guys. They were interested in her boobs, her butt, and her other female parts. (And her _cute_ face!)

Ranma was getting thoroughly confused. Was she in a class full of girls who _liked_ girls? Gay, no, lesbians, she thought they were called. Or, like Nabiki said Akane and Ranma were now accused of being, bisexual? Guys did _not_ check out guys like these _girls_ were checking out her. If she was to fit in, was this something she had to do to girls, too? Was there a special technique? It did seem more subtle than the blatant ogling of the boys. Especially _boys_ like Hiroshi and Daisuke.

She became fidgety in her chair. All the attention was bothering her crotch. But was it from -No, it _couldn't_ be caused by the boys'! It had to be from the girls, right!? Right?!

[][][]

And the lunch bell rang. It wasn't nice enough to eat outside. It might even rain, but if it did, all she had to worry about was her uniform getting wet. She already was a girl. The class would be eating inside the classroom today.

Hiroshi and Daisuke were the first to get near her. "We have the really hard to get concert tickets! Want to come, Ranma-chan?"

"My friends can call me Ranma-chan. I'm Saotome-san."

"That means rice-paddy-girl, doesn't it!?" Daisuke said.

"You hafta remind me? It's like predestination or somethin'."

"Anyway, Saotome-san, about the tickets-"

"What are the tickets? _Which_ concert?" Akane broke in.

"Uh, well, what concert would you like to go to?" Hiroshi struggled to keep up his bluff.

"The "really hard to get tickets for" concert?" Saotome-san reminded him. She then dug the knife in, "I choose the one in Osaka."

"You have beautiful, big, blue eyes," Daisuke veered to a different approach.

"I like them as much as I like the red hair. Next!"

"My name is Sato, Saotome-san! I'm with the chemistry club, and-"

"Are you related to Megumi Sato?" Saotome-san frowned.

Akane told him, "No! But he can be just as destructive with his bombs! Come on, Ranma, join the girls. We'll protect you from the perverts and losers." This was exactly what Ranma wanted to hear! She happily got away from the boys.

"Wow, Chiho, I can't believe you have a boyfriend that works making bentos!" Yuka said, marveling at the little puppy that was made out of anchovies and rice, surrounded by other compartments of bite-sized goodies. All Ranma noticed, though was - ugh! - the anchovies.

"Too bad Kasumi thinks you are too old for that sort of kitsch, Akane," Sayuri said.

"She made some _adorable_ presentations!" Yuka said.

"I'm not into adorable. Too many seem to think _I_ look adorable." Ranma said sourly, as she reached into her bookbag for the bento box Kasumi had made for her. But when she opened it, her eyes widened. And she slammed the lid back down on it.

"What?! What?! Oo! Kasumi made you a _special_ bento!" Yuka said excitedly.

"No, she didn't!" Ranma said, twisting this way and that to keep the box away from her and Sayuri.

It was Akane who grabbed it away from her. That was all that she had to do to know. "No, my sister didn't," she said, opening the box. Barely a grain or two of rice remained. "Ranma couldn't wait until lunch."

Ranma's belly growled. "Being a martial artist burns a lot of calories!"

"Especially after the morning you've had," Akane said. She sighed, fought her better judgment and said, "Hiroshi."

"You're _right_ , Akane," Sayuri said, making a face. "Hiroshi always brings extra food."

Ranma understood. She made warding signs with her fingers. Her belly argued otherwise.

[][][]

She blamed it on her life on the road, not knowing when, where, or if she would eat next. Her appetite won out over her need for friendship. "H,h,helo, H,H,Hiroshi." Gah!

A great, sloppy smile came over his face. "Saotome-san! You coming with me to the concert?!"

"C,can I sit with you?"

"Yes! Yes, you can!" And he got up and pushed a desk (where Daisuke had been sitting at) next to his own and then stole a chair just as somebody was getting up from it. Now she could sit right next to him, their bodies inches from one another. Ranma-chan Saotome-san forced herself to do it.

Ranma sat like a girl not because she was thinking to, but because she didn't want her skirt-exposed knee bumping up against a guy's leg. On both sides. Another guy had just happened to have moved his chair too close for Ranma to let her legs fall comfortably apart like she was in a habit of doing as the guy.

"Have you finished lunch?" The school clock said there were 10 minutes left of lunchtime.

"Oh, do you want to share my lunch, Saotome-san?"

"Uh, um, Ranma." But she made it clear it was "Not Ranma-chan!"

"I don't believe in old-fashioned bento. I do American!" And he opened his take-out bag from MoDonald's. Reaching in, he asked, "Do you like french fries?"

"How about a hamburger?"

But he brought out the bag of french fries. And then tried to hand-feed her them, one by one.

Ranma looked over at Akane and the girls. She was rolling her eyes, and the others were giggling. Sayuri looked straight at her. "Say " _cheese_ -burger"." Yuka added, "Yeah, with lots of gooey, cheesy goodness!"

Ranma was a martial artist. With one flick of her pinkie, she could knock Hiroshi off his chair and take the food. But, again, something was reinforcing his vow to act honorably. She definitely, absolutely did not want to end up like his idiot, thieving pop! Ranma opened her mouth and let the french fry be eased in past her girl lips. It was good if a little salty and greasy for her tastes. But it was definitely good enough to eat. Another followed. And another before she had finished the last. A fourth followed. The fifth-

"Get your lips away from mine!" Hiroshi had the other end of the fry in his own mouth.

"Cheap trick," Akane informed Ranma. And she remembered what her friend had told her about Hiroshi and Daisuke yesterday on their way home from the clinic.

Ranma looked at the clock. She looked at the hamburger. She looked at Hiroshi. Hiroshi, like so many Japanese, had a thing for the cute. And, for him, cute girls especially. The Redhead was definitely the cutest girl he had ever met. Maybe even MOE. Against his better judgment, he gave her the hamburger with everything

It was gone in a flash. And so was Saotome-san. "Don't I even get a thank you kiss?"

Feeling like she could have been a thief, not having paid for what she ate, Ranma appealed to the girls' judgments again. There was smiles, shrugs, and Akane. She managed to look neutral. "Remember what you told me and Dr, Tofu in the infirmary."

Okay? What would the girl I feel like do? Cringing a bit, Ranma-chan blew a kiss. And she did it in a most _adorable_ way. Unintentionally. _Right?_

[][][]

Ranma's trained senses told her she was getting a lot of attention from Hiroshi. (And his best friend, Daisuke.) A guy she had 'kissed' was paying her intense attention. It was something she did not want to think about. She tried her hardest to listen to the teacher and read the lesson book. She even took notes. (Not that she'd be able to read most of them, what with her terrible handwriting.)

Then she was saved by PE. She would be able to escape from Hiroshi, Daisuke and the rest of the boys and be just with the girls. With her athletic abilities, she was out of the door way before anybody else.

She was first in the girls' locker room. It turned her stomach to see all the damage she had done to it yesterday. But she was told since Furinkan specialized in sports as martial arts, they had a budget for repairs. There was already spackling covering some of the cracks and most of the fist-sized metal locker doors were another matter.

Trying to put that nightmare out of her mind, she unbuttoned her blouse past the jumper bib and reached in deep past her boobs. Fishing out the purple, satin panties, she brought them out and was almost caught putting them on. Instead, as the other girls entered, she pretended she was just taking them off. She twirled them around her finger before letting them go into a locker without a door.

Her ears burned when she overheard whispers commenting on her wearing such slutty panties to school.

" _Listen_ , all of you!" Megumi's voice echoed. "I know slutty. Those _aren't_ slutty! Anybody have a problem with Ranma, come to me!"

"And I know the grapevine," Ayane said. " _I'll_ find out what you say behind Ranma's back."

Yasushi came right to the point. "She sent the Hentai Horde to the infirmary."

"No!" Akane stepped in. "Treat Ranma like a _girl_! She _needs_ the practice! She was raised thinking she was a boy! You'll _only_ make things worse for her and everybody else if she can't learn how to be a proper woman!"

"That's a threat," was Yasushi's interpretation.

The others went about undressing and putting on their gym clothes. For the most part, Ranma was "ignored". But she knew she was still the center of their attentions. Fighting her misery, she went to change into her own bloomers and t-shirt. Pssts, whispers and soft whistles came when she revealed she wasn't wearing a bra over the largest boobs in the school. Her nipples hardened at the attention.

And they stayed hard, poking out from beneath her cotton t-shirt. At least the fact that she was a natural redhead was completely hidden from them and, soon, everybody else - especially the boys!

She took her frustration out to the PE baseball game. She would have preferred to have had the position with the most action. But she was more a hand-to-hand combat rather than one more dependent on projectiles. She wouldn't have made the best pitcher, anyway. And she craved to be the best. That also left out fielding. She was best at being in mid-air, not other things being there. The two things she was best at in baseball were hitting and being the catcher. She could stay in one position for a long time without it bothering her and she could take the blow of fastballs striking her mitt. If the pitch went wild, her speed and agility allowed her to reach it as long as it came even somewhat close to her.

As the luck of the draw would have it, Akane was on the other team. She hit a home run that nearly left the long, wide sports field. And she did it without looking macho, tomboy, or whatever you call an overly-guyish girl. That was how Ranma wanted to do her homers.

She never had the chance. While she was in helmet, facemask, padding, shin guards and mitt, she suddenly caught a bouquet of red roses.

"Romantic," Yasushi said.

"You're crazy!" Akane told her. "And Kuno must have gone totally insane this time!"

"Nay, not insane. Unless the pursuit of love itself is insanity," Kuno came onto the field speaking into a microphone connected to the PA system. Everybody could hear him! "Remember, Akane, I did begin my campaign for my date with you by winning the attendance-required, debating contest!"

"He came in second," Ayane informed Ranma.

"This time, I dare say, my panache has outdone even that event!"

"I ain't gonna date with you!" Ranma's arm was drawn back ready to hit the idiot among idiots hard enough with the thorny bouquet to send him back to the infirmary. But, again, something prevented her returning the "gift". What was going on?!

"It be not a date I desire from you."

"Romance and sex," Yasushi said.

"Kuno, you PERVERT!" Akane screamed as her bat was replaced by a large, large mallet.


	3. Chapter 5 Courting Ranma

An unusual disclaimer: Ranma ½ is a trademark of Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ Communications, and its characters have been borrowed without permission. And Son Turned Daughter was originally written in 2002 by the FanFiction author Tangent, and his characters Megumi, Yasushi and Ayane have, likewise, been borrowed without permission. Please see the first two chapters under _his_ pen name. This story is written for non-commercial purposes only.

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Seeing a mallet magically appear in Akane's hands, a baseball came from nowhere into the hand of the game's pitcher. Megumi threw the ball harder than any before!

But, even knowing she should, she couldn't bring herself to bean Kuno. The ball went wild!

Ranma threw off her catcher's mask and helmet and leaped!

And landed in Kuno's arms. Well, only because the utterly surprised samurai had the microphone lifted in one hand and the little redhead had reached between her bare thighs to pull the other up within holding range. "Oh, Senpai!" she said caressing his face with her catcher's mitt.

For once in his life, the debate champion was at a loss for words. Here was a girl throwing herself at him in her gym clothes, kneepads, and chest protector.

Akane wasn't at a loss: "Ranma! Get away from that pervert!" All she needed was a clean shot to bean Kuno with her mallet. Maybe if she got behind him.

Ranma-chan hugged Kuno even closer with the hand she had on his back. "Are you a pervert, Senpai?" her soprano voice and big, blue eyes asked.

"Uh, uhh -Of course, not! A Kuno is always a gentleman. We _are_ nobility, after all."

"Yea!" and she pressed the chest protector against the bare skin that Kuno's kendo-gi exposed. Underneath her boobs were squeezed. "Then you won't hurt me?"

"Hurt you!? Perish the thought…." Kuno's desire to appear perfect finally met up with his male desires. Hadn't he wanted to fight this waif whose bare thigh he was supporting?

Meanwhile, Akane _did_ want to hurt Kuno! She raised her mallet and-

Megumi snatched it away from her. It was the tall, muscular girl who now raised the hammer. "I won't miss Kuno _this_ time!"

Only, it turned out, it was _only_ Akane's hammer to wield. It disappeared the same way as it came. The sudden loss of the weight threw Megumi's balance off and she fell face down onto the grass, The mallet reappeared in Akane's hand.

"Remember Nabiki's plan," Yasushi said.

Akane screamed in frustration as she let the hammer go, and it went back to nowhere.

"I never dated before, Senpai. My pop don't want me to." Yeah, the jerk wanted her, that was, _him_ , to go straight into marriage!

"That is a tragedy to all the male population! Mayhap, I should have negotiations with your father."

"Would you!? That would make me so happy!" Yeah, happy to see the idiot suffer more for registering his son as a daughter at school!

"Then that is indeed what I shall do! You have my word as a-" Even on the ground, Megumi couldn't miss Kuno with her baseball at a range this close.

[][][]

Like magic, the spectators on the sports field weren't interested in Megumi's baseballs or Akane's hammer. No, it was Kuno and the redhead that received all the talk and speculation. She had taken away his thunder by keeping the mike away from his big mouth. But the Fury of Furinkan had done it by acting like a kitten. Which was the _real_ Ranma-chan Saotome-san? Hey, her classmates would tell others, they should have seen how she had begun acting so girly! The girl raised as a boy _wanted_ to learn how to be a girl! She had even had lunch with Hiroshi, of all people! Yes, just her and him, _boy-girl!_ … And as information got mixed with speculation that became rumor, the redhead's reputation was starting to move in, uh, 'interesting' directions.

"Aw, don't worry, Akane!" Ranma said as they left the girls' locker room back in their school uniforms.

"Didn't you _hear_ what the girls were just asking you and saying about you?! They think you want to be Kuno's _girlfriend!_ It's an unwritten rule at Furinkan that _no_ girl talks to him if she can help it let alone _touch_ him!"

"I didn't touch him," she said confidently. "I had that mitt and chest protector on!"

"Really? What about here!" and she slapped a hand underneath Ranma's skirt and against the bare skin of the back of her thigh. "You _like_ a guy touching you there?!" Her friend's reaction showed that she didn't.

As long as she had her hand under Ranma's skirt, she raised her hand a couple of inches to make sure she was wearing Kasumi's panties this time. Her face grew red as she remembered how close Ranma's ass had been to Kuno's crotch.

Then she had another reason to be red. "Can't keep your hands off your " _friend_ "?" Ayane grinned.

"Ranma doesn't like guys touching her," Yasushi said.

"She touched Kuno," Megumi glared. "And not like Akane does."

"That's the _whole point!_ " Ranma yelled. "If fightin' him makes him want me more, I have to use the _opposite_ strategy!"

"So Akane should be like that to Kuno!"

"No! No! Absolutely not! I _won't_ do it!"

"We'll see what Nabiki says," Megumi put her nose close to Akane's. Their busts were almost touching.

"Megumi's tits are bigger than Akane's tits," Yasushi said.

[][][]

Two more periods were left for Ranma to get through for her first full day as a schoolgirl. As she entered classroom 1-F the boys suddenly went quiet. The girls' voices were lowered, thinking she couldn't hear them that way. They didn't approve of her "liking" Kuno. Some because they could outright not stand him. Others because _they_ wanted to be his girlfriend. Ranma was wondering why they just didn't go up and ask him to date them when she remembered Megumi and that horde of hentai. Furinkan specialized in martial artists of every kind that could be fit into a school curriculum. The girl that dated Kuno would be challenged by other competitive girls. But -Man! Geez! - there was no longer any doubt after this morning _who_ the champion girl was.

It wasn't fair! Ranma didn't want that elitist jerk! She just wanted friends - friends who were girls who acted like girls, not jerks like she could be when a guy. Girls could just act...nicer! They could comfort you and have you feeling less lonely and miserable. They did things that she barely remembered her own mom doing when she was a little boy.

Her trained senses became highly focused as she made her way to her desk. ...There! That girl! Her battle aura potential was strong! Stronger than even Megumi's, though not nearly as strong as Akane's. She may be able to take on other challengers for the right to date Kuno. Maybe she could invite her to the dojo and train her! Stupid, she might have her _own_ dojo!

When the math teacher was called out of the room, Ranma whispered her question to Akane. Akane whispered back, "Ikuko Kuonji."

"You girls talking about me?" Well, there was no doubt the ability of her senses.

"I don't want Kuno!" Ranma told her, and the class, out loud. "Do you?!"

"Ranma!" Akane realized what she was trying to do.

Ikuko gave the redhead a hard, steady look. "I'm president of the Truce Enforcement Club!"

"Truce Enforcement?"

Akane explained, "Ranma, they make sure the girls don't get involved in the stupid fights like the guys. They've asked me to be a member."

"Oh," said their "enemy number one".

[][][]

Ranma's head hurt, and it wasn't just from the math. Why did everything have to be complicated! Here she had thought she had the perfect strategy for getting rid of Kuno, but it meant making her the enemy of the very people she wanted desperately to be friends with, the girls! If she tried to be friendly with the boys as the girl, they were sure to want more than _just_ friendship. She knew. All the schools she had gone to were all-boys schools! And the adolescents in them _had_ prided themselves on being _All-Boy_. It wasn't fair!

The more she dwelled on it, the more she wanted to cry. She just might soon! How embarrassing would that be!

The bell rang, and Ranma immediately went to look for a place to hide her tears. Akane followed her. Wanting the only friend she thought she had left among the girls, the little redhead allowed her to catch up. Akane took her arm and escorted her to the girls' room. It was beginning to become a familiar place for the neo-girl. Not that she wouldn't rather go as a guy. So much easier and simpler.

"Akane!" she threw herself against her. "You know it isn't fair! I just want friends! _Girl_ friends, not boyfriends! And now all the girls _hate_ me!"

Akane heart nearly broke. Ranma was a boy, yet he, at least as a girl, was definitely _not_ a pervert. She was almost convinced she was _only_ a girl because of the lonely life she had had as a boy. Dr. Tofu's "prescription" may only be the excuse she needed to remain a girl. And, oh, there was also her wanting revenge against the evil Genma Saotome, her dad. It wasn't fair that Ranma was being branded with a false reputation. Of all people at the school, she, Akane Tendo, should know the burden of that! "Ranma, how flexible are you with the Code?"

[][][]

Ikuko Ito opened the door to the Truce Enforcement Club and two new members followed her inside.

In a room smaller than a classroom was just about as much exercise equipment as the space could hold. It was all padded as there were little floor space to take practice falls on. But, Ranma speculated, that was probably the point of the Kuonji school of martial arts. The two members of the Anything-Goes schools were not impressed.

"What is _she_ doing here?!" the next member to enter exclaimed. Akiko was told the answer would have to wait until the rest of the club showed up. "What is _she_ doing here" was also the first words out of Umeko and Emiko.

"What is _she_ doing here?!" were the first words out of Akane and Ranma's mouths on seeing Yasushi enter.

"I'm a spy," she said.

"But Megumi has to know you come to the club!"

"I'm her spy, too."

"Believe me, there's been less trouble since Yasushi joined us. At least, Megumi and her girls haven't physically fought any girls like they used to."

"No! They stoop to evil, underhanded tactics!" yelled their redheaded victim.

"Girl tactics," Yasushi said.

"Like it or not, the Truce Enforcement Club is only dedicated to keeping girls from fighting each other the same way as the guys fight each other," Ikuko told them.

"We have to not appear strong and unfeminine," Yasushi said.

"I was right!" Ranma turned on Akane. "You and the Doc said I shouldn't be all girly-girly!"

"I'll explain it later, Ranma! It's more complicated than that!"

"Is being a girl _always_ about complications!?"

"It's complicated about when it's not complicated," Yasushi said

"Ranma and Akane?" Miss Niouriki the girls' gym teacher said when she saw them.

"Niouriki-sensei, the Fabulous Five have now become the Magnificent Seven!" Ikuko said to the club's faculty advisor.

[][][]

After school and after the club, they were on their way back to the Tendo home.

"I'm happy I joined the club!" Ranma smiled. Miss Niouriki had been there when she needed comforting the most. She wasn't as old as her mother probably was (if she _was_ still alive), but she, hopefully, could make a substitute.

"I'm not happy!" Akane scowled. "We girls should be fighting the boys and enforcing a truce on _them!_ "

"You're the best fighter of the born-girls, Akane. Maybe you can become the leader of the club and change the rules."

"Yes! I think I might just do that! -And _you'll_ back me up!"

"I will?" Ranma hadn't yet decided what was the best way for her to practice being a girl. Girly-girly still meant the opposite of out-of-control, hormonal crazy to her. Still, as a martial artist, she had to get into _some_ battles to keep her skills sharp. The Code was alright with her having them with boys, but this morning's takedown of dozens of the best battlers in school told her she could be crazy with boys. Damaging crazy. So, if not them...

"I wanted to, _really_ wanted to, but I didn't, and haven't, fought Megumi. Maybe I can't fight girls, even when I'm a girl. Shampoo may've spooked me too bad!"

Akane's mind was stuck on one topic."Don't change the subject from boys to girls!" Akane told Ranma. "Think about boys! You might not even have to fight girls! Everybody at school knows they can't beat you!"

"Everybody but one," said Kuno as they rounded a corner. Ranma's fingers were up in a warding sign in surprise. "And, yes, my precocious minx, do, indeed, think about boys. This boy in particular." _Both_ hands became wards! "I do use the term loosely, as I am far more a man, than a-"

"Kuno go back to the school gate!" Akane told him. "You've never followed me home before! I don't want you to start doing it now!" Her fingers flexed, trying to find a mallet.

"But I was invited to be your guest by your houseguest, Ranma Saotome. Do you not remember what happened on the pitch of the diamond this very afternoon?"

"I remember not _fightin'_ you!" Ranma said. Nabiki lied! Kuno was only supposed to be interested in girls that fought! She made sure she didn't fight him! When she had the chance that morning all she did was step on his face and fight…. Oh. She wiped out dozens of guys. Geez! No good girl hormones!

"Of course you will not accept the challenge and the wager that comes with it, my inconsolate battle maiden. It is your very own sire that stands in your way. Since that be so, the first contest of our tournament has to be with your obstacle of a father! I sally forth to see that your honor is saved so that none may call you a coward."

"You just DID call me a coward!"

"Kuno, Ranma is _my_ houseguest in _my_ house! You cannot come without _my_ permission!" Akane told him.

"Then, may I have your permission?" he bowed.

"N-MmMFh!" Akane screamed into Ranma's hand.

"Call _me_ a coward?!" Ranma said with a crazed look in her eye. "I'm gonna do the bravest thing I ever did!"

[][][]

It was a long, long, long walk to the Tendos. The craze faded, and the need for bravery increased. That's why she kept covering the mouths of both Akane and Kuno. She could _not_ listen to being reminded she now belonged to Truce Enforcement. She knew it wouldn't take much to talk her out of what she was intending to do. But she actually had this fantasy flash through her while she was in the arms of Kuno earlier. Of course, she never thought she could or would _really_ go through with it. It was just one of those stupid things that pass through the brain as options are considered. Akane was thoroughly confused about what Ranma was doing. Kuno, of course, refused to recognize he was confused. He was so used to the condition.

When they came to the Tendo gate, it was Ranma's and Akane's turn to stand and confront Kuno. "You want a challenge!(?) Then this it, Kuno! I don't think you _can_ defeat my pop with that stick of yours! He's _my_ martial arts sensei! If you do lose, you lose your tournament, and will have to give up any idea of fighting me!"

"That's what you want!" Akane yelled.

"And pop willa won! I'm not letting that happen! I ain't _ready_ to forgive him! I've forgiven him too many times in my life! A life he's ruined!" Dr. Tofu would later confirm that the brand-new to girlhood let alone womanhood had, the last couple of days, been going through her first ever episode of PMS. Ranma would become convinced that was why the girl whose body she now had had drowned herself. "I want my revenge!"

"You are quite obviously a damsel in distress," Kuno said. "I do not acknowledge that any could be superior to I. I shall vanquish the Unforgivable-"

She reached up and put her hand back over his mouth again. Her short little body had to get closer to his than she'd have liked, again, but she still lacked the girl perspective that could have made this too disgusting to her. Or not. "The weapon you're gonna use is _this_ mouth of yours! You _do_ know how to talk to a girl like a guy that likes a girl talks, don'tya(!)?! That's a challenge, ya know!"

"But of course the suave and debonaire Kuno knows how to speak words of romance full of sweet nothings to the fairer sex! My poetic discourse rivals the Bard of Avon's own sonnets!"

"Whatever that means! Just say things like that in front of my Old Man. He won't understand it no better than I do, but he'll know you're comin' onto me! That's exactly what I want!"

"Cyrano Kuno accepts your challenge! And, what, pray tell, will be my reward for risking my health with sweet nothings? Amour is not armor."

"You're supposed to be a stupid fool!" Ranma let out her frustration. "Okay, okay! Kendo _is_ a martial art and you _do_ understand each opponent has to have a motive to fight to their best!" The redhead ground her teeth. She did _not_ want to say, "I'll go on a date with you."

"Ranma!?" Akane gasped.

"I won't be fightin' him! I have a _plan!_ "

"Then afterward, you will deign to do battle with me?"

"Probably during," Ranma muttered, angry with herself. Her plan had just _better_ work! Aaa!

[][][]

"Oh, my!" Kasumi said as she saw who entered her house.

"Gracious Lady, you are privileged to play hostess to the Lord of Nerima in your humble abode," Kuno bowed and reached out to kiss her hand. Kasumi remembered where her hand had last been and hurriedly cleaned it on her apron. "It is the French way from this Cyrano." And he kissed it.

"Oh, my. I thought your name was Tatewaki?"

"Enough drooling on my big sister, Kuno!" Akane cried.

"Bleah!" Ranma's tongue came out of her mouth. "Don't try that on me! No kissin' of no kind!"

"I look forward to when our tournament reaches that stage."

"It won't! You'll lose before _that_ happens! Kasumi, where's pop?!"

"The last I saw of him, he and father were playing shogi."

"Hey, Pop! Come out and meet the boy I brought home! He wants to talk to you about you lettin' him date me!"

"BWOAR!"

"Your father sounds like a wild animal," Kuno said, just before his eyes bulged at seeing a giant panda charging towards him on all fours!

Ranma leaped and landed on its back, straddling it beneath her school dress, and - it's teeth inches from Kuno - grabbed the beast's round, furry ears. "Stop! Anything-Goes to save this school dress! Now, are you gonna calm down, or do I hafta-"

The panda rose up on its hind legs! Kuno raised his bokken, ready to strike the monster.

"No!" Akane cried, getting the sides of the wooden sword between her hands. She matched her strength against the taller, more muscular, and male wielder.

"No, Pop! Bad panda! Bad!" the red-haired rider scolded, removing a hand from an ear to slap its sensitive, black, wet nose.

The creature ignored the pain and attempt at humiliation to advance on the boy who dared to want to date his son! Its long claws reached for the overly handsome face! Kuno lifted his weapon! The claws swiped!

Rip! "My dress!" Akane screamed! She swung from the bokken, intending to get to the ground and yank the damned stick from Kuno and use it to bash the heads of _both_ idiots! Instead, her feet managed to strike the critical male anatomy of both man and beast.

Both were bowed, defeated!

"Akane! That's really dirty fightin'! They weren't _really_ gonna kill each other!" Probably

[][][]

Ranma dragged the panda into the common room, and Akane dragged Kuno by the bokken the samurai refused to release.

"Our guest remains, I see," Mr. Tendo said, not bothering to get up from the block of wood with the shogi grid on top.

Ranma slammed the panda down on his friend's side of the table. "Okay, Pop, you gonna listen this way or do I hang you up by your ankles again!" And she pointed out to the tree with a tire propped up against it.

"Brr-ao, rrr! Snarl!" It showed its bear-like teeth but did not try to use them. Yet.

"You, too, Kuno!" Akane told him. "That tire out there came with a flat innertube! It will be hard for you to use your sword with that wrapped around your arms and tied into a knot!"

"Why does the fiery-haired girl call this beast her father?"

"Well, uh, that is…. Man! I wasn't thinkin' that far ahead!"

"You've, no doubt, heard and read the exploits of the legendary figures of Japanese folklore, like Momotaro?" Mr. Tendo spoke in a manner Kuno could relate to.

"Why, of course! This panda is one of Ranma's animal companions!" Kuno, of course, was an expert on Japanese folklore, believing most if not all of the stories. "There must be an interesting adventure behind her naming her mascot "Pop"."

"Hear, that, Pop?" Ranma said, casually leaning an elbow on its shoulder, "He called you _my_ mascot. You're just here to make _me_ look good."

"Braorr!" It brought its claws up, but then gave a grunt of pain, as the small girl used a pressure point against it. Her small hands became lost in the fur around its wrists. It was brute's strength against a young, short girl's strength...slowly the foreleg came down, threatening to defeat her…

She then swung it around into an armlock, that is, a foreleg-lock.

"She truly is the modern heir to those Japanese of legend!" Kuno said.

" _Ranma…!_ " Akane warned. It all seemed to be backfiring on her friend, big time!

But Ranma was too thirsty for revenge to hear, She said into her "animal companion's" ear, "You're gonna behave yourself. You're already in trouble for tearin' Akane's uniform!"

"And my nightie," Kasumi reported.

"That's it! You're gettin' a real job to pay for everythin'! No thievin' or freeloadin' Or do you want us to get all that money we can get sellin' you to a zoo or somethin'(!)?!"

The animal still protested in its beastly way!

"I wonder if bamboo is cheaper than rice and fish," Kasumi asked herself.

The panda became domesticated.

Ranma let go of its foreleg. "As much as I like seein' it this way, it ain't enough! I woulda had to go through stuff like this even if Kuno wasn't here! I want it to know - really _get!_ \- what takin' me off to China _did_ to me! -Kuno, the battle begins!"

"The battle? But it began with -You refer to the battle of words! Just so! I plight my case to your, uh, 'Pop' (such a humble name for such an exotic creature) for the right to figh-"

"Date! Date! You want to take me on a date!"

"That be my desire as well."

"Stop it, Pop! He don't mean that kind of "desire"." Then Ranma glared across the table at word boy. "You better not be!"

"As one of noble lineage, I must always observe the proprieties. Any desires must be expressed with all due decorum."

Akane rolled her eyes and said under her breath, "I'm glad Kuno believes in the heroic stories of samurais and not the immoralities in their history."

"See, Pop. I think that means a girl like me can trust her virtue with him. That is," and she leaned arms and boobs on the panda to be 'closer' to Kuno, "if she wants her virtue to be-Pppft! Sputter! Kasumi why're you sprayin' my face with cold water!"

"Oh, my, I'm sorrry, Ranma-chan. I read where you can humanely discipline pets and mascots by spraying them with plain water."

"That's the spray bottle you water your plants with, isn't it, Kasumi?" Akane said. "Will you let me use it?"

"Of course, Akane. I still have some chores to finish."

Looking at Akane looking back at her, Ranma could only think of a movie she had once actually got to see and its scene where the guy with the gun said, "Make my day".

"As I was saying," Kuno said. "As the heir to a noble name and estate of vast wealth, I am required to be chaste so as not to cast my worthy seed on unworthy fields. That is why I am very particular about the woman to whom I show an interest in courting. She must be only the worthiest of the worthy! A warrior that can, perhaps, come near to matching my own skills."

"I'm doomed," Ranma said.

"You're not the only one," Akane said.

"Do I detect signs of dejection? Nay, fear not. _Neither_ of you worthy battle maidens need feel the throes of rejection! For the House of Kuno maintains the ancient traditions of our Great Land of the Rising Sun! It is but a petty detail as to which would be my wife and which would be my concubine. That can be-Pppft! Sputter!"

"You're just _sprayin'_ him with water for sayin' that, Akane!?"

"You're right!"

The panda rolled on the tatami mats laughing as the two escorted their guest out of the house as fast as their feet could run. Outside, both girls sent him on his way.

Kuno didn't come down from the punt until he was over the canal. Splash! Then, more than just his face was wet with cold water.

[][][]

"I saw Kuno fly by," Nabiki said shortly afterward as she entered the common room. She saw her daddy and the panda still playing shogi.

"I'd rather not talk about it," her daddy said. "Stop laughing, Genma! This is serious! If that boy has his way, not only will I lose a daughter, I will lose the chance to unite our two schools!"

[If my daughter is a concubine, my son can still wed Kasumi or Nabiki.]

"Woah!" Nabiki said. "How long has the panda been able to do that?"

"Since that boy, Kuno-sama, left. He's been using the signs to taunt Ranma."

"What's his problem with Ranma, this time?"

[I have no problem with my son.]

"Details! Details! I have a contract to deliver Kuno to somebody else!"

[There can be more than one concubine.]

"Waah!" her daddy bawled. "Nabiki! Kasumi!"

"We're not concubines, yet, Daddy. I'm not getting anywhere here. Where's Akane and Ranma?"

"They're, they're *Sob!* in the bath room." The panda produced a sign with an arrow pointing the way.

"They're in there _together?_ "

Daddy buried his face in the crook of his arm. "Kuno made them feel *sob* dirty!"

"Kuno is filthy rich," Nabiki. "But it comes from laundered money. It's all a matter of how you look at things. I'm going to have a talk with those two-"

She saw Akane rounding the corner of the hall to the master bedroom, toilet and bath room. She was in her favorite after-school dress. Rounding the corner right behind her was Ranma. _He_ was in his Chinese pants and spare - now only - shirt.

"Well, well!" Nabiki smirked, "I see you're becoming _very_ good friends."

Get your mind out of the gutter, Nabiki," Akane told her. "We showered as girls."

"Oo, still both naked together."

"We have the same gym girls locker room," Ranma said, picking up on the tone Akane was giving her sister. "Me and she ain't got nothin' we ain't seen before." Of course, Ranma had only been seeing it for two weeks now. And most of the time he had clothes over it.

"But the hot water. I thought hot water was best for washing the grunge away?"

"I used the hot water _after_ I got my clothes on if that's what you talkin' about."

"And since Ranma couldn't use the furo, _I_ didn't, either!" Akane said. Their bond had become stronger by this show of solidarity.

"So you washed each other's nude bodies. Just how bisexual are you?"

"Nabiki!"

"Like you said, Akane, she's got warped values."

"And it's those values that are going to save you from becoming concubine and wife."

"Don't talk to me about things like that when I'm a guy!"

[My son, the concubine]

"Ignore the panda, Ranma," Akane said.

"What? Did Pop say somethin'? I can't hear him." Then the sign slammed into his face.

Another sign read, [Truth hurts].

"You still don't get it!" Ranma cried, reducing the sign that hit him to tinder wood. He still hadn't read it. But he certainly could guess. "This is _all_ your fault, Old Man! I wouldn't be rememberin' what it's like to be a girl with a guy's brain if it was not for you!"

"Ranma! Calm down. Please," Akane reached out to comfort him. But he backed away from her and wouldn't let her come within hugging range. This hurt her. "Ranma...we're in this together. It isn't that bad being a girl. I know."

"It ain't bad if you _stay_ a girl, maybe. But I don't! It's like the Doc says, a girl's body has a girl's brain, and a guy's body has a _guy's_ brain! My mind and memories are the same, but the two brains treat them two different ways! Each sees things differently!

"Worse! My girl brain is makin' memories that my guy brain is havin' trouble understandin'! Just like there are guy memories her brain can't deal with!"

Akane was at a loss for words. She tried to think of what it would be like to turn into a boy. What would that do to her perspective? How strange would her life as a girl seem to the male her? Not as strange as having to learn how to live life as a boy based on a girl's experience of boys, probably. No matter which sex she was, the other half of her life would be strange. Perhaps forever.

There was an uneasy silence between all four of them there - Well, three. The panda was using this opportunity to cheat at shogi.

"Hello, Dr. Tofu? No, this is not Bette. Bette is your skeleton, remember? No, I'm not Ranma, either, but that's why I'm calling. No, we're talking on the phone. Anyway, could you perhaps make a housecall? No, the house isn't talking."

[][][]

"But Father, I have everything I need from the market. And Akane, you have another uniform to change into. I'll repair the one Uncle Saotome ripped tomorrow. Nabiki, you are better at budgeting out household finances than I am. No, Ranma, I have no idea why they don't want me to be here when Dr. Tofu arrives."

"Why did you call a doctor, Kasumi, dear?" the now human Genma Saotome asked.

"Ranma told me yesterday evening about his visit with Dr. Tofu. It made me glad that I had decided to put my own opinion aside and help Ranma to pretend to be a girl. Only, it turns out after hearing what he has been telling us, Ranma is not pretending. He is a girl when he is a girl. He is just a girl with male memories."

"And girl memories when I'm a male."

"Which, as I understand it, do not prevent you from being a male. You will not start thinking like a girl. You need counseling to help you understand that. Dr. Tofu understood your situation as soon as he saw you. You should listen to his advice on-"

"Is this the clinic? It doesn't look like- I'm sorry, I must have entered the wrong door again. I'm looking for - Oh, Nabiki, could you tell me the way to your home?"

"Turn around and go one block to your right and down the hill."

"Nabiki! That is no way to treat the good doctor!" Kasumi said, rushing to greet him.

"Kasumi! Imagine meeting you here. Here is here, isn't it? My glasses are foggy."

"I'm 'sposed to take advice from him!? He sounded like he knew what he was talkin' about before. Stupid, Ranma, _real_ stupid!"

"No, Ranma," Akane said, on the edge of tears. "It's only around my big sister he acts this way. He's, he's in lo,lo…."

"Love? Man! The only thing I know about it is they make stupid movies and books about it. Maybe my girl brain can understand it. Not that my guy brain could even if she could."

"Let me clean your glasses for you on my apron…. There! Back on your -Oh, my, they're foggy again! How does that happen?"

"Why don't Kasumi see he's in love with her?"

"Denial!" And the tears came! Akane threw herself against Ranma's broad, strong chest. Ranma's arms went up, and he wished he could get away from crying girl. His memories of being the girl told him he should hug her and rub her back and do his best to comfort her. He had too many male inhibitions, still, to overcome to comfortably let that happen. He tried to touch her, but trying wasn't accomplishing. "She can't see his love until we, Nabiki and I, no longer need her to be our substitute mom. That has been her only life since our real mom died." Her legs gave out and she had to lower herself to the floor. Memories of her mom always weakened her.

"Aw, geez!" Ranma said, standing over her for a moment. Not knowing what else to do, he lowered himself so he'd at least be on her own level. "Kasumi can hear us, you know. Let's tell her the truth." It worked for him and Akane.

Akane shook her head and again tried to find comfort in arms that could not bring themselves to embrace her. "Denial is a very strong Tendo trait. We don't hear what we don't want to hear."

"Or, like you said, see," Ranma said, looking at Kasumi and the Doc.

"Dr. Tofu, Ranma needs counseling to assure him he'll always be a male in his thinking. And I'd like to sit in while you do it. Ranma needs to come to terms with his curse as quickly as possible. You're busy with your many patients, but he'll be living with me. Helping him will give me something more to do than just chores. And more important."

"So Ranma is your Little Sister! I mean, Little Brother!"

Kasumi giggled. "Ranma is both."

Denial. The boy that had been denied a mother for ten years suddenly saw somebody volunteer to be his substitute mother. And if he didn't grow up and become independent of her, Kasumi would never admit that Dr. Tofu loved her.


	4. Chapter 6 Girls' Night Out

An unusual disclaimer: Ranma ½ is a trademark of Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ Communications, and its characters have been borrowed without permission. And Son Turned Daughter was originally written in 2002 by the FanFiction author Tangent, and his characters Megumi, Yasushi and Ayane have, likewise, been borrowed without permission. Please see the first two chapters under _his_ pen name. This story is written for non-commercial purposes only.

[][][] [][][] [][][]

Akane and Ranma were making sure Dr. Tofu got home safely. He saw somebody he knew along the way. "Why, Bette, what a pleasant surprise meeting you here!"

"There's a skeleton doin' yoga in the middle of the street," said the still male Ranma.

"Uh, Dt. Tofu, perhaps you could show Bette home?" Akane said.

"We shouldn't disturb an ascetic's meditation."

"She shouldn't be in the middle of the street."

"What if a dog found her?"

'They did manage to convince the good man to carry her home, which just happened to be the clinic "apartment" beneath his own. It wasn't until she was hanging from her display stand that his sanity returned. "Where's Kasumi?"

"His glasses are startin' to fog up again."

"Don't think about my sister for now, Dr. Tofu. She'll be here too soon." Akane looked at Ranma. "But before she does, you _can_ help Ranma."

"I already told him it is my professional opinion as a physician and a martial artist that he practice being a girl as much as he's comfortable being."

"And I _have_ been! At school that's all they know me as, the girl! It's when I'm _outa_ school and a guy that have to hear that professional opinion of yours!"

Dr. Tofu's answer was a kata routine. "These are the moves you can make as a male. It accentuates your male physicality."

"Doctor Tofu! That's practically perverted!" Akane blushed.

"No, it's just accentuating the most male part of the anatomy. These are moves his cursed form cannot accomplish. But, Akane is correct. I'd be careful where you perform this kata, Ranma."

"Seems stupid, but I know some pretty stupid martial arts routines, thanks to my idiot pop."

"Oh, you know the Tiptoeing Frog? The Tumbling Turtle? The Kung Fu Panda?"

" ' don't know that last one. ' don't wanna know. ' don't want pop to be able to use it as a real panda!"

"Enough martial arts shoptalk! We don't have much time! The problem is Ranma knows, I think, or pretty sure he's always going to have a male brain when he _does_ have a male brain, but he's not sure he can deal with the _memories_ he has as a girl!"

"I'm think I'm havin' trouble with understandin' my guy memories when I'm the girl, too. I ain't sure, 'cuz I _can_ understand them when I'm a guy."

Dr, Tofu nodded. The diagnosis is correct. The brains of the two genders are required to be wired differently to carry out their biological destinies. For the female, it is to become a mother and raise her children to maturity. Depending on the woman, there can be considerable extension of her nurturing instincts to others not her own children."

Like Kasumi? Being denied a husband and children of her own was she reaching out for substitutes? From Ranma's limited experience with such things, he believed that most women Kasumi's age wanted to be already married and have a family. Of course, since Ranma couldn't relate this to tactical information on an opponent - How could _anybody_ think of Kasumi as an opponent? - he _was_ having difficulty understanding what the doc was talking about this time. Maybe his girl brain would, but would _his_?

"Then there is the means to having children to raise. Biologically, the female is the bottom to the man's top."

"No! That's sexist nonsense! Women do not have to be on the bottom!" Akane protested, her hand almost reaching for her invisible mallet.

"No, it is true. But biology depends on variation. There _are_ women who are better being tops and there are men who are better being bottoms. The question really comes down to compatibility. As long as one of a couple is top and the other is bottom, their relationship has a good chance of enduring. If they are both bottom and bottom or top and top …." He studied the couple before him. Akane got the implication. As for Ranma…

"So the best way to practice bein' a girl is to be like Kasumi?"

"Why aren't we talking about how Ranma could remain and be more of a man?!" Akane raised her voice. As a Tendo, she was going into denial. She didn't _want_ to hear how she could be a more stereotypically female!

"That is the context. Ranma has far more male memories than female memories. If he can learn the biological necessities that shape the female brain, then he will have a better chance to understand his girl half as both a male and a female. Now, his girl brain needs to understand that males are-"

"Hello, Dr. Tofu! I'm sorry I was delayed!"

"Frogs and snails and puppy-dog's tails, Especially wagging puppy dog tails. See this kata I've taught you?"

"Dr. Tofu, my sister is coming!" Seeing a spray bottle for watering plants, Akane picked it up.

[][][]

"Do we have to leave so soon?" Kasumi asked as Akane and the redhead in boys clothes gently forced her to leave the clinic.

"Yes, Big Sis, he, uh, has to see patients who, uh, had to be at work before now."

"Oh, my, yes! Dr. Tofu is a very dedicated healer. He's helping me study on how to become a nurse when nobody will need me at home."

"Nursing means bein' like a mother, don't it?" Ranma asked.

"There is more to it than that. And there is more to being a mother than simply having a job for eight or twelve hours or more certain days of the week. But there is a similarity, yes."

Ranma walked in silence for a while, thinking on something.

"Ranma, you're not planning something, are you? Remember what bringing home Kuno did!"

"No. The Doc said knowin' biology's gonna help me deal with havin' two brains. I'm just tryin' to remember the biology classes I had. I remember the frogs, but not the other stuff."

"What, may I ask?" Kasumi asked.

"Frogs and snails and puppy dog tails."

"That's what little boys are made of!" Kasumi smiled, completing the verse. "And girls are made of sugar and spice and everything-"

"No, Kasumi! Don't listen to her Ranma!"

"Girls are made of everything? Everything comes from females 'cuz they have…" Ranma suddenly felt sick to her belly.

"Nice! Alright, I said it: Nice! Being a girl isn't everything!"

"Being a girl is nice, Ranma. But you are also a boy," and Kasumi's hand took her far shoulder and pulled her to herself as they walked along. "Two halves make a whole."

"I'll never be whole."

[][][]

Arriving at the Tendos, Ranma thought about finding a place to be alone and think about things. But the girl brain wanted company. She had spent too much time alone as a guy. She had at least two people, Akane and Kasumi, who seemed to accept her for what she was, so she was going to take advantage of it before they, too, were snatched away from her. She followed "Big Sister" Kasumi like a little-

"What happened here!?" the redhead asked on seeing the common room. It was a mess! She would've thought one of her and her Old Man's brawl's had gotten completely out of hand if it weren't for the tire, innertube and the sturdiest branch from the tree strewn about.

"We, uh, we were having an argument," Mr. Tendo said.

"Soun accused me of cheating at shogi!" pop said pointing an accusing finger.

Nabiki was casually laying stomach down on the floor, a manga in front of her while she was watching TV. "They were trying to keep Kasumi from going to the clinic."

"Nabiki!"

"What? Isn't that right, Kasumi?"

"Now that I'm back home, I can clean up this mess."

Ranma stomach growled. Akane's joined it. Ranma volunteered, "Why don't I clean up here and you fix supper?"

"I'll help!" Akane raised her hand.

"Take my advice, Ranma, and don't let her, Ranma."

"I meant I'll help Kasumi make supper!"

"Let her help you, Ranma!"

"Please!" Mr. Tendo pleaded.

"Only if pop…. " Splash! "Aw, geez! Pandas can do housework, you know!"

[That's women's work]

[][][]

The heavy gates of the Tendo compound slammed behind them. "Let's carouse like we did in the good old days, Genma."

[How will we pay?]

"Pandas are always crowd pleasers."

[][][]

"I'll show that stupid Old Man!" Ranma said, rolling up further her already rolled up sleeves! "I'll be the best housekeeper there is! I'll make Kasumi proud of me!"

"You know you gave them just what they wanted," Nabiki said. "You do "women's work" while they get a boys' night out."

"Just like Big Sis," Akane confirmed.

Ranma frowned. "You're right! Aw, man! I'd like pop to hafta stay and see me be his idea of a woman."

"There'll be other times. Meanwhile, we have a male mess to clean up. Typical!" said Akane of the Truce Enforcement Club as she began by bending to pick up the heavy tree branch. "Why is there dirt on it?!"

"Male brains," Nabiki said. "They wanted the place to be, literally, dirty."

"I'm going to change into something I don't care gets dirty."

"Bet that she's going to get her dojo-gi?" Nabiki smirked. But Ranma wasn't listening.

"Kasumi, do you have an extra apron?"

"You'll still get your _only_ boy clothes dirty. Why not do it nude? There's only us girls here, now."

"So you can take pictures? No, thanks!"

Suddenly Nabiki had an inspiration! "Wait here! I'm going to check in my room."

Ranma really wasn't interested until he heard her singing, "Magic, magic, Ma~gic! Make my wish come true!"

Kasumi did have an apron Ranma could wear. But the redhead felt guilty about wearing it, it seemed too nice, clean and even pressed. It had to be a new one.

"Ranma! How much do you _really_ want to tick off your dad?" Nabiki said, coming back with a garment bag on a hanger. "I take photos of you wearing this and you can flash them in front of his muzzle anytime you'd like! I'll even make duplicates," her head nodded towards the claw-slashed tire and tree branch, and, then, from behind her back, she brought out the shredded purple negligee that Ranma had worn last night while she slept in the same room as the panda.

[][][]

Ranma returned from the bath room wearing the French maid's uniform.

"Wow! And it even fits!" Nabiki marveled. "Even with the bloating."

"Like Ranma was cursed to wear it! Take it off, Ranma!" Akane told her.

Ranma thought about it, tugging at the hem of a skirt so short her frilly panties would've shown if she weren't also wearing layers of little, frilly "slips". She bit her lip. "You promise nobody else's gonna see me like this?"

"Nobody at school, nobody in Nerima!" Nabiki held up her hand in a pledge, while holding the camera in the other. "Nobody will know your name. Nobody will know where you live."

"Ranma, don't trust her!" But Akane saw that look she saw on their way home from school. "Oh, no. This is another _Kuno_."

"This is the way I can punish Pop!" her eyes had that crazed look. "He'll see that even if - especially IF - he's not around I can be doin' girly-girly, womanly, female type stuff! He'll see part of the evidence and wonder what I'm not showin' him!"

"Kasumi!" Akane ran for back-up!

In the kitchen, Kasumi explained, "Though Ranma is sixteen, she's so new to being a woman, it's like she's just beginning puberty. Her womanly impulses are pushing her to test the boundaries of her sexuality."

"Her _what!?_ "

"Now, Akane. We don't _know_ Ranma will act on them to actually be _made a woman_. Overhearing Father and Uncle Saotome talk, the male Ranma has been strictly raised to believe that sex drains a warrior's ki energy. He is a virgin and he wants to stay that way as long as he can. But…."

"But he has a girl's brain now!"

Kasumi bit her lip. But she went back to preparing the sukiyaki. "She needs to discover her boundaries. Just as you, Nabiki, and I did."

[][][]

"You're not wearing the fishnet hose!"

"And I ain't gonna! The only thing I want on my legs are my pants!"

"What about the high heels?"

"They're _not_ indoor shoes! And I'd get those dirty doin' this kinda housework! I don't mind if this stupid uniform gets dirty or ruined!"

"At least, stand on your tiptoes as if your _were_ wearing heels!"

"Don't push it, Nabiki. At least I'm dressed like, like -Ugh! I must be goin' crazy!" Ranma immediately started in on cleaning and straightening the common room. She needed to direct her raging energies somewhere!

The first to go was the branch almost half the size of its tree trunk. It landed against that trunk on the other side of the garden yard. The large, slashed tire fell on the rocks that lined the koi pond. The innertube got thrown under the crawlspace of the house for possible future use. Click. Click.

"Nabiki!" Akane cried, coming into the room,

Just raising from getting it under the porch, Ranma swung her head around. She realized then that all of her frill-covered ass was available for Nabiki's camera. She had no real feminine modesty, yet, but there was something about guys and other guys staring at their butts that made her pivot around. Click. Click.

"Nabiki!"

What now!? She was still basically bent over and her boobs were threatening to spill out of the short upstairs, too, neckline.

Calling on a show of dignity, she rose straight and as tall as a girl 5'2" could, hands on her hips, feet apart. Click. Click.

There was no 'Nabiki!' So why the clicking?

"There are different poses for different markets. _Your_ target demographic is your dad, Ranma. We have to have you looking like you enjoy behaving as a girl."

So, Nabiki had to content herself with photos that were rather boring without the viewer knowing that a boy lurked inside that petite, bombshell body, Not that she would pass up any opportunity for more explicit shots. Besides, she knew that Ranma was now on the slippery slope to gravure pictures. With a little work and more magic, she could make Ranma into an idol.

[][][]

The photo session ended early! Everybody was forced to run out the open shoji doors to the garden because of the dirt storm raised by Akane trying to sweep what had been deposited by the two fathers out of the house.

"That dirt's made the room _more_ of a mess!" Ranma cried in frustration. She didn't care at all how much of it covered her once clean, new French maid's uniform.. Of course, it also was on every part of her that wasn't covered. Her. Nabiki. Akane. Kasumi.

"*Cough*Cough* Supper is ruined, I'm afraid," Kasumi announced. Stomachs rumbled.

"I'm sorry," Akane both wanted to cry and yell at herself.

"Getting clean in the bath room is probably out, too. I bet the dirt's spread all the way down the hall." frowned Nabiki.

"I'm sorry, I said!" She was ready to both cry and yell at anybody. The redhead saw that her friend needed comforting and stepped up to her to hold her. Bust to bust. No bisexuality implied. Yet.

"Cute. Because of Akane's crime, you're sharing grime." Even Kasumi didn't think Nabiki's remark was tolerable. "Okay! Okay! In honor of the establishment of Nabiki Studios, I'm treating us all to a public bath and a vending machine meal!"

"I can't go nowhere lookin' like this!" Ranma said, her filthy hands fluffing out the hem of her short 'slips' and skirt out.

"And I'm wearing my dojo-gi!" dirty everywhere Akane added.

The mostly smudged Kasumi sighed, "There are clothes on the drying poles around the corner. But what are a few more things to wash. I'm sure all those in the utility room have to be re-laundered as well."

[][][]

Nabiki and Kasumi got to wear clothes that belonged to them. Akane had to settle with one of Kasumi's skirts and Nabiki's halter top and midriff-stopping pullover. The skirt was too tight and the top was too loose. So tight and loose that, as long as she wasn't out in public, she would tug the bottom out and pull the top up. As for Ranma…

"Can't say I like the design of this kimono, but it's okay if I'm a girl." There were times and places in Japan where men still wore kimonos. She had the vague memory of seeing Nabiki wearing this particular one on the day she first met her. -Hey, that was right! "When you wore this you couldn't stop poking my boobs! Just how bisexual are?!"

Instead of answering her, Nabiki asked, "Kasumi, how to you launder silk?"

"I hand wash it in cold water."

"See, Ranma? Silk and that redhair go together." Click. Click.

She also got shots of the redhead washing her feet in the cold water of the pond. ("As I said") Ranma was the only one allowed to open the front door, reach out and get their outdoor shoes from the genkan.

[][][]

Besides kimonos, Ranma also had no problem wearing getas, especially since they were just her size. She was glad the thongs on little wooden stilts were in the Tendo genkan, since Nabiki's kimono was a little too long for her short legs. She couldn't wear them when she wore Western-style clothes, though. Of course, girls could wear high heels…

She hadn't had much practice in getas, and her thinking wasn't on how to walk in them correctly. She broke one of the straps. "Oh, man!" Annoying. She looked and saw she hadn't wandered too far behind the others. She picked up the useless geta and started hopping after them. Before she could speak, somebody else did.

"I see you need help, Miss." It was a shaggy-haired boy about her own age with yellow bandana on his head and rough, durable traveling-clothes. He was less dirty than she was. "Let me."

"I don't need you help! If you think I'm gonna-" The boy took off the bandana - there was somehow another, identical one beneath it - and tore a piece off. Aw, man! Why he have to do that! A gift! She seemed obligated to accept gifts.

After repairing the thong. He smiled. But it wasn't a smile of a guy coming on to her. Maybe. "Could you tell me how to get to Nerima, Japan. I overheard somebody I...knew was moving there."

"You are in Nerima."

"I am! That's wonderful! Bye! Now, I just have to find out what high school he goes to!"

"There's only one high school in Nerima: Furinkan!"

"Furinkan?! Thank you, again, Miss! You've been so helpful!"

The Tendo sisters had lingered to watch the scene. "It's like something out of those stories that begin with a boy helping a girl with her broken geta." Kasumi smiled.

"Yeah, corny stories. Guys don't do that any more."

"That boy did," Akane pointed out. "He seems traditional and, maybe, nice."

"Aw! What do I care! I ain't interested in no guys!" He did seem nice, though. Maybe she wouldn't mind meeting him again. He didn't seem interested in dating her. Maybe they could even be _just_ friends.

[][][]

The public bath was unlike any she was familiar with! It was like a marble palace with painted murals, the biggest being one of Mt. Fuji above a sea of clouds in back of a hot, soaking pool able to hold dozens of people and a high wall dividing the female from the male sides.

"Aw, man! Which side do I choose?"

"Here's a hint, Ranma," Nabiki said, "Fench maid."

"You're right. I can't be in public when I have deal with that memory. So, I don't get to relax and soak in hot water. All I can have is a yet another cold shower again."

"Look out for steam," Akane reminded her. " _You_ might use cold, but other women don't."

Going in through the women's door, Ranma stopped and did the warding sign. "What is it?!" asked Akane.

"Nude women!"

"And what else did you expect to see in a public bath as a girl?" Nabiki smrked.

"But, but, but…. They're not high school girls!" She was struggling to get used to seeing those undressed in the gym locker room.

"Oh, my. I think I understand." And Kasumi gently took her by the hand and led her. "Ranma, you need to see the reality of being a woman."

Even in the locker room, the neo-girl was forced to see fat, saggy women, thin, saggy women, one that wasn't saggy because because she was very pregnant, two that were too thin, and boobs in all shapes and sizes. The most unattractive ones had hair down there, but even some of those were bald like the others. And as for what their slits did not hide….

"Ranma? Ranma?! Are you there?!" Akane asked. Oh, no! Was the boy in her friend discovering he was a pervert?!

"Oh, saggy! But that one's boobs aren't saggy, yet-" Akane slapped her hand over Ranma's mouth. Here eyes appealed to her big sister.

"We'll talk about the realities of being a woman at home, not in public," Kasumi said. "Save your questions for then. Just take all this in for referral."

[][][]

Nabiki found it hard to believe she was embarrassed at Ranma seeing her nude. No, not nude. She was feeling naked around the girl-who-was/would-be-a-guy. She had a reputation to maintain. She just hoped Ranma was so naive she didn't pick up on the meaning of the signs.

Ranma was too overwhelmed and too busy reining in her trained senses to consciously notice how red the middle sister's skin was or how low the color was. She, too, was blushing but it was better hidden by techniques she had learned on how to be loose for combat. She had no doubt that if these nude women found out she was man there would be combat. They probably wouldn't suspect because she couldn't bring herself to look at most of their not-cute bodies for very long.

But they could her! Just like the girls at school, they all checked her body out. She had to remember to ask Kasumi about that. Are women naturally bisexual?

"Here, Ranma, Akane and I will sit on either side of you while you shower," Kasumi said. "That way you're less likely to be accidentally struck by hot water."

"Accidentally!" Akane half-teased, raising her showerhead. She still wasn't certain if Ranma was turning into a pervert. Her eyes were too furtive.

Ranma nodded, feeling more relaxed on looking on a nude Akane than any other woman. They had not only shared a gym locker room together, they had only over an hour ago showered together in the Tendo bath room. She definitely didn't have anything Ranma hadn't seen before. And she wasn't perverted enough to think about those two places where she actually hadn't. Not yet, at least.

As for Kasumi…. Ranma had to, she just _had_ to! she told herself. The eldest Tendo girl had accepted Ranma calling her Big Sister. It wouldn't be respectful not to look at her when she had no clothes on. It could be considered rude since in Japan women bathed openly with women. Japan had the hot tub well before the Westerners stole the idea. The ancient tradition of soaking in a furo was tied in with being sociable and polite. House guests were invited to join their host family members of the same sex in the tub. When he was a guy, she wouldn't think anything of showering and soaking with other guys. Well, maybe. She'd have to see.

So, the little redhead steeled her nerves and turned her head, hopefully casually. Big Sister had a film of soap on her perfect skin. It made her seem so shiny! Every part of her was accented by shadows, light and lighter, and sheen, bright and brighter. It gave an impression of unreality to her. She was better than real life. She had a heightened reality that made her seem almost ethereal. Kasumi turned to look at her, Ranma, the "Little Siste/Brother". Was that a big, globe, light fixture behind her head or a halo?

Ranma's eyes retreated, bringing her eyes down to her (own) naked body. There was some filmy sheen to her skin but that was a lie. There seemed to be far more lather. And the cold water was making her skin goosebump, as well as make her boobs and nipples feel tighter. At least they weren't sagging. Yet. Sagging? Ranma opened her legs. Down there, below her naturally red hair color, was she-

"Ranma!"

"What?" Ranma asked, not thinking she was being told to closer her legs. "How long before the girl me gets saggy?"

"Ranma!" Akane yelled and forced both legs to shut. She was more embarrassed that other women heard, and saw, than the neo-girl was.

[][][]

They didn't stay long after that. Though Nabiki tried to talk them into going into the pool. She was paying for their trip to the public bath and she wanted to get her money's worth. But it wasn't too difficult for her sisters to convince her it wasn't safe for Ranma to be left unattended in a large room full of naked, large women.

Now it was time for them to eat. First of all was the milk that so many Japanese drank with their bath. Which was strange, considering the great majority were lactose intolerant. But this public bath had lactose free alternatives to the hard-to-digest stuff.

Ranma, in her kimono and getas, did the ritual, "Thank you very much", before forcing the stuff down.

"You don't like milk?" Akane asked.

"I had to eat and drink all sorts of stuff I didn't like livin' on the road for ten years. I can take it." And she drank the rest in one long gulp. It was a wonder her short mouth could hold so much at one time. And when finished, "Bleah!"

"How do you like ice cream, Ranma?" Kasumi asked.

"It tastes better than milk." But not by much. "We had to eat what we carried in our travel packs. Ice cream melts, so we never bothered eatin' it most of the time."

"Then it will be may treat...Little Sister," Kasumi said.

[][][]

Nerima still had a fairly prosperous, traditional, market street. But the stall Kasumi wanted to go had its roll-up door down and locked. Many stalls were ending up shuttered all over Japan. "Oh, my! And they had my favorite ice cream, chai."

"Tea ice cream?" Ranma struggled not to show her distaste at Big Sister's tastes.

"There's the Sanzenin Ice Cream Emporium not too far away," Akane said. "Only it's on the pricey side."

Click. Click.

"This is my treat, Nabiki. I have mad money saved up, and this is the first time in a long time I felt like going mad."

[][][]

As they entered the relatively narrow but elegant looking restaurant one of the ice cream colored, wrought iron chairs beside a matching table, a blonde boy was finishing up putting on his roller blade. The older version of him behind the display case yelled, "Mikado, don't be late! I don't care what you think of her - She's rich!"

"Why must the wealthy be insane?" he grumbled as he picked up his ice skates from the table and rolled his way past the Tendo and Friend party.

"Welcome! What flavor would delight you young, beautiful women the most?!" the proprietor said.

"Do you have chai?"

"No, I'm sorry. I don't. I can get you some tea bags."

"No. I never have tea from teabags. Now...what are the other choices."

"Ginger! Everybody loves ginger ice cream! No? How about you, Red?"

"I can't make up my mind." She'd wait and see what Big Sister had. She could tolerate anything.

"Shaved ice, menthol, for me," Nabiki said.

"You're right, they do have menthol," Akane said. The she smirked, "Won't eat ice cream because you're on a diet?"

"I'm developing a reputation for being an Ice Queen." Akane wasn't sure if Nabiki was kidding or not. Maybe not, as she actually accepted her order.

"Let's see," Akane said, scanning the selection. "I'll take everything!"

" _You're_ not on a diet," Nabiki smirked.

"No," she pointed to the menu on the wall, "they serve parfaits!"

"Parfaits?" Ranma looked to see the different kinds of ice cream and fruit and granola, et cetera, available in one serving. "If there's one kind of eatin' i like is everything!"

"Parfaits are more expensive," Nabiki the household budget-keeper reminded.

"Then parfaits it is for my Little Sisters!"

"Not me," Nabiki said, sitting down with her menthol shaved ice. "I am on a diet," she said, playing it cool.

[][][]

"That was delicious!" Ranma grinned as they came out of the ice cream restaurant. "The next time I eat ice cream it's gonna be parfaits! Every flavor of everything I can afford!"

Click. Click.

Ranma ignored Nabiki. "But I don't think I can eat it as a guy. What made it really special was havin' you guys there eatin' yours with me! I ain't never had no company like that! It made me…."

"We understand," Big Sister said, holding her hand as Little Sister Three fought back the tears.

Ranma tried to speak, but knew she couldn't without bawling.

Akane tried to help her. "Where to now?"

"Home?" Kasumi suggested.

"Nabiki said she has more than just milk money!" Akane said.

"I wouldn't be spending any of it if you hadn't tried to do housework!"

"No! No, don't fight!" Ranma cried and ran! "You're spoilin' everything!"

[][][]

She was blinded by her tears The geta-clopping, kimono girl didn't know where she was going and only her trained senses kept her from running into people and things. Finally she could no longer find the drive to run, and had to just sit down and hang her head and cry.

"Uh, could you maybe get off of me?" a weak boy's voice said beneath her butt.

"Who?" the redhead wiped at her tears and finally rose. The most she could see of him at first was the grey martial arts gi he wore. No, not another fighter! She was in no mood!

"Thank you, miss. I'm sorry I'm not moving, but my horse threw me again. I'll be alright if I'm given enough time to heal."

"But you're layin' practically in the middle of the street."

"People think I'm just one of the drunks that lie sleeping in the streets all over Japan."

"Would you like something to drink?" Come to think of it, that sounded like a good idea. Too bad the legal drinking age was 20.

"I'm not allowed to drink anything but tea."

Ranma laughed in a sudden mood swing, "How about melted chai ice cream?"

"No. Only traditional tea."

[][][]

Ranma found it hard to believe he would meet a more pathetic martial artist. She would meet somebody more pathetic, but he wouldn't be a martial artist. She was feeling pretty pathetic herself. She had to find her Tendo "Sisters". They were probably on their way home.

"Come one *hic*, come all! She the ffantashtic trained panda!"

Okay, she was wrong. Here were _two_ pathetic martial artists.

"You whoould almosht think it was Kung Fu Panda itshelff!"

"Bleah! What poor form! It can barely stand up on two legs!"

"Rahhn,ma!"

"Look! A little woman can tip it over!" And she did and it rolled onto its back.

Soun looked at the handful of bystanders looking on, with three more stopping now that a cute girl in a kimono had gotten into the act. "Wha,aht do you ekshpect. It'sh jusht a panda!"

"Just a panda? Panda's are worth lots and lots of yen! What is my bid for this attractive bear-cat rug?!"

[Don't do this, Son!]

"Ah,ha! See? It ain't "just a panda"! It's the most valuable panda in the whole world! What other panda can write?!" She half-twisted to say to it, "You're son ain't doin' this to you."

"None of my customers got that kinda loot, kid! Get away from my booze wagon! You're keeping away the business!"

"You stupid sot funnel! Look! They're coming to see me! Everybody likes to look at a cute girl! And I'm the cutest! Especially in this kimono!" And she started doing an impromptu, traditional geisha dance she had seen a few times at village festivals. "Remember this one, Pop?"

"You're the one that's stupid, you ditz! You attract them, but unless you stay, they won't stay! In the meantime, they're blocking traffic and keeping real customers from ordering!"

"Too bad," and she gave him the evil-eye-with-tongue.

The booze wagon owner nudged one of his customers. The salaryman smiled and called out, "Say, you do that dance pretty damn well. Do you know the song?"

"Of course!" And Ranma opened her mouth to sing. The Master of Booze Wagon Martial Arts sprayed the beer from shook bottle after shook bottle straight into her mouth.


	5. Chapter 7 Lysistrata

An unusual disclaimer: Ranma ½ is a trademark of Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ Communications, and its characters have been borrowed without permission. And Son Turned Daughter was originally written in 2002 by the FanFiction author Tangent, and his characters Megumi, Yasushi and Ayane have, likewise, been borrowed without permission. Please see the first two chapters under _his_ pen name. This story is written for non-commercial purposes only.

[][][] [][][] [][][]

Too much beer entering her at a time triggered Ranma's gag reflex. She coughed, hacked, gushed and spit most out. But what wasn't going out left a way for more coming in. The Booze Wagon Martial Artist had the experience to know when to shoot the streams of alcohol past those full, young lips that wasted the minimum of his inventory. And he was using the strongest of the cheapest booze. Then the youngster finally recovered from her surprise enough to do something about recovering from nearly drowning, she bent over. That's when the proprietor proved he was a _real_ master of his art! He ricocheted shot glasses of sake off the ground and into the mouth that still needed to be gasping!

"That'sh enoughh!" Soun Tendo put himself into the warning posture of the martial artist! But it was merely the preparatory stance as the world was still too unsteady for him to risk moving too quickly. In fact, he might fall over without moving.

A panda sign came up and he was able to steady himself by holding onto it. "Bwawr!"

"What?" he looked down to the ground where his white-and-black friend was lying. He finally thought to read the sign. [Let the _girl_ get drunk!] Soun did not argue. He sat down beside the girl's father and waited.

Only having had ceremonial wine, rice and grape, in her young life, Ranma had no accumulated resistance. So the lesson was wasted on her about how with the smaller body, the quicker it could become drunk. And then, as a woman she had, pound for pound, ironically for Ranma, less body water.

The little woman began to see the world as Soun was seeing it. And she _knew_ it! "That'sh a dirty trick!" she said, raising her hands to take on her opponent. She wasn't too drunk to attack!

"Think you're a martial artist, do you!? Well, so do I, Missy! You challenge me, and you're gonna have to pay up for losing!"

"I ain't losht yet! - *Glug~nng, nng!*" Lodged far back of her mouth, she found a small bottle. After hitting the beginning of her throat, the force of the throw sent most of its whiskey down into her. Getting her small hand in her mouth, she pulled the bottle out, but not before swallowing most of the hard liquor. There was just a little of the booze left inside. An empty shot glass came up and hit the bottle it such a way that the remaining contents went up the redhead's nose.

"You lost!"

"Ran-, I never looshesh!" She wasn't so drunk as to give her real name. She didn't want them to find out she was a guy when they heard people talking about her male form. Okay, she was drunk. People who knew her in Nerima knew him as a her.

"Okay, you didn't lose. Come over here and be my hostess and you can tell all my customers that!"

"Right! I whill! But I won't drink!"

"I don't want you to! You cost me enough money!"

Stumbling forward on her geta stilts, the little woman in the kimono had to practically climb up onto one of the stools that were attached to the wagon. Sitting up, she had to hold onto the edge of the counter to keep from toppling off, her head was so light and fuzzy.

"So, your name is Ran(?)," said the salaryman who had asked her to sing

"Ranm-Ah! Yes! My name is Ran." the redhead thought being called by a perfectly good girl-name was a good idea at the moment. It protected her male identity.

"My name is Sashi."

"You know I didn't loosh, rhight, Shashi!? ' didnt loosh."

"No, you didn't. Tell me all about it," he said, leaning forward and placing his hand on her knee.

She placed her warm, silky hand on his - and pressure-pointed his wrist. "I never loosh, 'member that!"

"Hey! Don't go treating my customers like that!" The proprietor looked at the dozen onlookers. "Which of you got a question for my bargirl, Ran?!"

"How'sh it fheel to be treated like a gir,girl?" Soun read the panda's sign.

"It feelsh pretty nische. I had ah whonderfhul time until-"

"I want a real customer to talk to her!"

"You're a friend of Akane, aren't you?" asked a boy who reminded Ranma of Dr. Tofu's Bette.

"You're too young! Get lost!" The emaciated boy was too emasculated to protest. He took his onmyo doll and left.

"You serve tropical drinks? Sometin' with pineapple?" asked a middle-aged man whose topknot was supported by a tiny palm tree.

"I'll make you a Poorman's Mai Tai, rum and orange juice."

Ranma found herself between the salaryman and the older man in a Hawaiian shirt. The first was looking at her bust. The second was looking at her pigtail. "What keiki doin' in place like dis? Iz school tomorrow."

"I can play hooky if I whanna. I'm ushe to not bein' in school," she frowned glumly at her history.

"Ha, ha! Iz same for da Big Kahuna! Me on me way to da Paradise Island!" He had big, very white teeth.

"I've got a ticket to Hawaii, too. My vacation time is coming up and it'd be good if…" said the salaryman as he snuck his hand over to the small of the girl's back.

Her hand slid up his suit sleeve to his elbow- "Whatdya think you're doin'?!" she demanded, swinging her head around just as the tan guy was about to sheer off her pigtail!

"Iz no regulation haircut!"

The salaryman challenged him, "How _dare_ you try to take away her cute hairdo!' And he pulled her close to him for her own 'protection'. "It'd be like cutting a work of art!"

"You're the work of art! Get your hands off me!" But as she was moving to make her move, the topnut guy was back to trying to cut off her pigtail! She had to keep the braid away from him and her eye on him as she dealt with the other. It should have been no problem, but the younger man in the suit was an expert at retreating, feinting, and advancing with his hands. He was so good at using his hands, for a second there, she thought she felt eight hands on her! She was glad she had a kimono on. It left no exposed skin below the neck. Okay, she would have to kick him!

He was almost as good at "playing footsie" as he was fondling.

"Dat what keiki be gettin' for illegal drinkin'! Betta lesson be in school, no? Maybe me no longa play hooky and go to school and put wahini keiki on report!" And all the while, his shears went snip! snip!

Ranma had had more than enough! First taking the shears away, she next took the edge of the counter and she propelled herself to around and around on the pivoting stool. While making the shears go snip, snip for protection, she used her present emotional state to embued the pigtail she was slapping against both their faces with the force of a small whip. She spun so fast that-

The stool seat flew off its stand and sent her flying. Sober, now, she managed to land on her feet. The impact, though, splintered her getas and broke its thong straps. She growled!

Her bare feet stomped back to the booze wagon. She wanted - wanted badly! - to do bodily injury to all three of the grown men who did _not_ act like real men! But they were civilians, weak according to the standards of the Code she lived by. Maybe the booze seller wasn't, technically. He claimed to be a martial artist. He definitely had techniques she was vulnerable to.

She stomped away, "Don't leave!", "Keiki need me counselin'!", "Hey! You didn't make good for all the booze you drank!" Ranma turned around.

She parted her kimono. "You guys interested in seein' this naked leg?" They were. She raised her beautiful legs so they could see her - kick the back of the booze wagon! It jarred it so hard all three men had to hold onto something to keep from falling. Their mistake. The Fury of Furinkan had damaged the brake and the wagon was sent rolling down the hill it had been parked on!

She didn't bother seeing what happened to it next. But after half a minute there was a satisfying crash. She did pause to look at the snoring panda and only _male_ Tendo. The redhead stomped away from them, thinking no good thoughts about males.

[][][]

Ranma went back to the Tendo house with the long kimono pulled up away from her feet. The few men, and even women, that saw her had to look at her legs (as well as her other parts). She didn't understand why they would: She had seen girls in dresses that had shown much more of their legs. It was a relief to be back where she could be in boxers or panties and get less of a reaction. Or, maybe, that was just the way she wished it was like.

As she opened the door, she remembered all the dirt that would have to be cleaned up. When she had gotten their outdoor shoes earlier she saw that it had gotten as far as the upstairs stairway.

And now there was none. All of the dirt on the floor and walls and rails was gone. All that remained was the centuries-old grime that had originally been on the house.

"Hello, Little Sister, I'm glad you made it home safely," Kasumi was there to greet her. She was in a floral nightie that wasn't see-through like her purple one had been (before her no-good Old Man had destroyed it so his _son_ couldn't wear it again!), "I have a hot kettle waiting for you."

"Uh, um, no. I don't think I wanna be a guy just yet."

"That bad, Little Brother? You're going to have to face up to your girl memories sooner or later."

Ranma frowned. She was right. But she wasn't a champion at denial like Kasumi was with Dr. Tofu. "I won't be able to get to sleep thinkin' about them. I was reminded by a guy I met tonight," _Argh!_ "Tomorrow's a school day."

"Alright, Ranma. When you're ready, I am here."

Ranma brightened. "I met pop and your dad! I get to sleep by myself tonight! I can wear whatever I want!"

"I have no more sheer nighties, Little Sister,"

She grinned. "Why the bother? I can sleep nude."

"I recommend you at least wear panties." Then she thought of something. "You're going to have to have panties for school tomorrow. You can wear a pair of mine that are almost brand new. But we're going to have to go shopping to get you your own panties. And other lingerie, as well, I think."

"The panties are okay. ' don't know about the other stuff. Maybe."

"But first, you have to get that stink of alcohol off of you. Go take a shower before bed." Kasumi knew her Little Sister would tell her what had happened when she was ready. She was a good girl.

And so they parted for a while. No one made any comment about the missing dirt. Like magic, though remembered, it had disappeared as a topic of interest, just as Megumi's baseballs and Akane's hammer had. The only one that seemed immune was the one who had disbelieved in magic the most.

[][][]

"Kasumi!" Ranma hurried downstairs very early in the morning. Akane heard her and followed in jogging shorts and sports bra, her sweater still in her hand. She went to the kitchen where her friend had gone.

"Look!" the little redhead said, pulling up the hem of her school dress. "These aren't the panties I went to sleep in!" Instead of the plain, white but satiny ones Kasumi had loaned her, there were ones that were green and lacey with a see-through panel over the crotch.

"Oh, my! I've never seen those in the laundry."

"Nabiki! It had to have been her!" Akane said, frowning. The frown deepened when she remembered, "She also had the frilly, ridiculous little maid's uniform she had you wear yesterday!"

"Why would she give me panties for no reason?" Then it was Ranma's turn to frown. "Pictures! She somehow put them on me when I was asleep and took pictures of me wearing them!"

"What else were you wearing, Ranma?" Akane asked.

"Nothin' else."

"Topless!? Nabiki took picture of you in just panties and topless!?"

"Little Sister had wanted to sleep nude," Kasumi said.

"She just _may_ have!" Akane was getting enraged. "She had to have taken your first pair off to get those second pair on!"

"Oh, my!"

[][][]

All three of them entered Nabiki's room, Ranma first. "Nabiki!" she cried, sounding a lot like Akane's use of the name.

Nabiki tried to roll over. "Not now. I had a late night."

Akane wouldn't let her. She yanked her back onto her back. "You took pictures of Ranma - Naked!"

"They're over there on the vanity." And she tried to get one last snooze.

Kasumi picked them up. "Oh, my." But as she went through them, "There are no nudes, here."

"Because I didn't take any."

" _Why_ not?!" Akane demanded.

"You want me to take nude shots?"

"No!"

"Oh, my!" Kasumi exclaimed again. Ranma stood next to her and looked. "They're of you in that French maid's outfit, Little Sister."

Ranma was very glad she wasn't Little Brother right then. There her cursed body was in a dress that left most of her legs uncovered and half of her boobs, made all the worse by the contrasting white frills against the black of the dress and the (lots of) peach of her skin. It did have an apron, but one that she hoped to never see Big Sister in. And yet, yet…. "What do you think, Big Sister?"

"It doesn't really suit your cute body, Little Sister. It's for a more outright sexy woman."

"Yeah. Those are the words I was lookin' for."

"Oh, you want the magic girl, kawaii look(?)" Nabiki said.

"No! Never! Don't you even think about nothin' that cutesie!" And Ranma went to tear up the photos. And couldn't. Again, something was preventing her from robbing or destroying somebody else's property unless physically (or her physicality was) provoked. Now, if she could get Nabiki to physically provoke her…

[][][]

When Ranma and Akane went into the common room to wait for breakfast, they saw the walls covered with duplicates of the Ranma, the French Maid, photos. Ranma and Akane frowned and growled, "Nabiki!"

Then Ranma started laughing. It went on for longer than she thought it should. Akane joined in but was glad when they could stop. "I wish I could be home when Pop sees these!"

"It'll probably be good if you weren't."

"Ha! You're right. The longer I'm gone, the longer he has to fume. Kasumi, can we eat soon?"

[][][]

Nabiki came down in her school uniform to find Ranma and Akane already eating. She sat down at her usual spot on the floor in front of the table, setting down her camera. While still eating, Akane's other hand casually brought out a mallet and smashed the camera.

Nabiki glared at them. Was about to say something to them. Saw they were purposely ignoring her. And decided there was only one thing she could do. She brought out another camera.

Smash! A second hammer joined the first on the floor beside Akane.

"You know my camera is part of my plan to give Kuno to Megumi, don't you?"

"Maybe Megumi will let you take pictures like these of her," Kasumi suggested as she came in with Nabiki's breakfast.

"Maybe you can sneak into her bedroom at night and take pictures of her topless and in green panties," Ranma suggested.

"If I could get photos like that of Akane, she'd let me."

"Nabiki!" the other three girls said.

"This is becoming a running gag."

"What?"

"Never mind. It's only for those who can be amused."

[][][]

Whether they liked it or not, Nabiki again walked to school with them. "What about Kikuko and Ryonami? Shouldn't you be there supervising your Vulcan Enterprises, Ltd?" Akane said, hoping she would go ahead of them.

"Vulcan Enterprises?"

"She thinks she's so logical!"

"I am. Compared to everybody else I meet in Nerima. But, lately, I've found a reason to welcome illogic into my life. As long as I can treat it logically, it seems to work."

"Realy? Is that why you're helping Megumi get Kuno? Wouldn't having your _sister_ dating him bring you more money?"

"I don't blackmail family. Much. Megumi, on the other hand, is ripe with blackmail potential. How do you think the Truce Enforcement Club is able to keep her under control?"

"Man, Nabiki! Remind me to never do anythin' you can blackmail me with!"

"Are you family yet?" she grinned.

"She's a friend! Of _both_ your sisters, me _and_ Kasumi!"

"And I'm the son of the friend of your dad!"

"But not the daughter."

[][][]

Megumi, Ayane and Yasushi were waiting at the same place they waited yesterday. Ayane held up a onmyo straw doll. "Look what I took away from what's-his-name, the thin, creepy, little guy who plays with dolls like this."

"He's a guy that plays with dolls? Dolls are for girls. But I ain't never seen a girl play with one like that."

"You don't know about onmyo dolls? Do you know anything about voodoo, Ranma? No?"

"Well, are you going to tell us, Nabiki?!"

"You don't know either, Akane?! Onmyo is part of Japanese history! There used to be a whole government agency devoted to the study of magic."

"Okay. That's history."

"And I'm too busy learnin' about martial arts to have time for magic."

Nabiki's mouth threatened to drop open. She turned her gaze to the others. They seemed as uninterested as Ranma and Akane. Was the magic keeping its power hidden from everybody? That could make things very _interesting_ for her.

"Whatever," Ayane said. "The guy dropped this and I got it before he could get it back. I threatened to stick it with sharp objects unless he told me some gossip. And did he _ever!_ "

"He had very juicy gossip," Yasushi said.

The tall Megumi walked up to the short Ranma. "You're more of a party girl than I gave you credit for."

"What'd'you mean?"

"Do you girls know your houseguest was out drinking all night?" Ayane told them.

"Ranma?!" Akane turned to her.

"So, that's why you disappeared," Nabiki smirked.

"It's not like that! It didn't happen that way! You gotta believe me! It's all my pop's fault again!"

"Did he _force_ you to drink?" Ayane pressed for even worse gossip.

"It was the guy sellin' the booze! He knows the martial art of _makin'_ somebody drink! I didn't buy the drinks!"

"You had other men buy the drinks for you," Yasushi said.

"They did not!"

Megumi put her hand on top of the little redhead's shoulder. "I had hopes for you. But, like you said to everybody, you were raised to believe you were a boy. You're not used to getting things out of men just because you're a girl. I can teach you."

"Wow," Akane exhaled. "Nabiki was right about Megumi."

[][][]

Ranma wasn't paired up with Ayane again for their block long, long walk to the school gate. The gossip had enough to satisfy her for now. No, it was Megumi who wanted to be seen as the Fury of Furinkan's best friend.

Unlike yesterday, it was Kuno's turn to hide - that is, if he had survived Ranma's and Akane's punt of yesterday - and the Hentai Horde's turn to challenge.

They were in for a surprise: It was Megumi that charged into them! She brought down half a dozen and half of a half a dozen more, nine or ten of the best sports martial artists the school had to offer. But no more fell as she herself was finally defeated. Now, it was their chance with their _real_ opponents, Akane and the new girl, Raging Red!

But, again(!), they had to face somebody else first. "Guys! Yoohoo, listen to me!" Nabiki waved for their attentions. "I have important news for you! I really do, so you had better hear what I have to say!" And she took an arm of Ranma and Akane. "These are the two new members of the Truce Enforcement Club!"

"What?!"

"Pass the word back to half-deaf boy back there - And _every_ boy! Now, let the battle begin!" And she let go of their arms and stepped back.

As Akane and Ranma took their stances, the crowd of boys melted away.

"What?" Ranma looked at Akane. Akane looked away from the boys, to her friend, then to her sister,

"Come on," Nabiki said, taking their arms again to get them through the school gate.

"Aa! I hate the Truce Enforcement Club!" Ayane groaned.

"All they want is peace," Yasushi said.

"Nabiki?"

"Notice the question mark. This time it's not part of a running gag.

[][][]

In homeroom time, the president of the club was ready to confront them. "I heard you were drinking last night," Ikuko confronted them.

"Don't believe gossip!" Ranma cried in frustration.

"Ranma's a good girl, Ikuko! If you want me as a member, you have to take Ranma!"

Ikuko's frowned lessened. "You're on probation." She turned to go to her school desk.

Koyama-sensei and the school bell rang before Akane or Ranma could question Ikuko. He was paying attention during homeroom and then insisted on giving them no break before he moved straight into his subject. While he droned on about Japanese history during the Heian period, Akane tried passing notes to Ikuko. The Enforcer refused to compromise her integrity and accept them. The teacher ignored the notes piling up.

Until he was finished with his lesson. "You know, written ideographs were considered very important in Onmyodo." And he picked up one of the notes. "This is in Hiragana. Being largely phonetic, it would not be considered of any magical use. Romanji, even less." He read it, nodded, and returned it to its pile.

Of course, he was nowhere near to becoming as much of an expert on Jusenkyo magic as a certain bob-haired girl. The less she was contaminated by thoughts of other forms of magic, the better it would be for the head of Vulcan Enterprises, Ltd. A real challenge for somebody who liked to study up on all the possible angles of a situation.

[][][]

They met Ikuko between classes in the girls restroom.

"I'm surprised you don't know how the Truce Enforcement Club works, Akane," Ikuko said. "Well, maybe not. You've been so busy fighting, we couldn't really trust you. We believe in peace, you obviously didn't. We asked you to be a member for the same reason we have Yasushi as one. We hoped we could help you tame your masculine traits. We still do." She looked at Ranma. "And since "Wild Horse" thinks she's a stallion and not a mare, the same applies to our raised-boy girl."

Ranma twitched at the thought, then realized, yes, that was what _she_ wanted. When she was the guy, the would probably be another matter. "Tell us already, why those guys that're always fightin' Akane suddenly surrendered?"

"Lysistrata. I see you've never heard of that woman of legend. She rallied the women of an ancient city to get their men to stop fighting by going on strike. They had nothing to do with any man who continued their overly masculine ways. The Truce Enforcement Club has been working over several school years to unite the girls in this project. We have just gotten to the point where the worst of the worst know they cannot go on any dates with us if they do anything wrong to a girl."

"Girls?! Just girls!? We girls should be banding together to keep them from fighting each other too!" Akane's zeal was showing.

"That _was_ the point of the legend. But we haven't reached that point, yet. You, Akane, and now, you, Ranma, were two of the biggest obstacles remaining."

"I wouldn't have been fighting them if I _knew!"_

"But you hate boys."

"Of course I hate boys! They're jerks!"

"They are jerks, but you can't go on strike if you don't do it first."

"What?" Akane said, stepping back, bumping into Ranma. Ranma looked over her shoulder and said, "Are you sayin' what I think you're sayin'?!"

Ikuko nodded.

[][][]

"This stinks! Really stinks! I ain't gonna do it!" Ranma told Akane as soon as they reached the Truce Enforcement clubroom, minutes later.

"If I do it, you have to do it! Challenge!"

"Why do you have to do it?! Let's just quite the stupid club!"

"Then that horde of hentai will be back! I understand now why they kept attacking me! They were frozen out of dating the girls! I was one of the few options left to them! And, if you quit, they'll need to attack you, too!"

"They don't _need_ to attack any girl!"

"Teenage boys have _needs!_ "

"When I'm a teenage boy, I don't got needs!"

"Quiet!" Akane said, closing the club room's door. They had lucked out and had gotten a free period where they didn't have to be in class 1-F. "Like always, Ranma, you're the exception. But boys, the perverts(!), have needs and those needs would make them attack the girls if the girls hadn't banded together to protect each other!

"That's why it's so important that the club makes sure the girls don't fight each other. That is stage one of their plan. That's why they said they only cared if girls fight girls. They hadn't reached the stage where they could try and get guys from fighting guys. First things first."

There was no real room to pace in the clubroom. Instead, Ranma saw a mitt at the end of a steel arm and hit it. The meter on the machine went all the way to red, just short of the force it would take to break it. "I ain't gonna date no guy with needs! A guy with needs attacks girls! That kinda guy ain't got no honor!" And she came closer to breaking the machine. "I had enough of those needs at the booze wagon! And they weren't teenage boys!" BREAK!

"If you're going to practice being a girl, you have to go through what, what…." Akane collapsed to the floor. "Oh, goodness, no! No!" She buried her face in her hands. Ranma dropped the steel arm and went to her. Feeling her touch, she looked up at her with bleary eyes. "I need to practice being a girl, too."

[][][]

Megumi belonged to a different classroom and had to wait until both of their PE time to talk with them again. The two from the Anything-Goes schools saw that while she had healing techniques, they were slower than their own. The black eye was the most noticeable, but there were bruises her face, too. Ranma was put off. Didn't girls want to be attractive? They shouldn't fight if that was important to them. She knew the list of reasons why most people weren't martial artists, and especially those of her caliber.

"Ikuko and her girls read Yasushi the riot act."

"I can take it," Yasushi said.

"I broke the truce fighting like that."

"Four guys have asked her for a date," Yasushi said.

"And if she does go on a date?" Akane asked.

"She can't tell you," Ayabe said. "And now that you're part of the Truce Enforcement, uh,..."

"Ikuko sold Megumi's school record to Nabiki," Yasushi said.

"What Megumi did, you did, too, Yasushi!"

"Almost."

"Ikuko will do anything to keep her peace," Megumi growled.

"Anything?" Ranma squeaked.

"Anything goes," said Yasushi.

[][][]

Ranma was getting used to seeing Megumi's bare boobs. They reminded her of the heads of torpedoes. She had even seen detonator tips that seemed like her nipples. "You dojo daughters shouldn't buy into the club's ideas any more than you have to," Megumi said, putting her gym bra on."I mean, fighting makes a guy more of a guy! He's got all these chemicals in him that he has to burn off! It's like that with all male animals!"

"The strongest get the harem," Yasushi said.

"You wouldn't mind bein' a concubine?"

"Kuno's is the perfect boy for you, after all!" Akane said in an "it'd serve her right" tone.

Megumi thought about it as she pulled on her t-shirt. "As long as I can be the top girl! No!"

"She's already the top girl with Ayane and me," Yasushi said.

"Didn't the Doc say something like that yesterday?" Ranma tried to remember.

"Don't listen to her!" Akane cried. "Please, Ranma! You're better than that!"

Ranma looked at her friend. Was she her friend? Could they remain friends? Could Ranma be the bottom to Akane's top? Would the girl her be the bottom of Akane, but the guy him be the top? Ranma didn't know because she only vaguely remembered what the Doc told him.

[][][]

There is something about magic that goes unnoticed. People have their doubts about it if not outright disbelief because they fail to notice it. Magic, as they say, is everywhere, you just have to think to look for it. And once you do, ironically, it becomes familiar and so not worth commenting on it. From there it is easy to be forgotten. Does that make sense? Magic doesn't have to make sense.

The girls that a couple of days ago had teased Ranma so, literally, unmercifully about not wearing panties, and the next day had snickered and made innuendos about the purple, satin panties she had borrowed from Kasumi's negligee, this day were critiquing her green, sexy panties as if they had been invited to a lingerie show. The consensus was it was too sexy for school, but as long as only they, the girls, saw them, it was acceptable. They told her that she shouldn't keep wearing lingerie like that or the rumors that were forming around her might stick. But at least they gave the raised-boy credit for trying to be a girl. She just needed to learn where the middle was from the extremes.

And, oh, yes, Ranma should consider wearing bras.

"They don't like looking at your naked, big boobs," said Yasushi.

If it would help her fit in, maybe.

And then the girls moved on. The sexy panties were no longer a topic they needed to dwell on.

[][][]

Baseball wasn't the game of this day. It was basketball. Sports being so important to Furinkan, there were more than a couple of courts. Lots were drawn and the girls were to use those outside. Even then, only ten girls could play at any one time and the rest had to wait their turn. When it came Ranma's turn, she wanted to be the center.

"You're the shortest girl here," Niouriki-sensei said.

"In the whole school!" Ranma said it before anybody else could."But my martial arts school specializes in mid-air techniques. May I? Okay? Okay!" She took the ball and did a standing leap that had her land, feet-first on top of the backboard. She could look down and see how impressed everybody was. Well, mostly everybody. Akane definitely wasn't. What!? Was it because she was showing off?! Well, showing off was a part of his and probably her nature! She would show her!

With a small hand barely able to keep hold of the ball, she lifted her short arm as high as it would go. Demonstrating her complete confidence, she didn't even bother looking down at the basket below her. She knew her aim was perfect. And she dropped the ball. It did not go swish.

It went bounce! It bounced off her boobs and landed outside of the Three-Point Line and then the sideline.

Her audience broke out in laughter.

Mortified, Ranma dropped to her knees, riding the edge of the backboard, her hands also holding on. Her big boobs were practically in her face. She could hardly see the basket. She didn't want to see Akane. Akane was laughing…. No, she was just smiling. Ranma smiled back,

Ranma laughed along with the other girls!

And, of course, something had to spoil one of her perfect girl moments. And, of course, the way this day had been going, it had to be a boy. This boy had a name she knew. Kuno.

At least, she thought it was Kuno. He had on a kendo-gi and a wooden sword. But the mummy could have been any tall, well-built boy with hair like Kuno's. Akane thought it was him, too. "Kuno! This is girls' PE! Boys are not welcome! _Again!_ " And her hand sought a mallet she seemed to have misplaced.

"Nay, this is but the first day, the hour, almost to the minute, of the anniversary of when the legendary battle maiden, Ranma, welcomed me into her heart!"

"I WHAT!?" and the legendary lass did a sitting leap to land inches from the samurai idiot. If she were taller, she would have met him nose to nose. As it was, she was so close, the boobs that were still bouncing and jiggling did those against his kendo-gi. "Liar!"

"But you did." His smile was hidden beneath the bandages. "You did confess to me that the only reason you did not date with me was that of your monster of a "Pop". You then invited me to the Tendo hovel…" the gathered girls all went "Oo~oo!" at this piece of news. "so that I might set you free to meet with me and not in secret rendezvous.

"You pledged yourself to me if I but confront the fearsome creature. Which I did and succeeded, of course! I heard no objection from that Pop of yours that I could not date you."

Ranma screamed her frustration. Her hormones raged! She was ready to send the jerk back to whatever hospital he had come from. But the samurai simpleton would just bounce back like her boobs bounced. It would be years before they sagged, and she didn't want Kuno to take that long to sag! _Not_ fighting remained her best option! But that meant, that meant….

"I'm gonna be dating somebody else - A Guy!"

"What?! Who!" And Kuno raised his bokken, ready to strike his rival.

"I don't know yet! The Truce Enforcement Club is raffling off me and Akane! And guess _what?!_ "

It was Akane who got to deliver the coup de grace! "Only those who've _never fought me_ can enter!"

[][][] [][][] [][][] [][][] [][][]

 _ **Note:**_ As _theo25_ , I published, in 2004, a story titled, " **Nabiki, Lingerie Thief** ". I am using a similar idea here. However, I do not think Nabiki use of magic will become as potent as it did in that story.


	6. Chapter 8 First Shampoo, Then Kuno!

An unusual disclaimer: Ranma ½ is a trademark of Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ Communications, and its characters have been borrowed without permission. And Son Turned Daughter was originally written way back in 2002 by the FanFiction author Tangent, it and his characters Megumi, Yasushi and Ayane have, likewise, been borrowed without permission. Please see the first two chapter under his pen name. This story is written for non-commercial purposes only.

[][][] [][][] [][][]

It took Kuno less than a moment to comprehend. "Then you are a woman who would date two men at the same time."

"I am?" Ranma appealed to Akane.

"No, you're _not_!"

"Yeah! What _she_ said!" Most the girls PE class applauded. Hearing it, the redhead confidently said, "What _they_ say!"

"Are the they you refer to martial artists?" There was a show of hands. There were quite a few. None of them, though, belonged to Ikuko or any other members of the Truce Enforcement Club. _Where_ were they?!

"Be there any fair Valkyrie who would challenge what I said about her dating habits?" A couple did keep their arms up, but were forced to lower them by the hands of other girls. "Then you _are_ , indeed, battle maidens and recognize that a wager accompanies all challenges. _Note then_ , that this frontline female officer of your ranks lost her wager to I and in so doing won a date with this same Tatewaki Kuno you do see before you! She could not be considered a woman of honor if she did not make good on what she proffered!" The second-place debate winner turned from the jury to the defendant, "Are you a woman of honor? _Are_ you a good woman?"

"Man, must you use the word woman?" Ranma's memories of her male sensibilities were threatening her. She didn't want to date _any_ guy at all, none, zero, zilch! And most _especially_ to bandage boy!

"I am too much of a noble gentleman to use any of the lesser terms that accompany a woman that freely dates two men at once. But that is what you admit to when claiming to be a good woman of honor."

"Twisted," Yasushi said.

"Twisted is right!" Akane agreed, violently. Where was that _hammer_ when she needed it?! "Don't _listen_ to Kuno, Ranma, or you'll be drawn down into his _mad_ world!"

It was her turn to be addressed by Kuno, the mummy, "I understand that you are to be raffled off like an object as well, Akane Tendo. Am I also to understand that you two worthiest of worthy opponents are to accompany one another during your dates with such callow and callus boys who dare to treat you as chattel?"

"What did he say?" asked Ranma.

"If you mean are Ranma and I going to go on a double date, yes!" They hadn't gotten that far into considering the details, but it made sense. Ranma certainly needed a born-girl watch over her, preferably a fellow martial artist who could minimize any damage if/when she went crazy again.

"Nay, I will not hear of said travesty being a double date!"

"You have _no_ say in it, Kuno!"

"But I do, by right of winning the challenge that Ranma Saotome did herself issue to me! It shall, instead, be a..." Kuno was at a loss for a word, of all things. He feigned superior vocabulary skills by confidently finishing, "double-and-a-half date!"

The girls PE class burst out in hearty laughter at the ridiculous neologism. "Half of four people would be _two_ more, wouldn't it!?" ; "No, that would be a triple date! What he's saying is that he'll be the fifth _wheel!_ "

Kuno looked his bandages seemed to be becoming red and he almost ready to admit to being humiliated, when he had a mad inspiration, "Nay: Not a fifth wheel, but the fifth ray of a _pentagram!_ The pentagram is the _very_ symbol of Onmyodo, the most ancient and most Japanese of sorcery!" He now felt exalted, as if Amaterasu, herself, the sun goddess and the highest of even the male gods, were shining down upon him!

With that, he placed the spine of his wooden sword on his shoulder and strode proudly from the basketball court in his most courtly manner. "There shall be _magic_ on our dates! I shall have my manservant and ninja Sasuke keep watch over you fairest of all Ladies-in-waiting. I look forward to the hour of our shared tryst."

"Man! Why couldn't they have bandaged his mouth shut!" Ranma growled.

[][][]

The next class was, appropriately, math. But they didn't talk of the One Way, the Two Halves, the Three Originals, the Four Virtues, the Five Elements, the Six Sounds, the Seven Stars, the Eight Trigrams, the Nine Directions, or anything else that complicated magic. Today's lesson seemed to be about how important math was to science.

Ranma's mind drifted. After Kuno had left the girls had shown the sympathy and even pity. Most, anyway. There were a few whispers about how the new/strange girl may be the kind to not only date two men at the same time but let them buy her drinks at a booze wagon. She may have learned her martial arts only so she could get away with her "Wild Filly" ways. But how well could she protect herself while passed out drunk, or, worse, drugged?! It hadn't happened to her yet, probably, but it was only a matter of time before...

It wasn't fair! It wasn't fair! She really _was_ cursed!

[][][]

It wasn't until the last class of the day that Ikuko showed up. The whole class, girls and even guys, gasped! Any thought of paying attention to the teacher vanished. Ikuko walked with her greatest dignity to her desk in silence. But the other students couldn't stay quiet. None talked with _her_ , though. None dared!

"Psst, Akane, why is Ikuko's hair like that, now?" Ranma didn't whisper but sounded like the lowered voices of the boys.

"I don't know!" Akane whispered back. She felt really bad for Ikuko. She herself had finally gotten her hair as long as Big Sister Kasumi's and she would absolutely hate, hate, hate having to be seen in a geisha haircut, to use the term loosely. There was no suggestion of style or beauty to it.

Ikemizu-sensei, the hard-headed teacher who was almost good enough at almost all subjects to be the all-purpose substitute, had lost his concentration. In English he would talk about Japanese history then go into the Okinawa dialect and Japanese literature and finish up with straight math equations that for all the students knew could be about home ec recipes. He kept looking at the clock, looking less like a teacher and more like a student who couldn't wait for school to be over with. He, and they, were about to be released for the day, when a voice came over the PA.

"All de keiki be listen' good now! Dis iz da Big Kahuna, da Headmaster of Furinkan. Aloha!"

All of the papers the teacher had been holding flew up in the air as his nervous breakdown arrived.

[][][]

It was after school hours. The students should have been able to leave. Instead, they all had to attend assembly by order of the Big Kahuna, The Headmaster, or, as the teachers warned them, the owner of Furinkan. The reason it could put so much emphasis on the martial arts was because it was a private school not funded by the government at all, except through a few grants. The Headmaster controlled all other of its money. What he said was as good as law.

Ranma walked into the large building with rows and rows of seats casually, with her hands behind her red head. She was already not impressed with this so-called "Headmaster". "Why ain't he callin' himself Kouchou? Why does he hafta use an English title? Japanese ain't good enough for him?"

"I don't know. But the entrance standards are low and the tuition is quite cheap," Akane informed her.

"You get what you pay for," Nabiki informed her.

"Is that reason enough for we havin' to do whatever he says whenever he says? Geez! You'd think he thought he was feudal lord and we're all his peasants." Ranma, unlike the Tendos, came from a long line of peasant warriors. Denied swords and other conventional weapons they had had to improvise with whatever was available to them. They had been masters in anything-goes before anybody had appropriated the term.

"Nerima is technically the Kuno fiefdom," Nabiki reminded her.

"Kuno my "lord and master"? Yeah, right! As if that's gonna happen!"

[][][]

Their heads bowed like servants waiting for their master to arrive, the teachers waited on stage. Well, all except the English teacher, Miss Yukari, she was always unpredictable, Ranma was told, and took nothing really seriously. She was the opposite of Ikemizu-sensei, who took _everything_ seriously.

Suddenly over the PA came the music for "I want to go back to little grass shack; In Kealakekua, Hawaiʻi…" And out came -

"What's the matter, Ranma?!" Akane tried to keep from crying out in concern on seeing Ranma's reaction.

"It's him! I know it! He's got that same little palm tree on his head!"

"You've got better eyes than I do," Akane said. "From where we're sitting, all I see is a mummy wearing a Hawaiian shirt."

"He looks like Kuno's daddy," Nabiki laughed remembering her classmate from earlier that day.

The Headmaster came up to the one prop on stage, a podium with two microphones. Like Kuno, they had neglected to bandage up his mouth. "Can me hear a big "ALO~HA!" for da Big Kashuna!? Da keiki's beloved Headmaster has returned!" Student looking at student, waiting for the first to do it, finally there was a half-hearted but loud "Aloha!".

"Me tank me pupilz ve~ry much! Me know me keiki miss da Big Kahuna! Me have many big announcement! Change iz comin' to Furinkan! First iz da suspension of da Truce Enforcement Club until me decide different." There were groans from the girls and applause from the Hentai Horde.

"He can't do that!"

"Yes, he can," Nabiki told Ranma and Akane.

"Maybe me decide different when Ranma Saotome come on stage!"

"I will!" Ranma got up from her seat. She was surrounded by a sea of students. But not for long. The little redhead in the schoolgirl dress leaped onto the backs of the empty seats that were scattered throughout the auditorium, only occasionally stepping on the heads of those boys who had applauded. Some got nosebleeds from the view they got up her dress, even though she was wearing green panties

In one final bound, she was on the stage. "This is the guy at the booze wagon!" She told everybody, not needing a microphone.

"Wahine keiki iz right. Da Headmaster alway show hiz concern for hiz pupilz! Keiki should no be drinkin' de illegal drink!"

"It _Wasn't_ like that! -He, tried, to, cut, off, my, _PigTail!_!"

"Pigtail no belong in school! Da dress code say so!"

"You _Made_ the dress code!"

"Da code iz de code and da Big Kahuna must enforce da code on all da unfortunate keiki! Da Headmaster haz no choice. Da keiki haz not be obeyin' da code since me be gone. Ting's be too easy, now be hard. Be betta for studyin'!" And with that, the bandaged man picked up one of the microphones and walked with it to the middle of the stage, just yards from Ranma. "Startin' today, all da wahine keiki be gettin' da geisha haircut and da kane keiki be gettin' da topknot."

There was instant rebellion among the students. Megumi had her own crowd, but Akane was recognized as the strongest girl still in the audience and was instantly elected their leader, while Kuno the mummy became the hentai horde's. Hiroshi and Daisuke set the example for those who did not wish to fight. They sat it out in the auditorium.

The rebels just stood, preparing to move, waiting… for the Wild Filly, Raging Red, the Fury of Furinkan to make the first move! Up there on stage with all eyes on her, Ranma felt the pressure. She wanted to rush off stage! She wanted to be a man - _the_ man, the hero! But here she was, a damsel in this stressful situation! Her reputation depended on winning! What was _wrong_ with her?! The last time she felt like this was with... _Shampoo!_ That was it! The last time she felt all eyes on her was in the amazon village! Back there she had been so new to being a girl she was still almost all-boy. Then that all changed with the Kiss of Death and her being forced to run. It made her feel less of a man and that made her more of a girl. She had actually been reduced to cowering a few times. Like she wanted to do now!

Where were those hormones when she needed them the most?! They weren't there because of the Something: The something that didn't let her steal, borrow, or reject gifts. This Big Guy was not only the kouchou, he owned the school. Akane had told her that they were basically here was because this topnut guy had made their education practically a gift! She was obligated, no matter how much the peasant warrior in her wanted to cry To Hell With You, You Hair Molester!

There was only one thing she could do. The little redhead reached around and undid her pigtail.

"Ranma!" Akane screamed above the gasps of surprise and total disappointment in their hoped for heroine! Some broke down and cried. The Hentai Horde proved that men could cry, too. And there was even a tear in the eye of tough-girl Megumi.

Fighting back her own tears, the little schoolgirl turned and told her boss. "Do it! Do it now!"

"Da keiki iz more da good girl dan da Headmaster give wahine credit for!" His giant shears came out and with one snip, the petite cutie had a pixie cut in back.

"No!" Even Hiroshi and Daisuke had risen from their seats. They reflected the sentiment of salaryman of the booze wagon, a work of art had been totally desecrated! Tragedy was felt by all.

"Now for da bangs!"

"I Don't Think So!" Ranma cried! "You attacked me! _Again!_ That's all I needed! Physical assault! Ranma Saotome won't allow no third time!" She wrenched the big scissors away from him and: Snip!

The palm tree from the top of his head fell to the stage. The Feudal Lord of Furinkan was without his topknot.

"Ranma!" Akane cried, doing her first far-jump from a run. She went from the aisle to the stage and landed beside her friend. She was so surprised with herself, her fighting stance was sloppy.

The Wild Filly went up to her and the audience thought they were quickly agreeing on a strategy. The Hentai Hater nodded and stepped back, allowing her ally to take the lead. Raging Red was ready to become the Fury! This battle would be the stuff of legend….

"Attention! I have something you _all_ should hear!" Ikuko said, speaking into the second mike of the podium. She held up a ream of paper. "The Truce Enforcement Club members will be passing copies of these throughout the assembly. They're the _school record_ of the Headmaster!"

"School is over! We don't want any reading!" , "Yeah! We want to see the action!" , "Bring on the fight!"

But others did read. "That's his name!?" So many people repeated it at nearly the same down it was like a roar that echoed down onto the stage. "KANETO!?" , and more than one said, "That's more of a little boy's or little girl's name!"

"No! The record prints a base, vile and _utter_ falsehood!" Kuno did his own running leap onto the stage, the mummy's wooden sword poised to smite. "There is no way I will allow this foreigner to despoil the noble syllables of Kuno!"

"But, Sahib, dhe name means _Nine Abilities_. Dhis dhe Maharaja will demonstrate that no one may think otherwise!"

"He changed accents?" , "Oh, look, it says here his family name _is_ Kuno" , "I think he _is_ a Kuno" , "Yeah, just as insane." , "Believe it or not, _more_ insane." , "Look!"

A rope was dropped from above the stage. Kaneto Kuno put his hands in two of its many cloth loops and was pulled up higher and higher. "Dhe Maharaja knows all dhe secrets of dhe fakirs!"

"Yeah! A fake fakir!" , "Yeah, but he did that pretty well for a guy who flunked PE." , "Do you see his _other_ grades?!" , "Even _I_ have better grades than that!"

Schoolgirl Ranma's stance had changed to where her she was leaning on the handles of the points-down shears as she coldly looked at Kuno waving his bokken around, getting it more and more entangled with a rope. The idiot had actually thought if he cut the bottom the rest would fall, taking the other idiot Kuno down with it, and was still not quite convinced it wouldn't work. "Come back here! You prove you are not a samurai by not fighting like a man! You are but a foreigner who needs be deported for showing no respect to the Magnificent and Noble Japanese culture!"

"I wish they had bandaged up _both_ their big mouths!"

[][][]

While Ikuko and the others of the 'disbanded' Truce Enforcement Club were selling raffle tickets to the students gathered in the auditorium, the two prizes, Ranma and Akane, slipped backstage. They could still hear her, though, over the PA system. "...win dates with the two most popular girls in school! Just 1,000 yen a ticket! Show your support for our club! Stand up to the Headmaster!"

"Akane, you do have the Dragon Whisker I gave you?! Tell me you do! You didn't _lose_ it!?"

"No, I still have it." She was about to place her hand where it was, remembered where it was, blushed a little, and said, "It's in my bra."

"Bra!?"

"The uniform doesn't have pockets!" she frowned.

"Okay! Okay! As long as you _got_ it! Without it I can _Never_ be a guy again!"

Akane _did_ touch her chest this time. "Oh, Ranma! I'm so sorry! I thought it was only water that affected your curse!"

"It does! The whisker is for another curse!"

" _Another?!_ You have _another_ curse! Why didn't you tell me?! We're friends!"

"Aw, man! I guess I shoulda, but things've just been so _crazy!_ There's so much to try and remember as a girl!"

"I understand," Akane said, placing a hand on her.

"Come on, I want to get that whisker back safely in my hair as soon as possible! Which way to the nearest girls room?"

"But(?) you don't have any hair left to put it in."

[][][]

"So you really _do_ need those pruning shears!" Akane said after her friend had revealed yet another truth to her. It was still a little hard to believe, but she wouldn't have believed a boy could become a girl - and back - so easily before she met Ranma. "First you have hair too long, then _no_ hair!"

The very short-haired redhead nodded, then frowned. "Maybe you should do the cuttin'. It's gonna be kind of awkward doin' it myself," she said, testing to see how well she could get the big scissor around to the back of her neck.

"Okay."

"Leave it a little long! Below maybe all way to my waist. Kasumi can trim it proper-like when we get home." Ranma was about to push the backstage restroom door open when it opened on its own.

A little man in a purple ninja costume was coming out. "That was sweaty work pulling up the Master."

"Okay! What were you doin' in a girls room!?" Ranma demanded. "Guys should not go in them!" The irony was lost on her.

"What?" the small man said, lifting the strip of cloth he was using as a blindfold. "Who are you?"

"That's _My_ question!" And Akane agreed with her.

"Wait! Red hair, and … I do not see a pigtail. Is your name Ranma?"

"Forget my name!"

"I cannot! I am under orders to keep a Ranma Saotome and Akane Tendo under surveillance. Oh, hello, Akane. I didn't see you there."

"You know me?"

"A ninja tells no one but his master. Or mistress. And even then, it is difficult to tell my masters or mistress...anything."

"Tell me your name!" Ranma threatened to beat it out of the runt.

"A ninja is anonymous! He has no identity of his own!"

"Sasuke! Sasuke! Help me out of this binding the despicable foreigner has ensnared me in!"

"Yes, Master!" And Sasuke hurried to unwrap Kuno from the rope that now was not only tangled around in his sword but himself as well.

"Come on!" Ranma yanked Akane into the girls room. "Maybe we can escape from Kuno in here!"

"But his pet ninja doesn't seem to have a problem going where only _girls_ are meant to be!" Akane growled. Again, the irony was lost. Ranma was only a girl _then_. He would become a guy, full of memories.

And that guy brain was about to make his reappearance.

But first, she had to go to one of the stalls. "Turn on the hot water in a sink, Akane while I get outa my dress and panties."

"Don't forget your whisker!" she said, unbuttoning the top buttons of her blouse. She was glad she had the privacy. She was still afraid that everybody in the auditorium had seen her put it in her bra even though she had done her best to keep them from seeing what she was doing. (Of course, everybody's eyes were on Ranma, not her. Well, all except Hiroshi and Daisuke. They had radar about that sort of thing.)

"Wait until I got nothin' on! Gotta keep my hands free to undress. There!" Her things on the toilet seat lid, the completely nude petite girl with the best figure in all of the school, if not Nerima, came out of the stall. She got the whisker from the friend, who was having a wave of envy that bothered her crotch, and bent over the sink with the running water. "Okay, we gotta time this right!"

"Right!" Akane said, the shears ready, already snip, snipping.

"One, two...three!" The redhead stuck her head into the sink water. And the brunette

...did not appear. "The water's not hot enough!" she cried in frustration.

"Hot water costs money," Nabiki said, coming out of a stall. "What kinky game are _you_ two playing? Big scissors, Little Sister," she said, making it sound suggestive.

"It's _Not_ like that!" Ranma cried, her bared boobs jiggling more than usual from her being agitated. "I need hot water to turn back into a guy!"

"You'll have to wait. This is a low-end school and most of their budget goes to repairing the damaged caused by you martial artists. They nickel-and-dime where they can."

"You mean they won't reset the hot water heater," Akane said, remembering, at last, that the water at school had only been tepid. Despite getting sweaty and smelly playing sports, everybody had to use one of the large, concrete trough-sinks to clean up before their next classes. Like so many Japanese schools there were no showers in the gym. And this in a country that thrived on public bathing!

"I can reset the hot water heater," Sasuke said, falling down from the ceiling onto his butt. He meant to land on his feet, but the blindfold made that too difficult for what ninja skills he had.

"What are you doing here!" Akane cried. "Get out!" Ranma yelled.

"I have a right to be here! My masters own this school."

"Wait!" Nabiki said to the girls. Going over to the small man, she squatted down to be on his level. She grazed her finger over his costume. "You'll make the water hotter, won't you? It would make things so~o much better." And not just for Ranma.

"I cannot do that without the permission of one of my masters, Nabiki Tendo."

"Oh!" She said, raising up and frowning. "You think your masters own the house where _I_ and my sisters live, as well?!"

"You do have a mortgage. Several."

Nabiki knew when she was defeated. But she wasn't entirely defeated. Like Ranma, she never lost! "If we can get Kuno-baby, that is, the Tatewaki Kuno master of yours, to agree, you'll see that the water is hot enough to steam?"

"I would not have the choice not to."

[][][]

And so they found their way, backstage, past props and to costumes.

"Honestly, Ranma, why don't you just wait until we get home and can use the hot water there?!" Akane asked.

"Because I'm _cursed!_ I'm a water magnet! It's all been cold water this far, but I don't got my Dragon Whisker! Hot water _has to_ come after me! You have no idea how _bad, bad, bad_ the hair curse is!" It was made worse by her growing mania over her idiot Old Man! The very, very, very last thing she wanted was to look like him! _Especially_ as a girl!

"Okay. If you say so, Ranma. I guess I can understand," her friend said. She said to Nabiki, "Why do we have to wear these costumes?" Her middle sister was the only one still in _her_ uniform.

"Because, despite what Kuno-baby says about the "Magnificent and Noble Japanese culture", he has a thing for European culture. Heut cuisine is his favorite food, and Shakespeare is his favorite playwright. The dresses you have on are from Romeo and Juliet."

" _Really?!_ " Akane was delighted, finally focusing on something more than the problems of her friend. "Is this Juliet's costume?!"

"Really!? Does it matter!?" Ranma had no time for this! Hot water was lurking everywhere!

"Yes!" she snapped at her. Then mellowed. "Yes. I listened to your truths, and you'll listen to this one of mine. Later." Ranma wasn't the only one with a curse or two, she thought.

"Okay, I will!" and the anxious redhead hurried to meet her "Romeo", whatever that character was. She hadn't a clue and didn't care. All she knew she had to pretend she was in some stupid romantic play.

[][][]

"I tire of being blindfolded, Sasuke." Now only his mouth was visible.

"It is for the sake of the modesty of your Ladies-in-waiting, Master. They told me they are preparing a surprise for you! Of a good kind, I was assured."

"Oh? You do say?" and a cocky smile appeared that could be seen between the bandages. "My persistence in the pursuit of romance is finally bearing fruit. Then it shall be! I await the wonder they will present me!"

"Oh, Ku~no! It's _me!_ Your Ran,Romeo!"

"Juliet! Juliet! Right now you are _Juliet_ , Ranma!" Akane loudly prompted.

"Whatever! Just take off that blindfold and look, you (...)" she forced her voice to so low he couldn't hear what she was really thinking of him.

Having seen the two coming, Sasuke had sneaked away and was now turning on a portable spotlight. This was the glare that reached Kuno as he took off the blindfold. "It is the sun!" His eyes adjusting, he saw the redhead. "...and Juliet is, indeed, the Moon."

"Hey! I'm Juliet, too!" Akane yelled.

"Nay, not merely a Juliet. Akane you are Diana herself! The Roman Artemis, goddess of the hunt and all thing wild!"

"Hear that, " _Wild_ Horse"?!" It thrilled her no end to be upstaging her.

"And you are Venus herself!" Kuno "consoled" his other Lady-in-waiting. "The Olympian Aphrodite come down to Earth in maidenly form. Your beauty is my aphrodisiac."

"Oh, Kuno. That's the first time somebody's called me beautiful," that she had bothered to remember. Was being beautiful better than being cute? Maybe not to the Japanese, but Kuno was being European.

As Sasuke was maneuvering the spotlight so the two stars of his master's fantasies could be given the best, beauty-enhancing lighting, he didn't see one of the sandbags he had used to raise Master Kaneto Kuno. The wheels bumped against it hard enough for the spotlight to topple! The large lamp on the end of the long pole fell not onto the stage but into a prop that was also used for cleaning: A trough of tepid water.

Only the electrical sparks and the electricity now zapping through it made the water hot! All that did not really startle or concern Ranma. It was the splash and steam!

"Eeek!" Ranma screamed like the little girl she appeared to be - And jumped into Kuno's arms to be raised about the water.

"Oh, my goddess of love! Again you throw yourself at me!" And this time he had a very close view of the cleavage her decolletage revealed. "You cannot keep yourself away from me!

'It's a curse,' is how he heard her words and added a maidenly blush to go with them.

"Nay, say not so, It is but your uncontainable expression of love for your Romeo. Fight it not! Love is the very reason, the source of life! Feel the vital energies that come-"

"Kuno!" Akane screamed at not having the starring role. "What about _Me!_ "

"I have not forsaken you, my Dianic Juliet."

"Kuno-baby, your vocabulary is off," Nabiki said as a casual audience. "Also your dialog. There are no real Shakespearean quotes. You're just like your daddy, after all. No wonder you attend the school your family owns."

Kuno paid no attention, as the noble scion was too busy ogling the other two, albeit in a more refined why than Hiroshi or Daisuke were capable of doing,

Meanwhile, Ranma was cocking back her fist, ready to deliver it to the creep's bandaged face. Until Akane saved her, "Hot water heater."

"Guh! Grr! Ugh! Aaaa! I can't do it! Please, Akane! Please! Anything, but PLEASE!"

A great big smile broke out on the _now_ star of the show. She walked up to Kuno and bent forward. "You can hold me, Romeo, if you put the second-rate Juliet down."

"SECOND-Rate!"

"Ranma," Nabiki reminded her. "This is one time you want to be first. Bow out gracefully."

"Gracious!? I ain't never been gracious!" She felt her craziness beginning to get out of hand. She had to do something or she was going to totally lose it! What?! That? Yes: THAT!

"Ku~ *Yuck* Kuno, will you do something for me if I…" *Gag* "kiss you?"

"Yes. Anything." He tried to be as suave as his skyrocketing ardor allowed.

"Promise? Word of honor?"

"I am the very embodiment of a Man of Honor!"

And Ranma kissed Kuno!

" _Ran,_ MA!" Akane screamed! Juliet was HER role!

"Just how bisexual is Ranma?" Nabiki asked herself.

[][][]

"No hot water! No hot water!" the short-haired short redhead cried, threatening to go into a tantrum. At least she was back in her schoolgirl dress. It had taken some doing, but Akane and Nabiki had finally convinced her to not stay nude in the backstage girls restroom.

"You heard that ninja voyeur!" Akane said. She was still ticked about not getting to really be Juliet.

"And he's right. A hot water heater can't magically make hot water." Not if it goes against the nature of the magic being used, or that was Nabiki's guess. "And especially, when it has to heat up _all_ the water of the school!"

"But what about the hot water! There's hot water out there! It'll get me!"

"Here!" Nabiki said, presenting her with a yellow rain slicker and a motorcycle helmet. "This will protect you from getting wet!"

"Where'd you get them."

"Let's just say 'costumes'." Why was the magic cooperating now? She didn't know. But her guess was that the Jusenkyo curse was stronger than the hair curse - whatever that was. Maybe it didn't like the competition and was showing the other magic which was stronger.

[][][]

With the little woman covered up so nobody could really tell she was a schoolgirl or had red hair, the three of them headed for the Tendo home. Their school day was finally, finally over!

And still, Akane could not drop it. "You _stole_ my kiss!"

"I. Did. Not! It don't _count_ if I use a bandage!"

"And Ranma used one Kuno's own bandages, too," Nabiki said, highly amused.

"And then I made sure the bandage would keep his big mouth _shut!_ "


	7. Chapter 9 The Truths of Others

An unusual disclaimer: Ranma ½ is a trademark of Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ Communications, and its characters have been borrowed without permission. And Son Turned Daughter was originally written way back in 2002 by the FanFiction author Tangent, and his characters Megumi, Yasushi and Ayane have, likewise, been borrowed without permission. _Please_ see the first two chapters of this story under _his_ pen name. This story is written for non-commercial purposes only.

[][][] [][][] [][][]

Only one of the three women in the Tendo bath room was nude, and she was also the only one without long hair. The redhead was missing her pigtail.

"Are you sure, Kasumi?" Ranma asked.

"I am the daughter of a dojo master. I can handle it." Big Sister held the giant, hair-cutting shears at the ready.

"Are you ready, Akane?"

"I can handle it, too!" But one hand was completely covering her eyes. Her other was holding the showerhead and it was near the hot water tap.

"Get your hand away!" the nude redhead yelled. " _I'll_ turn the taps! It'd take you too long before you go from hot to cold! Long ain't what we get before my hair gets too long!"

"Well, SORRY!" she nearly screeched. Sounding more like the female lead in Shakespeare's The Taming of the Shrew rather than Romeo and Juliet.

"Up a little higher, Akane," Kasumi directed the sister who still refused to look. "To the left: There!" And the little woman turned on the hot water.

"You people had better hurry. You-know-who has to be almost done," their look-out, Nabiki, said, entering the room before the bath room. " _What the-!?_ " A black, slithering monster came at her! As if that being startling wasn't enough, it was disturbingly very _hairy_. Despite herself, she had to lift a leg away from it even though it did not reach completely into the utility room.

Kasumi was the Tendo beautician. She could and did cut hair.

"Gimme! Gimme!" the redhead demanded, And Akane reached for the Dragon Whisker in her bra. Forgetting she was still holding the showerhead, she got herself wet, and her bra was made visible beneath her now see-through blouse. The time it took her to growl so upset the the now-redhead-again was reaching for them. Akane had to rap her hand away from her boobs.

Pushing her way into her soaked bra, she finally brought out the magic strand. Ranma snatched it away and hurriedly tied her pigtail. She did a fumblingly decent job. The only real problem with her hair, now, was that even with the pigtail her hair was as long on her as Kasumi's and Akane's were on them.

"Just a trim, Big Sister."

"You have no time for that," Nabiki said, "I hear him flushing!" The toilet room was next door.

The naked girl swung around, already imagining her enemy coming in. "I can't let Pop see all this hair! He's _bald!_ " How was she going to _hide_ over fifteen feet of hair?! Despite this, she thought she had no choice but try! She would start with the most noticeable hair, the red hair.

Red hair? Yes, there was red hair mixed with the black. _How?!_ An answer came to her! She gathered up as much of the hair as she could. The red strands _were_ heavier because they were the wet ones. That meant all she had to do was to get the ends of the hair into the hot water of the furo tub - No, no! What was she _thinking!_ She was so flustered she forgot it was _cold_ water that made her a girl!

Akane got a chance to cool off the overly dramatic 'Juliet'. And, oh, yes, the stray boy-hair, too.

[What's going on in here?!] read the panda's sign.

"Look! See? Don't you wish you had hair like this, Pop? Only _girls_ don't have to worry about being bald." And she stroked the soggy strands but also the Kasumi/Akane-length hair still on her head hanging over her shoulder. "It does take a long time to shampoo it, though. That's the problem with long hair."

The panda glared enviously, but its next sign read, [I have fur] And with that, it turned and left.

Ranma sighed and collapsed onto her bare butt, the hair between her legs.

"That was close! But how long can he stay an idiot?! Don't you ever, ever, _ever_ tell either of the two fathers about my pigtail!"

"Maybe if you were a little louder, _you_ could be telling him," Nabiki said, peeking down the hall the panda had gone.

" _What!?_ " But she thought she was safe for now, when Nabiki came into the bath room.

"Man! My hair curse's really got me spooked!" She realized, then, she was hugging the bundled-up hairs to her. She, then, did her best to toss and kick them aside.

Nabiki leaned against the doorjamb, her arms crossed. "You do know how to speak girl."

"What?" Ranma said only half-paying attention as she was too busy trying to get rid of the long, loose hair that remained on her wet body. And she did in ways that all three born-girls thought they would _not_ have. Ranma did find out how deep her soft and jiggly girl-parts went.

"When you were speaking to your dad, you were using the female form of Japanese, not your usual though ungrammatical male form."

"Okay. So?"

"She means you're becoming more of a girl, Little Sister," Kasumi said.

Ranma stopped what she was doing, and looked like a deer caught in headlights. A part of her was delighted. But that part was deep. The parts on top were _not_ happy.

When she at last moved, it was back toward the shower.

Only Nabiki seemed to notice the excess hair disappearing.

"Ranma!" Akane cried as the girl without any long hair on her body took the showerhead away from her. "You're not?!" But she was! Akane turned her head away and covered her eyes again.

"Oh, my!" Kasumi said, bowing her head and simply not looking at the young man any more than she had to.

"Yowzer," Nabiki said, wondering if she could get away with bringing out her camera.

"The curse is tryin' to turn me into a girl," Ranma growled. "But I gotta be a girl to get to know how to keep from bein' _like_ a girl when I don't wanna be." Maybe he should take the example of Mr. Tendo and just cry. "It ain't fair!"

[][][]

The three Tendo sisters left him alone in the bath room. He would rant one moment, scream the next, and then talk in a chain-of-consciousness ramble, and begin the cycle all over again. Not once did they hear him cry. Nabiki remained close by to take notes.

Akane had tried to stay and comfort Ranma, but the boy refused it. And, of course, Akane was happy he had. She wasn't ready to deal with a nude man. "Kasumi, are we going to have supper soon?" Maybe some food would make him feel better. Eating seemed very important to Ranma.

"In a little while," Kasumi said, walking past the kitchen. "But right now, I'm calling Dr. Tofu."

"No!" Akane cried.

"But Dr. Tofu is the only _male_ Ranma can talk to about his problem. He really does need to learn how to deal with his girl memories while a boy."

"You're right, of course, Big Sis. But, uh, why have Dr. Tofu make another housecall? He's a busy man. I can take Ranma to see him on our way to school. Or after school, too! Maybe Dr. Tofu can give him a regular appointment!"

"Having some kind of regularity in his life would be good for Little Brother. His life seems so...chaotic." Then she gave a sad smile, "His name does mean " _Chaos Orchid_ "."

"You're right! The syllables Ran-ma can be written that way! I've been thinking of his name being " _Wild Horse"_ ," another way of writing it in Japan's complicated writing and interpretation systems.

Kasumi decided to go into the kitchen, after all. Her mind wandered, though, and wondered if there was any way to help him in the fact that, " _Orchid_ means "testicle", you know."

"Kasumi! Do you have to say that word!?"

But she moved on with her own chain-of-thought, "That means even the female orchids are testicles, too. I am pretty sure that orchids are associated with positive male qualities." Her eyes lit up! "Ask Dr. Tofu if orchids can be used as a herbal remedy for Ranma! At least, perhaps, if he _thought_ they would help him retain his manliness, it may."

"Help his manliness?(?)" Akane found herself questioning whether she really _did_ want Ranma to stay the jerk he probably was when he was a guy just from being a guy. It was because of _that_ half of him, she didn't get to be _Juliet_. - _Again!_

[][][]

When she entered the common room, the shortened-pigtailed male son was fighting with his human dad like, to her, typical human males. Of course, most are not martial artists. The excuse they had for fighting, though, was _not_ typical. "How _Dare_ a son of mine be photographed in a skimpy, frilly maid dress!" Genma holding up the evidence that he had not destroyed.

"I can dare whatever I care to dare! I do _Anything-Goes!_ No use rippin' them up, there's more and there's always _gonna_ be more! What do you want to see me dressed-up next like! Too bad you don't got no pictures of me in Nabiki's girl-kimono! You saw me in it, yesterday! Remember how I sat at that booze wagon with two grown men! No, maybe not! You were too stinkin' drunk!" What was a more-or-less standard battle suddenly became different as Ranma yelled into his dad's ear, "Do you still got a hangover?!"

Last night's drinker was still recovering from the hair-of-the-dog remedy of today.

The dozen or so photos the dad had managed to hold while fighting (mainly with his feet and hard, bald, head) went flying in all directions. Ranma was able to get each and every one before any landed on the floor.

"Kasumi, where's the tape?! I'm gonna put these back up on the wall!" He said it but didn't make any attempt at doing it.

"Remember, boy, I sleep in the same room as you do," the dad said, implying something Akane - and Ranma - didn't want to think about. But it all involved what teenage boys were typically expected to do when alone in their bedrooms when they had pictures of a cute, sexy, curvaceous redhead in a skimpy, frilly French maid's uniform.

[][][]

"Aren't you going to change into a maid and serve us?" Genma said as he waited at the table for supper.

"I ain't in no mood. Drop it. Or do we 'talk' about that hangover of yours again." By then Kasumi had trimmed the pigtail ends. Ranma just needed the chance to turn into the girl if only to tie it up neater.

For once, his Old Man didn't dwell on something that would provoke a fight. Instead, he had news. "I'm going to work tomorrow, you know."

"You are?" Ranma was actually interested. Maybe that Something that was keeping him - and her - overly honest was doing the same to his no-good Pop.

"I am. I will work for Tofu."

" _No!_ You can't!" Akane practically pleaded.

"Sounds perfect to me," Ranma said. "The Doc knows Pop is cursed, too. And how many other people'd hire a panda?"

Kneeling near both of them, Kasumi placed a hand on Ranma's shoulder and hugged Akane's. "I think that's a good idea. And Akane has something to suggest."

"She does?"

"I do?" Okay, then. If Big Sis thinks she should. "We were thinking, Kasumi and me, that, maybe, you would get counseling from Dr. Tofu."

"Why would I want that?! I'm a man and a man has to deal with his own problems."

"True. Just so," Genma agreed. "I'm glad to hear you talking like my son."

Akane ignored him and concentrated on Ranma. "Don't be a jerk. You're a girl half the time and during the other half, you're a man who has to deal with the other half! Do you _like_ being a voyeur?!"

"What's that?"

"A pervert that peeps on naked women!"

"I _ain't_ a pervert! And I'm a _woman_ when I peep!" Somehow that didn't sound right.

" _Really?_ Close your eyes. -Close them! Now, don't think of the girls locker room. What don't you see?"

Ranma began to grow red and fidget where he sat. "No fair! You're askin' me trick questions."

"Okay. Still keep them closed! See the redhead in the mirror?"

"I don't look at myself in a mirror."

"But you _have_ looked down on your boobs when you had no clothes on. You've seen your nipples." She frowned, thinking about their trip to the public bath yesterday. "I _saw_ you look between your legs!"

"You did _what_ ," Genma said in a low, disapproving voice.

"Like _you_ don't look between your legs!"

"I see only what I'm supposed to see. A man of honor does not look at the privates of a woman not his wife."

" _WHAT!?_ That woman is _me_ and I wouldn't have no privates of a woman to look at if you hadn't taken me to be cursed!" The battle was renewed.

Or not. "That's enough!" Kasumi had moved to take their supper plates off the table. "You are _our_ guests in _our_ house. And _we_ believe a woman may look at her privates if she wishes." Oh, my! Did she really say that!? Well, this was for Little Brother/Sister's sake.

" _And_ show them to a guy _not_ her husband!" Why'd she have to go and say that?! Akane knew she would never intentionally do _that!_ But she had done that with Ranma! This _boy_ has the memories!

"Kasumi, I'm getting low on tampons, may I borrow some from you(?)" Nabiki said.

"Nabiki, you know I only use sanitary napkins."

"I don't like pads. They're just too-"

"Women talk!" Genma growled with a heavy frown, got up, and took his plate from Kasumi. But before he left, he warned, "They'll have you buying some of their feminine hygiene products for them, next."

He really hadn't connected all the dots of the dot-to-dot puzzle, Nabiki grinned grimly. And, looking at the black-haired boy, neither had he.

"That drove him off!" Ranma said, at least pleased he didn't have to put up with his pop for a while.

Kasumi set Ranma's plate back down in front of him. But her mind was on, "Maybe it would be best if Dr. Tofu explained the facts of life to Ranma. It _would_ be better coming from a man. Little Sister is the one who has to deal with them, but it's Little Brother who has to support her."

"And it will make him a better husband," Nabiki chimed in. "Wouldn't we _all_ like a husband who can understand what a woman has to go through and not look away?"

As coincidence would have it, their own dad entered the room. "I just saw Genma. The storm has passed, I see," and he looked around, "and without any real damage to my property!"

"Come in and eat, Father," Kasumi said.

"Yes, Daddy. We were just talking about a man buying tampons and pads for the women in their life."

Soun Tendo paled and turned. "I'm really not that hungry. Later."

"Nabiki, that wasn't nice what you did to our own father," Kasumi said.

"And periods are nice for us?"

"Then, it's agreed! Dr. Tofu will counsel Ranma!" Akane said.

"I ain't agreed," Ranma stubbornly persisted (around mouths full of food). "And I thought Akane _wanted_ me to look away when I'm a guy and have my eyes closed."

"Of course, you'd fail to understand. She said just the opposite," Nabiki said. "A nudist is a nudist, a genuine nudist, because they become so used to seeing people nude they really don't get their jollies seeing an unclothed, bare, naked body."

"That's not what I meant. And I am not convinced that happens," Akane, the pervert hater, said.

"Nudists have children," Kasumi said. "But let's hear Dr. Tofu opinion."

"But what about before then?!"

[][][]

Before then, Ranma had his dreams.

Shampoo faced him on that giant, suspended log, again. The amazon warrior who appeared to be an ordinary girl had _two_ chui - those balls were solid, lethal metal! Again, she attacked first! Again, he went against the Code and fought a girl! But that was okay, right? He was a girl, too!

He wore a purple negligee and matching purple panties. That sort of made him a girl, right? And he hadn't really gone against the Code. He hadn't kicked her: As she was running at him leaning forward his foot had used her own momentum against her and flipped her and pushed her - hard! - in one maneuver up into the air and off the log. He had won without _actually_ hitting her! It was okay!

He was so confident he had done the right thing, he turned to the audience of amazons. The girls of the Furinkan PE locker room stared at him. They didn't like the way he was dressed! It was so unmanly! What did he think he was, a girl!? What was a man doing on the female side of a public bath! After all, the woman here were nudists!

Except for Akane. She was dressed like Juliet. She was standing on the rim of the huge public soaking-tub. She was reaching out for him. As he was getting off the log, it rolled in the water. And he fell into her hug. She steadied him and kissed him. And he shrank.

He turned into a real girl, _the_ shorter girl, the one with red hair and boobs and an ass ... trapped in a schoolgirl uniform. Crying, she tore away and leaped down from the rim

...and into the arms of Kuno. As he held onto the small, light thing she was in one arm, he challenged Juliet with a real sword. Akane defended Ranma's honor with a giant pair of shears. Snip! And his weapon was cut in half.

"My manhood!" the redhead without her pigtail cried.

The audience around a booze wagon wanted her to sing and dance for them. Tentacles reached out for-

Ranma woke up! Again. He had had similar dreams earlier. And later?

The thing about Ranma's dreams, there were two things missing: the panda and his pop. The deep psychological reason for that that was beyond his martial arts training to recognize. In fact, he was glad his drill-sergeant of a sensei he grew up with wasn't in them to see him reduced to being a weak, soft girl. And he wasn't just _acting_ like one.

[][][]

He was rudely woken up by being splashed by, "Hot! That water's hot! Why'd'you do that for, you stupid Old Man!?"

His pop tossed aside the teakettle and plastic bath room pail. "Why did you sleep as a girl! I woke up for our morning spar and found you a girl again!"

"It's because dreamin's easier for me as a girl! I got a girl's brain and when I dream I'm a girl-"

He was picked him up by his tank top. "No son of mine has a girl's brain! Snap out of it! Think like the man I raised you to be!"

"I'll think like the girl you made me if I want!" And Ranma's wrist blocked his pop's fist while his hand pressure-pointed the Old Man's wrist. When he landed on the floor, he raced to the one window in the guest room, threw it open and leaped out. He knew his sparring partner would follow.

[][][]

"Man! Old habits are hard to break!" Little Sister said, coming into the kitchen. "I still spar with him, even after all he's done to me!"

"Habits are easier to give up if you replace them with new habits," Kasumi said as she prepared the homemade miso soup for breakfast.

"Yeah, like what new habits?" All she gave was a knowing smile. Oh, it was "For me to know and you to figure out" was it?

"Kasumi! I'm off for my morning jog!"

[][][]

"Why can't I jog with you, Akane? I'm dressed the same as you."

"Boxer's are not shorts! And think what jogging will do to your boobs!"

Ranma looked down on them. "Yeah, so? I'm a martial artist. I know how to handle discomfort, hurt and even pain when my boobs bounce and swing."

"That's not the point! It's not what they do to you, it's what they do to others - to Guys!"

The redhead scratched her head (and checked to see if her pigtail was still there). "I seem to remember, I guess. I thought it was maybe because I was a stranger. Or a strange girl."

"You really don't have a clue, do you?" That was enough. The _Battle of the Juliets_ was put aside. At least until something else triggered similar emotions.

[][][]

"Why are we sparing out in the garden? We have a dojo," Akane said, still in her jogging outfit.

"Because Pop can see me doing manly things as a girl. And because of the hot water he woke me up with this morning! I don't trust him." And she smiled. "I want to be near the koi pond."

"So if he splashes you with hot water, you can jump into the cold water!" Akane smiled, too.

"Yeah. But it also means I can change him into a panda and don't have to listen to him," she giggled.

"Okay, then - AiiiYa!" And she charged.

Ranma pulled her! "Speed up! I can still read you!" And it continued that way with every move she made. Her sensei wouldn't always pull some part of her; sometimes, they'd be pushed; sometimes a move would be blocked and physically adjusted to millimeters. In the end, she was worn out more than she would have if she had been in a 10K race. Ranma even knew how she should breathe to get the benefits of aerobics while fighting.

"You're doin' okay. Not great, yet, but _okay_. It won't be long. You do have the Talent. Maybe we can get to some mid-air techniques soon."

"Really?!" Akane glowed from more than just her sweat.

"Really," her friend replied. Then, "Come on, let's take a shower. We have to get dressed for school"

"And don't forget there's breakfast!" Both their stomachs growled at the same time. Both laughed at the same time

[][][]

"I had some dreams about you last night," the nude redhead said, on her knees, washing Akane's back.

"Oh, you, uh, did," the girl drew her body closer together on hearing that; she didn't try to cover herself but felt aware enough of her bared body to think about it. "Was I, was I, uh...like this?"

"Only when I have a girl brain. And then the other girls don't got clothes on, too."

"Uh, um, what about your boy brain?"

"You have clothes on. They're that _Juliet_ costume you liked so much."

"Really(!)?!" a huge grin spread across her face. And her body relaxed as much as the goosebumps from the cold water allowed.

"Well,...one time we traded clothes. It was a dream. They fit us."

"Ranma, you've told me many of your truths. I'd like to tell you one of mine. I have something of a curse, too. Not like yours…. Maybe likes yours. When I was six, our class did its own version of Romeo and Juliet."

"Do they do that in, what grade would that be?"

"My first-grade class did it because of one of the other girls was the high-and-mighty type who somehow got her way all the time. If she wanted to be _Juliet_ , she was _Juliet_. She needed a _Romeo_ , and she chose _me!_ And, and…."

"And?" Wherever this was going, it was upsetting to Ranma's friend. She scooted around so they could see each other's face.

"You know how- No, you probably don't know." Her eyes took on a distant look. "It's easier for people in the Western part of the world. They're so used to them kisses don't mean as much to them as kisses do here, in the East."

"She made you kiss her?! Why, that's, that's like a guy makin' _me_ kiss him!"

"She was only six! _I_ was only six! It didn't mean what it would mean now!" she insisted. Until she bowed her head and sadly said, "But it was still my first kiss."

[][][]

They were dressed in their school uniforms and coming into the common room still talking about Akane's truth. "...So, even after tryin' to be in all of those plays, somethin' always happened that fouled things up, even humiliate you? Geez! Maybe it is a curse."

"I'm stubborn! I still want to be an actress. But being the "Hentai Hater" limits the parts I get. I'm never offered a romantic part."

"You mean a kissin' part, right? The answer's simple. Just get them to let you kiss me."

"That's not funny, Ranma! People already think I might be a lesbian! And it's ALL because of my first kiss!" she was outraged.

"But you were six, you said!"

"But people grow up," Nabiki said. She had heard Akane go on about her tragedy too many times before to have interrupted and encouraged more of the same. But this was the entertaining part. "That girl who "forced her way" onto my dear, sweet Little Sister kept up her reputation for liking to kiss girls. In fact, most of the girls she chose ended up kissing girls, too. The girl seems to have an eye for identifying "that kind of girl". And so, of course, she now goes to an all-girls school, St. Bacchus."

"St...Bacchus?" It didn't sound Japanese.

"I _was_ going to tell you her name, but the temptation to tell naive, little you who Bacchus is is too great for me to pass up. Bacchus was the god of wine and orgies. Oh, you don't know what an orgy is either. They're wild parties that can become totally out of control. They don't have to but they definitely can include sex. And there's one more thing about that god. This might especially interest you, Ranma. He sometimes dressed as a girl. Being a god, he probably _could_ become a girl."

"Is that why a girl's school chose to call itself Bacchus?"

"Maybe. But, now, I want to get to the good part. The identity of the girl who ravished young Akane in first grade and left her scarred for life."

"I'm not listening! I'm not listening!" cried Akane, her hands over her ears. "I won't believe you! Kasumi's not the one who can deny things she doesn't want to hear!"

Nabiki motioned for Ranma to move closer and said in a lowered voice, "Kodachi has forgotten about Akane, but her brother hasn't. What began as an interest in Akane because of his sibling rivalry has grown out of all proportion. Snowballed. He defeating Akane has become something of a mania and informs on how he should treat other girls."

"This Kodachi's brother is one of the hentai horde that attacks her, then?"

"You still haven't figured it out. Good thing you're great at tactics because you're lousy at the kind of thinking that strategy depends on. Here's another clue. Because he can't defeat Akane, he now says he wins because she has to date him if she defeats him."

"She _has_ to date him because he loses? That's crazy! That's - _Kuno!_ "

"Bravo! General Mu Lan has figured it out." Nabiki was prepared to go on and say things like, it was because of that one kiss between six-year-old girls, ' _Romeo'_ developed an over-sensitivity to being viewed as a boy, and, thus, an uncute tomboy, with a suggestion (via that kiss) she may prefer girls, which meant, to her, they thought she was a pervert, which challenged her to prove she wasn't a pervert by attacking perverts. All this also led to her terrible taste in clothes, which had to be no-style dresses and no pants. Nabiki was prepared, but didn't. It was because of the way Ranma was eating.

Little Brother would have been done and finished with his breakfast before her paragraph on St. Bacchus was finished. But here Little Sister was, taking her time to eat. Not because she meant to, not because she was taking the time to savor her food, but because she _was_ interested in the details of Akane's life. Her friend. If Nabiki had gone on, Ranma might resent Akane to the extent she detested Kuno, son and father, and, no doubt, when he met her, Kodachi. For her history with them was quite tangled. Especially, Tatewaki. He had a crush on her because he had a crush on Akane when she had, literally, crushed him just as he was having his sexual awakening. His male identity was imprinted with her stamp. Was he a masochist? No, not really. But like so many people with real power, he craved to be dominated at least part of the time. So, should Akane and Ranma be dominatrixes? Part of the time, maybe. But all of the time? The Kunos were time bombs. Playing into their dom/sub games would not diffuse the bombs.

[][][]

Mr, Tendo was late coming to breakfast. His routine schedule had been thrown off by Ranma and Akane using the shower at a different time, and for longer, than they had before. But he was ready to get back into his routine of having breakfast and reading the newspaper and, a new routine, being with his own friend after the school children had left. There was a problem with this added routine.

"Ranma? Where is your father, Genma? You did have a sparring match this morning." Then he became concerned and looked to see if there was a panda hanging by its ankles from the tree. "You did not _do_ something to him as you did before?!"

"Ha! He wishes! He has a new job with the Doc. And the Doc came and made sure he got to work."

"Well, that was considerate of the physician, I am sure. But why would he come this early and personally for him?"

"Because I called him, Father," Kasumi smiled, gathering up the remains of the breakfast.

"Y,You, Kasumi, dear?" With fear in his eyes, Soun turned to Ranma for confirmation, or, hopefully, not.

"Last thing I saw of the panda, it was twisted up in a complicated yoga position and bein' rolled away by the Doc. The Doc really _is_ a very good martial artist. He knows things even I don't know. AND Pop!" Ranma finally was laughing.

[][][]

The three schoolgirls were on their way to school. "I wouldn't stay too long at the clinic," Nabiki advised her 'two' Little Sisters. "Megumi and her girls are probably waiting to walk through the gates with you, again. Of course, if they are _too_ upset, I'll just mention the school records I bought from Ikuko. It's been interesting reading."

"Why don't you join the Truce Enforcement Club?" Ranma asked. "They probably give that kinda info out to members."

"Ranma!" Akane said in a warning voice.

"I can't join because I date," Nabiki said nonchalantly.

"You mean you're _not helpin'_ the other girls?! You _don't care_ if there's a truce or not?!"

"Oh, I care. And I help out in my own way. I'm sort of what you might call the safety valve of the pressure cooker that's all that male need." Then she smiled, "And it's very profitable!"

"Ranma, don't go any further. You don't need to know." Akane had to wonder - because the way her mind worked - what the neo-girl would think if she knew about compensated dating. Was she the kind to "sell her body" if she needed the money? Enjo-kousai wasn't prostitution, but it often led to it or worse. Akane knew her sister had escorted a boy when she returned with packages her "date" had bought her. But, so far, so far as she knew, none of them were the expensive kind she would expect from an adult with real money. Nabiki said she was saving herself for the big investment. The boys were just practice.

[][][]

Despite everything her Old Man had done to her, he was still her pop and she sort of had to love him. That's why she was tuned in on her trained senses as they came to the clinic with the sign that read, moxibustion/chiropractic. The loud snap, crackle and pops the loving daughter heard coming from inside was satisfying.

"I apologize, Mr. Saotome!" Dr. Tofu said as he realigned the bones in the human body he was trained for.

"Soun was right about you," Genma frowned as his dislocated shoulder became located.

"Just face it, Pop, the Doc's just a better martial artist than you."

"He is not. I was just surprised."

"You mean you left yourself wide open! _Ha!_ What have you always told me about lettin' your guard down?" Ranma sneered. "Hey, Doc! You got a regular sparring partner? My Old Man could use a good sensei."

[][][]

"Free! Free! Free!" Ranma cried, her arms and bookbag in the air. "No more sparring too early in the morning!"

"What about me?" Akane asked.

"Aw, we can do that whatever time we have." And the bookbag came down towards her. Alane blocked it, frowning. Until she saw her friend smiling. "But, if you want to, we can do it in the morning."

"Not too early," Nabiki suggested. "I'm more the night owl." And after she graduated, she could be more the night-life owl.

[][][]

They were surprised to not see Megumi, Yasushi or Ayane standing at the last corner before the school gate. "Where do you think they are?" Akane asked.

"It's going to ruin my plan if it continues. Then there _will_ be no money-back guarantee. Of course, I haven't had much of a chance to talk with bandage-boy Kuno. I still have to sell him on the idea of getting to you, Akane, through your 'best friend' Megumi."

Ranma's hands, and bookbag, were behind her head as she walked along. "I wonder who'll be at the gate today? Kuno or the Hentai Horde. It was their turn yesterday, so I guess…."

Kuno was waiting at the gate, alright. The dad, Kaneto Kuno. Having no bandages showed that the tan was still there, but he was now dressed in an ornate Maharaja outfit. It was gaudy, but for a man so rich he practically owned the whole town, it looked like it had been rented from a cheap costume shop.

Ranma's hands were no longer casually behind her head. She prepared herself for action. To get her hands free, she tried to pass her bookbag off to Akane. When her back-up didn't take it, she glanced over her shoulder. Akane had a tight grip on Nabiki, forcing her to come with them.

Ranma got Akane's bag and made the non-combatant to carry all three of their bags. Now, she was ready for the fight!

Suddenly two girls ran past the waiting man and out of the gate. "Nabiki! Nabiki, you're finally here! This is it! This is the Big Jackpot!"

"Who?" the redhead asked.

"They're Kikuko and Ryonami," Akane told her. "They work for Nabiki and her Vulcan Enterprises."

Ranma and Akane were getting their bookbags back before they could react as Nabiki rushed to meet her friends and minions.

"Great! Fantastic! What's the angle?!"

"Betting! We're taking book on the battle!"

Nabiki looked disappointed. "Who's going to bet that the HeadcaseMaster is going to beat Ranma _or_ Akane!? Not even Tate-Wacky himself is going to side with his daddy! We'll lose money!"

"That's not the battle!" Ryonami said.

"It's _The Battle of the Sexes! Boys versus Girls!_ " Kikuko said.

And Ryonami looked at Ranma and Akane. "And it's all because of them - The Truce is over!"


	8. Chapter 10 To the Victor, a Kiss

An unusual disclaimer: Ranma ½ is a trademark of Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ Communications, and its characters have been borrowed without permission. And Son Turned Daughter was originally written way back in 2002 by the FanFiction author Tangent, and his characters Megumi, Yasushi and Ayane have, likewise, been borrowed without permission. _Please_ see the first two chapters of this story under _his_ pen name. This story is written for non-commercial purposes only.

[][][] [][][] [][][]

"The Truce is over?" Ranma repeated.

"How is it _our_ fault?!" Akane demanded of the two girls.

But Ryonami looked back to Nabiki, "You didn't hear?! The was a riot after the assembly yesterday!"

"It was the Hentai Horde that started it!" Kikuko also looked mainly at their leader. "They didn't like that the Truce Enforcement Club wouldn't sell them raffle tickets."

"The raffle tickets?" Nabiki instantly understood. " _Only_ those who've never fought Akane were allowed to buy a chance to date her or Ranma!"

"They had the list, of course!" Ryonami nodded.

"Ikuko says they're not giving into the _male_ troublemakers!" Kikuko said. "The Club's going ahead and have the raffle drawing!"

" _Male_ troublemakers!?" Akane did not like the implication.

Nabiki looked at the tall, tan owner of Furinkan High School dressed as a Maharaja still standing patiently at the gate. "When is the raffle drawing?! Where?!"

As soon as school is over! On the sports field!"

"Where the bleachers are!"

Nabiki nodded, "This is Saturday. There's only half a day of classes." And she remembered something from the old, to her ancient, movie Westerns she had researched, "Noon: The Showdown begins at High Noon!"

"The Truce Enforcers are tough!" Kikuko said. "Even in the middle of a battle, they're still selling tickets!"

"Any two of them could do what Ranma or Akane did to the hentai!"

"Ikuko is nearly as tough as the Hentai Hater herself!"

"They're good but not that good," Ranma said, not thinking that she was complimenting her friend. It was an honest assessment of the girls' battle aura potentials. But it thrilled Akane. Now she _had_ to prove her sensei right!

"Why are we waiting!?" the only long-haired girl among them challenged the others. "If we don't hurry, we'll be late to school!"

[][][]

"You bachche are right on time! I am very much glad to see you attending my school. I did think that you might not after dhat museebat of assembly!" Kuno's dad said in his fake Hindi accent. "But there is now dje new school rule added. For bachche not to be in detention after school, and miss raffle, bachche must bow."

"I ain't bowin' to you!" Ranma yelled, her fist ready to punch. She was relieved that whatever that something was that had made her obey the pigtail-cutter yesterday wasn't there today. Two attacks on her by him seemed to have been enough to convince that Something she didn't have to give in to the idiot.

"I bam dhe Maharaja of Furinkan and of Nerima and of my financial empire. All Kisaan bow to dheir Maharaja. But bachche need not bow to dheir beloved and forgiving Maharaja. No, dhat not be to whom bachche must bow." And he stepped aside.

His tall, wide body in the voluminous costume-rental had been blocking the view of the statue in the middle of the path to the main entrance of the school. It was the kind that Ranma would have thought of if she ever thought of Indian statues, it was "dancing" on one foot and had four arms. She thought it was a slim but muscular woman (she _had_ seen Shampoo's amazons), but then noticed it didn't have boobs. "Bachche must bow to Great God Shiva!"

"Shiva?"

"Shiva is one of the three supreme gods of Hinduism," Nabiki informed them. "He is the god of destruction and transformation."

"Bachche see? Shiva is not forgiving bachche like dheir beloved Maharaja."

"I _also_ said he was the god of transformation. That's your kind of god, Ranma."

"A god of destruction is a god for martial artists," Ryonami commented.

"Okay! I will do it!" Ranma yelled and pulled Akane with her towards the statue, the others following.

"You're right, Ranma. I hate it, too. But we have to be at the raffle when our club gives our dates to the winners. We gave our word!"

The frowning Ranma said nothing more...until she stopped directly in front of the statue. As she bowed, she made her hands come together in prayer swiftly, precisely, and said, "Namaste!" loudly - And the cheap, plaster statue crumbled before the shockwaves!

But before it had crumbled, Nabiki had forced the surprised Akane to bow along with her. Technically, they _did_ do the required bowing.

"The god of destruction is destroyed," Ryonami commented.

[][][]

As they entered the school, they heard music with an Indian feel about it being played over the school's PA system. Nabiki explained it was Tantric music with a modern beat. Both were associated with sex. But she could tell them anything more, as she and her friends had to hurry to class before the late bell.

And so did Ranma and Akane.

They saw Ikuko as well as Akiko, Umeko and Emiko canvassing the halls and entering and leaving the classrooms, racing the bell, too. The President of the Truce Enforcement Club looked at her watch. "Time!" she announced. Umeko and Emiko leaped out of the third-floor window and used their portable grappling hooks to swing down to their classroom on the second floor. Akiko just leaped down the stairwell, bypassing the railings and landings.

"Don't be late!" she ordered Ranma and Akane, holding up the tickets she had sold that morning for the prizes to see.

She was about to enter classroom 1-F when a boy yelled: "147,000 yen!" But Ikuko ignored the hockey player rollerblading down the hall at her. "I won all the money the boys had in our class! 147,000!" Ikuko went into the class. "I _will_ get a ticket!" He caromed a puck off the wall across the hall from the door. Ranma raced to stop it in case it might hit the girl.

It bounced off an invisible forcefield and the redhead had to drastically change directions! She kicked it straight back at the attacker! It hit him in the mask so hard it nearly stopped his forward movement.

But he did stop.

His next puck was aimed directly at the redhead in the Furinkan girl's uniform. She kicked it back. Again it struck him in the mask! Another puck, another to the mask! It was cracking. The next one broke the mask! His hockey stick slapped yet another puck at Ranma.

"Enough!" she cried, stomping on it. "At least, _try_ to protect yourself with that big stick of yours!"

"One more time!" he pleaded. "I have my mask _off_ , now!" Why was he focusing on Ranma? Why were his eyes so big? Akane asked herself. She didn't like the possible answer.

" _Ranma!_ " Akane lifted the back of Ranma's skirt. "You did: You _didn't!_ "

The hockey player now sped down the hall at the girl without panties.

Akane shoved the stupid-at-being-a girl through the classroom door. The curve of his stick came around for her throat to at least snag _this_ prize!

Akane made it past the invisible barrier just in time! The non-player player banged his stick impotently against it! It was only then that the long-haired girl realized that there _was_ a forcefield.

On the windows of the classroom, both those facing the outside and those facing the hallway, were five-pointed stars, pentagrams. A much larger one was drawn in chalk on the floor in the middle of the room. One one side of the room, a barrier of desks had been formed. The girls were behind _that_ one.

Akane wasn't the only one confused. "Let me explain," their homeroom and Japanese History teach said. "My hobby is studying Onmyodo. I know enough on the subject to protect this room."

"You talkin' about magic(!)?!" Ranma was _not_ happy. She _did not like_ magic.

Koyama-sensei went on say more, but he was doing it in a way that sounded like a boring lesson. That was how Hiroshi and Daisuke were able to get her attention.

"See, Ranma?!" , "Yeah, see!" , "We're not so bad!" , "Yeah! The magic only keeps out hentai!" , "We're not perverts!"

"It only means you're not _violent_ boys," Ikuko told them. "You're still full of the wrong kind of male hormones!"

"Are there good kinds of male hormones?" Ranma hoped there were. The answer, though, was probably in who was on the guy side of the classroom, four. Hiroshi and Daisuke were there, in middle of, quote "no-man's land", so that made there were only six teen boys that the girls could trust. And these weren't guys girls would be thrilled about dating. Especially that painfully thin, sick-looking guy. The guy with the onmyo doll looked like he didn't _have_ any hormones.

"Ranma!" Akane called for her attention. "Come over here with the girls!"

"Okay." But the closer the redhead came to it, the harder it was for her to move. It came to feel like she was trying to wade through thick molasses.

Hiroshi and Daisuke grabbed her arms and insisted on escorting her away. "We see you really don't want to be with the girls." , "The magic tells us you would rather be with us boys." , "Don't fight it - Please don't fight, Ranma." , "Yeah, you're a girl who _likes_ boys!"

Ranma had to admit she had less trouble being moved over to the boys' side.

There came a loud, banging like metal against concrete. Then, with one last groan, the pipes in the ceiling broke! Cold water crashed down into the classroom! Ranma was drenched, Hiroshi and Daisuke were drenched. But, strangely, everybody else only became damp. The magic chalk drawing, though, was washed away.

The hockey and an American-football player crashed through the door and a hall window. The redhead was instantly ready to fight them: "Look, Boys!" she said, lifting the front of her skirt.

The inside of football player's visor became splattered with his own nose blood. Her opponent blinded, Ranma kicked him up against the charging hockey player. Grabbing the stick, she forced both of them to back out of the classroom and into the hall and then out the window on the other side: Crash! Their pads had better work: It was three stories down.

Meanwhile, the girls behind their no longer magically protected barrier were saying, "So that's the kind of girl the redhead is!"

"She's _not like that!_ " Akane insisted. "It's for tactical advantage _Only!_ "

"You're a martial artist! Would _you_ do that?"

"W,would...I?"

"Akane _is_ the redhead's friend." The innuendo was heavy. (How bisexual _was_ she?)

The Hentai Hater who would feel like _dying_ if any boy saw her polka dot panties also was asking herself, How good of a friend was she? Could she do it, if her friend needed her to do it?

"Akane!" Ranma yelled, "Stay here and take charge! I gotta go to the girls lockers and get my bloomers!"

"Bloomers!" Hiroshi and Daisuke cried for joy at the thought of seeing her wearing this fetish!

"Ranma! You should have worn panties in _the first place!_ "

"No panties!" Hiroshi and Daisuke cried from another, better, joyful thought.

"I didn't _have_ no more clean panties!" She yelled as she dashed away. She didn't have _any_ panties of her own. All of the ones she had worn so far had been borrowed.

"See!" Akane practically yelled at the girls with her. "There's an explanation!"

"She still showed her goodies." , "She could have worn those boxers of her."

"Ranma doesn't think like us, yet! She thought you didn't want to see her in boxers!"

Ranma's counselor, Dr. Tofu, would later add another explanation why the redhead was without panties. It had to do with her trauma of days ago when "everybody" saw she was a "natural redhead".

Meanwhile, Hiroshi and Daisuke were drooling. They wished they had nosebleeds!

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Tantric erotic love music with a beat continued to be playing over the school's PA system. The Headmaster acted as its DJ. "Hear dhe Music of Lord Shiva! Surrender to dhe Small Death! Unite souls and bodies! School library now have many, many Kamasutra!..."

Ranma was so tuned in on what needed to be done as a fighter, she really wasn't listening to him. She knew the "Maharaja" was as fake as his title! Whatever the HeadcaseMaster thought he was doing, there was no real magic behind it. It was her guess the only motive the school owner had was finding different ways to force his students to practice all-out martial arts without having the wagers that went along with challenges. Furinkan, after all, specialized in the Art in all its forms. But that might be _too sensible_ a reason for a Kuno!

So Ranma headed down the halls, passing classrooms without teachers who knew magic. She was glad to see that there were not only boys who had fighting skills at Furinkan. But she understood there were probably more boys than girls with them. That meant one side of this Battle of the Sexes outpowered the other, figuratively and literally. It was unfair! Ranma's whole life - even before Jusenkyo - had been unfair! Girl brain or guy brain, she knew _which_ side she had to be on! The mission of a _true_ martial artist is to protect the weak!

If the girls were weak, did that make _her_ weak, too? No, that would make her idiot pop right! She, would, not, let, that, _happen!_

The pigtailed girl continued on, her trained senses alert! Martial arts techniques were being used everywhere! They flooded and threatened to overwhelm her ingrained desire to master anything-goes! The sports-based styles were ones she had seen or would have understood and improvised on her own once she had learned the _game sense_ of each. (Though she hadn't thought of ballet as a sport until now. She could make it _even more_ effective combining its with her own mid-air techniques!) But what really got her bujutsu juices flowing were the anything-goes ones with a _girl sense_ , techniques she wouldn't even have considered if she weren't practicing at being a girl. Her guy brain would _never_ have thought of using makeup as weapons, or if he had confronted a practitioner in its arcane art believed it could be so effectively used in combat. Especially against guys! More than one male lost his male pride if not manhood against foundation, rouge, mascara, and/or lipstick! (Not that she knew the names of these beauty products. Yet.) She wondered if her guy brain could handle the techniques' effects! What would any friends Ranma have think of a guy who did?!

Then there were the others! Like martial arts hair styling! ( _Brr!_ Remembering what the Headmaster had done to her pigtail yesterday still made her blood freeze!) Or martial arts seamstressing (more than just pins and threads were involved). Or martial arts hatmaking (military millinery)! Or martial arts footwear (such as those with honed stilettos!) Martial arts cleaning (Kasumi _had_ to know those!). Martial arts cooking (Nabiki said nobody could match Akane in making weapons out of food)! Then there were the even more obscure ones she could only guess at giving a name for, like one that used clothes hangers and fancy boxes.

But for all that, and more, the student of the _Anything-Goes_ school was more interested in the unarmed techniques. Her mind was a sponge when it came to those kinds of actions! She only had to be exposed to it once and she could duplicate the moves. And if she could incorporate it into the choreographed patterns of her katas, they would stick, not to be lost, that was, of course, as long as she periodically refreshed and reinforced them. And what her mind was really alive to were the ways girls could use their bodies that guys - like she could be - could not, would not, or maybe should not use.

The pigtailed girl immediately started using some of them whenever she came across a girl or three who didn't have the skills or lack of inhibitions or just plain exhibitionistic streak to be a successful fighter. All it took was for a boy's eyes to fall on her now overly jiggly boobs, ass and other womanly parts and the girl they were trying to corner could slip away from the mesmerized adolescents. Most of the time she was gone before they could move again. She and Ranma.

The hardcore hentai attacked! But her hips would wiggle-wiggle and not be where he thought they should be when he reached for them. A hip-fake and he would miss her entirely, then a hip-bump sent the stumbling boys onto the floor. As he tried to get up, she would stomp on him and be on her way again. His only reward was a peek up her skirt. Their nosebleed was often enough to weaken them so they were virtually helpless against the girls who immediately ganged up on him, trampling and beating him with anything-goes.

A ballroom dancer took her by the arm while she was looking in the wrong direction. Before she knew it, her balance was thrown completely off! As it was, without a proper balance, it was difficult at best to attack properly in her usual style, but she was experimenting with other styles. She couldn't shift her approaches as fast as the expert in martial arts tango made her move in another way, again throwing her balance off, again and again! All to a Tantra beat. He would win by giving her a disabling vertigo!

There was only one thing she could do. "Hhi, Hhoney. Hhaving fhun?" Her hot breath fogged up his glasses and he tripped over her foot. Then he had no glasses, as she raced on, bent over, trying not to puke - and banged her head up against a hard, six-pack set of abs!

A boxer stood in her way. She kept her fists down. "You would hit _this_ cute face?!" His gloves lowered. She raised her fists.

But a wrestler grabbed them from behind. She leaped! Her braless, 34C boobs bobbed the boxer in his glassjaw and he was knocked out with a smile on his face. Meanwhile, her bare feet pushed off the falling body and used the momentum to propel her ass into the face of the wrestler. He fell backward, crashing to the floor and was pinned, briefly, by the girl sitting on his face. Then he, too, passed out with a smile.

A rugby scrum of eight completely blocked the hall. They wanted possession of the redhead! She leaped! But the back four jumped on the backs of the front three and the eighth man on top spread his waving hands, ready to grab her in whichever direction she went. In fact, they all had their hands out and eager to molest. The boy and even the girl in Ranma cringed. She might puke, after all.

A mid-air shift of her weight and she was on her way to sliding under the legs of the center. Her hands were quicker than his: she knocked them aside and yanked down his uniform shorts and jockstrap! The center immediately went to pull them up. The man on top of him lost his balance and toppled into those next to him and they all fell! The scrum became a dogpile!

Sliding in a skirt was something that should only be done by a woman who knew how to be professional about it, Ranma discovered. Nothing covered her below the waist! She wiped out all of the boys of the nearest classroom by giving them nosebleeds, but there was more. Many more! There apparently weren't many virgins among the boys of Track and Field! But taking care of them _wasn't_ taking care of those who were attacking girls who really needed her fighting skills!

She slammed open the nearest window and jumped. The wind caught her skirt as she went down and, again, she was completely exposed below her waist! But it was only until she landed expertly on the ground outside the school building.

Those trained fielders who could jump did. Setting herself, she used their own momentum to toss them at the boys _outside_ who were now coming towards her!

Then she ran out of boys coming down. But not those coming towards!

"Leave that girl alone, you cads!" a boy called out in a threatening voice. The boys didn't pay him any attention.

Until he knocked nine down like bowling pins with the hookshot of his tumbling umbrella. There was still enough of his power in it for the umbrella to roll half-way back to its owner.

The remaining boys stopped their attack on the little redhead to look at the boy in the yellow bandana as he walked up to what looked like a bamboo bandana and lifted it up. It closed. He pointed it at the boy closest to the lone girl. "I don't think you should get any closer. In fact," he said as his umbrella included all the boys, "I think you should all leave."

It was him. Ranma recognized him from the night she went out with Akane and her sisters. She was in a girl's kimono and getas...and Kasumi had said something about boys repairing a girl's geta was an omen. And her pop believed in things like that, the more insignificant anything that happened was, the more it allowed a powerful significance to be shown. Her pop was an idiot.

"He's one of those traitors who've gone over to the girls' side!" . "He thinks going soft is going to get him some softness!" , "He doesn't have a uniform!" , "Let's show the trespasser what the Alpha Male Club is all about!" And the weightlifters and bodybuilders charged as fast as their over-developed muscles allowed them to. He merely stood there.

His umbrella opened and it was used to shove one of the brawny guys back several yards. The palm of his free hand shoved the massive pecs of a second, which propelled him into a third. These three landed only a yard away, but they bumped against others which caused a domino effect, sending them all to the ground. The butt end of the umbrella handle then hit the stomach of the one attacking from his rear. The guy keeled over, but before he could puke, bandana boy hit his face with the back of his elbow, sending him backward, away from him and his rough but durable traveling clothes. They was soiled enough.

Ranma stood there, studying the guy from two days ago. He was about the _strongest_ boy her age she had ever met! It was his weakness. He lacked the agility her martial arts school had trained into her. His techniques were mainly upper body, basically using his fists and a hand-held weapon. Even as a small girl, she was sure she could take him on with blocks, and well-placed blows with both her hands _and_ feet. Not that she expected to. Her training had her size up _anybody_ who she saw fighting.

His very muscular foes fallen in a circle around him, the boy with the yellow bandana with - Ranma's trained senses told her - his steel umbrella carefully stepped between the bodies. He did not need to add insult to injury as Ranma might have. Here was a genuine gentleman, her girl brain told her.

"Are you alright, Miss? You're that kind girl that told me about Furinkan, aren't you? I recognize you by the red hair and pigtail."

"Yeah. I'm okay." The redhead noticed he was looking at _her_ and not at her too girl body. Like the first time he saw her. "You didn't see nothin', did you?"

"I saw you being attacked when I came around the corner. It is unforgivable for these ruffians to assault a small, helpless girl like you!"

No, he hadn't seen anything. It was her assessment that he saw her _after_ her skirt was down in place and after the fielders had stopped coming. He saw her before any of the muscle-heads had gotten within her hitting range. Still, he failed to wonder why there were scattered bodies on the ground that he hadn't been responsible for putting there.

"Helpless girl!" Ranma remembered that she had to get her bloomers and get back to defending the born-girls who weren't capable martial artists! "I've got to run!" She held up her hand in a goodbye and took off!

"Could you tell me how to find Ran-" He wasn't allowed to finish because a bowling ball had been dropped on top of his head from a couple of stories up. The ball split and fell in two pieces and he was left with a huge lump.

So, that's why he wanted to find this high school so badly! Ranma thought. He was looking for a girl named Ran, _Orchid._ Probably his girlfriend. And so the girl that thought of her Ran as _Wild_ continued on.

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She met Megumi, Yasushi and Ayane as they were coming out of the girls locker room wearing their gym bloomers and t-shirts. "You have the same idea, too, Ranma!"

"Skirts can get in the way!" Megumi agreed.

"Like pants," Yasushi added. "I like naked legs."

"I don't have the time to change out of -Wait! You said naked!" Ranma stared at Yasushi's and then the other's legs. "What else can you girls make naked?"

"Hear that!" Megumi commanded her girls. "Ranma's right! Tie the shirts up and let the boys see our midriffs!"

"It'll also help to draw their attentions to our tits, too!" Ayane understood.

"Great! I'll do that, too!" Ranma said as she hurried inside to change. The redhead had learned a valuable lesson. For all the short-term tactical benefits of going without panties, that was a huge strategic mistake in the long-term. (Like Track-and-Fielders and Weightlifters and Bodybuilders attacking you when they might not have if you _did_ have panties on.) It brought more trouble than it was worth! Better to get into the bloomers! And t-shirt. And show the belly.

[][][]

"Now, where do I go?!" the redhead in wearing her gym clothes in a way that went against the Dress Code. There was very little left to do to maximize how much of her silky flesh could be shown _without_ being naked. But, she was sure, if she had the time, she could think of a way to give the guys _more_ eye candy.

How could she find the most number of girls that needed her help?! Her answer was to do what she did the best: She took to the air!

She leaped from outside window sill to one outside window sill. It made little difference to her if they were on the same floor or not. Jumping up to the story above or down, she could do them both just as well, especially since she was in bare feet. Of course, she had to use some of her energies to deal with their pains or heal cuts.

She looked through the outside windows into the halls and, also, across and through the windows of the classrooms. What she saw did not please her need for action, but in every other way, she was glad. The girls seemed to be holding their own for the most part. Those that were non-combatants had either gotten behind girls that could and would fight or had formed a phalanx bristling with brooms, mops, teachers pointers, hook poles, even cue sticks and anything else long they could hold out as something pointy out in front, to the sides or in back of the group.

Also pleasing was the number of "traitors", boys who seemed to actually be on the side of the girls against their "own kind". Chivalry was not dead because Japan never had chivalry. There once was a time when women were better thought of, and miko and kunoichi were still echoes of that time, but that time was more than a millennium ago when they were defeated by foreign influences. Only in modern times were women even allowed to carry their family names. Before, they were the property-to-be of their future family. The idea that they could live outside a family, capable of doing, perhaps, just about whatever a born-male could do was even more recent. Even now, a minority of Japanese with the determination and money to sway, if not jujitsu their culture, insisted on propagating fantasies that could put women in weird, WTF situations and dilemmas. And, so, the Old Man's lack of respect for the opposite sex was a reflection of that kind of regard his greater culture had towards those born females. All this Ranma did not really understand directly as a guy, but her girl brain was absorbing this from being on the receiving end! So she was _thrilled_ to see any example of her sensei pop being wrong, _and_ the stereotype of guys having to be perverts being wrong!

" _En garde!_ Have at you, varlet!" Tatewaki Kuno cried. Ranma looked down to see which sex he was fighting - When a school desk was thrown both the classroom and the hall windows and knocked her from her third-floor perch!

Recovering, Ranma got the falling desk under her. She would have to time what she had to do carefully. She shoved the desk onto the ground, it rebounded back up, she transferred that momentum into her body and used it to slow her fall. She could now lightly step on the table and-

"It is a curse you should not fight, my moon-lit Juliet!" Kuno said, grabbing her around her waist.

"Let go of me, you…, you…." No! The Something was back! _WHY?!_ She hadn't stolen anything from him, or received a gift from him, or - That kiss! He _had_ made the school's hot water heater give hot water for her. And he had done it because she had promised to kiss him - But she _hadn't_ given him a _real_ kiss! She had even _said it_ herself it didn't count if she did it on bandages! She hadn't paid! Theft! She was screwed! Or would be.

Or would she? Kuno, the "knight protecting his damsel" *Gag* was facing off against guys! And they were the boys from his very own kendo club! They were wearing the heavy padding, gloves and face masks of modern kendo-as-a-sport. Against these armored shinai wielders, Kuno was just in his typical kendo-gi. He was screwed.

Good! Once they defeated him, she could defeat _them!_ That Something wouldn't make her submit to them ...would it?

But he had a wooden sword! They had split-bamboo swords. His bokken had an edge. Their shinais were blunt. His had a point. Theirs padded tips, He was their captain. He was better than they were. He knew each of his fellow club members' weaknesses and strengths, Even with her further handicapping him by his keeping a tight grip on her, he was winning the battle. -Worse! He was actually showing intelligence!

Those with bamboo swords he did not break or split further faced the gale-force blasts from his bokken being moved so rapidly! The wind got under their armor, lifting them away from their bodies. If the straps weren't fastened properly or were too weak from use to come loose or break, Kuno, knowing kendo armor so intimately, would use the point or edge of his sword to cut whatever held the padding or mask to his opponents bodies! One by one, the armors fell. One by one their kendo-gis were torn and shredded. Half of them were left in their boxers or fundoshi. Those that still had something more on had that something more only because they chose to be the first to flee.

"I am victorious, of course!" Kuno declared. And the "hero" looked down into the eyes of his "adoring fan" as he adjusted her weight so his hold on her was more secure. In other words, only the bloomers were between her and his free hand. Ranma could only think of one thing to do.

"Keep the sword, senpai! Keep the sword!" so he didn't have _two_ hands to use on her body.

"But, of course, my maiden in distress!" And Ranma thought he was right, she was very much in distress. "Do you hear the Tantric music of love? Its pulse beats with our hearts! It is said to be able to join two hearts as one, to be forever linked to the extent that souls themselves are made one in a love that cannot perish.

"Now, does not the love interest traditionally reward her rescuer with a kiss? I wear no bandages to interfere this day."

His lips were coming closer - Closer! He hadn't rescued her, she screamed in her head! But the words did not reach her lips. There was no hope for-

Chomp!

"I have been bitten!" Kuno screamed.

Saved! Ranma screamed for joy inside. And it was a little, black pig that did it! Why? All she cared was that it had!

"You swine! How dare you attack during a love scene! I shall make bacon out of you!"

But the shouts and sword did not scare away the small animal. Instead, if anything, it got angrier! It bared its teeth in a piggish growl, "Bwee-rrrr!" And leaped!

It found any hoof-hold it could before jumping higher on the bokken baka's body. It was too close for Kuno's sword to get good aim at or strike against it, but that didn't stop the - back to being an idiot - samurai from trying. Again and again. The pig would even jump onto the back of the sword and then use it to leap back at Kuno! Each of its little hoof-prints carried damage points.

Ranma found herself dropped to the ground as the kendoist went to use _both_ of his hands.

But by that time it was too late. One last pitter-patter and Kuno toppled, face down and defeated.

"Bwee?" the creature squealed in a 180 change of emotion, not understanding why the barely dressed redheaded girl with the pigtail wanted to pick it up.

"You _are_ a guy!" she smiled. "Akane said the first kiss was too important. The way my luck's been going, Kuno's going to be my first kiss. Never!"

The cute girl, then, smiled, "You're the one who rescued me."

And Ranma gave her first kiss to a guy who was a little, black, pig.


	9. Chapter 11 The Lysistrata Rule Is Over

An unusual disclaimer: Ranma ½ is a trademark of Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ Communications, and its characters have been borrowed without permission. And Son Turned Daughter was originally written way back in 2002 by the FanFiction author Tangent, and his characters Megumi, Yasushi and Ayane have, likewise, been borrowed without permission. Please see the first two chapters of this story under his pen name. This story is written for non-commercial purposes only.

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While a pigtailed redhead, Ranma Saotome had actually done it! Her guy brain wouldn't be happy when she had it back, but, then, her girl brain wasn't thrilled to have actually, truly, really done it, either. She had kissed a pig on its porky lips. Not his forehead. Not his snout. On its lips! Geez! Man! if a First Kiss was so freaking important, then she was determined that it not be with a guy! A guy guy, that was, a human guy! And especially _not_ by Kuno! By kissing a pig she had taken something important and made it unimportant! But maybe it would weaken the debt that Something seemed determined to make her pay Kuno! Maybe she had defeated _something_ of her curse!

Ranma could feel the little pig get suddenly warmer, her trained senses picking up a red glow beneath its bristly yet soft, black fur. "Are you getting a fever?" she asked, putting her forehead against its, her nose ending up near its snout. "Man, I'd like to help you for savin' me from Kuno, but I have girls of my own to rescue! And you might get in the way of my moves and get hurt. Sorry, uh…." It seemed right to give it a name. It deserved one for what it had done for her. But she didn't have any real time! It had to be the first thing she thought of! Bacon - No, a second thought, "Burin-chan.

"No, wait! You're a guy and I don't like to be called a _-chan_ , either." She set him down and patted him on his way by his little butt. "Bye, Burin _-kun!_ "

She didn't see Burin-kun stagger and collapse with a smile. It did not have a nosebleed.

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The redhead in the bloomers and the t-shirt tied up under her bust was on the run again!

She would check why that chair had been hurled so hard it had broken two windows separated by a hallway. In one leap, she was three stories up and on the sill of the window next to the outside hall window.

In the hall were two armies facing off. The girl army seemed to be made almost entirely of civilians, normally non-combatants who the Code required its adherents to keep that way for a number of sensible reasons. (And one that wasn't: [13] _Protection of all innocent lingerie!_ ) But their "general" wasn't a civvy; she was a martial artist, the best Ranma had seen in Nerima!

"Give me more desks, Shinobu!" Akane ordered.

"More desks!" the girl in shoulder-length hair cried out. And more desks were passed by a chain of girls, two girls for each desk, while girls on both sides of them protected them with anything-goes weapons, mostly of the long and pointy kind.

Shinobu would throw a desk if the other army made a move to attack before Akane could throw it. She was just about as strong as Akane, but she wasn't the trained martial artist.

Ranma rapped the window quickly, repeatedly, and at a certain angle, and the window that latched from the inside was no longer latched. "Akane!" she said, sliding it open.

"Ranma!" Akane smiled around her grunt as she threw yet another desk.

The redhead jumped inside and, having to reach, caught the desk with one hand.

"Ranma!? Akane was no longer smiling.

"Look!" and she wasn't talking to just one girl. "You're just creatin' a barrier to hide behind!" Although, there were a handful of boys buried under the pile of desks.

"That's what we _want!_ " And the normies agreed.

"But you're a small group! Stuck in a small part of the school! A part without a girls room!"

"I wish she hadn't said that!" more than one civvy said.

"You need to join up with the other girls in the school! Take control of the school! Win the war!"

"Ranma's right!" Akane told the others. "The more of us, the more _they_ have to respect us!"

"Yeah!" went the shout. There was only one small voice that said, "But what if they…."

"Where's Ikuko?!" Ranma demanded.

"She and the rest of the Truce Enforcement Club are making sure they control the bleachers in time for the raffle!" , "Is there even going to _be_ a raffle?!" , "That's defeatist talk!" , "Akane and Ranma _will_ go on those dates!" , "Yeah!", "Dates. When was the last time _we_ were on dates?"

This was sounding too much like the curse making sure she _did_ become a girl in more than just body to Ranma. But she had to go through with her date or break her word of honor. Would the curse help or hurt the chances of the girls winning?! "Then the bleachers are where you and all the other girls should meet up! Akane get them there!"

"M,me?" Suddenly she was faced with a great responsibility! The lives of, maybe, all of the school's girls depended on her!

"You can do it, General Mulan!"

"Are you calling me a boy!?" she reflexively yelled.

"Was Mulan a boy?" Ranma smiled and leaped out the window.

Wow! First the realization she should always try to wear something over her privates and now this helping Akane and the girls organize! Ranma was thinking strategically! She just hoped she wasn't as lousy at it as Nabiki thought she was.

Desks and broken window glass rained down as Akane and Shinobu removed the barrier! Screams were heard as girls met their group of boys head-on! Two armies clashed!

And the music of Shiva played on...

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Ranma in her abbreviated gym clothes started collecting any and all the girls she came across outside. Some were hiding in or behind the bushes, trees, posts, garbage cans, bookbags and some were not hiding at all, just clinging to each other and waiting to be captured or worse. She was the leader of about fifteen girls and Hiroshi, Daisuke and that scarecrow guy, Gosunkugi(? Was that his name? Why did she even bother caring if it was?), when they found a girl kneeling over a crystal ball. Girls recognized her, "Miyo!"

"What's she doing?" Ranma asked, and the low-grade perverts the girls of 1-F had earlier chased away answered.

"She's the school's fortuneteller," Daisuke said. "Thinks she's a psychic."

"She _did_ say I would get a kiss from you, Ranma," Hiroshi smiled.

"It wasn't a _real_ kiss! It wasn't my _first_ kiss!" Ranma desperately hoped she wasn't under a debt to him, too!

"Miyo! Miyo! What's going to happen?!" the girls rushed to her.

"I hear…, I hear…"

"Doesn't a fortuneteller say "I see"?" Daisuke asked. "She's has a crystal ball."

Miyo frowned at the skeptic. "I _hear._ There are subliminal messages aimed at the males in the music."

"Subliminwhat?" Ranma asked, scratching her head.

"It's like hypnotism," a girl Ranma recognized from her class told her. Being late for school cost her and her friend more than just detention.

"And don't forget the incense!" another from her class told them.

"I don't smell any incense." Ranma wasn't the only one.

"Believe Makoto," her very short-haired friend said. "She has a very sensitive nose."

"Shikako's right!" more than one girl agreed.

"You can't smell it because it smells like girls. Girls are always smelling girl," the girl with long bangs suddenly sniffed Ranma. "You smell like a boy and girl. Have you been with a boy today?"

That got frowns from the girls who were feeling threatened by the boys.

But Ranma was thinking, "The HeadMaster! He's been messin' up the heads of the guys! It's not _all_ their fault!"

"Don't make excuses for them!" , "Who's side are you on?!" , "She smells like a boy because she's been with boys!" , "She _likes_ boys!" , "Do you remember the rumors about her?"

"She's not like that," Hiroshi told them, seeing an angle.

"We wish she was," Daisuke said glumly, not seeing it yet.

"She smells like boys because she's with us," and Hiroshi, and then Daisuke, stood on either side of, each hugging some part of her exposed, bare waist.

"Hands off!" Ranma ordered, elbowing both away at the same time.

"We have to trust Ranma!" Shikako told the doubters. "Who else has been helping us?!"

"I think she smells good," Makoto said. That was enough for the rest of them.

"Okay, we have to destroy to PA's and whatever's messin' with the guys' noses too. Get rocks, balls and - Hey! What do you girls think you're doin'!?"

What they were doing was trying to climb the wall that surrounded the school. Maybe, if one girl gave another a boost with her hands, then the one on top of the wall could then-

Ranma leaped on top of the wall and told them, all of them, "You can't escape! Unless you stop them _here_ , they'll follow you out of school! The _real_ enemy is the loon who runs this place! He's worst than my Old Man - He's worse than Kuno, jr!"

Man! First strategy, now this! Ranma was either changing or getting completely out of character! Well, a crisis can bring out qualities you didn't know you had.

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Just seeing a large group of girls with rocks, balls, sticks, and just about anything(-goes) else they could carry as a weapon moving along in a very rough formation encouraged other isolated girls from joining. Some of the girls saw boys not wearing sports uniforms they knew and wanted them to join them. This caused arguments in the ranks about letting the "enemy" stay with them, but Ranma, and Makoto and Shikako, won the word fight and they stayed. More girls saw other boys they trusted. And those boys had guy friends. Ranma's platoon was becoming a company of foot soldiers, their uniforms the Furinkan standard, girl and boy's.

"Don't worry about destroying anything that needs destroying!" , "Half the Furinkan budget goes to repairs!" , "Let Shiva pay for it!"

It wasn't random destruction for the sake of destruction, it was aimed mainly at the PA speakers, but also the outdoor machinery of the ventilation system that blew the manmade _odor of woman_ throughout the school, and the small earthen ovens that they discovered tucked into out of the way places around the campus. They also trashed the kendo and any other club building that was separated from the main buildings. They took particular delight in smashing trophies awarded in any sports-as-martial-arts competitions.

To those on the outside, it looked like a rampage of militant, PMS women! The outsiders left them alone. For a while. But there could be only so much intimidation without the random destruction. The concentration of girl smells and pheromones - as well as their soprano and alto voices - kept drawing the attention and temptation of boys the girls would not, could not and should not trust.

[][][]

Many of them were in a line, waiting their turn.

"Sorry!" Nabiki grinned. "You should have bet on that ten minutes ago! The odds that the boys will win are now 5/3!" She checked her book, but it was more for show as she had the calculations in her head. "But I can give you 3/4 on Megumi being defeated! 4/1 on Miss Tanizaki's class surrendering before noon! And Mt. Kimura's...oh, wait, his class already defeated him." She frowned at something she noticed in the book. "Hey! Anybody willing to bet on Gosunkugi winning - _Anything_?! I'll give 44/1!"

Yes, this _was_ going to be a Big Jackpot! Most people still thought the boys would win - even girls were betting on them! Nabiki was confident that Ranma and Akane would swing the tide and bring the gold to the girl's side of her ledger. She even thought the lesser lights of the female martial artists might pull their parts of the battle off. But it really didn't matter if the boys _did_ when! She took enough strategic bets to help Vulcan Enterprises to at least show a modest profit at the end of the day. There was only one way, as she saw it, she could lose. And that wasn't going to happen, she had assured her fellow free enterprisers. It would take a miracle! ...Or magic, she might have said but was sure their belief in magic would get in their way of _seeing_ the magic. It was difficult to piece out the strange logic of magic, that's what kept her from accepting it. Her interest was in seeing _if_ it was working! If it wasn't, no great loss. She didn't make her plans on it. She could live without it but was ready to take whatever opportunity magic stupidly provided her with. Magic wasn't there to make her life better -

"Nabiki!"

...it was to make Ranma's life worse. There would be no miracle.

The little redhead in - she was too busy to bring out a camera! - a gym uniform that showed quite a lot of her perfect, female skin, landed before her. "What'dyou think you're doin'(!)?!" she demanded to know.

"What do you think you're doing?" Nabiki said, looking at the school rooftop Ranma had jumped down from.

"I'm scoutin'! I look for trouble before it can get to the girls! _Then_ see it don't!"

"And I'm taking bets. I look for trouble and make money on whether or not it does reach the girls."

"You're not on the girls' side!? _You're a girl!_ Wait 'til a guy attacks you!"

"Oh, guys have attacked me." Then she grinned. "But I win!" And take their wallets as punishment.

"You, you, win?"

"I win using the same strategy as I hear you've been doing, Miss Jiggly-Boobs, Miss Wiggly-Butt with her infamous Naturally Redheaded Hooha."

Ranma turned beet red. It was only then she began to realize just how low she had stooped to winning. Did it _have to_ be anything-goes?! What she had done would never be taught by the _Anything-Goes_ schools! There _had to_ have been ways that would not have devastated her guy brain's sense of manliness.

"You lie!"

"I never lie, Saotome," she said, giving her the cold glare. But she smiled, "I just may not tell the whole truth." And to this truth, another could be added she would not tell: Trust others not to listen carefully enough.

"Yeah(!)?! Then do it! Jiggle, wiggle, and, no you don't have to take off your…. -Just go ahead and show me how a born-girl does it!" She was cursed to be a girl sometimes, but there may be ways to protect something of her manliness. Like her wearing bloomers now and not going without panties. Maybe it wouldn't be less bad on her manliness _if_ she knew how to do all that stuff the way experts at being a girl did it.

"You should get back to scouting, Ranma. I need to get back to making money."

"No! This is important! Show me once and I copy it _now!_ I can use it in this war! I don't _want_ to do all those embarrassing things again!"

Nabiki lifted an eyebrow. "You'll pose for my camera? They'll be embarrassing to your manliness."

Ranma screamed in utter frustrated helplessness! Wasn't there _any way_ to reclaim some dignity(!)?! "Private! Nobody else! Same deal with the maid pictures!"

"Done!" And she clipped her pencil and pen to her account book and gave them to the little redhead to hold. "You, Hitoshi, defeat me and we're even on all the gambling debts you owe me!"

The tall boy in a basketball uniform immediate rushed from his place in line!

A bag's worth of coins fell to the ground and rolled. Hitoshi, seeing a 500-yet coin, chased after it and the others. He didn't watch where he was going and banged his head into the side of the cinderblock building. The coins disappeared.

"I want that deal, too, Nabiki!" a sumo wrestler cried, rushing at her.

She met him with a fan of yen bills in one hand, of dollar bills in the other. The sumo didn't know which ones to look at as Nabiki moved them about before him. "If I squash you, I get them _all!_ "

"Squash me, and the bills will go flying for the others to get!"

That made him change his mind. But he was too heavy to stop completely. Nabiki stepped aside and let him fall on Hitoshi.

"Would anybody else like to get in the bullring with me?" There was nobody else.

And The bills disappeared like the coins had.

"You tricked them! You tricked _me:_ That wasn't nothin' like what I been doin' as a girl!" Ranma complained.

"I said I use the same _strategy_ as you use. I didn't say I use the same tactics." And she chuckled, "And I rarely have to invest real cash!"

Ranma knew she had wasted enough time with Nabiki. She _would_ confront her back at the Tendos'! How _did_ she pull off that trick?! She said herself she wasn't a martial artist! But, then, Nabiki had also said, she didn't tell _all_ of the truth! Or was it didn't she hear something that Nabiki had plainly said?

[][][]

Back up on the roof of the main school building, looked to see what had happened since she was last up here.

Akane's platoon of girls coming out of the building was only now meeting up with the ones she had left under the command of Makoto and Shikako (not they could _actually_ be leaders, but they were the two girls who most trusted Ranma). The two girls were friends of Akane and were more than happy to follow her. Things were about to get worse of the boys.

Even though civvies, just the girls she had left under the command of Makoto and Shikako had left a trail of bodies. They had the advantage of numbers against sports-as-martial-artists so wedded to the game sense of their sports and the techniques of their martial arts they remained either individual combatants or joined in groups no bigger than the team members their sport required of them. A trail of male bodies in sports uniforms remained in their wake. And to add insult to their injuries, the girls had requisitioned their bats, lacrosse sticks, rackets, hockey sticks, croquet mallets, nets and wickets for their own use. They left the mitts behind.

Meanwhile, the boys were trying to group around a leader. Ranma had thought Kuno would've been their natural choice. But after a second of thought realized that the first was a stupid thought! Kuno was a lone-wolf bully with the martial arts skills - and the healing ability - and the money - and the constant yapping, irritating voice - to intimidate or wear down others. Those who had voluntarily followed him, he had just defeated, his kendo club. And now that everybody but Kuno himself knew that his dad was the even _more_ insane - etc - Headmaster of Furinkan, _nobody_ wanted him! It looked like the divided boys were going to be conquered by the girls.

Okay, there was one guy who could unite them."Dhe bachche must be listening to dheir beloved Maharaja!" said the adult-in-age-only dressed in an ornate but shoddily made costume through a cardboard megaphone from on top of a gaudily painted paper mache elephant that the little ninja guy was pulling as if it were a giant children's toy on wheels. "Dhe War of dhe Sexes is not being over! Oh, no, not by dhe longest of shots! Dhey must be showing dhe ladakee which be being dhe better half! Be acting like dhe aadamee! Dhen dhe ladakee be acting like dhe mahila! Dhen dhe birth-rate crisis of dhis Land of dhe Sunrise will be solving by dhere being more bachche for dhe Headmaster to educate!"

In her gym clothes, Ranma sat on the little space on the roof's rampart that the suicide chainlink fence allowed (there was room for her butt only because of its girl-size). She didn't need to attack the idiot. The boys were doing it on their own. They were tearing the paper mache elephant apart trying to get to the idiot.

When it looked like the wagon the wireframe was on couldn't hold any more, the ninja lit the rope-like fuse he had been pulling with and the rockets on the rear of the wagon sent them to all to crash into a tree yards away. The howdah on the back of the elephant the Maharaja was been in had detached and its roof had become a gyrocopter. Not that the little "house" had a soft landing. -Ranma made sure of that!

"Enough!" she said, picking up the large man by his tunic shirt before he could even get to his knees. "Why are you doin' this?! We have enough trouble without _you_ addin' to it, makin' it worse!"

"Dhe Headmaster knows what he is doing. He knows because he is dhe Headmaster! Such is Karma! Karma is making him head of Kuno clan with very much money and power! Dhe kasaan must do what dheir Maharaja say because dhat is dhe way of Karma! Better luck next life!"

"That's _Not_ how Karma's supposed to work! Karma is-OhmHHMahhnhh!" a bit gag had suddenly been put across her open mouth!

As if that weren't insulting enough, that little ninja jumped up on the standing pigtailed girl's back and held - tight - onto the reins attached to the bit gag.

But the ninja had neglected the bridle to keep the bit in her mouth - not that the martial artist would have ever given him the chance to, even distracted as she had been for the bit to be put in her mouth! She yanked the bit out and his hold on the reins sent the the ninja flying over her head.

The ninja landed on his knees and bowing. "Please, please, forgive me, Ranma-san Satome-san! I'm so ashamed of myself. But I was under orders from my master! He could not resist trying to rein in somebody called " _Wild Horse"_! It was a bit extreme, I admit. At least I made sure I did not have to be the groom to your bridle. I neglected that entirely!"

Ranma snatched him up and held him by the front of _his_ tunic shirt. Her other fist was cocked, ready to punch! "I should…." Man! She hated beating up the pathetic. And a guy who made himself pathetic only so he had to follow his master said but not what he meant (but, then, it _was_ difficult to figure out what a Kuno means). There was something about this little guy Ranma could almost...uh, not like, not respect, but...understand, that was it. His life was about duty. He (Sasuke, right?) was a guy trying to be honor even when he is put in dishonorable situations. Ranma could _definitely_ relate to that. _And_ to feeling pathetic. That's what her guy brain felt when he relived her memories as a girl. Today, after school and a hot soak, she was sure pathetic he would be something high above him.

Little did she know then the impact this incident would have on this day.

"Hey! Where _is_ your master?!"

"I cannot tell! My family has served the Kunos as ninjas for thirteen generations now! I am loyal to both clans!" But when Ranma set him down, the little guy fell through the grass-covered trapdoor of a hidden tiger trap.

"It's dark in here," Sasuke's voice echoed. "Oh, here's the twine that leads me through the maze of tunnels."

Ranma wondered if she should follow.

[][][]

"Make way for the Alpha Male Club! We have found the leader we should all follow!" On their shoulders like a hero was that guy with the yellow bandana. "If he can beat us, he can beat girls!"

"I told you, I don't fight girls."

"You don't have to fight girls, Ryoga!" , "You just have to frighten them!"

"I don't frighten girls, either. Not on purpose," from the sad tone of his voice he had memories of when he _had_ unintentionally frightened them. And probably more than just girls.

"I _knew_ you were that kind of a guy! Ryoga, ain't it?!" Ranma had landed on the shoulder of one of the weightlifters.

"You're, you're the girl that, uh…." Ryoga's face grew red and shy.

"Yeah. I'm the girl these guys tried to attack," she said, stamping a foot on top of her guy's head.

"Hey! Don't go stepping on my head!" the weightlifter reached up for her.

"I wouldn't touch her, if I were you," Ryoga warned, pulling the red-haired girl over onto the shoulder of a bodybuilder next to _his_ weightlifter.

"He should know better! I have a reputation!"

"She certainly does! She drinks at booze wagons with adult men!" , "And doesn't wear panties half the time."

"And kisses pigs?" Ryoga said, his fragile heart cracking.

"You saw that?" Ranma was not proud of herself now. "It was for a good deed."

"You kiss people for good deeds?"

"It wasn't a people!"

"Did you hear that?!" , "And here everybody's been wondering if she's bisexual." , "She's not _only_ bisexual?"

Ranma really didn't have a clue what they were thinking about her _now_.

But she wanted it to stop! It _had to_ be unfair to her! After all, these _were_ Alpha Male Club jerks!

But it was Ryoga that acted first. He bent down and grabbed the last one to speak by his chest hair and pulled him to the guy he was squatting on. "Do you have a problem with her kissing a pig? No? I didn't think so!" And he released his grip.

Ranma froze. Then relaxed when she didn't feel that Something. Ryoga hadn't done something that would put her in debt to him. Maybe he _was_ just the kind of guy she, and he, could be friends with. There was something about him that reminded her of the very few friend-like people she had known in her life. Friend-like because, like with Sasuke, she could understand them, even when they did no-holds-barred fighting during their martial arts training.

She was being lowered. Or, rather, the guy she was riding on was sinking. She was barely 100 pounds, 45 kilos, and the bodybuilder was fatiguing already. Some martial artist!

She got off him and looked up at all the tall, very brawny guys, and was reminded again just how much height and muscle she had lost. She felt like a kid again. Or would have, if she didn't have boobs, and ass, or all these other soft girl parts.

Ryoga leaped down to stand beside her. "I think you all owe this little lady an apology."

The Alpha Male Club looked at each other. None wanted to be the first to challenge again the guy who had so easily beat them. Since Taichi was their leader, it was he that had to apologize for them all. "We're sorry, Ranma."

"Ra,Ranma?" Ryoga repeated.

"Ranma Saotome of the _Anything-Goes_ School," the cute, little redhead did a little bow while holding out her hand to be shaken.

It wasn't shaken? Ranma looked up from her bow. That's the first time she saw that kind of reaction from anybody. The guy looked...what? Maybe devastated? Or was it an emotion she did not understand, yet.

Suddenly, the heartbreak was replaced with anger bordering on hate. "My first kiss! Die, Ranma, die!"

Ranma was barely able to use her outstretched hand to absorb some of the impact of the blow! Even then its force sent her back off her feet!

She landed against a weightlifter. She transferred as much of the momentum as her surprise let her into the 6 foot 3 inch, 190 cm, all-muscle guy. He fell, but she dropped to her feet upright. She was automatically in her fighting stance, ready to give better than she got.

"What'd'you do _That_ for(!)?!"

"First you steal my bread! Then you steal my humanity! Now. Now-" He was so enraged he was at a loss for words! That would require more rational thinking than he was capable of at the moment! He ran at her with murder in his eyes.

Ranma had made one mistake in sizing him up earlier. His fighting technique depended on his upper body strength, but his legs were just as powerful. She could feel it in the ground shaking beneath his treads. Any hit, even at a full run, would have the same force behind it as if he had been solidly fixed to the ground. In fact, even as a guy, she would have a difficult time knocking him off his feet, by attacks below the waist or above!

She ducked and, her feet against the ground, delivered a powerful blow to his gut. And another and another, in quick succession! By the time she had to stop her elbow was as bent back as much as it could go without breaking. He was still running! She hadn't slowed him down!

But she had stepped around his body. She spun and was ready to attack another weak spot. Or maybe the same weak spot. As this Ryoga-guy was stopping himself, he was bending over some. He had felt her strikes to his gut! Not too much, but enough to promise that if she continued hitting the same spot, she could get him to puke and be made vulnerable!

The bodybuilder in front of Ryoga helped him from stumbling into him, turned him around and pushed back towards the redheaded, pigtailed girl.

The bodybuilder behind her grabbed her arms and tried to keep them behind her back.

"Hey!" she cried, before stomping on his boot. She rode his knee as his pain made it automatically raise. Grasping it with her bare thighs, she used one of her mid-air techniques to keep it rising. A hip-bump and the jerk could no longer remain standing on one foot! Her arms were released as the jerk tried to keep his balance.

As his fall made him lower than her, Ranma backward-walked up and over him. Even as she was dropping behind his back she kicked him away.

Ryoga delivered the blow that sent him crashing to the ground. "Don't interfere!"

The bodybuilder had a bodybuilder friend. He attacked Ryoga. Ryoga fought him! A weightlifter joined in. And another!

Ranma was left there neglected, watching the gang-up on one guy. "Geez! Even knowin' I can beat them up, this hentai horde'd rather fight a guy."

She walked up to the dust cloud and started pulling and tossing the muscles-for-brains.

But when the dust had settled down, there was no Ryoga. He was gone.

[][][]

Ranma reached the bleachers and became a scout again. She did not like what she saw.

On the football-etc field, half the boys of the school were trapped, surrounded by the girls of the school. They were all unarmed and unprotected. The girls had all of their sports gear. There was fear in their eyes. Anger in the girls'. All they need was something to happen to set them off and they'd beat the crap out of the boys who had become their enemies.

Hiroshi, Daisuke, Gosunkugi and the boys not in uniforms sat in the bleachers, eating popcorn the girls from Amanda Enterprises, a subsidiary of Vulcan Enterprises, were selling.

"See, I told you not going out for a sport would be the best way to be with the girls, Daisuke."

"In this school, yes. But we still have to find a club with girls that will take us."

"And how would you like to place your bets?" Nabiki asked. "The odds still favor the boys!"

"How can you say that?" , "Yeah, the girls are going to win!"

"Not necessarily. What do you see down there?"

"We see guys from every sports club in Furinkan!" , "And some others, like ballet and billiards, too!"

"What you see are trapped animals. Do you know what happens to animals when they feel cornered? And these are not just ordinary trapped animals. These are boys who want to be champions so badly they'll put themselves through time-consuming, vigorous, painful training! They risk bodily injury every time they 'play'. And when it does happen, they will play hurt. And why? Their lust for male pride."

"That's not my kind of lust." , "It's safer not to be too proud."

"They," Nabiki pointed, getting worked up, feeling the adrenaline of the sales pitch, "don't believe in playing it safe! All it will take for them to turn into raging, hormone-driven, male creatures without a conscience full of blood AND sex lust is for one thing to set off the bomb that will destroy the girls! Shiva is ready to awake!

"Better hurry and get the bets down!" she smiled. "That one thing is about to arrive."

Hiroshi and the others hearing her looked where she was looking. Then they realized that only _half_ the boys were tapped on the field. Other boys were approaching from behind the girls. They weren't the other half, or even a third or a quarter, but they were enough. And first among them was Tatewaki Kuno.

"Akane Tendo, _I_ am the President of the Truce Enforcement Club!" Ikuko said on the platform high enough for all to see. "The name says it all: _Truce!_ This has gone far enough!"

Akane was also on the platform. "No, it hasn't!" she yelled. "These stupid, jerk boys have to be taught not to attack girls! We've been lucky! Next time, girls _will_ be hurt - Or worse! We need to hurt them back - No! Not Back: _Before_ they can hurt the weak girls! This is our one chance!"

"No, Akane. Ikuko is right. This has to end. And end now, before both girls and boys are really hurt. And from a hurt martial arts techniques can't heal." It was Ranma's voice, and yet, and yet…

"No," Nabiki said, barely able to breathe. She had dropped her account book. Her hands were digging into the shoulders of both Hiroshi and Daisuke. She was in total, nerve-wracking suspense. "The miracle can't happen. The magic won't allow it."

Akane turned to see Ranma land lightly, even, to her, gracefully down onto the platform. He was a male again. And he wasn't dressed in bloomers. He was dressed in a drama class costume. And the characters on the costume read, _Romeo_.

 _Romeo_ swept his _Juliet_ up in his arms. "The Lysistrata rule is over." They kissed.


	10. Chapter 12 The Miracle and After

An unusual disclaimer: Ranma ½ is a trademark of Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ Communications, and its characters have been borrowed without permission. And Son Turned Daughter was originally written way back in 2002 by the FanFiction author Tangent, and his characters Megumi, Yasushi and Ayane have, likewise, been borrowed without permission. Please see the first two chapters of this story under his pen name. This story is written for non-commercial purposes only.

[][][] [][][] [][][]

Six-year-old Kodachi had made six-year-old Akane kiss her. Shampoo had kissed Ranma on the cheek. Ranma had blown Hiroshi a kiss. Ranma had kissed the Burin-kun on the lips, but the pig hadn't returned the kiss. For Ranma and Akane, this was their First - _real_ , mutual - Kiss. _This_ was the Kiss, the kiss that counted.

And they had done it on a platform in front of the whole school. A school at war, boys rebelling against the Lysistrata Rule: _No girl dates a boy who gets into fights_. The Truce Enforcement Club had seen that the girls hadn't. They had organized the girls to see they were protected from boys who wouldn't take no for an answer. This was how the Hentai Horde was born, battling each other and the few girls not under the club's protection. Akane Tendo was their prime, number one target, the prize date of prize dates. Until the pigtailed redhead had arrived.

And here Akane was, the girl that had become the obsession of all these boys, kissing and being kissed by the boy all the rest wished they were at that moment!

And all the girls, now _months_ without dates themselves, yearned to be in the arms and feel the lips of the boy their battle-fevered minds _knew_ had to be handsome and charming and everything that would make _him_ the prize date of prize dates!

The Lysistrata Rule was over. Their teenage needs could now no longer let it continue!

But how could the girls trust again the boys who had attacked them! How could the boys trust the girls that had defeated their male prides! Something had to happen for the reconciliation to begin.

And that something was before them: Their now idealized couple. _Romeo and Juliet_ , what more romantic figure was there for a girl? But for the boys? What could this total stranger do to convince them he represented them? Was he a guy who could help each sex understand the other? Who was he?

"Who are you to kiss Akane(!)?! Speak or feel my blade!" Kuno cried, leaping onto the platform.

So surprised, then so overwhelmed by the realization of her greatest, oldest fantasy, and on a stage, no less, Akane had returned the kiss before she knew she was. She didn't want reality to return. But it began to when his lips left hers.

"Who am I? Can't you read the shirt? I'm _Romeo_ ," the handsome boy said to the delight of the girls. "Romeo Saotome, of the _Anything-Goes_ School." And he looked at his _Juliet_. "Just like Akane."

"Saotome? Then you are related to Ranma Saotome(!)?"

"She's my sister!" He then made sure Akane was out of harm's way. "You've been botherin' her! Stop it, or you won't just have to answer to her but ME! _Me_ especially!" And he took Kuno's bokken away in a blink.

"My sword! How dare you desecrate the very symbol and substance of my samurai heritage!"

Romeo the peasant warrior glared at the idiot born to be high-and-mighty. He could snap the bokken in one hand. "Not your samurai whatever. Your male pride. Say it! Say I'm hurtin' your stinkin' male pride!"

Kuno stood there, stone-faced, prideful, representing his ancient lineage. And all of the boys watching who could still sharply feel their near to mortally wounded prides.

"Here!" Romeo thrust it back into his hands. "Too freakin' much of everybody's stinkin' pride has been damaged today! _Mine especially!_ And martial arts techniques ain't gonna heal that."

No sooner does he grasp that his sword in his hands, but Kuno attacked. "You must be taught to never touch a man's sword!"

"Akane! Ikuko! The rest of you girls! Get back! -Kuno, I won't let you hurt no girls!"

Kuno was kicked from the platform...he landed in the middle of boys trapped within a wall of girls with weapons, weapons that had once belonged to the boys themselves.

First one girl, then others, gave the sports gear back to the boys.

Some boys found themselves saying, Sorry. Some did not. But they found other ways. The resentments were melting. Lessons were being learned by both sides on the school grounds.

The war could soon be over. And if it were, there would only be one loser. Vulcan Enterprises would not only be made to give back the betting money it collected, it would have to make good on bets that didn't depend on which side won in this _Battle of the Sexes_. The worst for Nabiki's company would come from the compulsive gamblers who couldn't pass up the 44-to-1 odds she had given on Gosunkugi winning at Anything. The bully-bait had won by surviving the day unharmed.

[][][]

But the storm had not passed. The Headmaster dropped onto the stage on a pogostick!(?)!

He was no longer dressed like an Indian Maharaja, now it was an American Cowboy, complete with boots, jeans, chaps, fringed shirt, vest and, in his outstretched hand, a Stetson. "YeeHaw! This bronc is bucking something fierce today!" It was almost a minute before he could get off the pogostick. He would've fallen if he didn't then use it as a staff.

"You're spoiling a mood, here!" Akane screamed attacking the total, great, insane idiot!

Or would have, if Ranma hadn't lifted her up in his arms by her thighs and back. It was a mighty struggle of balances as he adjusted and readjusted for every violent kick and thrash Akane did to break free and bash Kuno's dad!

"Hey, 'Romeo', I _still_ have my hands free! Do you want me to hit _you_ , too(!)?!"

"Do it, then. But we need to hear this, I think."

"You dogies sure should hear what your Wrangler has to say! As the Headmaster, yesterday, I lassoed the Truce Enforcement Club! I am corralling you all into detention for mavericking in unauthorized activities!"

Ikuko in her geisha haircut stood up to the man who had given it to her. "This school activity isn't being conducted by the Truce Enforcement Club! That club has been disbanded. There is no further need for it. The Lysistrata Rule is over!"

Kuno, Sr. looked at her in wonder. Had he actually won at something? No, he wouldn't believe it! "Tell me, then, filly, who is taking the brand for this here shindig?"

"The Date Management Club!"

" _Date Management?!"_ the said the crowd that made it a roar.

"The Headmaster now disbands the Date Management Club!"

"Without dates, there are going to be no "dogies" for the Headmaster to wrangle," Ikuko said.

[][][]

It took several minutes to get some sense into the oldest Kuno's head. Maybe they had said something he had misunderstood and, so, made sense to him. In the end, at last, he agreed that the club could continue.

Happy to be defeated, the Headmaster Wrangler pogoed off into...well, it was still noon. But no longer High Noon. The Showdown was over. The school had won.

[][][]

Ikuko Kuonji spoke to all the students gathered on the main sports field. "The Date Management Club chaperones without chaperoning! We will ensure that every girl is treated right! In return for the cooperation of the boys, we will help in any way we can to see that their dates go smoothly. Counselling will be available, including how _your_ date wants to be treated. Questionnaires will be made available. Sometime. Soon.

"But first! We have the very first, inaugural dates the club will manage! It is time for the raffle to see who will date Akane Tendo and Ranma Saotome!"

Her arm outstretched she turned in a flourish. Her wide Emcee's grin fell when she saw Romeo holding both hands of his _Juliet_. "I'm sorry," she quietly said.

Romeo stepped away, his hands clinging to hers as long as he could. "You gave your word of honor. _I_ gave my word of honor. It's only one date." And then he leaped and was gone.

The romantics in the audience were greatly touched. Some were overwhelmed by sentiment. But, then, they didn't know the real Saotome.

[][][]

The red-haired Ranma hurried out of the girls locker room in her school dress. The only way anybody would know she was wearing bloomers was when she had to leap or kick, she would no longer go without panties again! Well, not unless there was a freaking good tactical reason! "I hope I can get those _Romeo_ clothes out of my locker before somebody finds them."

[][][]

"AAAA! NO! This is my nightmare!" Akane screamed at the top of her lungs.

Ranma screeched to a halt inches away from leaping onto the platform, her hands in warding signs. It didn't sound like her friend liked who had won a date with her.

"I'm sorry, Akane. But the winner won fair and square. We _cannot_ change the rules on the very first date under the Date Management Club. As I said - Listen, everybody in school! - we'll do our best to see that the date goes smoothly! And remember, Akane did not choose this date! Or Ranma. (Oh, please, let at least her winner be a winner.)

'Now, has anybody seen Ranma Saotome? Is she with her brother, Romeo?"

"I, I'm here!" Ranma announced, landing on shaking legs."Bring it on! I'm ready for the worst!" It had to be Kuno! She still owed him a debt. The Something wouldn't leave her alone until she gave him a kiss. Or maybe she had to give him more, as interest for not paying off the debt when she first had the chance to.

As the drum spun, she suddenly realized it _wasn't_ going to be Kuno! The rules said, Only those who _hadn't_ fought Akane could enter! She was saved!

"And the winning ticket is…?" Ikuko turned to Akiko who shared the ticket stub with Umeko and Emiko as well. Finally, they had to tell the waiting audience, "We're having trouble reading this handwriting. It may be, uh, "Good Fang"?"

"We did it! All the other clubs are losers! The Alpha Male Club gets a date with Ranma!"

"No, you don't! You fought Akane! You don't qualify!" the redhead screamed. Akane was right! This WAS turning into a nightmare!

"But the guy we bought the ticket for hasn't! You _have_ to give your date to Ryoga!"

"RYOGA!? The guy who tried to~" Suddenly eerie, icy creeps ran up and down her soft, jiggly body. The Something was back - with a vengeance! This _had to be_ her punishment for _not_ kissing Kuno!

The Date Management Club members who were not Akane and Ranma looked at each other, quickly conferencing with their eyes and gestures. Ikuko finally gave in. "Okay. Where is Ryoga?! Is he here somewhere?! Alpha Males, do you know where he is?"

"No," Taichi said. "He disappeared after he defeated us."

" _I_ defeated you!" Ranma yelled. But nobody was really paying attention to that, then.

"We can't wait! These two dates are the two most important ones this club will probably ever have! Somebody must win and go on a date _Today!_ We're spinning the drum and draw out another raffle ticket!"

[][][]

After the drawings, Sayuri and Yuka and Makoto and Shikako came up to the prizes to give their condolences. "We're so sorry for you!" , "It had to be fixed!" , "Yeah, there's no way the two most worst dates…" , "Other than Kuno!" , "...could have been chosen!" , "Don't do it!" , "Yeah! What's your honor compared to the loss of your self-respect!" , "Everybody will understand when you say, No!" , …

But finally, the time came when Akane and Ranma had to step out of their circle of friends and face their harsh reality.

[][][]

"Uh, hi, Ranma. I guess I'm the lucky guy. The luckiest guy!" Hiroshi said. "Remember the magic star in our classroom this morning said I was okay."

" _You_ remember I'm a martial artist - _The best!_ "

"No! No, I'd never forget that! The magic star said I don't fight girls!" And then he made one of his stupid jokes, "I don't _want_ to fight girls. I can't fight that I like girls."

Stupid, no-good Something. Just for blowing him a kiss? It wasn't fair.

And Akane's date? "I don't like it, either, Akane."

"Then _why_ did you buy a _raffle ticket(!)?!_!"

"To show I was supporting the other girls! The boys had stopped buying them! We had to make sure there would be a raffle even _if_ the boys didn't like it! _Especially_ if the boys didn't like it!"

"You don't want to go on a date with me! Don't! You don't haven't give your word of honor!"

"I'm not going on the date to be with _you!I_ Get real! I'm going on this date to be with Kuno!" Megumi said.

"KUNO(!)?!" cried both prizes, Akane and Ranma.

"He ain't comin'! He can't! He's fought Akane!"

"And I've _always_ beaten him up!"

"He is! Remember the PE basketball game he interrupted(!)?! He told everybody you, Ranma, said you'd go on a date with him if he went to Akane's house and asked your pop for a date! He said he did, and you _do_ owe him a date!"

Ranma screamed, clutching her head as the eerie, icy creeps swept up and down her body again. The only "comfort", if she could call it "comfort", was that they were less intense than those telling her she had a great, big, huge debt owed to this Ryoga guy she didn't know!

"Ranma's not going on a date with Kuno! Or with any…." Akane had to stop herself when she remembered Hiroshi was there with them. "He really doesn't count as a guy."

"Ow, that hurts, Akane."

"I have to, Akane. I don't want it! I hate it! But I have to, Akane."

"Ranma?" Akane was confused and felt so sorry for her friend. "You'll explain it to me later?"

The pigtailed girl hung her head and nodded. "There's another truth about me you should know."

"Whatever," Megumi rolled her eyes. "This is MY chance to be on a date with Kuno! It _only_ happens if Ranma dates Kuno _Today!_ "

[][][]

"Is your brother, that knave, and sneak-attacker, Romeo Saotome, coming, Ranma?" Kuno met them outside the school gate, his bokken ready to meet the varlet.

"No!" Megumi was the first to speak to him. (Not that the others _wanted_ to speak to Kuno.) "When me and my girls were at Akane's house, Ranma told us her pop keeps them separated from each other!"

Akane and Ranma looked at each other, silently knowing what the other was thinking. Ranma had been trying to tell the truth about her curse without having to explain how the curse worked. This was the result. She now had a "brother" that wasn't allowed to be seen with her. Actually, that might work out okay, after all. It could be their excuse for why Ranma and Romeo were never seen with each other.

Wait a minute! Wasn't there something else to the story that got added? The gossip Ayane came up with the idea Ranma and Akane _both_ had a love interest in a guy they wouldn't name but was now named Romeo! Akane and Ranma and Romeo were in a friendly, even bisexual, love triangle!

"I called me - _He, Romeo_ , called me his Sister!" (And in her mind she again heard the Alpha Male Club asking, "She's not _only_ bisexual?")

"He isn't?"

"No, he isn't!" Akane rushed to save Ranma from adding _yet more_ dirt to her reputation. "They're, uh, half - No, that would still be…. That's right! They _steps!_ They're _not_ related! Only by marriage - Not _their_ marriage! By their parents' marriage! Ranma's dad doesn't like Romeo because, uh: He doesn't like the man his wife was married to _before_ him!" _Whew!_ That sounded like something Nabiki could make up!

"My mom was married before?" Ranma was a little slow on the uptake. She wondered what her mom - if she was still alive - would think of that.

Kuno smiled and placed his wooden sword debonairly on his shoulder. "Then I am head and shoulders above your step-sibling, Ranma. For _I_ have the approval of this Pop creature of yours, as Romeo does not. He has no standing in this match."

[][][]

"Though it be uncharacteristic of a Kuno, I am left with no choice. For the sake of the finest and most memorable of dates that will leave you most worthy and fairest of Ladies-in-waiting pining for yet more of the same from your heartthrob, the Blue Thunder, I call, _Sasuke!_ " and he snapped his fingers.

A white stretch limo with gold trim slowly approached them. But as the rich boy reached out for the door to let his date and her companions enter, it kept going on.

"Sasuke! Return! You have overshot your mark!"

The limo was, even more slowly, backed up and came within a foot of Kuno's waiting hand.

"Sorry!" the little ninja said, bowing out of the open driver's window he was barely able to see through. "I _do_ have my driver's license, but I'm more of what you would call a _paper driver_. I don't have much experience in _actually_ driving."

"We're risking our lives with him?" Hiroshi was not pleased.

"We're martial artists. We risk our lives all the time," Ranma said. Akane reluctantly agreed with Ranma. And Megumi insisted on showing how brave she could be. She was the first one to go into the limo.

[][][]

Of course, Megumi ended up sitting next to Akane who had to be next to Hiroshi who was by Ranma and you can guess who sat on the other side of the redhead. At least there was enough room on the long bench-like seat that no one's legs were _forced_ to be touching. Not unless Sasuke took some turns too sharply and inertia did the rest. Kuno was playing gracious, gentlemanly host and not a molester trying to take advantage of the women. So far.

The farthest the better, as far as Ranma was concerned. It would take another miracle for her not to have to pay the debt the Something said she owed Kuno.

"Uh, um, which restaurant are we going to?" Ranma hoped to at least get a good meal out of all this. Yeah, like the condemned man gets the best when it's his one last meal.

"What movie are we going to see?!" Akane asked, hoping it was long and would take up most of the date. Kuno would, for once, have to keep his mouth shut while they were at the theater.

"Let's see the big game! You can afford the scalpers, Kuno!" Hiroshi suggested.

"Le, let's, um, do, uh, karaoke," Megumi said forcefully, but it came out as a weak suggestion. She was again the tough girl with the tied tongue.

"I have the itinerary all mapped out like a campaign," Kuno said as suavely as he could. "And as the general, I know that to best impress the ladies it is best they be surprised. Pleasantly, of course.

"Now," he said, opening the wet bar before them. "What would my guests like? Tea? Chai? Espresso? I have a fine selection of vintage fruit juices."

"Don't you have anything stronger?" Hiroshi asked.

"We are under age! We will not be indulging in alcohol on this date. Or any date, I should hope, until after we are 20 years of age!"

The way Hiroshi looked at Ranma, she knew he was thinking about the rumor of her being a boozer. Especially if men were paying for it.

[][][]

Kuno insisted on playing host by regaling those daters he was treating with tales of his noble and heroic exploits. Of course, they knew most of them already, having seen samurai epics and a sci-fi movie here and there. They did _not_ know Kuno had once had animal companions like Momotaro - in fact, he had had _the same_ mascots! Only Ranma and Akane knew that the reason he was relating this was because he had met Ranma's Pop in panda form. Thinking on all the folktales where the protagonist had intelligent animals to assist them, he "naturally" assumed Ranma was a modern-day reincarnation of one of those legendary figures. Which, of course, made him want Ranma as his own even more! Wife or concubine, it did not matter.

It was just before certain parts of Kuno's narratives that Sasuke's lack of driving skills was most evident. As if, perhaps, planned? "And there I was, facing the most fearsome of European dragons. Not the kind and benevolent dragons of the East, but those of the degenerate West! It was a dragon that would put St. George himself to the test! So intimidated was the damsel, she threw herself-"

A sharp turn and a bump and Ranma found herself - for the third time since she met him- on Kuno. This time on his lap.

"A curse, my damsel?" Kuno smiled.

"A what?" Hiroshi asked, jealous.

"It is a private gesture of love between these two secret amoureux."

"It's no secret that I don't _want_ you!" Ranma jumped off Kuno's lap and used the limo door to propel herself to the other side of Megumi, furthest away from the samurai idiot. Or that was her plan.

The limo took another turn and the door was moving away before she could push herself off it properly. Her boobs fell between Hiroshi's thighs.

"This is a curse?" he smiled. "I'll take it! So, Ranma, is this our private gesture of love, too?"

"Move these legs together and you'll regret it, man!"

This and a couple of other incidents convinced Ranma she was fated to sit between two of the guys she most disliked.

[][][]

It wasn't long before they had left the narrow streets of Nerima and were out into the greater part of Greater Tokyo. The traveling was faster. It wouldn't be soon before they were out of the limo and no longer trapped with Kuno. They hoped.

It wasn't long, miles, kilometers, before they had left the place best known in Japan for its daikon radishes and arrived at the place best known for the shops that catered to teens, Shibuya, It was more crowded than Ranma, or the others, were used to in the bedroom community of Nerima. Ranma did not like it. But there was one good thing about it. And she decided to take the opportunity.

Kuno, being an idiot, had not locked his limo door. Ranma opened it and leaped over Kuno's lap and to the outside. The car was still moving, but so slowly even Hiroshi might have been able to do it.

But he didn't have to. Kuno ordered Sasuke to stop and let everybody else out.

"Man, it's noisy! There's too many people talkin', screamin' and yellin' - What screamin' and yellin'!?"

There was a man running with a woman's purse. Great! the schoolgirl redhead thought, a chance to stretch her legs after being cramped up in the limo.

But some teen girl with red-orange hair was getting to him first. "Stop in the name of my acrylic nails! Super GAL Ran Kotobuki will stop you!" And she did, hitting him with a heavy handbag that was, for all Ranma knew, filled with rocks. Beyond this, all the true redhead could think of was how she was dressed. Too t _rendy_. Not that she understood the concept of "trendy", but she knew from her travels what girls and women usually wore. If she was to dress like a girl, she wanted clothes that didn't make her stand out from the born-girls. For her, it was _fit in to be in_ with the girls. As it was pointed out, Ranma did not understand the concept of "trendy".

"We should indeed go to a place more serene," Kuno said. "Surely there are small, intimate shops even in this beating heart of the mega-stores that have some soundproofing! Sasuke!"

"Yes, Master?!" CRASH!

[][][]

There were people, mostly women, but not a crowd in the small shop they discovered off the main boulevard of Shibuya. And it did attempt to present an otherworldly quality by its soundproofing, isolating it from the din outside. Included in its ambiance were small tables that allowed only the seating of two - or three, with a little more difficulty if Kuno insisted on sitting with the daters. Waitresses in maid's uniforms joined the saleswomen wearing samples of what the shop had to sell joined the in serving the shop's customers, offering a café-style menu. Which _more than_ pleased all of the daters and Kuno, as they hadn't had lunch!

The daters also discovered two others willing to serve them. "Ikuko? Akiko? What are _you_ doing here?!" Akane said rushing to them when she saw them.

"We're the Date Management Club, now, remember? We're here to see that your dates go as smoothly as we can help it to! This is our first test! We _have to_ have your dates work out as an example to all our future daters!" Ikuko said.

"We were riding up front with Sasuke," Akiko smiled, though there were signs of relief that they were no longer had to see up-close what kind of a driver the little ninja was.

"That's right!" Akane said. "There was no window to see the driver's compartment."

"The first thing the successful dating girl needs is the right kind of clothes. You should be wearing _real_ -" , " - _Special!_ \- " , "clothes!" , "Not your school uniforms!" , "And let's face it, the Furinkan uniform ranks near the bottom in style and class!" , "At least it's not an old-fashioned fuku middy uniform!" , "Like the kind that went out of style with _Urusei Yatsura_!"

The two girls looked at each other as they realized something and then had to giggle.

"What's so funny? Why do you even remember that show?" Akane was leary of the answer.

"Was the show funny?" Ranma asked. "I wouldn't know. I hardly ever got to see any TV."

They tried to explain - but burst into laughter when they tried. Finally, they took Ranma's arm and escorted her, and the others who followed. "Come on, Ryuunosuke, let's get you into real girls clothes!" , "Yeah. I remember you saying you were raised as a boy." , "You don't have a dress or even slacks and blouses, do you?" Ranma could only shake her head, no, she didn't.

"How is the club going to pay for these clothes?" Akane asked. "You _could not_ have gotten that much money from the raffle!"

"The backer of a play or an extravaganza of a production is called an "angel". I, Tatewaki Kuno, am your angel, your guardian angel, on this date! And I insist you ladies are most properly attired for your dates."

No! No! No! Ranma screamed inside. She was becoming more and more indebted to Kuno, of all freaking people! She was doomed! The miracle to save her was becoming less and less likely. At this rate, she would become his concubine by the end of the day. At night. Before bedtime. Then the nightmare would absolutely come true!

"Look! Girls dressing rooms!" Hiroshi smiled rushing to grab a good table across from them. "The first thing a girl has to wear is her bra and panties, right?"

"Get lost!" Megumi growled at him. She was as tall as him and was definitely stronger.

"Shouldn't you be getting into a suit? You're wearing just your Furinkan pants and dress shirt." Akane said the same thing as Megumi, but in a more polite manner.

"I shall have my manservant Sasuke -"

"Yes, Master?" The little ninja appeared almost from nowhere. Everybody had seen him dropping down from the ceiling. Well, it was more like falling.

"Be away to the nearest tuxedo emporium and purchase a pair, one for me and one…" Kuno managed to look down his high-born nose at Hiroshi while being magnanimous, "him."

"Yes, Master! I already know your sizes. I shall find a tape measure and find his and then be off to do my master's bidding!"

"Hey! I don't want you two here! I don't want _any_ guy seeing me try on lingerie!" Akane threatened to do more than just threaten. She was upset to have even _said_ "lingerie" in front of boys.

"Then, Don't!" Megumi told her. "Me, I'm going to do it!" This was a chance for her to let Kuno see her body! If her tongue couldn't speak to him, her body _had to!_ She had practice at speaking boy-girl body language!

"Be a cheap bimbo!"

"Cheap? Look at the prices of these clothes! This is one of the highest of high-end fashion shops! It doesn't even have to cater to teens in the middle of Shibuya!"

"Whatever! Ranma, come! Let's leave!" But her redheaded friend did not make any move to follow. "Ranma?"

Ranma was quaking, shivering in absolute terror. She could _not_ move. "I, I…." Suddenly she grabbed her best and maybe, she thought, her only real friend and pulled her into the nearest dressing room.

"What is it, Ranma?(!) Are you sick?(!)"

"I'm sick alright. I'm ready to puke my guts out!" Ranma managed to say in a low voice, hoping to keep their conversation as private as she could. "I'd run, leap onto these skyscrapers around her and rooftop jump from one to the next if I could! But I can't! Please - please! - Akane, please, understand! I can't understand it, but I have to do this. At least I got Megumi here, too. It won't just be me. I can handle it, survive, I think, if I ain't alone doing this, this, unmanly thing."

Akane could only stand there for a long moment. "Your male pride is really suffering, isn't it, Ranma? No…" and she put her hand on hers, "Romeo. I'm here for you."

[][][]

Having Akane with her, and having no choice, anyway, allowed Ranma's competitive nature to come out. She welcomed it as a short-term release and cover-up of her true feelings. So, it was _her_ against Megumi! She knew how to copy moves, even the sexy poses of her rival, and improvise and improve on them! That came from her martial arts training. So, once she began to imitate Megumi and try to outdo her, she had to turn it into a martial arts competition. Besides, she was a natural show-off.

But she had to win the Martial Arts Lingerie Match on points, as Akane, Ikuko and Akiko made sure Ranma didn't wear the same kind Megumi was. Akane was given warm colors, yellows, and oranges. She was attracted to a red bra that reminded her of her _Juliet_ costume. Ranma was given cool colors, mostly greens, and blue-greens. She was attracted to peach colored girl's underwear that matched her skin complexion and might make those she fought against think she was naked.

Megumi insisted on getting the sexiest, most "secret" of "Victoria's Secret" lingerie the shop had to offer. They were black or jewel tone with black lace or patterns. Disappointingly for her, none revealed her nipples or groin.

And it was a good thing for Hiroshi none did. As it was, he was rapidly going through a whole fancy dispenser of napkins trying to staunch his nosebleeds. No sooner had he thought he had one under control, another nosebleed arrived with a new set of sexy lingerie.

Kuno was made of sterner stuff. He sat there, silently, unmoving, rigid, looking almost as if rigor mortis had set in. He was _that_ determined to prove to Ranma and Akane he could be the most gentlemanly of gentlemen, worthy of being their husband to his wife, and master to his concubine. With the strain it was putting on his nervous system and heart, Ranma's miracle seemed possible. Before he collected on the debt Ranma's Something required her to pay, he could have been very well dead of a stroke, heart attack or both.

In other words, Ranma's effort was basically wasted. The two males did not appreciate the poise, style, and verve that added up to the panache that was the petite yet curvaceous redhead.

Well, it was wasted on the boys. Both waitresses and saleswomen halted in their jobs to observe. This encouraged Ranma even more. This was _better_ than winning her battle with Megumi to get the guy's attention. She was winning in the way that _really_ mattered: The girls', the women's appreciation! Once again she was reminded of her first day at Furinkan as a girl - less than a week ago - had it only been three days?! The girls in classroom 1-F had looked at her with all sorts of negative emotions - envy, fear, anger, disgust, and more - but underneath they could appreciate her body as much as the guys' could. Only, she thought, hopefully, it wasn't with any hopes of getting any sex out of her. And knowing _that_ allowed, ironically, Ranma to be her sexiest! Her male pride was forgotten. Her girl brain was full alive and in charge! She Was _Woman!_

The cute, little redhead applied and adapted the moves she had witnessed just this morning during her run through the halls of Furinkan, when she was on the lookout for girls to rescue she was also taking in the tactical moves and poses the girls did as girls, moves and poses she _knew_ , from the depths of her male pride, no guy could, would or should do!

She wiggled her ass, noticed the frowns on the women, and toned it down. She made a running motion and saw what having one knee bent out did for her audience. Fraction of an inch by a millimeter, she adjusted how much she should push out one hip until she _knew_ this was the definition of sexy because of the look in the women's eyes She brought up a hand behind her head to scratch it as she wondered what to do next. That, too, turned out to be a sexy thing to do. She just had to learn how to hold herself so her boobs didn't become too flattened by the action. And so it went. Her ingrained desire for new techniques would not allow her to stop until she had perfected them all...or until her audience had to go back to doing their jobs of serving other customers.

And Akane? She, too, managed to put on a bra and panties, and even a garter, that Ikuko and Akiko had helped the saleswomen pick out for her. She was able to leave the dressing room, reluctantly, slowly, self-consciously, then retreating before trying all over again. With great effort and devastation to her modesty, she did, at last, present herself to the outside world. _There, that wasn't so bad, right?_ After all, it wasn't like she was the _only_ girl doing it.

Then she looked at the other two confident, sexy, beautiful versus cute girls in only their underwear and lost it!

It was true! It had _always been true!_ She was an uncute tomboy! It would be better for her if _she_ were cursed at Jusenkyo! She should be a boy.


	11. Chapter 13 Yin, the Essence of Darkness?

An unusual disclaimer: Ranma ½ is a trademark of Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ Communications, and its characters have been borrowed without permission. And Son Turned Daughter was originally written way back in 2002 by the FanFiction author Tangent, and his characters Megumi, Yasushi and Ayane have, likewise, been borrowed without permission. Please see the first two chapters of this story under his pen name. This story is written for non-commercial purposes only.

[][][] [][][] [][][]

Akane folded! She hugged her knees together, hiding her lingerie behind her legs, and tried not to cry into her knees.

"Akane?" Ranma in a green camisole bra and tap panties rushed over to her.

"You're so sexy. -And I'm not!" She _was_ crying, now.

"Sexy? Me? Like I want to be!" the pigtailed girl put her arms around Akane.

But it wasn't to hug her. "But do _you_ want to be?" She lifted Akane. The long-haired girl didn't have the strength to resist.

What strength she did have was from her modesty and shame and was put towards curling herself small again. Her friend was there to see that she didn't. "Well? Do you?!"

Akane, her head bowed, looked at the redhead. In her field of vision, Megumi made sure she saw her, too. Her rival for the alpha girl among the school's tough girls was wearing a matching lingerie set of a jewel purple with black trim. The girl with the blonde streak in her hair sneered while posing in one of her most provocative manners. She was a master, or mistress, of showing off her body for the boys and she knew it.

Akane teared up again, wanting to hide her face again.

Ranma wouldn't let her. While half-supporting her, her other hand forced, gently, Akane to look. "She's challengin' you? You gonna let her win?"

Strength began to return to her.

But not enough. She could not stand straight and tall, showing the curves that made her a woman.

But she was still looking at Megumi. And Megumi knew it. And Akane's rival turned to Kuno (and Hiroshi). "You like what you see? And I know how to use it..."

"That bimbo bitch. She's shameless."

Ranma's lips were close to her friend's ear. "Stop looking at her, now. And don't look at them, the guys. Look there."

"Where? ...I don't see what you want me to see." There were women and girls looking at her as they went on their way. And this made her self-conscious. She was making a fool of herself. _Of course!_

"Look at the girls, not at the guys. That's how I'm in training."The little redhead had slipped into using the female form of Japanese.

"What?...?" Akane _had_ to look at Ranma, now. It wasn't adding up for her.

"Hiroshi and Kuno are jerks. Being sexy is wasted on them. They'd rather see girls naked, anyway. It's _them_ , the girls, that is your real audience."

"Audience?" the actress in her heard the call of the stage. It wasn't that far away.

"Sure! You have no problem being in your underwear in a girls locker room."

"But you're not supposed to be sexy there, either. It'd only cause trouble."

"Always?" And here Ranma had thought she was on to something.

"Not in locker rooms, but…" Akane's modesty faded, morphing into her memories of her and her friends getting together at their houses or other safe places and practicing at being sexy., alluring sirens. It had been girls playing the serious game of growing into being real women. There had been times when they had left when she had continued to play the part. Her sisters had critiqued and even joined in, sometimes.

Strength came back to her knees. She rose.

No. No, she couldn't. She couldn't go all the way. She wasn't ready to continue her practicing. Her training. "Kuno and," especially that pervert, "Hiroshi are here." And other male customers, too!

"You can beat them up. And have. You've beaten up the Hentai Horde. It took all the girls at school to do that this morning."

"You're right!" Akane's battle aura was lit! "What do I have to worry about! I'm a martial artist! And a martial artist is always ready to take the risk!"

Ranma had stepped away from her. She no longer needed to support her. But she also backed further away. The battle aura's glow was bright. She in just lingerie could feel it on her exposed skin. And she saw it! If she were a guy now, she may have missed it. Geez! She probably _had_ missed it when all she had been was a guy. He hadn't been the kind of guy to notice things like this in the _first place_. She, Ranma-kun, could be such a jerk.

[][][]

Megumi's hands were in fists! How? How?! How could she have been defeated(!)?! And by _Akane_ , of all girls! Ranma, she may have understood! That little redhead had something she lacked: She was _cute!_ Too fucking damned cute. A lot of guys preferred that to the outright beauty _she_ had. Akane wasn't cute! Akane wasn't beautiful! Akane had as much muscle definition as she had! How could Kuno (and that Hiroshi creep) be paying Akane more attention than to her! Look, Akane even had the women in the store looking at her! Even the store's fucking employees!

Akane wasn't even wearing anything sexy! Her lingerie was white-with-yellow _polka dots!_ Even her garter was stupid with small ruffles and a jingle bell dangling off of it.

Hiroshi stared, his mouth open, forgetting about the napkins he held over his nose. Kuno was, strange to believe, even _more_ rigid, _more_ like an unmoving zombie. His eyes, though, were wide and sweat was appearing on his brow.

Akane really wasn't paying them or Megumi much attention. Her target audience was the women she saw. How many could she get to slow down? To pause? To stop? and look at _her._ _They_ were the experts on what was sexy. Only….

There was an effeminate-looking man staring at her. It wasn't jealousy she saw, not envy...maybe, wistfulness?

Her battle aura flickered.

Then she noticed a sign near the unmanly man, _Men's Sizes_. This store also sold to crossdressers _!_

Her battle aura went out.

She looked at her _Romeo_ of this morning. It was hard to remember, or even imagine, this petite bust busty cutie with the hourglass figure as capable of even _looking_ like a female-to-male crossdresser. What if either of them, _both_ , were bisexual? What would she feel seeing Ranma the male - who had fulfilled her fantasy of fantasies - in the very lingerie Ranma the female was wearing now? This seemed to be where his curse was leading him. No! She couldn't, wouldn't see him as effeminate! Just as she wouldn't allow herself to see herself as an uncute tomboy! Not anymore! There was room in her life for only one _Romeo!_ And it had just better not be _her!_

Kuno was blinking as if coming out of a trance. "Is something amiss, my fair Artemis?"

"Wow~ You had it there for a while, Akane," said Ranma in the camisole bra and tap panties. "Just a little more practice and your sexiness can last longer! I can help you develop it, now that I got an idea of what sexy is! It's a technique! It's an emotion that directs you _ki_ energy!"

"Ranma! Ranma!" Akane grasped her hands tightly, raising them up near her own face. "Please, please! Don't ever use the technique! Don't become sexy! Not like that! Promise me!"

"Uh, ' hadn't thought I would. Except, maybe, yeah, for tactical use. But, now that I think about it. No, Akane. I won't promise. We're belon' to the _Anything-Goes_ schools. Nothin' that's not lethal or criplpin' is taken out of our arsenal of options."

"Ranma!" Akane's arms went around the smaller girl and grasped her to her. Akane cried, trying to hold onto her Romeo for as long as she could, and crying over a loss that, dear, please spirits and kami, may not happen.

Only her love interest was cursed. And after this morning's miracle, could there be another?

[][][]

Ranma, with some non-physical contact help of Kuno, got Akane to sit on a chair beside one of the small tables in the shop. She, then, sat across from her. Both were still in the shop's lingerie. As was Megumi, sitting at the table Kuno was sitting at. But he was - _still!_ \- paying attention to the girl in the stupid yellow polka dots at the next table by his side. (And Hiroshi had a seat where he could see dressing rooms besides. A beautiful girl with a with a high ponytail had gone into one. With any luck...)

"Are you going to be okay, Akane?" Ranma did see her tears slowing.

"Your orders, Madams," the maid-waitress said, placing the plates down. "The first course. Who gets the tiramisu and who gets the parfait? And your drinks, chai, and lemonade. -And the waitress for your table should be here soon, Sir and Madam."

Ranma's mouth fell open, watering. She _was_ hungry. She was _always_ hungry. Martial arts burned a lot of calories. And she had used a lot of them doing "impossible" feats this morning. Right now, she was in the _ki_ reservoir. _Ki_ 'energy' wasn't _her_ energy. It was the ambient, _tao_ (more properly, _dao_ ) 'energy' behind everything, the source of everything _yin_ , 'female', and _yang_ , 'male'. The essence of everything else was a further combination and division of these. Everything and everybody did it, but a martial artist - _her_ kind of martial artist - knew the most direct route back up through the divisions and combinations, to reach more and more undefined 'energy' that could then be redefined, reshaped into 'impossible' techniques. Emotions were one of the most effective ways of doing that with these more or less pure _ki_ 'energies'.

She couldn't live off pure _ki_. It was too pure, too nonspecific to her needs. Carbs wouldn't help you when you needed protein. Protein could substitute for carbs, but it cost you what you needed out of the protein. But _ki_ _flowed_. The essence of everything and everybody was constantly shifting their divisions around, the speed depending circumstance of the thing or person. Being on _ki_ reservoir meant she was sort of a vampire, feeding off whatever free essences that met her needs at that time that were available around her. Stay too long in the _ki_ pool and she _would_ become a vampire - robbing others of what _they_ needed! (Strangely, the _Anything-Goes_ school had its own name for the _ki_ reservoir, the _Silky Darling_.)

So, Ranma was more than just happy to eat her parfait and drink her lemonade (that washed the pallet so she could enjoy the "everything" ice cream more!). But after a few mouthfuls (parfaits was one of the few things she was taking the time to savor, thanks to her memory of her _girls night out_ with the Tendo sisters), she remembered Akane.

She saw her chance and took a spoonful of her tiramisu. Akane looked up and was about to say how insensitive Ranma was when the spoonful was shoved into her mouth. Rather than having to embarrass herself any further by spitting it out, she chewed and swallowed it. And another spoonful followed. And another. And...She was being fed like a little kid!

And she became angry!

Ranma just smiled at her. "You're dipping into _ki_ reservoir, too.

Of course, she realized, Ranma was right. But, still, did the little redhead have to….

The pigtailed girl had gone back to just feeding herself, still smiling because she was enjoying her meal. She was sitting there in a silky lingerie, but she was sitting - acting - like a boy, besides her gross eating habits, her legs were casually apart, and wasn't caring about where her boobs were or what they were doing and just generally not being ladylike _at all_. ...And that's just the way Akane wanted to her to be.

And, come to think of it, that camisole sort of looked like a tanktop. Weren't there a kind actually _called_ tanktop? And those _tap_ panties, they sort of looked like boxers. And there were other types of lingerie that could sort of pass as men's underwear.

 _Men's Sizes._ Half a _Romeo_ was better than none. He didn't _have to_ be effeminate!

But what about the bra cups? Periods? Ranma would have to use tampons. What about…

[][][]

Before Ranma was done scraping every last bit out of the parfait glass, she felt the glow of sexiness. Good! Akane had finally come out of it and had decided to use her….

It was coming from a different direction. The dressing rooms'. Finishing her lemonade, first, she turned. This sexiness had something different from Akane's sexiness. It was darker, colder, damper, and other qualities that went under the heading, _yin_ , the essence of 'female'.

In black bra and panties with a black sheer between them, the girl her age with the high ponytail to the side was half-hugging herself, her other hand not really hiding her wicked smile of glee very well.

"She's stealin' other girl's sexiness!" Ranma said, her anger growing. If she hadn't been a girl trying to learn how to be a girl so she could recognize and know how to _not_ give in to her girl brain's impulses she would not have noticed how sexiness had worked for her friend Akane. Now, with the knowledge still fresh, she was alert for other examples of it.

And this one turned out to be bad!

"Kodachi," Akane cringed.

And Kuno cringed. Not much, but enough for Megumi to notice. "That bitch! She's done something to him." Her man!

And the girl in jewel purple lingerie was up, ready to challenge Kuno's sister. "Get lost. Kodachi! Go back to your harem!"

"Well, well, if it isn't a poser," and she did one of those annoying Noblewoman's Laugh. "Trying to _pretend_ you have what it takes to be called a real woman?"

Ranma noticed the battle of sexy battle auras. Megumi was determined to show the high-and-mighty woman (she _was_ no girl, not with that sexiness) she could be mighty, too. Having noticed, Ranma went deeper and read their potentials. Megumi was completely outclassed. This Kodachi (it seemed she should know that name) was playing with the girl (which she was, in comparison). Only the woman didn't think it was worth the effort of getting past the resistance Megumi's martial arts techniques were putting up to gather the girl's rather low-level sexiness.

Suddenly, Kodachi felt easier targets approaching.

"Akane, Ranma, we found the perfect outfits for your dates!" Akiko and Ikuko said.

"No!" Ranma leaped to put herself between them and the sexiness vampire! "Stop it!" she commanded, and found something she didn't know she had until now: _Male sexiness!_

Kodachi was so startled, she lost her hold on the path to the _ki_ energy she was using and it disappeared from this level of reality.

"You are definitely _not_ a woman among women," she said as an insult.

"I'm glad to hear that." Ranma wasn't insulted. It was something she _really_ liked to hear.

"I've never met a girl so much a tomboy." She made another attempt.

"Wow. Tell me more!"

Her tactic failing, she looked for another approach. Hadn't this small, redheaded dyke trying to be lipstick come from over there? Oh, look, is that her bottom? "I apologize. I _have_ met somebody more of a tomboy. Unlike you, _she_ is uncute."

Akane broke down and cried.

"Take that back!" Ranma demanded, furious. "Akane is not uncute! She can be just as sexy as you - _More!_ " Once she'd been properly trained.

"But, _sir_ , that is exactly why my dear brother is so infatuated with her!" And she did that awful laugh, again. But only until she 'noticed', "Oh, hello, Brother-dear."

Megumi looks at her heartthrob. Was that true? Was she going about getting him all wrong?! Wait, _did_ she want him, now? Despite what people thought, she had _never_ been a tomboy.

Stiffly, and with the dignity that slowly responding muscles provided, Kuno stood. "I do not endorse or engage in the ancient, samurai tradition of wakashu-do."

Ranma's hands went up in warding. And only she. Man, was she glad she wasn't Ranma-kun, now. And glad she was too old, probably, to be a shudo boy.

"Of course, not, Dear Brother. That would take having the actual courage to admit you prefer males," the laugh was more of scorn, this time. "Instead, you substitute young girls who are more boy than woman."

"You know that is not so, my twisted sister."

"Is that so?" Kodachi looked at Ranma. The redhead was still on guard, ready to neutralize her vampire attack.

So she attacked _Megumi!_

To Ranma, the glare of Kodachi's battle aura was nearly enough to make her squint!

And when had diminished, there Megumi stood, aged in energy, but not body, She was like a middle-aged woman who had given up her youth, no longer competing for the attentions of men. Life was now about living her life as a woman, not enjoying the fact.

Strangely, weirdly, Kuno _did_ now pay her attention. To him, she had the best of both of what he craved, a youthful body but a sexless aura.

[][][]

"How'd you like her to be your sister?" Akiko asked Ikuko. They were not the kind of martial artist that truly saw battle auras, but they had seen, did see what Kodashi's words had done to Kuno. It was almost enough for them to feel sorry for him.

"She's not the _Juliet_ -type." , "Yeah! Not like Akane this morning! So perfect!" , "I haven't stopped thinking about it, either."

Then Ranma _knew!_ For ten years she'd been trained and conditioned by her idiot pop. It took ten years to perfect her _ki_ techniques. It must have taken Kodachi ten years, too. For ten years her brother had been exposed and conditioned by her growing radiance! There had to have been times when he _had_ to have wanted her badly. But he shouldn't or wouldn't or couldn't and _didn't_ have her! Then the _Brilliant Enlightenment_ \- Nova Time came! The Breakthrough into the realm of pure _ki_ energies for the first time! When you are struggling to keep from becoming totally lost in the void of the bright, white _Essence_ and in danger of having your brain fried! For Ranma, it could have been a bigger disaster than the _Cat Fist_. Maybe some of the reason Pop was such an idiot was because some of his brain had been fried by his - or even from being too close to _her own!_ \- Nova Burst!

Kuno's brain definitely had been. He was burnt out on sexiness. It couldn't handle it any longer. His brain circuits no longer responded to it like a normal male. What he had said to Pop and them when he was at Akane's house, about the reasons he didn't use his wealth and status to go after women who didn't meet his standards, was probably true. But just because there _were_ good reasons, _did not mean_ a guy would be faithful to them. A guy's needs or just plain male pride can easily drive a normal man to overlook good sense. No, _this_ was why he lived up to those justifications! Kodachi was right, Akane was a tomboy, or at least unfeminine enough to satisfy Kuno's sister-made warped desires.

But if Akane _was_ a tomboy, it was because the innocent six-year-old had been Kodachi's _first victim!_

It wasn't a Nova Burst, but the flare was fearsome! Ranma's _ki_ was driven by the need for Revenge! Kodachi would PAY for what she had done to her _friend!_ And a new technique was born in her! So new it, she didn't know she could control it! Didn't know if she could return to the way she had been up to now! But it was worth the risk to her girl brain for the sake of Akane, her _only_ true friend.

Kodachi squinted, barely able to withstand the glare! But it was one she had never experienced before! It nearly overwhelmed her own sexiness! It threatened to explode it!

"NO! I AM the Black Rose! I am the one with the power! I am beautiful, more beautiful than all, and all must recognize it! I will _not_ be the one to submit!"

The little dyke attacked! Kodachi reached for weapons that weren't there. In this futile distraction, the redheaded demon grabbed her and spun her and forced her down onto a chair. And then

She kissed her! No, this was not right! This was not how it was meant to be! She, _Kodachi_ , was the woman with the Kiss of Submission! She made girls her thralls with it! She would _not_ be the Bottom to this little wannabe Top! She had always been and always be the Alpha! Even men must be mere Betas before her!

But she felt it! Felt stirrings that she had kept cold! Sex wasn't important to her - Power was! She didn't need sex! She didn't want sex! Sex made you stupid and stupid made you weak!

But she could not deny it. Sex wanted to break up past the dirt she had buried it in! This small pigtailed girl _WAS_ a dyke! Her sexiness was so male, even _manly!_ It was making her want, desire, yearn for more what feminine sexiness could not, _had not,_ give her! She was a woman and women-

Kodachi drew on every bit of her female, womanly sexiness she could find quickly! Her own flare burst forth to blind all who could see battle auras. "I Am Not a Lesbian!" The idea had now become absolutely revolting to her! Her sexiness stealing technique had been a no more than part of her strategy to dominate other women, to use them _not just_ as pawn and tools to her own ends, but as shields and barriers against males like her brother, the heir of the Kuno fortune and influence - just because he _was_ a male! But _Now_ it was no longer a game, something she could take lightly! This was serious - Too serious!

She slapped the impertinent, little peasant, lesbo! How dare her! How Dare her! How DARE her!

Ranma stood there in shock for a moment. Then ran, crying.

[][][]

"Just how bisexual is she?" Akiko asked in wonder at what she had just witnessed.

"Very," Ikuko answered.

"And more _she_ than he."

"Very."

"Aggressively she."

"Very."

"I'm glad she doesn't have the hots for me."

"It's not what you think!" Akane cried. "Their battle auras were intense! I've never seen battle auras like those!"

"They were fighting?" , "It looked like they were kissing." , "Martial arts kissing?" , "If you say so, Akane." , "Yeah, we're martial artists, too." , "But we've never heard of anything like that!"

"If it's that kind of fighting, I wouldn't mind fighting Ranma," Hiroshi said.

"A kiss is just a kiss. And why bother?" Megumi said. "You just get germs."

"Kodachi's germs," Akane grimaced. Those were the lips that this morning had kissed _her!_ -No! Those had been male! There was a guy brain behind them! It made a difference!

"Believe Akane, the goddess of the hunt!" Kuno said. "It is the better explanation of why the Venus above Venus, Ranma, would kiss my wayward sister."

"Wayward!? It is that dyke above dykes that is "wayward", dear brother! She is the perfect girl for you! Wed her and _you'll_ be the _bride!_ Do not be fooled by her outward appearance! She's not cute at all!"

"Thanks! Again, you say somethin' Ranma likes to hear!" a new male voice is heard.

"It's Romeo!" , "And he's dressed in...eww!" , "He's spoiling my romantic image of him."

"Gee, Romeo," Hiroshi said, "just how bisexual are you?"

The male Ranma was wearing a _Men's Sizes_ chemise tanktop and tap pants. They were blue and silk. They were plain with no lace, frills or patterns. The straps weren't strings but wide. It was as _non-_ effeminate underwear as this shop for women's apparel had to offer.

"Alright, Kodachi, this is it: The showdown! I'm sealin' your sexiness stealin' pathway! You will _never_ rob girls of their sense of worth again!"

" _You_ , wearing that lingerie for sissies, expect to be sexy? I sense from your battle aura that your confidence in…." She stopped. Her eyes widened. She could not take her eyes off of him.

And neither could Ikuko and Akiko. Or any of the other women within yards, meters of him. And, further away, those who couldn't see him, felt a charisma. Any, that was, but two. Megumi lacked an interest, now, in males. And Akane was able to close the pathway to her own sexiness and even femininity in time.

Ranma was reaching, stretching for the very essence of male sexuality! He was doing it blind! His male brain had never done this before! This path to maleness was entirely different than for his female brain! It was shorter, more direct, now - But that was what made it so difficult to control! There was violence there! The emotions were simpler, blunter! The options more restricted! Winning was more important! Cooperation was only for gain! Short-term was more attractive! Sex was just-

 _Romeo._

Whose voice was that? The girl cold water made him? Akane? _Juliet?_

For her - For _them!_ This was his short-term goal! It was for the longer-term goal of cooperation! Cooperation was winning! It opened up options! Those blended emotions and made more of them! And there was Friendship.

Kodachi snapped out of it and reach, stretched far and wide throughout her own, familiar, pathways, She would meet the threat of manliness with womanliness! She controlled her "harem" by first stealing their femininity and then giving the sexiness, even femininity of _other women_ to them only on _her_ terms! She would gather all the free and loose - and even gripped - femininity - not _just_ female sexiness - and fling it at him until the boy in lingerie would crumble and, THEN add great insult for his attempt to coerce her into the stereotypical maidenly role, she would infuse his battle aura with that stolen femininity! This peasant Romeo would be made effeminate with it! Better: It would be _all the womanliness_ that remained Akane Tendo! The Black Juliet would leave her Pale _Romeo_ a shriveled up crone in feeling!

Only…. No! Akane Tendo didn't have any she could rob! She had shut down her pathway too completely! She was too sexless! It was a mistake for her to have wasted her time on her! She HAD to concentrate on the other women! They-

No! No! NO! There _WAS_ so little, too little femininity she could grab! It was all going to Romeo! All the women in sight - even MILFs - were maidens smitten with this heartthrob! Their womanliness was part of the vortex he had created. He was feeding on it just as she had fed on the womanliness of others! Only: He was a _male!_ Too male! He was giving _them_ energy to feed off of as well, stirring up even _more_ feeling of womanliness: A bond was made between him and his admirers that _she, a woman with little masculinity_ could not break!

She had to run! She had to escape while she could! Fight another day - But RUN!

Kodachi left the chair and stumbled forward.

And into the arms of Romeo. He kissed her. And, by all that was unholy, she kissed him. Oh, this _feeling._ She had become just like these other women, who now yearned to be like her and feel Romeo's lips on theirs. Kodachi, the Black Rose had been defeated. She was merely a woman.

But how strong was the seal that kept her from feeding off of women's sense of worth as a woman?

[][][]

Tatewaki was stunned. Never had he seen his sister tear up, let alone run away from anything! She looked, dare he say, like a woman defeated by her own emotions. In fact, she was displaying emotions he didn't know she had.

"Akane," Romeo said. "Food. Lots of food!"

"Yes, Romeo! I understand! Waitress!" But all the waitresses in sight was paying attention to one person. One man. A man among men.

"I have to leave," he told Ikuko and Akiko and the other women now giving him hungry looks.

"Don't go, tall, dark and handsome," Megumi said, taking his arm and leaning her bra-covered boobs against him. A sudden eruption of womanly sexiness had filled her bareness.

It had with all the women of the shop. Ranma had not only released his hold on their sexy femininity, but that release had caused an explosion of the malestrom and all the feminine sexiness that wasn't sheltered within Kodachi was expelled from her and into the other women. All but the still closed Akane.

Ranma really didn't understand what was happening. He had been adapting techniques he knew in new and different ways until he broke through into purities he had never attained before! Or wanted. He had to command forces he didn't know. He was using uncharted pathways. He could have - maybe _did_ \- become lost! His male brain could have been fried! He could have become a macho, womanizing, bad-boy jerk! The more he used this new technique and its pathway, he _still_ could become like that! He would have all the women his new lust could handle! But…

they wouldn't be his friends. He would be lonely again. He didn't want to be a lone wolf. He did not want to be a wolf. Male or female. To him, a pack was not a circle of friends. It wasn't about the hunt.

Megumi wasn't enough of a martial artist to know how to glomp. A twist and shake of his manly, muscular arm and Ranma was free. He did not leap away. He strode. He silently ignored or shook off any attempt to talk or touch him. This made the woman desire him even more! So cool and masterful! He could be the top to their bottom, any day. But they did not follow. They were content, for the moment, to just stare in appreciation of his perfect manly, athletic physique and attitude.

"You know, Romeo actually doesn't look bad in that lingerie," Akiko said.

"Underwear. Men wear underwear," Ikuko corrected.

"It's not what you call it, it's who can pull it off," Megumi said. "And Romeo can!"

"He has the confidence to do it!," Ikuko agreed.

"He's confident in his manliness! Whatever he wears, he knows he's _male_ ," Akiko sighed.

And she wasn't the only woman that sighed as Romeo suddenly leaped out of their sights.

[][][]

The small table was overloaded with all the food of high calories the cafe menu of the shop had to offer. The waitresses all wanted to serve the sister of Romeo, this Ranma Saotome!

"Akane!" the petite yet buxom redhead cried hurrying over. She was just as the women in the shop had thought she should be: She was a feminine as her brother was masculine. Okay, maybe they exaggerated those qualities. But it was what they _wanted_ her to be like. They couldn't have Romeo, but they could have the fantasies that he now starred in. And they certainly didn't want to include another woman in them. And a woman that was his _sister?!_ And a woman that had a masculine feel, a bisexual vibe? The woman that had so blatantly kissed another woman in front of them all!? That would have been a reality. They didn't want Romeo _that way_. It wasn't part of _their_ fantasy life.

"Look, Akane!" and Ranma tugged on the " _Drawstring!_ " of her tap panties.

"Wow, this shop really does have a variety of linger, err, underwear."

"But your chemise and panties are too baggy," Akiko told her.

"They're the wrong size," Ikuko said.

"I like them," Akane said.

"As do I," Kuno concurred.

"I don't," Hiroshi said. But no one cared or even heard what he had to say.

"Kasumi will figure something out on how to make them fit." Then Akane laughed. "You're so excited about finding the perfect underwear, you're forgetting about the food!"

" _Foo~d!_ " Ranma's mouth fell open and drool dribbled down the tongue hanging out. So unladylike, Akane smiled.

[][][]

Those that remained and saw how Ranma ate were made uneasy at the sight. Never had any seen a _woman_ tear into food as fast and unmannerly as she did! How could she pack so much into that dainty little mouth of hers? Look how her boobs swung about so carelessly as she used the arms above them. Look how her legs are…. Oh, she is closing them, now. Well, not _quite_ ladylike, now, but better. And isn't she also…

Ranma had at last reached the point where, for a while, she was no longer dependent on the _Silky Darling_ of the _ki_ reservoir. Her body could be sustained by the food she had eaten. But she needed to load up on more food to put off going to the _Silky Darling_ again.

But now that she _could_ pay attention to something besides that need, there was her growing hunger to please her female audience. She remembered how women sat, and sat the same way. She didn't remember their boobs bobbing about like hers were doing, so she got those under control. Her arms slowed down and she took more dainty bites. More dainty, not real dainty, but more. (And Akane frowned.)

She didn't want to train to be sexy anymore, not then. What _was_ important to her was girl and woman training. She just wanted to blend in and not stand out. And she knew she would be great at it! When it came to techniques, she was _the Best!_


	12. Chapter 14 Dressing Up and Dating

An unusual disclaimer: Ranma ½ is a trademark of Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ Communications, and its characters have been borrowed without permission. And Son Turned Daughter was originally written way back in 2002 by the FanFiction author Tangent, and his characters Megumi, Yasushi and Ayane have, likewise, been borrowed without permission. Please see the first two chapters of this story under his pen name. This story is written for non-commercial purposes only.

[][][] [][][] [][][]

"Waitress, bring the divine Ranma more of the same. And place the banquet on my account, once more," Kuno said from the next table.

"I'm good,' the redhead in lingerie said, dropping her spoon and fork on the last of the pile of plates that somehow managed to have stayed on the small table.

"Are you sure?" the long-haired girl, also in lingerie, asked. In the, what, four days (has it _only_ been that long) Akane had known Ranma, she had come to expect her (and _him_ , she mustn't forget her _Romeo_ ) as always eating as much as she could get away with. What with everything Ranma had shown she was capable of as a martial artist, she needed a lot of food energy to turn the _ki_ reservoir tap, both off and on, less or more.

"Yeah, I'm good," Ranma patted her belly beneath the camisole. "I'm ready to face what I gotta do next on this date. I got my underwear. What's next? -Oh, that's right. I know what's next."

She jumped off the chair and did a little, skippy dance over to Kuno. "Next is to, Thank you~, Kuno-sweetie!" And she kissed him on the cheek.

Megumi growled! On her feet, suddenly, she leaned over, grabbed Kuno's head, and planted a big, wet kiss on his lips.

Kuno remained stunned until her tongue entered his mouth. He pulled away and was on his feet in one motion, his hand automatically on his bokken. "That is uncalled for, woman!"

"See? Kuno-sweetie doesn't like aggressive women. You met his sister, Kodachi!" the redhead said in the cutest voice she could muster.

"Then why aren't you being that way?" Akane said in a low voice.

"I ain't gonna risk bein' sexy unless I hafta," whispered Ranma, returning to an even more masculine - and ungrammatical - form of Japanese she usually used. _Sexy_ would mean going back into the Purities - _Female, girl, womanly purities_! She hadn't gone there, yet, and no freaking way _would_ she without a freaking good cause! "Right now, I'm goin' with the impulses my girl brain is givin' me." And, seeing that all other eyes were paying attention to the other couple, she grimaced, "It's part of my girl-practice."

[][][]

Next were the clothes that went over the lingerie, of course. They started out with the ones the Furinkan Date Management Club had chosen for their three client girls.

"No offense, but you, Akane and Megumi, have terrible tastes in clothes,' Akiko told them.

"Hey! What about Ranma(!)?!" Akane demanded to know. And so did Megumi.

"Ranma has no taste in clothes. She told us she was raised as a boy. She's never worn girl clothes before moving here to Nerima," Ikuko said. "Right, Ranma?"

"That's right. I ain't, I mean, I have worn nothin', anything, a boy wouldn't wear. Anything!" She managed to make it sound like a tragedy.

"You poor thing!" Akiko said, a tear almost coming to her eye.

"You two, on the other hand." And Ikuko pulled Akane over to stand in front of one of the shop's full-length mirrors, while Akiko, more carefully, did the same with Megumi, putting her in front of her own mirror.

"We've grown up together, Akane, I know what you wear when you're not in the school uniform."

"And _that_ is tasteless, too!" Akiko reminded them all.

"Think to your armoire, Akane, do you have _any_ in that wardrobe closet that isn't kitsch?"

"And, you, Megumi. Anything _not_ tacky?!" Akiko said to her client.

"Kitsch?" Ranma asked. There was a word she hadn't heard. "Tacky?"

"My clothes _Aren't_ kitsch!"

"I like my clothes. They say who I am!"

"Maybe kitsch is overstating it, but they look like clothes a mom picks out for her still-little girl."

"Those _Are_ the kind of clothes my mom liked me to wear!" Her dead mom. They were a way to keep her memory alive.

"But you're a big girl, now. On a big-girl date! It's time to _grow up_ , Akane!"

"And you're on a date, Megumi, not on a call."

"What did you just call me(!)?!"

"I'm a martial artist, too!" Akiko reminded her as they both got into the Stance.

"Oh, don't fight! Don't fight!" Ranma said all girly. "It's only for this one date. All we brought are our tasteless uniforms straight from school. And, remember, Kuno is paying!"

Kuno was the magic word for Megumi and she left the defend/offend Stance. "I guess _he_ doesn't like what I wear," she grumbled. "He would've noticed me like the other guys do."

[][][]

Akane agreed to wear the style chosen for her, sleekish dress but with an accordion side panel. It was somewhat hobbling, but not much. Ikuko and Akiko knew she would want something that allowed the martial artist to kick in if she had to. They also saw that the top had a simple but bold pattern, to compensate for her hips being wider than her bust.

Megumi had the opposite figure problem, so her pattern accentuated her hips. And she _wanted_ fully sleek and nearly tight. But the word "tacky" talked her out of it. Her skirt had hidden pleats.

Akane wanted red (because red had been the color of her _Juliet_ costume) and Megumi wasn't going to let her get away with that! _She_ wanted red, too!

"But you're more of a Winter!"

"You're insulting me, again!"

"White would be good on her," Ikuko said.

"Off-white."

Megumi and Akiko were able to deliver a couple of blows before Ranma could stop them. By the little woman's strength and the feel of her _ki_ , they knew they were out-matched.

In the end, Megumi got a jewel-tone purple. They were done arguing with her.

[][][]

Now it was the turn of the raised-boy, Ranma. "I want pants!" But Kuno would probably _like_ her in pants. "Maybe a skirt. Maybe." She didn't _want_ to wear a dress! It was still bad enough she had to wear a school dress. She was still enough of a guy in her memories that her body-awareness was _below_ the surface, where her muscles, tendons, and ligaments were. But she had been becoming more and more aware that girls cared about what _was_ showing. And they cared more about showing to other girls, less to guys, unless…. She was still figuring out the list of the times and reasons girls wanted and did not want guys to notice their bodies. Being a girl was complicated!

Akiko looked at Ikuko. Her leader sighed and gave in. They knew it could come to this. "Culottes"

Luckily for them (not that Ranma thought it was lucky for her), this upscale shop had a very wide selection of female ( male-to-female crossdresser) apparel. Almost.

"You'll have to wait while we get them from our warehouse," their saleswoman told them.

"We don't have time for that!" Ikuko said. "They're on a date, here!"

"Our warehouse is in our basement. With our system, we can get them to you in minutes. But you have to look through the catalog and tell us the number of the item you'd like."

So, Ranma got a good idea of what kind of skirt-like dresses - and even quite boyish pants - she could have if and when she had the money. Probably not from this store, though. _Too_ expensive!

"No, Ranma!" Ikuko put her foot down. "This is a _date!_ You're going to have to wear some that _look_ like a skirt - A skirt with _style!_ "

"But Kuno-" Oh, that's right! Kuno _didn't like_ girls with style. What kind of style was Kodachi's? Aaa! She didn't know! She didn't even _know_ what style _was!_

Hey, wait! "You girls know his sister!"

"Unfortunately, yes. We all grew up together." In fact, it turned out, they were part of the first-grade class that saw Akane kiss Kodachi and whose memory of it helped propel Akane towards her tomboy ways. Every time they heard about some other girl Kodachi conquered, they wondered why Akane hadn't been or when she would be. Akane was Kodachi's 'first love, giggle'.

"I want what she wears!"

"No!" _both_ Ikuko and Akiko _and_ Akane and Megumi told her.

Megumi still didn't understand Kuno hated his sister. She was afraid it was just the opposite. Ranma was trying to get her hooks into _Her_ man by reminding him of the sexy and stylish example Kodachi set. Which she exaggerated in her mind, just as she exaggerated things about Kuno. All, strangely, positive.

Akane didn't want to be reminded of the girl who had scarred her for life. (Well, maybe, not for life. Not now that she had Romeo for her _Romeo_.)

But it was Ikuko and Akiko that explained, "You're _too cute!_ " , "Too well built!" - "Like a brick house," growled Megumi - "And too petite on top of _all that!_ "

"Ranma, a big part of style is what goes best with the body you have," Akane said.

"What goes best with this body wouldn't go best with my, uh, a guy's body?" She saw the nods. "It's a good thing I don't care about style!" she smiled.

"You _have to_ care!" Ikuko told her. "This is a date!"

"And don't you care what other girls think of what you wear?!" Akiko told her.

"Oh, _style_ is about what girls like to see." That made sense. Guys would rather see a girl naked. "Okay! I do care what girls think of me. I'll wear what you give me - But _pants_ , only!"

"Culottes!" she was reminded, "Divided skirt!" , "Long shorts!"

"Nabiki wears pants," Ranma grumbled. "And long ones, too."

[][][]

Ranma tested them out in the shop and was satisfied she could kick in her "half-pants". Of course, she could: To her, they felt just about as loose around her legs as that Furinkan skirt she had to put up with. "Why do Akane and _her_ get to wear dresses that are closer to the legs!" she protested.

Again, _style_ was brought in. Something about having to draw attention _away_ from her boobs. Why would she want that!? That was one of the tactical advantages this body gave her!

"Yeah. They do make her hips look bigger," Megumi smirked.

"It doesn't!" Akiko was ready to fight, again, over the insult to her taste.

"It has a straight line off the hips," Ikuko explained. "And even tappers some, going down. The pleats allow for greater give when it's needed."

"It's okay, Ranma," Akane assured her. "At least the blouse matches the skirt and the blue isn't too far from what a boy would wear."

"This _ain't_ a guy color?!" Ranma said, looking down on it. "Geez! I can't tell the difference. How many colors can a girl see?"

[][][]

The shop even had a shoe department. They only had samples, though. The rest were in their warehouse. The saleswoman assured them that footwear and bags composed the majority of its space. "And we have a three-story basement."

Megumi grumbled over being too tall to wear high heels. Akane grumbled that she _may_ be made to wear high heels. Ranma told _everybody_ that she would only wear heelless or low-heeled shoes!

"But you're _short!_ You _need_ to put some height on!" Akiko told her.

"I don't like bein' short! But how am I gonna kick in the!? You have to have a solid foot on the ground! And I can't see me landin' from one a my leaps in them!"

"Ranma's right!" Akane said, eager to find an excuse not to wear them herself.

"Style!" Akiko reminded them. "Compromise," Ikuko reminded _her_.

In the end, they both wore platform shoes, 3", 7.6 cm, for Akane and 4", 10 cm, for Ranma.

"I think she could handle the challenge of even higher heels!" Akiko said.

All it took was for Ranma to hear that one word, "I can handle _any_ challenge!" Geez! Man! What was she saying!? It was taking real effort to get used to these heels! Girls must _like_ being on their "toes"; she saw girls wearing stupid heels all the time.

"These will be fine," Ikuko said. "And you only have to wear them to the end of the date." Then she went to selling her problem martial artists on what the Date Management Club had selected for them. "There are no ankles straps. Everything is held on by the counter and vamp. There are not even toes. You can get them off in a fight's hurry!"

"And they allow you to show your pedicure, Megumi said, wiggling her toes. She was not happy. Besides having to wear flats, she had opted for them being pink because that was what she already had on her toes.

[][][]

Ikuko and Akiko couldn't convince Ranma that pantyhose were too long to be panties but long enough to be pants. Akane didn't help; she seldom wore them herself. And Megumi wouldn't if her rivals didn't. She was pretty damned sure they were only pretending not to be interested in her Kuno. (As if any girl with any sense could be interested in Hiroshi.)

"Only two more stops to go, and you're free of us!" Ikuko said.

"Unless you _want_ us to hang around!" Akiko laughed.

"Yes! I do want you to go with us!" Ranma eagerly said.

"That's right," Akane understood. "Ranma was raised as a boy. She needs all the help she can get on what to do on a date." And there would be more help keeping the boys behaving, Kuno, Hiroshi and whoever else might want to break in.

"You and Megumi are here for Ranma."

Shamefaced, Akane admitted, "Uh, I really haven't been on a date, either. Not a real date. With boys."

"Wel, Megumi has…" the other two remembered the kind of dates her reputation said Megumi had.

"If it's okay with your dates, we'll stay by your sides," Ikuko said.

"I thought the Date Management Club were "chaperones without chaperoning," Akiko said.

"This is the _first date_ we're managing: It _has to_ go well!" And her eyes pointed to Megumi.

[][][]

And the other two, last stops before the date?

"No, I'm not gonna wear any jewelry! Nope, not gonna happen."

"Ranma, I know you were raised like you were a boy, but _boys_ can wear jewelry, even earrings!"

"They're something your opponent can grab onto in a fight."

"So is long hair!" , "Pigtails!"

"I _hafta_ have a pigtail! Never! Ever am I gettin' rid of it! I'll fight everybody until I'm bloody and broken before that happens!"

Akane cringed. She was glad Megumi had delayed them by retreating to the (ladies' room) trap. That girl _would_ cut off her rival's pigtail!

"Okay! Okay! But earrings-"

"Are a hassle! What if I'm out on a trainin' trip and have to decamp in a hurry!? What, Im gonna take the time to hunt for my favorite thingamawhatis if I can't find it!? And if I leave it in all the time, then…"

"Okay! No earring! No jewelry! Calm down!"

"That just leaves the beauty parlor," Ikuko, then, sighed, "and you have a problem with that, too, don't you, Ranma?"

"I can guess of what might go on in them, but I don't know. I never been in one. Never wanted to."

"A beauty parlor _styles_ your hair!" Akiko said, using one of her new favorite words.

"They have ribbons and hair ornaments?"

"Oh, we did forget those, didn't we," Akiko said, looking at Ikuko.

"That'd be one more struggle," Ikuko told her. So, the answer was: Forget it!

"Ranma, they trim your hair," Akane smiled, making scissoring motions of fingers across Ranma's bangs. "You are getting shaggy."

Ranma drew back. "I cut them myself." When she gets around to it. She liked her bangs. Besides being one of the few concessions she did to her vanity, there was her pop. Before she had _had to_ wear a pigtail because of the Dragon Whisker, she, as a he, had thought the more hair he had the more it rubbed salt into the Old Man's wound of being bald. And if he, as his son, was going to be bald one day, too, he was going to enjoy having as much hair as he could as long as it wasn't _too_ long. (Why were there so many fighters who were stupid enough to wear long hair!? Unlike her, there were plenty of opponents who would play dirty with that too long hair.)

But, in _this_ body, Ranma had another reason to want bangs, "Look!" she frowned, pushing it above her forehead. "Look how freakin' high it is! I seen babies with foreheads like this! At least babies don't got bangs!"

"Then, just a trim and a shampoo," Ikuko said.

"Shampoo!..." She looked around, apprehensive. But - Stupid! - she was talking about having her hair washed. _Washed!?_ That was _worse_ than the amazon who was out to kill her. "No! No! That means losing my pigtail!" She suddenly became afraid - Very afraid! "And _hot_ water!"

[][][]

"Come on, Ranma!" Ikuko followed Ranma as she headed back to where they had left Kuno (and Hiroshi). "I _know_ you wear makeup! Everybody can see your eyeshadow!"

"It _ain't_ eyeshadow!" she told them bluntly. "The blue on my eyelids ain't there because I want it there."

"It isn't?"

"It isn't?" Akane, being her BFF, could take her by the arm and get her to stop long enough for her and the other two to look. "You're right! I hadn't noticed before. The eyeshadows are tattoos."

The redhead scowled, "They came with the body."

[][][]

Ranma almost gave into the lipstick. Lipstick was something she thought girls wore when girls were being girls. And her girl brain _wanted_ to be a girl when she was with born-girls being girls. But…

Akane understood, "You really _would_ have to be a _Romeo_ for a man explain that much lipstick on his lips."

"Does Romeo wear lipstick, too?" Akiko asked.

" _No!_ " his 'sister' told her. "And there's a reason he has to wear underwear like you seen him in!"

"Skin condition!" Akane rushed in. "He has sensitive skin!"

"Yeah~ahh…. A man like Romeo would be sensitive," Akiko sighed.

[][][]

If Megumi _had_ gone to the ladies room, she hadn't had to go much, for they found she was back with Kuno before them. Ranma didn't leap but bounded to the samurai paying for everything.

"Oh, thank you, _Thank You_ , Kuno! You're _such_ a sweetie! Yeah! Do you like the way I look?" And she turned this way and that, making sure her culottes looked like a skirt. "Am I pretty?!"

"You are, indeed, uh, pretty."

"Yeah! I'm pretty! I'm pretty!"

"And doing a pretty cute act," Akane said under her breath.

The little redhead bounced up high enough to hang onto the tall boy by his shoulders and kissed him on the cheek she hadn't kissed earlier.

"Stop kissing him!" Megumi screamed. Ranma gladly let her yank her off of him.

But when she went to rattle Her samurai's teeth, his wooden sword was in the way. Her frustration was mounting. It wouldn't take much more before her inhibitions towards him shattered and she would _battle_ him, _force_ him, _make_ him kiss her! Fully! French! And then onto the good stuff!

Meanwhile, Akane had pulled Ranma aside and whispered, "You're not _really_ planning on actually kissing him?"

"Of course, not!" she whispered back. "I'm payin' off the debt the Somethin' says I owe the jerk a little at a time. In installments."

Something? Was there something _else_ her friend hadn't told her about? "You hope. You're playing with fire."

"Naw! Kuno don't like sexy, _or_ girly girls! He likes tomboys."

"Hey!" Akane was no longer whispering.

Meanwhile, still, Hiroshi was asking Ikuko and Akiko, "Just how bisexual is Ranma?"

"Look at which Kuno gets which kind of kiss."

All three of them nodded in understanding. "Ranma is _that_ kind of bisexual."

"And she's _my_ date!" Hiroshi wanted to cry.

"The Date Management Club can help you!" Ikuko told him.

"You have to have _style!_ " Akiko told him.

"I'm not going to dress in lady's clothes like Romeo."

"That's not what she means."

[][][]

With the ladies in their new apparel and the gentlemen in tuxedos, Kuno in a formal white and Hiroshi in a casual baby-blue, they left the store and re-entered the din of Shibuya.

"Sasuke!"

"Over here, Master!" the little ninja waved from the roof of the limo.

"Well!? Why are you waiting!? Bring the vehicle here!"

"I can't, Master. The radiator was damaged by the purse of one teenager named Miss Kotobuki! She said the limo was illegally parked. Now it's permanently parked. At least until the tow truck arrives."

"She sounds like my wayward sister. What right has she to enforce the law!?"

"Her brother is the local police officer. Here's the ticket I received from him, see?"

"We must, then, find other modes of travel."

"I'm goin' up and see what I can find!" Ranma said, leaping and leaping again, finding whatever place her platform heels could land on. Geez! It was hard to do when there was something hard between the bottoms of your feet and what you're on. And when the bottoms of her feet were more on the balls of her feet than not.

At least she was further away from the noise down below.

There were taxis below, but they were moving slowly because of how crowded it was. It'd be faster to walk, she thought.

She did see something interesting.

Coming down as carefully as she went up, her platform shoes finally landed before the others. (At least they weren't crap. They seemed to be holding up good enough. At those prices, she thought they _oughta_.) "What sort of thing do you do when you date?"

Megumi hit Hiroshi in the gut before he could answer. And she wasn't the only girl ready to do it.

"You've already eaten," Ikuko said, her, and Akiko's, stomachs growling.

"But not the _main course!_ What we had were merely appetizers," Kuno assured them. "I have reserved tables at one of the finest of restaurants for dinner."

"And we've gotten everybody dressed in their date clothes," Akiko said.

"The movie!" Akane said. Yes! Hours of not having to hear or look at these two male jerks. Or the female jerk, Megumi!

"I don't want a movie! That's boring! I want to _do_ something! I like action!"

"We can see an _action movie_ ," Hiroshi said. His look told those ready to hit him, See? I don't always have to say pervy things.

"That's not _action action!_ My whole life's been about action! I don't have to do martial arts! I get plenty of that! But I want to _do_ somethin' - And Something different!"

"So, my energetic Venus desires to dance?!" Kuno said, smiling at seeing her as she was acting less like a girl and more like a boy, now.

"Geez, no! I wanna do something I'd _like!_ Only, I don't know if I'm gonna like what I wanna try! I never tried it!"

"Have you ever _tried_ dancing?" Hiroshi, her date, asked. "You might like that!"

She ignored him. "I want somethin' challengin'!" Something that would take her mind off being all dolled up and on a date with guys.

[][][]

Meiji Jingu Ice Skating Rink, in the center of Shibuya. And as luck would have it (Ranma's luck), it was open to the public that day. It was not currently to used for a hockey game or ice show. Or was there?

"Geez! Look what the girls have to wear. I thought the tights of that _Romeo_ outfit was bad."

"I think they're having tryouts and these girls are practicing," Akane said. " _We_ can wear what we have on. Though it is chilly in here!" she said, hugging herself. How did she get talked into a neckline that exposed her entire upper chest? Though covered by her dress and bra, her nipples were responding to the cold.

"I shall rectify that matter. Sasuke!"

Yes, Master! This time I have thought ahead and bought these!" From where? He _had_ no problem going where only ladies were supposed to go. As long as he blindfolded himself.

"Long underwear!?" Ranma said.

"They are thermal bodysuits! Though, they _are_ meant to be worn under the clothes."

"They're _nude!_ " Akane cried.

"Clothes can be naked?" Ranma asked.

"It's the _color!_ See how they match your _skin!_ "

"Oh, yeah! Like that bra and panties you wouldn't let me get."

"The only _tactics_ here is staying warm!" Akane told him, remembering how Ranma want to use that lingerie to flash for her opponents. "They don't _have_ to be nude!"

"That's a strategy, not a tactic," Ikuko reminded her.

"The tactic is _style_!" Akiko told her.

"The tactic is getting noticed by the guys," Megumi said. "I think I'll wear just the…." She saw the glares coming from all the girls except Ranma. "Okay, I won't."

"Just my luck," Hiroshi said.

[][][]

They went to the rink's women's locker room to sort out which nude bodysuit would fit who and to get out of their clothes so they could get back into them.

"Oh, little Azusa does not like not being in her cute, little, 29 ft, 9 m, dressing room RV! It's like Azusa's second bedroom: All filled with Azusa's _cute_ , _adorable_ things! And just because Azusa released the emergency brake and had it roll over the mean Mikado! He shouldn't have tried to take Azusa's traffic light away from her!"

"What did she say(!)?" Akiko said.

"I don't want to know, Akane said.

"And you girls say _I'm_ warped," Megumi said.

"Oh, look! So cu~te!" the girl her own height came up to Ranma. "Red hair, blue eyes! And an adorable braid!"

"It's a pigtail."

"Braid! Braid! Azusa must have Lolita!" and she grabbed it and tried to pull it out by its roots.

"Hey! Stop that you nutbar!" Ranma pulled her pigtail out of her grasp.

"Give Azusa back her Lolita! Give back Lolita!" She cried, beating on Ranma with her fists and then her Ranma's platforms and then-

"Ranma, get back!" Akane yelled. Her mallet met Azusa's mallet with a loud wooden ka-dungk!

"You're interfering with Azusa and her Lolita!"

" _I'm_ interfering more'n Akane - That's _My_ pigtail!"

Azusa ignored the redhead and talked directly to Akane. "Azusa challenges you to see who owns little Lolita!

" _I own it!_ "

"Does it have to do with ice skating?" Akane said. "Fine! I accept!"

"Akane!" Ikuko and Akiko cried.

"When Azusa and Mikado finish practicing, then! Ooh, look at the clock! Bye, Bye! Azusa is off to be Beauty on Ice!" And she picked up her skates and left.

"Akane!" her friends said again.

"Hey, you know me! I'm the best skater in Nerima!"

"But this isn't Nerima!" , "What do you know about Azusa?!"

"Uh, the same thing as you?"

"Maybe," Ikuko said , "I think I've heard those names before, Azusa...Mikado…?" Akiko said.

"You'd better be the best! That's _my_ pigtail the kawaii thief wants!"

"I know I've heard those names before. It'll come to me."

[][][]

They were out of the locker room and ready to go out onto the ice.

Well, one wasn't. "It's all about keepin' your balance, right, Akane?!"

"There's more to it than that, Ranma. There's also inertia and momentum."

"Yes, Sensei!" her friend said. And Akane was absolutely thrilled. Ranma was _her_ teacher in martial arts, but it _she_ who would be her teacher in skating!

"Momentum, she says! A lot of momentum," Akiko said, rubbing her butt before she had even stepped out into the rink.

"If Akane can do it, _I_ can, too!" Megumi said, looking around for, and finding, "Kuno!" She waved and pushed off from the rink's sideboards.

And Ranma studied her, but only because she thought she might get some clues on how skating was done. Balance and then propel, either off the short fence or with the sides of the blades after you've turned your ankles the correct way. More of the body was involved, but the rest of adjusted around what the ankles, feet, and blades were doing.

"She's not so good," Akane critiqued under a heavy brow. "She's taking small steps. And she raises her arms out more than she really needs to."

"Oh!..." Ranma _thought_ she was coming towards an understanding.

Megumi surprised them all with a spin, one leg back while her back was arched, and her eyes - as long as the spin allowed at any one time - on Kuno.

"The attitude spin, of course," Akane really frowned this time. "It's just like her to know flash before she has the fundamentals down."

"Oh, yeah!" Ranma hit the palm of her hand. "You can do more than just go forward."

"Or fall!" Akiko said.

There was a guy, a guy, in fact, who looked a lot like Ranma when she was a he, who was with what looked like his girlfriend. The bob-haired girl at least knew how to stay on her feet.

"Man! I'd hate to be a guy, now. Where's his male pride? Give it up and take lessons, first, man!" But she was a girl, now, and hadn't developed much female pride. If she fell, there would be much loss of face. _And_ her butt was more padded.

[][][]

"Bwee! Bwee~ee!"

"Charlotte! Charlotte! Come back, little Charlotte!" It was that over-aged brat, again, and she was skating after a little, black pig.

Little, black pig? And with the same yellow bandana around its neck! "Burin-kun!" Ranma cried, dashing out onto the ice.

And slipping, and almost falling, and slipping, and almost falling...

"Ranma!" Akane cried, coming to her rescue.

And she did! The smaller girl was able to hold onto somebody more steady on her skates and steady her.

But she didn't take the time to thank her, "You can fling me, right?"

"Fling?"

"Aim me at the pig! I'll explain later! Besides, that wacko Azusa wants him!"

"Okay!" And Akane did!

Using her hands and arms a lot, the light redhead was able to stay on her feet, though her ankles wanted to turn. She would've thought at least her landings would have given her stronger ones. She almost lost it and had to bend over low.

It was perfect timing for she was in the right position to gather up Burin-kun in her arms - just as Azusa's mallet whizzed over her head!

"Give Azusa back her Charlotte! Give back Lolita!"

Again it was the battle of the hammers! This time, both were sent against the sideboards on the opposite sides of the rink. At least Akane (and Azusa) didn't crash into them.

"Don'tchyou worry, Burin-kun, I got you!" All Ranma had to do was let her momentum carry her to a sideboard and then turn and push off for the gate off of the rink.

Still confused, Burin-kun looked up at who had it _this_ time - And saw the red hair and pigtail! (barely, her boobs being mostly in the way).

It growled and opened its mouth to use its teeth-

But before it could bite, Ranma Saotome was stopped and held solidly on the ice by another guy.

"I see you have not perfected the Art of Skating as yet," the overly handsome guy said."Let me assist you."

"No, Mikado!" cried more than one girl whose voices Ranma did not recognize. Ranma _did_ recognize their costumes. They were the colorful one-pieces of the girls who she was glad she didn't have to change into.

"We hear you and Azusa are breaking up!" , "We're here to audition for you!" , "We're can replace Azusa!" , "Especially if _you_ train us, Mikado."

"Ladies, as much as I would wish otherwise, the Golden Pair will always be together. Forever, I'm afraid." Then a sudden gleam appeared in his eyes. "Of course, if Azusa should no longer be able to compete."

"Mikado! Mikado! Is that you! It is _you!_ You dyed your hair blonde, again. Azusa does not _like_ you in blonde hair! Azusa already _has_ Barbie!¨

¨Get away from my hair, Wrench! I do not want you to do what you did with my hair that last time you chopped it off and called in Barbie!

"Is she related to Headmaster Kuno?" Ranma had to ask. It'd make sense. They were both _insane!_

And speaking of insane, the younger male Kuno was running over, and not on the ice, either. "Unhand the fair Venus, Ranma, you cad!"

Kuno's problem was that he had to stretch his sword out over the sideboards, and his wooden sword was _still_ inches away from this Mikado character.

Charlotte finally asked itself why it was paying attention to all this chaos. It shook its head, and Burin-kun was ready to bite the hand that held it.

"Charlotte! Give Azusa back her Charlotte!"

But before she could take it from Ranma, one of the audition girls snatched it first. "If you want it, you have to come and get it, Azusa!" she taunted, skating off with it.

"Give Azusa back her Charlotte!" And she skated off after her.

Then them. All the audition girls were teaming up against the annoying brat. As soon as she came close to grabbing the pig, it would be tossed to another girl and so on in _Keep-away on Ice_!

Azusa only played their game for so long. Then she - and they - made sure it was no longer a game. A leg would trip one girl, sending her sliding belly and boobs down across the ice. She would spin in a blur and get a solid hit against the next girl's torso and send her skating pell-mell into the sideboards. A jump and a kick to the gut is what a third girl received.

But there were a few girls she _really_ didn't like. "Uncute! Uncute! Your costumes are uncute!" And she slashed them to ribbons with the razor-sharp blades of her skates. And not just the costumes, either. Real skin was showing behind the cuts to their thermal bodysuits.

"UNCUTE!" Akane over-reacted at just hearing the word! She skated full force at her!

Azusa spun in time to see her: But her leg was still up. And her blade severed the head from the handle of Akane's mallet. "Oh, look what you did to Sartre!" she accused.

"Akane! Burin-kun! Hey, you! Miki-"

"Mikado, lovely-"

"Whatever! Fling me over to them!"

"And my reward?"

"Forget it!" She told him, shoving herself off of him and making it to the nearest sideboard.

"Venus! You have come to me!" Kuno reached out for her.

He was too slow. Man, did she have to get back to acting girly!

Ranma put a blade up onto the sideboard and pushed herself off - into the air! "Yeah! Mid-air! _This I can do!_

"What?!" Looking down, she saw that Mikado skated faster than she could rise and fall.

He was between Akane and Azusa when he caught her.

And he also took the pig away from the unfortunate girl that still held it. "Yours?" He asked Ranma.

"Charlotte is Azusa's!"

But Lolita would be easier to take. All she had to do was cut it off the redhead with a blade of her skates.

"And, now, for my reward. 899."

"Eight hundred what?" Ranma asked.

"You will be my 899th kiss."

"Like -Ow!" At just the wrong moment her mouth was open because the swine had bit her.


	13. Chapter 15 Make a Habit of It

An unusual disclaimer: Ranma ½ is a trademark of Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ Communications, and its characters have been borrowed without permission. And Son Turned Daughter was originally written way back in 2002 by the FanFiction author Tangent, and his characters Megumi, Yasushi and Ayane have, likewise, been borrowed without permission. Please see the first two chapters of this story under his pen name. This story is written for non-commercial purposes only.

[][][] [][][] [][][]

"NO!" Akane screamed, yanking to free Ranma by her skate boot even as she shoved to get the boy away from her friend.

Mikado remained unmoved on the ice. But he, being a womanizer, not a misogynist, had held the little redhead gently.

The 100 lb, 45 kg, Ranma (and Burin-kun) was sent flying over the ice, through the air!

Azusa's blade only trimmed the very tip of the redhead's pigtail.

Ranma did a mid-air maneuver and landed on her own skates. Then after that, she had no control! She - and the pig that had stopped biting her because of its surprise - hurled across the ice. She was coming to the sideboards of the rink fast!

She raised her foot, ready to push off of the wall and going leaping, mid-air, back to attack the guy who had come within a lips' graze of being her first kiss from a human _man!_

The little woman in a blouse, culottes and nude bodysuit fell! She slid. Until - her skates up in the air - her plump girl-butt slammed into the wall.

Meanwhile, Mikado's arms had replaced the redhead with the long-haired girl. "You are jealous. You needn't be," he said suavely. " _You_ may have the honor of being 899th."

"What!? You want _me_ to kiss you!?" Akane was angry.

"No...you _want_ me to kiss you."

"In your wildest fantasies!"

"No, my lovely. In yours."

Ranma had twisted around, one elbow on the ice and one hand on the pig, in time to see this scene.

And another threat to her and Akane, on top of that. "Lolita and Charlotte! Azusa is coming for you!"

The still-pigtailed girl looked at the little creature that had bitten her. "You're not the first animal to bite me. You're wild. And confused. I understand. But - Sorry!" And from her awkward position, she threw it at Mikado!

It bounced off the skater boy and landed in Akane's hand. She automatically held on and raised it as a shield. The too handsome jerk kissed the forehead of the pig.

The little, black pig got angry!

"Mikado! Look at Aki! You've kissed me _once!_ "

The costume of one of the audition girls was in shreds. Only her nude bodysuit protected what modesty she possessed.

Burin-kun at first didn't realize it _was_ just a nude bodysuit. It thought she was showing _everything!_ And the slash that revealed one of her nipples told it the truth.

But it _saw_ the exposed nipple!

"Vile animal!" Mikado screamed as an eruption of nose blood splattered on him. "Look what you've done to my performance suit!"

"You leave the poor animal alone!" Akane yelled, clutching it and twisting to keep it away from the beast. Her knee came up and rammed into his gut.

Being distracted meant he no longer had a solid stance on the ice - The Great Mikado of the _Golden Pair_ was sent sliding yards backward.

And Kuno raced in the aisle behind the sideboards to finally be where his wooden sword could inflict justice upon the unmitigated philanderer!

"Charlotte! Charlotte! Come to Azusa!" the other half of the _Pair_ cried, skating towards the cute and adorable little thing. In her hand was a little mallet labeled, _Marianne_.

"Akane!" Ranma cried, and used her legs to launch herself over the ice - belly down!

She grabbed the kawaii-overdose wackjob by the ankles. She had sacrificed her dignity for her friend, as Azusa's butt landed on her back.

And they both go sliding over the ice. Towards Mikado. And Kuno.

"Lolita!" Azusa cried, seeing the red pigtail between her thighs.

And that wasn't chaotic enough?! Cowardly Hiroshi had also joined them in his skates.

"I hope the Date Management Club knows what it's doing. I hope it's worth the date they promised to get me."

Ikuko and Akiko had found their way into the AV room of the ice rink.

Music started playing.

Unfortunately for Hiroshi what had been set up to play had been selected by Mikado. It was an oldie, but one he considered appropriate: Kung Fu Fighting Dance (Fatboy Slim, Remix),

"... _Everybody was_ Kung Fu Fighting! _Those fists were as fast as lightning! ..._ "

Inspired, Mikado played with the "cosplay samurai" who didn't even dare to be on the ice. He spun like a whirlwind, his fists repeatedly striking the bokken. Soon the fool would no longer be able to hold onto his wooden sword, lose it, and he, Mikado Sanzenin, of the Ice Cream Shop of Martial Arts, would use his fists directly!

But Kuno's own bokken could be (nearly) as speedy!

Ranma was using her fists as well: She smashed hers into the solid ice, reaching the cold floor beneath. Not having to think about sliding, now, she whipped her back!

Azusa was hurled off the redhead's back. And at Mikado! Being his perfect partner - on ice but nowhere else - she knew how to grab him without being hit by fists which were " _...a little bit frightening…_ " to others.

Kuno, of course, did not understand this. "I shall save you, Miss!" he vowed and made to pull her to safety.

Mikado was still spinning. So, Azusa was spinning. So-

Kuno found himself sliding heels-only along the ice. Straight at Akane.

After her blow, he found himself still on his feet but sliding towards Hiroshi!

In perfect timing, without really noticing Kuno coming towards them, Hiroshi and Megumi separated to the beat of the music. "Damn, Hiroshi! Who would've thought you were good at dancing. And on skates, too!" Okay, maybe the music wasn't unfortunate for Hiroshi.

[][][]

"ENOUGH!: Ranma cried. "This has gone on long enough!" Too long, probably.

The little, pigtailed girl struck the ice blow after blow after powerful blow! The ice below her fists cracked. The cracks spread. Then most of the rink became unskatable. (Hiroshi's and Megumi's remained skate-dancing in their little area.)

"How dare you violate the sacred rink!" Mikado glared at the girl. "Now I _must_ kiss you!"

"WHAT!?" Ranma cried. "Bein' kissed by you _would_ be punishment! But that don't keep you from soundin' as crazy as her!"

"Kiss her, Mikado! Then make her give Azusa her Lolita!"

"Quiet, Wench! You're not supposed to tell others about the power of my kisses!"

"Oh! So that's _why_ you've kissed Eight Hundred-somethin' girls! Now, I'm _really mad_! I've already dealt with somebody like you today. Kodachi! You probably know her!"

"No, I have not."

"Azusa knows her! Azusa makes her sick!"

"You make _everybody_ sick, you eighteen-year-old Brat!"

"I can believe that." Ranma got into the Stance on the chunked ice, her hands bruised and ice-cold. But the energy of her _ki_ was heating them and her. "I'm takin' your lips down!"

"I don't fight women, only fight them off," he said, running his fingers through his hair.

"Now, _I'm_ gonna be sick!"

"Azusa fights women!" And jumped at the chance.

"How long is this going to continue?" Hiroshi asked Megumi. "The music's stopped."

Before Azusa could reach the redhead, she reached Charlotte.

Akane had thrust out the little, black pig into her path. And as Azusa was hugging it to her, Akane took the skate she had in the other hand and sliced through the annoying little-girl woman's costume.

Burin-kun wasn't sure if it was seeing nude or nude bodysuit. But it didn't matter. Its imagination had been primed - It still got yet another nosebleed!

Azusa screamed - And threw the terribly un-,un-, _uncute_ beast down at the ice where it belonged!

Ranma dived and saved Burin-kun.

"That is _two_ performance suits the pig owes us," Mikado said. "I assume you two are responsible for it."

Ranma had rolled and was back on her feet. "Here, Akane!" she said, tossing the pig to her. To him, she said, "Let's see how great you are when I got solid footin'!"

"Kiss them, Mikado! Kiss them! Put them under your Spell!" Azusa demanded.

"Shut up! It doesn't _work_ like that, yet, you idiot!" He would _have t_ o find a way to keep you from blabbing about his Spell of _A Thousand Kisses_! If he _had_ that last kiss, he could control even the woman he wanted to control the most - Azusa!

"899th kiss, uh!? I get it!" Akane said, now holding up both in her oh hands the skates she had taken off because she could no longer skate on the ruined ice.

"Me, too!" Ranma said. "My guess is you can only kiss a girl _once!_ So, if I kiss you _twice…._!"

"Then you will also be my 900th kiss."

"I _think you're bluffin'!_ " And she jumped at him.

He dodged.

But he wasn't used to _avoiding_ girls. (He couldn't even avoid Azusa!) And the little redhead grabbed and held on.

Her knees digging into his gut, and pulling on his fancy shirt, Ranma forced her lips onto his!

Wow! What a kiss! It was so powerful - it propelled her off of him! Rip! went his shirt.

"Eee!" Akane cried. Blond smoke shot off from his head. He was left with charred, blackened hair.

Mikado's knees knocked together and he collapsed to the broken ice. His didn't look so much as handsome as stupid. And helplessly disgusted.

"Azusa has never seen a kiss do this to Mikado," she said, pulling at the tongue that was hanging out.

Ranma saw and got an idea. "Hey, Azusa! I got a reputation for bein' bisexual!"

"Bisexual?"

"It means I also kiss _girls!_ "

Azusa screamed and ran as fast as her skates could take her over the broken ice.

[][][]

"How many more First Kisses are you going to have today!" Akane frowned. "The more you do, the _less special_ you make _ours!_ "

"These _weren't_ First Kisses! Only _Real_ Kisses count! I didn't wanna do them: I _hadda!_ "

"So, are you going to kiss Kuno and get it over with? On the lips? Maybe some tongue?"

"Never! Kodachi and Mikado were because I hadda 'cuz I'm a martial artist, defendin' the weak!"

"Gee, Martial Arts Kissing. Maybe Ikuko and Akiko have a point. Even I'm beginning to find it hard to believe."

"It's true! I know how my kiss stopped Kodachi from stealin' other women's sexiness. You know it as well as I do. You _know_ about the _ki_ reservoir. She's - was! - a vampire on it! She had to make herself 'hungry' for even more sexiness by passin' a little onto other girls. It's then like she's a drug dealer! They _had to_ come to her for their sexiness fix or become like you. Akane!"

"Hey! You're my friend - _Until_ you keep insulting me!"

"Sorry, Akane! Really! Anyway, that Mikado didn't use the reservoir. But I think I know how I blew Mikado's mind and spell. I'm really a guy! _Too much of a guy!_ " Ranma proudly said. "His spell was only for _real_ girls! It might have been able to handle me if _he_ kissed me with him thinkin' he was kissin' a girl. But _I_ was doin' the kissin' and I _knew_ I wasn't enjoyin' it 'cuz _I'm a guy!_ " And she laughed with relief at that knowledge!

"Okay. But what about Kuno? You've already kissed one guy. Get it over with!"

"I won't because of the Somethin'!"

Akane noticed Burin-kun ( _Burin-kun?_ Couldn't Ranma come up with a cute name for this cute, little pig that reminded her of stuffed, plushie animal?). It was stirring in her arms, trying to recover from its nosebleeds. "Burin-chan needs to eat something to bring his strength back up. I'm going to ask Kuno if-Eee!"

The runt ninja had found a trapdoor in the floor which he could use now that the rink ice was broken and loosened. "My Master has given his faithful retainer, Sasuke Sarugakure, orders to cater to you ladies every whim! I shall get something for the pig.

"I shall, then, return to the shop you were at before and return with duplicates of those clothes you have on now. They are covered in pig blood, after all."

Akane looked at her new outfit. "You're right!" She had been getting so used to fighting the Hentai Horde and getting their blood on her she hadn't given the pig's blood enough thought.

"If Kuno don't like my bloody clothes it's okay by me."

"That's not a very girly attitude, Ranma."

"You're right! -Oh, would you really do that for little me, little m-no: Mr. Honorable Ninja, Sasuke?!"

"Honorable? Mister? And she even called me by my given name." Once he got over the shock, his grin threatened to be wider than his round face. "Yes! Of course, I will Ranma-sama! I shall do it at once!"

"Hey! What about something for B-chan to eat!"

[][][]

"His name is Burin-kun!" Ranma insisted. "He's a _guy(!)_ Guys don't _like_ havin' a "-chan"."

"Well, this guy seems to like it! Don't you, B-chan, baby!" Kuno had bribed somebody to open up one of the concession stands and she was now feeding it nibbles of ice cream bars. And the pig was enjoying itself in her lap.

"At least call him _Burin_. Geez, B-chan sounds…." she remembered Akane's temper and stopped herself.

"AH, yes! _Burin_! The name stirs memories," Kuno said as all the daters sat in the nearly deserted food court. "You all know, I am sure, that I am a collector and connoisseur of the classics! I have, of course, the complete recordings of _Tunde Burin_ \- _Thunder Pig!_ "

"Is that where he got the idea to be the "Blue Thunder"?" Ranma muttered.

"Was that the cartoon that was translated into other languages a _Super Pig_?" Hiroshi asked.

"Bwee! BWEE!"

"It likes it! Hey, B-chan!" Ranma called.

The little, black pig shook its head.

"Burin-kun!"

"Bwee! Bwee!"

"It's name is _Burin-kun_!" The pigheaded, pigtailed girl had won at something else that day!

"Wasn't it about a little girl who gained super-powers when she put on a pig's nose and turned _into_ a pig?" asked Hiroshi.

" _Burin-_ chan _!_ " Akane stuck her tongue out at the pigtailed girl.

"It's got a curly tail!" Megumi noticed. "Hey, Date Management, maybe you should get Ranma's pigtail to have a curl, too!" Smirk!

"The _pigtail_ holds an interesting place in Chinese history," Kuno said, ready, of course, to impress others with his knowledge of lore. This time historic.

"Didn't you say you were in China before you came to Nerima, Ranma?" Hiroshi had a good memory for anything that involved girls, even if he wasn't good remembering his homework.

"I certainly got my pigtail in China," Ranma scowled. Among _other_ things!

"When the Mongols conquered China, they wished to make those proud people feel humiliated and subjugated. So they forced the men to wear pigtails, queues. It wasn't because they were symbolic of pigs but, rather, of what the Mongols did to the tails of their horses. And, so, they rode their subjects.

"And, to this day, the Chinese do not like to wait in queues," he finished with perfect Kuno logic.

"Gee, Ranma, your name really _is_ "Wild Horse"," Hiroshi said.

"A _Wild_ one that can't be conquered!"

Akane frowned and said more to herself, "I think Kasumi's right. It's better spelled, "Chaos Orchid"."

[][][]

Sasuke finally arrived with the bags with the duplicate of Akane's dress and Ranma's blouse and culottes.

"May I hold Burin-chan?" Akiko asked as they were about to leave to change in the ladies' room.

"I'd like to pet him, too," said Ikuko , "Eh, why not," Megumi said, reaching to pet it as Akane gave him to the others. "It's still a pig, though."

So, it was just her and Ranma in the ladies' room. And as they were changing out of bloodstained clothes and bodysuits, going all the way down to their lingerie, and into nicer new clothes, Akane asked her friend, "What other truths haven't you told me about, Ranma? How can I help you if I don't know what _will_ help?"

"Let me see...I told you about my Jusenkyo curse," and the redhead started counting on her fingers. "And Shampoo and the amazons…. You know about my hair curse…. I was going to tell you why I wear Chinese clothes...but probably not anymore. Have I told you about the _Cat Fist_ , yet?" She had a handful, and she wasn't done _yet_.

"What about _Kuno(!)?_ Why won't you kiss him and get it over with?! You said something about something!"

"Yeah. That." Ranma frowned glumly. "The _Something_ is a curse, too. It's maybe part of the curse that's tryin' to make me a girl in my mind and not just my body. You know, even when I have my guy brain back? But it ain't doin' it honestly by doin' it directly! It's doin' it by makin' me too freakin' honest!"

"Honestly, _honestly?_ How is being honest going to make you a girl?"

"I don't know! Not exactly. It's takin' what I don't like about my pop, what I feel guilty about, and reinforcin' me wantin' to be honest, you know, not takin' anythin' from anybody without askin'. I can't even tell myself I'm just borrowin'! Sometimes the _Something_ won't even let me ask! And I don't really know what me havin' to accept gifts has to do with keepin' me honest.'

"Hmm," Akane thought. That day, Ranma had rescued her from her nightmare of Kodachi - _Twice!_ First by becoming her _Romeo_. And then by confronting Kodachi herself and sending her off crying! And, now, it was what she did to Mikado. "It has to do with you being a hero? Maybe?"

"What?!"

"Why did you go to the Cursed Training Ground?"

"To become a better martial artist, of course!"

"And beyond the usual reasons, why do you want to _be_ a martial artist?"

Ranma scratched her head. "Besides doin' what pop made me do so I could be the best? I guess the only reasons I have are what the Code says I should have."

"Then _that's it!_ The Code says you should protect the weak - Be a hero!"

"Okay, if that's true, what do gifts have to do with bein' a hero, then, huh?!"

"Uh, you have to be strong to accept a gift? -Oh! It's something a guy might not understand! A girl accepts a gift even if she didn't ask for it or wants it because she doesn't want to hurt their feelings. That can be sort of heroic because she's helping them feel something like a hero themselves. Especially, if they have to sacrifice something for the gift! No, wait, maybe that last part is about being a damsel."

"See!? Havin' to take gifts ain't bein' a hero."

"Damsels can be heroines!" But even Akane was finding that hard to believe. Wouldn't that make Big Sister Kasumi a heroine? No, she didn't receive many gifts. She was the one who _gave_ gifts. Everyday. And always. _She_ was the one who makes sacrifices.

"What you're tryin' to make me believe is, Jusenkyo _really is_ a trainin' ground. And it's makin' me a better martial artist by cursin' me with people and things I have to be a hero against or for?"

"A hero and a heroine!" Akane smiled. It did not last. "Or maybe just a -Wha, what if you _fail_ at being a heroine, you become _just the kind of girl your dad's told you girls are!_ "

A look of horror came to Ranma's face. "I think I'm gonna be-"

"Burin-chan got sick!" Akiko said, coming into the ladies' room. There was some puke on her clothes.

"Yeah. I don't think pigs are lactose tolerant," Ikuko said, following her. There was little on her, too. "This one isn't!"

While they were using the sinks, Megumi came in. "Don't blame me, but that pig got lost!"

" _Lost!_ " Akane cried.

"How does a pig get lost?" Ranma asked.

"As soon as it was feeling better, it jumped out of my hands and headed for here. But he ended up in the men's room next door!"

"I'm goin' in…. No, I guess I'm not." The looks on the born-girls' faces told her they wouldn't like her to go there. "Geez, right. It has to come out of there sometime," she said in girl-speak.

But when they came out of the ladies room, they saw Hiroshi come out of the men's. He told them there was no sign of any pig in there.

"Last I saw of Kuno, he was chasing after a naked man holding a bandana over his dick."

"He's trying to be a hero," Akane nudged Ranma.

"I still ain't gonna kiss him," Ranma growled back. "That'd be me bein' a damsel. I'll kiss if I have to if bein' a hero says I have to, but that's it! I ain't gonna kiss because no curse is tryin' to force me to! I'm the _Wild Horse! I won't be conquered!_ "

The others tried to figure out what she (and Akane) were talking about. "Shit! All that fuss over mercy kissing," Megumi said.

"I wish some girl would have mercy on me," Hiroshi said, reminding himself not to cry.

[][][]

"That flouter of all public morality and decency did evade this expert hunter!" Kuno told them on returning.

"You mean you lost him," Hiroshi said.

"What did you just infer?" Kuno said, the tip of his bokken now under the peasant's chin.

"- _He_ got lost, you _didn't!_ (?)" He let a sigh of relief when Kuno took the wooden sword away.

"Is this date almost over with?" Ranma asked, hoping it was, of course.

"I'm afraid not, Ranma. But we can't use the rink anymore. It's closed for today," Akane said.

"Let's go dancing!" Megumi said, taking Hiroshi's hand and doing a dance step or two.

"I don't dance, don't ask me," Ranma said. Especially if it involves having to touch a guy like Megumi was doing.

"A movie!" Akane returned to her preferred date activity.

"There's not enough time for one before the dinner part of the date," Ikuko told them.

"I'm sure the proprietor of the restaurant where I have made reservations will accommodate our having a later dining time," Kuno bragged.

"A movie it is!" Akane smiled.

"Pachinko!" Akiko spoke up. After the looks she got, she said, "Well, during the last date I was on, months ago, we played pachinko. It's the very Japanese thing to do."

"You were younger, then, Akiko," Ikuko said. "Let's see. This is Shibuya, so there are museums…"

"Including the Yebisu Beer Museum," Megumi said.

"...there's the parks, like the Olympic Park…"

"We're _always_ walking in Nerima," Hiroshi complained. "We don't even use _bikes!_ "

"Walking is what all need to achieve fitness and maintain health!" Kuno told him. "Look no further at my own example!"

"The best place to walk and shop in Shibuya is Cat Street-"

"No! No, C-C-Ca- What she said!" Ranma told them adamantly.

Akane's friend-antenna went up! She had to help! Why? She didn't know, but Ranma hadn't said something in the ladies room about -Oh, she'' find out later! "The NHK Broadcasting Center is in Shibuya! Maybe there's a show we can watch!"

"NHK Nodo Jiman!" Megumi said. "We can audition to sing on TV! That's _better than_ karaoke!"

"Only, that show _goes to_ where the singers are. They'd have to come to Nerima," Akiko said. "But there's _Fashion Contest!_ " And she looked at Ranma and Akane, "It's _anything-goes_."

"There's _Imagine-Nation!_ " said an adult who looked vaguely familiar, even to Ranma.

"That's the show were anything that has to do with mangas, anime or video games are shown and talked about!"

"And I even interview the creators! I'm Toru Ono!"

After hesitating, Akane blurted out, "Ono?! That's Dr. Tofu's family name! We're all so familiar with him in Nerima, we use his first name."

"And many call me Toru, too," he smiled. "I'm Tofu's brother. Younger brother."

[][][]

It wasn't long before they were all inside Mr. Kyo's mobile studio-office-dressing room RV. With all the things it had to carry, there still managed to be room for the seven of them and him. (Though, not for his crew. Except for the driver and a passenger, they had to find other means to go back the NHK Center.)

"Actually, I'm don't just work for Image-Nation. I do any broadcasting activity where they need my voice, and _sometimes_ my face." Yes, he was handsome, Akane thought. He could almost make her forget about her crush on his older brother. And that _voice_ was so smooth and male. How bisexual was she? She was beginning to realize just how non-bisexual she may be.

"Did Dr. Tofu ask you to look for us?" Megumi asked, looking at the Date Management Club suspiciously.

"No. To be honest, we haven't talked to one another for a while, now. I was at the skating arena because I wanted to broadcast the next match of the _Golden Pair_ of Kolhotz High."

"Mikado and Azusa!" Akiko cried. " _That's_ why I know their names! They're the best high school figure skating martial artists there is!"

"Martial Arts Figure Skating?" Akane had to ask.

"Now she tells us," Ranma said, rolling her big blue eyes, not impressed with its game sense.

"Well, I arrived too late. Did you see what happened to them and the rink?" (They all nodded. Akiko was about to say something, but both Ikuko and Akane hit her arms at the same time.) "I'm not interested in news. I'm not a reporter. So, I was leaving when I heard you people mention Nerima."

"Where your _brother_ lives!" Akane made the connection.

"Why haven't you talked with Dr. Tofu for a while?" Ikuko asked, suspicious.

He handed her his phone. "Why not call and ask him yourself."

[][][]

"I guess if the Doc says he's okay, I guess we can spend some date-time here," Ranma said, looking casually around the studio basically empty of people but full of equipment, props, and costumes.

"He also said we are to be on our guard with him," Kuno said, his hand near his wooden sword.

"I'm sure we can trust him!" Akane defended. "He _is_ the brother of Dr. Tofu!"

"He only meant that Mr. Toru is in broadcasting!" Ikuko said. "They're always looking for something to fill their airtime."

"Yeah!" Megumi said, a big dressing room RV star in her eyes.

"But he if he _does_ not want to do news. Ayane isn't going to like that." And Akiko wasn't too thrilled either.

"Ayane is a gossip," Megumi said.

"Exactly," Akiko said.

"Ayane knows all the gossip on you, Megumi," Ikuko said. "Do you still _want_ to become a celebrity?"

Megumi gave her just the kind of expression she was looking for. That was one less problem she had to manage on this date. Hopefully.

She did not see the reaction of Ranma. Akane failed to notice, too. Her eyes were still on Dr. Tofu's younger brother. He was much more her age. Though, her doctor did things to make himself _look_ younger than his brother. Besides, Dr. Tofu was so in love with _her_ big sister, Kasumi, he hadn't really dated anybody for years now! (No, Akane, don't think of how very _young_ Kasumi was when he began wanting her!)

"Uh, maybe I don't wanna take the TV tour," Ranma said. "I, I really don't watch TV. Or go to the movies. Or read mangas. Or play video games. Or…"

"Look!" Akiko cried, running over to where different clothes and parts of outfits were hanging from racks or in bins. "These are left over from _Fashion Contest!_ "

"Hey, I can use this mike to sing like I'm on _Nodo Jiman!_ " said Megumi.

"Dress up in one of these costumes and pretend you're an idol!"

"What, you don't think I look good in what I'm wearing? _You_ picked this dress out for me, Akiko!"

"I _didn't_ pick out that awful color! It doesn't suit you, Megumi!"

"Don't you two go fighting again!" Ikuko said.

"Why don't we _all_ dress up as idols! It'll be fun!" Akane said.

"Akane, I don't think that's a good idea! Ranma tried to warn her friend to back off.

[][][]

Of course, Ranma lost the argument. Her girl brain just couldn't resist being one of the girls by joining in.

But, then, Hiroshi also got into costume. And Kuno? He thought his white tuxedo was outstanding in and of itself. Hiroshi sort of agreed, "You know, before today, when I thought of tuxedos, I thought of _Sailor Moon_ and Tuxedo Mask. Of course, he _did_ wear white as the Moonlight Knight."

"You simpleton. Have you not watched any _James Bond, 007_ movies?"

"Have you?" Hiroshi got no answer. Apparently, Kuno's tastes did not go in that direction. If it did, he might not be wearing his "samurai" kendo-gi so much.

"I think he looks a lot like Shutaro Mendo, of _Urusei Yatsura_. Though, his was usually a white plebe uniform," Mr. Toru said. "And he, too, always had a sword or some weapon he was expert in."

"Wasn't he a character in that anime about a green-haired-and-horns alien princess oni?" Hiroshi asked. He remembered _Lum_ not so much by her name as by her furry, tiger-striped bikini. "Mendo was supposed to be the richest kid in Japan."

"Do tell," Kuno said smugly."What an apt comparison, then."

"He had the hots for the main girl-character, but he was always made a fool of by the main guy-character."

"You go too far!" and his wooden sword was again near the throat of Hiroshi.

"Don't go acting like Ataro Moroboshi!" Mr. Toru laughed. "I've been doing my homework for my interview with Rumiko Takahashi. She also had another successful manga and anime at the same time, _Maison Ikkoku_. But she has stopped doing those and is now looking for an inspiration for another new series. She said she wants another _Shinobu Miyake_ -like character and _will have_ her be the female lead as she had originally intended for _Those Obnoxious Aliens_."

Both Akiko and Ikuko looked at each other, then laughed.

"What's so funny?" Akane asked.

"Nothing!" they said. Then laughed again.

Finally, Akiko couldn't resist. "Isn't it rumored she is bisexual or something? She created the first sort-of gender bender in anime that was supposed to be taken a serious, right? I mean, _Ryunosuke was_ a regular on the show."

Megumi frowned. "Hey, I just remembered being called a _Ryunosuke_ just because I get into fights! If there's _any_ girl like that whose dad raises her to be a boy, it's-" Suddenly, _she was_ laughing, too!

Only three of the group are laughing. Hiroshi was too focused on the girl that flew around in the bikini (and the interesting POV the viewer got of different parts of her mostly exposed body). "Is she going to have another _Lum, the Infamous_ -like character?" Oh, he did remember her name.

"The Princess of Mangas just about has to. That type of character is very popular among readers. But she swore she wouldn't let the girl take control of her story like she had with the other. She probably won't come from outer space, but she probably _will be_ an alien. Perhaps from China."

" _China!_ " And there was a fresh outburst of teen-girl laughter.

Ranma just looked at them all and wondered if she should be like them and join in. But she just didn't get what was so funny. It didn't sound funny to her.

[][][]

"We have the technology, people!" Akiko said, waving at the cameras and the support equipment they were standing before. "Now, let's make the _Magic!_ "

"Aw, geez! Why am I doin' this again?" Ranma face was sour, and she didn't want to make it cute again. Oh, yes. It was because her girl brain couldn't resist trying to be one of the girls. Not really to _be_ a girl, but to be like her _girl_ friends.

They had her dressed like them in a little, frilly, cutesie costume with - as she was told - little girl toy-like accessories. ("Think of _Sailor Moon_ or other maho shoujo accessories!" Akiko had told them as they were making their selections.) They, then, had stood in front of a long "ballerina" mirror with a barre to get a group look at how they looked as a "singing idol group".

"How can anybody take girls who look like we do seriously?" the redhead had glowered.

"You said you don't watch TV or play video games, Ranma," Hiroshi said, wishing he could pull a camera out of nowhere. "They have those where being a singing idol _is_ heroic!"

"See!" Ranma told the born-girls. "The pervert likes girls this way!"

They even had a set to stand in front of that hadn't been changed for another one, yet. "This reminds me of our family dojo," Akane said. "Except...Christmassy."

"They've been filming for a Christmas special," Mr. Toru said. "I'll admit, it does seem early even for that. But it can be hard to reserve studio time. There are other reasons, perhaps, too."

"Mr. Ono?" an older woman said, coming into the studio. "Mr. Toru Ono?"

The everybody except Ranma, Akane and Kuno begin to whisper among themselves. "Is that _the_ Rumiko Takahashi?" , "The Princess of Manga!" , "The mangaka behind _Rumik Theatre_!" , "A celebrity!"

"Yoshimura-san!" Mr. Tofu went to greet her. Needless to say, all but three of the group were disappointed. "You're early."

"I wanted to be here early for my interview. Mind if I sit and watch these wonderful-looking teens perform?"

"No...Is that a problem for you girls? See, it's not a problem." He notices the redhead, "Almost not a problem."

"Come on, Ranma, smile!" , "Yeah, you're one of us, now!" , "Sing along with us!" , "So, you really don't know how to sing!" , "Do the best you can." , "Follow along with us!" , "Fake it, if you have to!" , "Of course, you don't know the words. That's what that TV screen prompter is for! See?" , "It's professional karaoke!" , "Okay! Okay. ...Are those words even s'pose to make sense?"

"Mr. Ono, I'm looking for something that can compete with Takahashi-sama. I may never become as famous or have as much money as she has, but I give my publisher what they want. I just need inspiration, right now.

"...Say that girl with the red hair stands out. She has a sort of...a vibe. Strange, she's so cute and yet... Let's see...my character should have...not red, but pink hair. What else do you know about her, Mr. Ono?"

"...Sayonara my heart...  
I want to feel this loneliness,  
I want you back in my arms.

" _Darling,_ just for me, can't I wait for you?..."

An Yoshimura would be correct, her manga, and the anime based on it would never come anywhere near to being as famous as any of Takahashi-san's. But it could be said the title reflected something of Ranma's curse to be a girl, _Cho Kuse ni Nariso_ , "I'll Make a Habit of It".

[][][] [][][] [][][]

In this AU, alternative universe, timelines are blurred and do not necessarily follow along with either that of the manga, anime, video game or the wider world outside of _Ranma ½_.


	14. Chapter 16 From Soup to Nuts

An unusual disclaimer: Ranma ½ is a trademark of Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ Communications, and its characters have been borrowed without permission. And Son Turned Daughter was originally written way back in 2002 by the FanFiction author Tangent, and his characters Megumi, Yasushi and Ayane have, likewise, been borrowed without permission. Please see the first two chapters of this story under his pen name. This story is written for non-commercial purposes only.

[][][] [][][] [][][]

The redhead's voice wasn't bad, not good, but not bad for somebody who had never even _tried_ to sing before. Yoshimura-san, the manga writer, had told her that with a little training she could be good enough to sing professionally. And, then, she included the others, as well. Professional broadcaster Mr. Toru had agreed, saying that their personalities combined to give them a sound all their own, especially Akane as a "Princess" and Ranma as a "Wild Child".

"Hear, that, Ran _ko_?" Akiko said as they went to change back into their own clothes after the fun. She was happier than she should be, the other girls had thought, as she had had musical training.

But Megumi understood and liked her motivation to encourage the dojo daughters. "You and Akane can be the lead vocals. Every _group_ has a singer or two who take center stage."

"Ran( _Wild_ )-ko( _Child_ ) would be a great stage name!" Ikuko laughed.

"Really?! It _did_ sound like they thought we could be stars," said Akane with stars in her eyes. It could be a way for her to become a real actress! At least a voice actress, a seiyu!

"Naw! The only trainin' I'm interested in is martial arts," Ranma said, about to lace her fingers behind her head only notice that her nipples were ready to pop out of the costume. Not that she really cared, but others seemed to. Especially - frown - guys.

"You could do both!"

"The Kuonji Second-Branch School does both Restaurant Cooking and Martial Arts Takeout," Ikuko bragged.

"Think of it as advertisement for your dojo!" Megumi said.

"The Kuonji clan does that," she continued her bragging on her family, again. "It also warns the customers to keep out of trouble in our restaurants and the First-Branch's vendors carts."

"I like that! That's just what I needed to hear!" Akane's smile had grown bigger. One of the things that had kept her from pursuing an acting career seriously was, "They say you shouldn't let your fans get too close. When they _know_ you're a serious martial artist, they won't want to." The smile became bigger still, "And I wouldn't need bodyguards! I can live more of a normal life when I'm not working!" And that was another of those things.

" "When?", "can"?" Ranma raised an eyebrow. Getting back into her lingerie had her feeling better than she had in that silly - not stupid - outfit she _had_ to wear because of her friends had dared themselves to be silly together. "Okay, Akane, I'll be your biggest fan. And I won't be close to you."

"What!? That doesn't sound like what a _friend_ should say!" Ranma's so clueless!

" _Who_ don't know how to be a friend?" Akane's so clueless! "I don't want to be famous." And she pulled the drawstring of her panty _shorts_ tight. "And you know why!"

Megumi and Akiko were not about to give up. "How many days have you been in town?" , "You're already famous in Nerima!" , "And you're becoming famous in Shibuya!" , "It's like you're destined to be famous!"

"You mean cursed," she frowned, yanking the chemise tanktop down. Her boobs just wouldn't flatten.

Akane saw how troubled Ranma looked and realized who didn't know how to be a friend. Her. "I won't become famous if you don't, Ranma."

Megumi and Akiki did _not_ like hearing that. If she and Ranma didn't become famous, _they_ probably wouldn't either.

"But, they're right. Your reputation is growing. And I don't know what to do about it, either." She ran her hand through her hair. A solution had to be found! And the only ones who had given her solutions before were, "Kasumi or Dr. Tofu might know!" Her hand came out of her hair. "Right now, there's nothing we can do about it. Let's go have dinner and wind this date down!"

"I'm for that!" Ranma said, pulling up her skirt _pants_.

[][][]

Before they left, though, they made sure they had a chance to thank Dr. Tofu's brother.

He was on his phone. He smiled at them and gestured for them to wait until the call was over. "...Yes? There is one? You'll give it permission to make the detour? That's wonderful! Yes, I know, I owe you a favor. But I'm paying off one of the many I owe to my brother."

"Then the news is affirmative?" Kuno asked.

"Please, say it isn't," Hiroshi begged.

Mr. Toru smiled for Kuno, and shook his head at Hiroshi. Then he turned to the girls. "Kuno-sama…" ("-sama!?") "...has told me of the dinner reservation that's been made. I have arranged the quickest way for you young adults to get there."

[][][]

They finally had to put tape over Hiroshi's mouth. Megumi's lipstick was on the tape. At least he got his mercy kiss.

It reminded _Juliet_ she still owed Kuno a kiss (and maybe more than that after the way he'd been spending money on them for this date). And that reminded Ranma that _she_ had - just a couple of hours ago - kissed that overly handsome, dyed-blonde, womanizer, Mikado! Grr!

"Are his hands tied?" Ranma yelled above the din of the helicopter.

"Tired!" Ikuko yelled back.

The man standing beside the open door of the utility copter yelled, "I'm asking you again! Are you sure about this?!"

"And I'm tellin' you again-" But rather than continue the argument, the little redhead jumped out of the noisy chopper.

Hiroshi continued to argue as loudly his taped mouth allowed as he fell harnessed to the back of the pigtailed girl! He was too terrified to enjoy the physical contact of her. In the one story, he nearly passed out.

He did when the redhead landed in her platform shoes.

Ranma didn't know what the kind of harness professional parachutists used to give rank amateurs a thrill was doing in a helicopter, and she really didn't care. Without it, that coward would have remained on board all the way to Chiba across Tokyo Bay. She had had to toss "her date" aboard the copter as it was.

She was just about to unbuckle the harness, when her trained senses gave her a _warning!_ She jumped! She meant to go only yards, meters, but the blasts from the chopper carried her and Hiroshi further! She was able to get a solid footing again only yards, meters, from the edge of the skyscraper. Even _she_ did not have the ability to survive that fall.

When she turned around, she saw Kuno facedown on the helipad. The idiot had insisted on showing her, and everybody else, that _he_ could do what she had just done. She didn't really care. She was almost certain his healing techniques would have him up and walking - and _talking_ \- soon.

She looked above and saw Akane (forgetting what the gale was doing to her skirt) holding on very tightly to the sides of the sling that the winch operator by the door was lowering her in. Ranma hurried over to help her, then the other two born-girls, and keep her, safely down. The winch operator had been right, this hadn't been such a great idea. Curse herself for bragging to that manga writer that she was a great martial artist and could do _any_ stunt. That had made Kuno and the others want to get into the act! After all, they were martial artists, too! Mr. Toru should probably not arranged this. His brother, Dr. Tofu, would probably not approve of this "favor".

Was Mr. Toru approving of things like this the reason the brothers hadn't talked much in years?

Well, everybody was safely down. And even Hiroshi was coming around. It was time to get him off her back. He was beginning to be a load for this little, 100 lb, 45 kg, body.

[][][]

At the door off the roof of the skyscraper, there was a man with a long, pencil-thin moustache and in a stiff-looking, black-tie tuxedo waiting to greet them. "Bonsoir, Messieurs and mesdemoiselles, I am Chance, your _maîtr'd_ for ze evening. If you would follow me," and just assumed they would.

The elevator ride wasn't long. It opened up on the fanciest restaurant Ranma had ever had the misfortune to see. She knew in an instant she didn't belong here. The others felt only less overwhelmed. All but Kuno. If anything, he felt it wasn't _grandiose_ enough for him.

It was a long walk to the window table. Theirs was a long table with none of the antique, European chairs having its back to the view. Though Hiroshi wished his were. His acrophobia wasn't helped by the 50-story, penthouse outlook. It had been a wonder he hadn't soiled himself before this. He had to leave for the _la Chambre des hommes_ , men's room. Luckily for him, the _La Belle France Cuisine de le Gourmands_ had an extensive wardrobe for those guests who did not meet the Dress Code of the restaurant.

Why Ranma and the born-girls were allowed to remain dressed as they were she put down to the fact that this Chance guy knew Kuno as a good customer. In other words, the place wasn't so snooty that it ignored the small fortune a frequent customer had spent in it over the years.

And looking at Hiroshi (Chance without the mustache), and other customers, she was _glad_ she didn't have to wear what was "appropriate". They looked way too old-fashioned and uncomfortable. And not in a Japanese way.

"There are hoop skirts over there! And petticoats, " Akane cried out in as soft a voice as she could manage. "And she has to be wearing a corset."

"How can they sit in those things?!" Ranma said, not so softly. Then, "Oh, the hoops give." They still had to have something on their laps to keep them down.

"And what's with all those poufy sleeves?" Akiko asked. "Do they actually think those are stylish?"

"Their gowns have decolletages and exposed shoulders," Ikuko said. "They're not going for a Lolita look." Styles popular among some Japanese.

"I know that style," Megumi said. "They don't have the lace and frills and little ribbons that fill every inch of Lolita fashion."

"They seem to be how the upper-class society dressed in the 19th century. Even in Japan." Akane said. When they gave her the Yeah-you're-the-expert look, she told them, "I'd like to be an actress, remember? I know something about the costumes you wear for different period plays."

"Look, those people over there are wearing more modern clothes," Akiko pointed out.

"They are the ones who had arrived properly dressed," Kuno informed them. "Those in the more exotic apparel are either those who had not or the staff of the restaurant. Though the material is of a lesser quality, it is actually quite an honor, as that is how the very upper echelon of the expatriate, _Exiles de la Belle France_ , themselves prefer to be attired. Would you ladies-in-waiting-"

"No!" all four of them said. Though Akane, the actress, was tempted.

[][][]

More than just Ranma's stomach was growling. "How long before a waiter comes?!" she complained for all of them.

"This is the finest of fine French dining venues. Every meal is prepared from, to use the prosaic term, scratch. From the cracking of the just-laid egg to the mincing of the freshest onion, every masterpiece that emerges from their _haute cuisine_ kitchen must only commence _after_ the patron has put in their request."

"And to be snobbish," Akane said, remembering the stage part.

Ranma's stomach made the loudest noise. She _had_ to get something to eat - Soon! She was being forced to go deeper into the _ki_ reservoir. And what she found in this place and these people was making it live up to the _Anything-Goes_ term for it. She was not only feeling the _Silky Darling_ , but she had the urge to _be_ a silky darling!

But she argued with herself. She could handle it! She had years of practice being self-centered and anchored in who she was when she felt the vibes of others. She could ignore what others felt! She didn't have to follow the cues on how they felt she should act.

Okay, even before Jusenkyo, echoes of those feelings had managed to leak past the cracks of her defenses, whittling away at the heart. But now, with a girl brain, it had become harder! _She_ , her, the redheaded, pigtailed girl wanted to follow the cues, do what her female friends expected of another female friend. It was an internal battle! Her defenses were trained into her! They were automatic! They were there to protect her old, male, identity. That made them now barriers to her new, female identity!

But the _Silky Darling_ played its local siren song.

Oh, why not! She had decided to stay a girl half the time so she could learn how to surf the inner impulses and turmoils that came with a girl brain. While a girl, she was always on the surfboard and would always wipeout sooner or later until she _could_ remain on her feet. And she, being _Ranma Saotome_ , wouldn't be satisfied until she could hang ten! And then dance on the board!

Besides, she had the perfect justification sitting next to her! "Oh, Kuno-sweetie, this pretty beautiful and fancy-smancy restaurant is making me forget the horrid, hard life my pop made me live trying to make me a man! And not just any man!" She could almost force out a fake tear. "A _man among men!_ "

"That beast! I had no idea pandas could be so cruel!"

Ikuko, Akiko, and Megumi looked at one another. Surely they hadn't heard that right. A panda? Hiroshi was too busy with his personal misery. He was on the other side of his redheaded date.

A trembling hand reached out for Kuno's left hand. "You are such a wonderful influence, Kuno-sweetie! The more I am with you, the more I feel like a real wom-" Nope, 'don't wanna go there! "a real girl."

Kuno looked down at the hand that, in her maidenly shyness, could not quite bring itself to touch him. His manliness was simply overwhelming her modesty!

"I do have that effect on the ladies," he said, smoothing his hair.

"Yea, yea! Thank you, again, Kuno! Thank you for this date!" And she stretched herself to kiss him on the cheek once more.

Flash!

"What?" She had been thinking she would like to have a picture of this to fling at her pop and hurt him where it hurt him the most. But who….

It was that ninja squirt, Sasuke, dressed in a _purple_ version of Chance the maitr'd, but with more buttons, these of brass. He was holding a camera.

Then he wasn't holding a camera. Chance had taken it away. "We do not allow ze paparazzi in zis dining establishment! We are _quite_ exclusive."

"It is quite acceptable, my man, Chance," Kuno informed him. "You know Sasuke is but my manservant. And he is under my orders to collect photographs to commemorate the occasion of my dates." Ikuko and Akiko cringed a little when he included them in his gaze. Megumi didn't.

"He has?" Ranma asked.

"How long has he been spying on us?!" Akane demanded to know. It was bad enough to have her life invaded by the camera of _her own sister_ , Nabiki!

"My apologies, Monsieur Kuno, but it is not acceptable to ze other guests. Some can give a severe tongue lashing. Again, my apologies. But zis offensive instrument _must be_ removed!"

"I will be able to get my camera and its film back?" Sasuke asked.

"The film shall be developed and inspected, beforehand."

Ranma's hand now _was_ on Kuno's - both of them! "Kuno! Gimme the one where I'm kissin' you! I gotta show it to Pop!"

"Of course, my aficionada. No doubt, you wish this souvenir as evidence to this Pop of yours of your undying devotion and, so, be persuaded to appreciate yours truly, as well.

"Oh, I wanna make him appreciate, alright!" Appreciate what turning his son into his daughter was doing to them _both!_

"Chance! Do as the young lady-in-waiting requests from her celebrity."

"As you desire, Monsieur Kuno," the maitr'd bowed before leaving. Sasuke, in the meantime, had just disappeared.

"Ha! Pop'll get the picture, _this_ time!" The sudden feel of Something spoiled her revenge fantasy. Kuno had just given her _another_ gift! And unlike him butting in and spending on this date with Hiroshi, this was a gift she had _freely asked for!_

Trying not to growl, Ranma leaned over to Kuno, put her warm, smooth hand to his cheek (just beginning to whisker) and...turned it so she could kiss the other cheek. Now, was _that_ good enough(!)?!

Yes. No. The feeling of Something had lessened. It recognized that this was part of her installment plan for paying back the samurai idiot. But a huge debt remained and the only way to speed up the process, it felt like, was to get it over with and _actually_ kiss him - for REAL! Just kissing him was no longer enough - She had to _mean_ it! She had to go full-girl!

NEVER! If she _ever_ became a girl, it would be of her _own_ surrender! She would not be conquered! She was the Wild Horse! Mustang, cayuse, bronco, uh, bronca! The Something _couldn't conquer her!_ If it could, it would have brainwashed her girl brain by now!f

But there was still the _Silky Darling_ calling out to her girl brain. She had female, girl and womanly deficiencies it was ready to fill. The more food she ate, the more she could resist and reject or accept them on _her_ terms. Given enough time, she _would_ \- she told herself - learn techniques to go even completely hungry and yet not given in! But as long as there were born-girls nearby she liked the feel of (their _ki_ ) and didn't mind becoming like, she _was_ in danger of being overcome! Her defenses continued to find ways to slow that process down.

[][][]

Being a simple date, Kuno had told Chance to bring the _spéciale du jour_ in three courses, not seven courses. "We must watch our figures."

"Yeah!" Hiroshi agreed.

And after the long wait, the first course finally arrived. The _entree_. Soup. Bouillabaisse, of course. The cuisine was French, but the locale was the seafood nation of Japan.

"About time!" Ranma cried, picking up the fancy china bowl, ready to slurp it all down in as close to a gulp as she could.

Flash!

The bowl was empty! And her mouth was still dry!

"Hey! I thought they took that camera away from-" Twisted around in the chair, she didn't see the runt ninja, but, taller, there was a woman in a long, dark dress. At least, Ranma assumed it was a woman (she was proof you never could tell), and raised her gaze up to a severely thin face with her round glasses providing its only curves. And above - Was that hair or a roasted turkey complete with booties at the ends of its twin drumsticks?

"Zat is not ze way we Dine at _La Belle France_!"

"You're in _Japan_ and that's the way we eat here!"

"Zis is an exclusive restaurant with diplomatic immunity! It is officially a part of France!"

"It is true, my spirited Ranma," Kuno told him.

"You _believe_ that?!" Idiot!

"Ranma, don't fight it. You can have my soup," Akane pushed hers nearby. "You've been using a lot of _ki_ , you need this more than I do."

Ranma felt sorry for her friend but knew - and more importantly, _felt_ \- she was right. She pulled the bowl of fish soup in front of her. She fought the urge to slurp it down. It was pretty easy. It was more a guy rather than a girl thing to do, even in Japan. Or at least in _this_ place. The _Silky Darling_ told her so. She picked up a spoon. What a waste of silver.

Flash! Just before its bottom touched the broth, the soup was instantly gone, again!

"What'd I do wrong(!)?!"

"As vulgar as it is to use tableware, it is ze height of _grossièreté_ to use ze tablespoon with soup!"

"How'm I s'pose to know what kinda spoon is what kinda spoon(!)?! I lived my whole life before now without spoons or forks!"

"Ze patrons of establishments such as zis are expected to know."

"Do you know?" Akane asked the others. The others didn't know.

"Is this it?" Megumi held up the one that wasn't a tablespoon and was more oval.

"Oui. Ze mademoiselle has made ze correct guess." (And it had been.)

"See, Kuno? I'm a natural," Megumi said. "I belong in places like this."

The others picked up their soup spoons.

Then Ranma. "Can I have more soup?"

" _Non!_ _Impossible!_ Only one course per patron is allowed _here!_ It would mean the chef would have to dispose of all that he has prepared for your entire meal and commence once more from _entree_ to _fromage!_ "

"That's unfair!"

"Those are the rules of _la Belle France!_ "

"Madame St. Paul," Kuno said, "I am sure that you can make an exception for-"

Flash! And _he_ had no soup in his bowl, either.

"No, you are correct, Madame St. Paul. Accept my apology."

"Wow, did you hear how fast Kuno crumbled?" Akiko whispered to Ikuko.

"She must really be a big shot for- What the!"

Ranma had suddenly scrambled on top of the table with her platform shoes and was holding their bowls high and away from this Madame St. Paul! "You leave their soup out of this! This is between you and me!"

"Shoes on the table!? That alone is barbaric, but to be standing in them - beyond barbarity!"

"Do barbarians wear shoes?" Hiroshi asked.

Flash!

" _Hey!_ Now _my_ soup is gone!"

"That's it, Old Woman!"

"Old Woman!?" she cried out at the insult.

"Yeah! "Old Woman" 'cuz you remind me of my "Old Man"! _He_ steals food, too! I challenge you!"

"No, my perfect in visage, Venus! I implore you not to engage in this battle!" Kuno had grabbed her by her ankles.

"Ze challenge has been made and cannot be withdrawn without the consent of ze person challenged. And zis I will not! And as ze one challenged in zis duel, it is _I_ who may choose ze terms! And I choose-"

Kuno was on his feet, ready to interfere. Forgetting to let go of an ankle. "No, Madame St-"

Flash! Flash! Flash! His head was whipped this way and that.

And when it was over, his face was covered with welts.

"I deserved that tongue lashing," the once proud samurai said as he slumped to the floor, defeated.

"Man! I never thought I'd see Kuno like that," Ranma said. She had been able to stand on one foot on the table without losing one drop of the soups.

"Me, neither," Akane said. "It almost makes him...human."

"Monsieur Kuno is, indeed, quite human," Madame St. Paul informed them. "He is supremely human in his needs. His appetite has been so refined and purified that none but _la haute cuisine par excellence_ of ze Chardin franchises could possibly satisfy it."

"It is, unfortunately, true," Kuno hung his head. "Once you have tasted pate de foie gras, you can never return to fugu."

"He's like an addict," Akane said, changing her opinion of him once more.

Madame St. Paul turned once more to the red-haired, _déclasse_ girl. Becoming yet even _more_ dignified and rigid, she said, "I, Madame St. Paul, accept your challenge under the Rules of ze Martial Art of ze Fine Dining."

"Martial art of whatsis?" Ranma said. First Martial Arts Figure Skating, and now -No! Before that, at school, during the _War of the Sexes_ , she had come across dozens of examples of anything-goes fighting her Old Man sensei had managed to ignore or be ignorant of! And before even that - not counting the sports-as-martial-arts hentai horde because, in the end, she did not consider them really original - before even that, there was what she had seen Dr. Tofu use on her Old Man, and win! Ever since she came to Nerima - Ever since Jusenkyo, in fact(!), but more in this town than anywhere else - she had come across more examples of the diversity of martial arts than she had in the entire _ten years_ of her life of training to inherit the _Anything-Goes_ School! The Cursed Training Ground just May be-

"Did you say this is an _eatin' contest(!)?!_ " she hoped! All other thoughts were forgotten.

"Ze Martial Art of ze Fine Dining is _not_ about anything as _vulgar_ as eating. It is about removing the vulgarities of ze necessities of life and replacing them with ze elegance of etiquette! Only ze most _crème de crème_ of society is capable of achieving its pinnacle."

"Okay…. Is this an eatin' contest or not?"

"There is commestibles involved. Only the freshest and most-" Kuno was quieted by the baguette Akane had stuffed in his mouth.

"Yes, Ranma. There'll be food."

"Yippee! Then let the contest begin!" she cried, jumping down from on top of the table, still holding the two soup bowls.

Flash! Flash! And the bowls were empty.

"You were about to spill the bouillabaisse on the Aubusson carpet."

"That's great for Ranma, but are _we_ going to get something to eat?" Akiko asked.

[][][]

Ranma was in a dressing room off of the _toilettes des femmes_ and in just her panty shorts.

"Why do I gotta dress in the same kind of stupid clothes as those other stupid-lookin' people are wearin' out there(!)?!" And, looking at Madame St. Paul, in here.

"Because it is part of ze Rules of ze Martial Art of ze Fine Dining, of course, you coarse, peasant girl."

"Gee, thanks. First Kodachi, now you."

"You will lose the challenge unless you agree to ze Rules. You, obviously, are incapable of _being_ elegant but you shall, at least, _look_ the role. I refuse to engage in battle with someone who will not at least maintain appearances."

"Oh, I get it. It's not how you feel, but how you look." and she looked what the chambermaids had selected for her to wear. "I don't think I'm gonna feel _or_ look marvelous." As they encased her in a steel, hourglass segment of armor, she _knew_ she wouldn't.

"Hold onto that barre in front of the mirror." This was the second time that day Ranma had stood in front of a "ballerina", room-length mirror with a railing. Suddenly that silly "mahou shoujo" costume didn't seem bad. This one screamed bad!

Madame St. Paul put her knee against Ranma's tailbone and pushed as she pulled at the chain ties that closed the armor tighter and tighter around her figure. "Too tight!"

"That is ze point of ze corset, _stupide_ , uneducated girl! Ze men could never achieve ze constriction of ze female corset! It is ze very emblem of femininity."

"Yeah, like you got femininity!" Ranma knew femininity. She was surrounded by it, not just with her friends, but at school and at the Tendos. _They_ had the femininity her girl brain was attracted to. But _This_ woman had nothing she could, would, or should accept from her _ki_ reservoir. There was nothing _Silky Darling_ about her!

And that welding mask didn't help.

-Welding mask!?

[][][]

A squadron of chambermaids passed the redhead as left the petites filles' chamber. They had brooms, mops, hammers, and dremels. The dressing room _had been_ soundproof.

But ahead of her, Madame St. Paul still had the key to the iron corset. At least she hadn't been welded or riveted inside the freaking iron corset! Just locked in.

Ranma reentered the main salon of the restaurant wearing a hoop frame beneath petticoats and pink, silk dress with large bows going around it at mid-shin level. And she had short but puffy sleeves. Her neckline reminded her of the French maid uniform. (What was with the French showing the tops of their boobs!? This St. Paul didn't! Though, remembering her trip to the women's side of the public bath, there were probably two saggy good reasons the Old Woman didn't.)

And then there was the corsage of red roses with thorns.

Akane and her other girl friends came over and tried to make her feel better. "This dress is just the kind of period piece costume I was telling you about earlier! It's very authentic." , "Feel it! It's organy, isn't it?" , "Style comes and goes. This one could make a comeback because of _you_ , Ranma!" , "Eh! If there can be Lolita Goth, why not."

Ranma pulled up so they (and other patrons) could see not only her petticoats, the hoops, the pantaloons, but also that, "They made me wear these high heels."

"Uh…." Ikuko looked at Aiko. "Uh…." Who looked at Akane. "Wow. Talk about authentic."

"There're point-toe shoes and then there are those," Megumi crinkled her nose.

[][][]

Most of the patrons of the restaurant were now gathered around the Madame St. Paul and the pigtailed, red-haired mademoiselle.

A small table had been placed in the center of the restaurant and was set with the _plat principal_ , the main course. _La spéciale du jour_ was _poulet Marengo_ (chicken, eggs, and crayfish sauteed in olive oil, garlic, and tomatoes), lemony roasted potatoes and carrots, and buttery cauliflower puree. To hungry Ranma, this all looked...stupid. Her life on the road had taught her to stomach anything and everything edible, spurred on not just by her hunger but by her need to control the _ki_ reserve. Eating this would be no problem. But it made as much sense to her as having to eat with a fork and spoon.

And thinking of them, "Where _are_ the spoon and fork you say I _gotta_ use?"

Highly indignant, Madame St. Paul answered, "In ze Martial Art of ze Fine Dining, we do not use anything as vulgar as utensils. Those are for ze _nouveau Riche suivant_ our class."

"I think she said they're for those who became rich _after_ her ancestors became rich," Akane said.

"Correct. We are the legitimate heirs of the French Revolution. All else are upstarts."

"Wow. Talk about twisted snobbery," Akiko said.

"You mean think they're the 'nobility' that came _after_ the executed nobility which makes them better than the 'nobility' that came after _them?_ " Megumi asked. She looked at Kuno. He _was_ authentic Japanese nobility, and, yet, he thought of these people as genuine French nobles. Oh, well. He was an idiot, but he was a handsome and rich idiot.

Kuno may have actually understood what people were thinking, for he explained, "After the Revolution, the chefs of the nobility were bereft of patrons on which to practice their art. It was _they_ who originated the very first restaurants. They brought elite eating to the great unwashed! So, they are _indeed_ the true and rightful successors of the French line of succession _as well as_ Exemplars of the democracy of the Revolution!" Yep, perfect Kuno logic.

Ranma was not impressed. "I don't know when this French Revolution was, but the oldest eatin' place in China that never went out of business began in 1153. I been there."

"Ah, but it is _Chinese_. Like to the designations of their wines, only the French have the legitimate claim to the designation _restaurant,_ a _French_ word." Don't try to be logical with a Kuno.

And Ranma decided not to try. "Okay, St. Paul, what _are_ the rules to this martial art of yours?!" She needed to get its game sense to adapt _her_ abilities around it.

"They are quite simple. It is the _technique_ that is difficult - _Non_ , close to impossible!"

"Really? Now I really _am_ interested!" she said with a gleam in her blue eyes. "If there's one thing I'm _best_ at is learnin' impossible techniques!" All her trained sense were on alert, ready to mirror what her opponent did and return it better! There were _no_ actions she could not duplicate!

"Then, this is how we know the winner: There is only one serving on ze table. Ze first one to consume ze serving wins ze challenge."

" ' sounds simple enough. And perfect for my eatin' abilities," Ranma smirked.

"Zis is not about Eating!" she had finally lost her patience and was raising her voice. "Ze Martial Art of ze Fine Dining is about ze elegance of proper etiquette! What separates it from ze vulgar animal needs and enshrines it as an Art is this: None may see your mouth open."

"What!? Nobody's s'pose to see me open my mouth?"

"Observe my mouth. Chance."

"Oui, Madame St. Paul," said the maitr'd. And he began tossing _hors d'oeuvre_ after _hors d'oeuvre_ at his superior.

They all disappeared an inch from her face! And her mouth remained a thin line.

" _Bon! Merce_ , Chance. A proper meal may begin with either ze _hors d'oeuvre_ or ze _entree_. I can now begin ze _repas de compétition_."

Ranma blinked. Before she realized, "Hey! What about _me!_ I didn't get any and I didn't get any soup, too!"

"You have demonstrated you are more than just a mere vulgarian. What does a barbarian gamin need with observing the proper courses of dining?"

"Madame," Kuno interjected. "Perhaps as a practice?"

The Madame looked stern and unbending. But she, at last, said, "Chance."

"Oui, Madame St. Paul."

Crab Toast, Smoked Trout Blinis, Grape Focaccia. They were all caught by Ranma and stuffed into her wide-open mouth! But those were all.

Flash! Flash! Flash!

"Wha!? How?!" Ranma was standing at the other side of the table, a yard, a meter, away from the woman, and _yet_ she managed to take all her food away! She was better at it than _her pop!_

"Are you prepared to concede?" the Madame asked.

"Never! Bring it on!"

"Zen Chance will act as ze referee. Chance?"

"Oui. Ze barbarian with ze rouge hair loses."

"WHAT!? Unfair! Unfair!" Ranma was about to go into a tantrum. "Those finger foods were just for warmup!"

"Zat is not ze reason you have lost. You did not observe ze proper etiquette of duels. What is ze name of your opponent?"

"St. Paul! Okay - _Madame_ St. Paul! There I said it proper like!"

"And what is your name?"

Ranma's fists banged on the edge of the table as she almost fell to her knees. "You're right. I shoulda introduced myself." She, then, looked up at the man in a glare. "But that's a lousy way to win a challenge! If I do the formalities...the etiquette, can I compete?"

"Oui. I will allow," Madame St. Paul relented. But only because she knew the girl was severely outmatched. And she would not let this gamin be anonymous in her ignominious defeat. How more humiliating that all should know her identity.

The redhead drew herself up, standing with as much poise as she could. She bowed Japanese-style. Then, surprising herself, she curtsied. Using her best girl Japanese, she said, "My name is Ranma Saotome of the _Anything-Goes_ School of Martial Arts."

Chance started. He went to Madame St. Paul and whispered something in her ear.

She, too, started. She silently challenged him. He silently answered by pulling a folded piece of paper from the inside pocket of his jacket. The largest of the elegantly calligraphed words read, _candidats potentiels_. She nodded

Chance, at last, spoke to Ranma. "Do you know a Genma Saotome?"

Ranma scowled. It wasn't something she was proud to admit, but, "He's my pop. Father."

"The contest is postponed!" Madame St. Paul announced.

"What(!)?!"

"Why, Madame St. Paul?" Kuno asked.

"I shall not allow ze public humiliation of ze _fiancée_ of Monsieur Picolet Chardin III." And her glasses gleamed as she fixed a wicked stare on the bride candidate, "Yet."


	15. Chapter 17 A Date with Destinies

An unusual disclaimer: Ranma ½ is a trademark of Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ Communications, and its characters have been borrowed without permission. And Son Turned Daughter was originally written way back in 2002 by the FanFiction author Tangent, and his characters Megumi, Yasushi and Ayane have, likewise, been borrowed without permission. Please see the first two chapters of this story under his pen name. This story is written for non-commercial purposes only.

[][][] [][][] [][][]

"Yet? Postpone?! Fian-FIANCÈE!? Who are you callin a fiancèe?!"

"Yes, WHO?! I'm Ran-" Akane barely caught herself in time. She _wasn't_ Ranma fiancèe. The agreement was Ranma had a year before she-HE!-was supposed to choose between her or one of her sisters. But, after THE kiss at noon, and then THAT afternoon kiss - and all the love-sick ogling all the women at the store! Grr! - maybe they didn't _have to_ wait a year! Maybe she and "Romeo! _Romeo_ is her fiance!" WHAT?! What did you just say, Akane!?

" _Romeo and Ranma!?_ " her friends and Hiroshi cried out in surprise.

"Never!" Kuno cried out in outrage! This is the man who had claimed Akane's first kiss! This is the man who others claimed had bested him - in front of a gathering of the entire school! This is the man who Ranma's own panda forbid her to be even seen with! "Romeo Saotome can _never_ be wed to Ranma! It is forbidden!"

"I don't even know who _this_ nut thinks I'm engaged to, and now I'm…." Romeo is me. Saying she was engaged to herself was like saying she _didn't_ have to - wouldn't - be engaged! "That's right! It's me and Romeo!"

"But you said yourself," or was it vigorous Akane, "your Pop did not approve of him!"

"Oh, he approves of _him_ , it's-" This is getting too complicated! How can she continue to tell the truth but not all of the truth?!

"Uh, uh…." Akane, what did you start! She was supposed to _help_ your friend! But she _had_ to do something - She was in danger of _losing_ her friend. Not only could she lose her Romeo, Ranma could end up kissing somebody like Mikado - _for real!_ "There's more than just her dad!"

"My mom? I ain't seen her for ten years," and she sure wished she did. No, wait, what would she do if she saw her like this. She was supposed to be a Man! _A man among men!_

"So, zis is a prearranged engagement, too, _non?_ " Madame St. Paul said. "Until it can be demonstrated differently, _our_ claim has ze priority! Our _contrat d'engagement_ was signed by her _père_ , father, Genma Saotome, before Ranma was born, nearly twenty years ago!"

"No freakin' good, stinkin' Old Man," said behind the teeth she was grinding.

"No!" Ikuko demanded to be heard. "A woman's voice _is_ important! The two branches of the Kuonji clan separated over more than just how they serve food! It was about their attitude towards men and women! And if any woman has a right to be heard on who her daughter - a woman! - is to be forced to marry, it is her _mother_!"

"You are ze cook?" the Madame chose to recognize her existence.

"I am a _chef!_ In training. But I can still make the best okonomiyaki _you_ ever had!"

"I never had zis food item," her nose twitched into a sneer. "It is not _French_."

"No, it isn't. It's _Japanese_ and proud of it. And I'll match okonomiyaki against anything you have in _this_ place!" And it was her turn to sneer.

"An eatin' contest! A _real_ eating contest!" Ranma asked for. She needed - desperately! - food! She was feeling the _Silky Darling_. Not from St. Paul, but from Akane and all the other women in the restaurant. There was something about engagements that stirred very womanly feelings in them! They were threatening to contaminate her!

"This is ze _French restaurant_ ," the Madame said indignantly. "We only serve ze _French_ _repas_.

"Still…." urged Chance, the maitr'd.

"Still," the Madame sighed. But instead of saying her true reason, she said, "As a professional courtesy, and in recognition that I, too, am a woman as well as a nanny, I will allow! Chance, you will make ze arrangements on contacting ze _mère_ , mother, of Ranma Saotome."

"Oui, Madame St. Paul," he bowed, French fashion.

"My mom!?" Ranma's face broke out into a grin. Then her face just broke. _My mom!_

[][][]

The pigtailed girl didn't want to meet her "fiance" but was nearly overwhelmed by the desire of her friends (and the expectations of the women in the restaurant). She might have been able to resist if St. Paul hadn't agreed to let her friends join her in meeting him.

They all rode an elevator (the two hoop skirts added to the crowding) to the penthouse above the penthouse restaurant. There was a lobby before the main double door.

Ranma turned for the elevator! "At least let me put on my _own_ clothes! Or at least those I got at the shop!"

"Non! Zis is what ze bride of ze _Exiles de la Belle France_ _à Présent_ _Gauche_ wears! It marks their status as part of the _crème de la créme_ of society. And _none_ would think that of you without the attire."

"That's because I _don't_ belong! And I'll _stay_ not belongin'!"

"Oui, I agree zat you do not belong. _But_ you have ze basic qualities one of our brides must possess. And those qualities are so rare, I have no choice but to consider you _une_ _fiancèe_ of Monsieur Picolet Chardin III."

" "Une"?" Akane struggled with her memory of the Molière play she had studied for (and wasn't _that_ a 'comedy of errors' of how she lost the part!). "There can be more than _one_ fiancee?"

"Oui. Ze first qualification is zat she must be Japanese."

(The first qualification is she must be female, Akane thought.)

"Japanese?!" Kuno was surprised. "You would dilute the purity of your noble, though foreign, lineage by interbreeding with those not of your kind?!"

"Of _nécessité_. We have seen ze dangers of inbreeding." Madame St. Paul was looking directly at Kuno when she said that. "And, _deux_ , to _remain_ in exile, we need some claim to Japanese citizenship. Becoming a citizen is relatively easy, but it requires we give up our claim to being _French_. Zis we will not!

"However, zose of ze Japanese Diet are enraptured with ze French diet we provide. Zis is ze extraordinary service required by zeir law. For political reasons, however, ze will not provide ze exception we require without demonstrating our _intent_ on becoming Japanese. _So(!)_ , ze marriage to _une citoyen Japonais_ with _un enfant japonais_."

"Money talks," Megumi said. "But not loud enough," Akiko said. "It sounds like, Stomachs talk," Hiroshi said. "Gurgle-growl!" Ranma's said.

"Ah, I understand," Kuno said. "That is the reason why the son of the internationally famous thief, Arsen Lupin, married a Japanese woman." This was Kuno logic, again.

"I'd like to meet Fujiko Mine!" Hiroshi said.

"How can a thief be internationally famous and not be caught or killed?" Akiko asked.

"Especially, since Lupin III also steals from other international criminals?" Ikuko asked.

"Hey, I just realized! _I_ could be his fiancee! Mrs. Picolet Chardin III!" Megumi said.

" _Non!_ You do not meet ze most important criterion!" the Madame said. "Ze bride _must_ demonstrate ze signs of being able to accomplish to ze acceptable degree ze Martial Art of ze Fine Dining!"

" _I_ can do that! I'm a martial artist!"

"Let her take my place!" Ranma told her.

" _Non!_ Her battle aura potential is ze weakest among zis group! Ze only possible alternative bride candidate is ze _jeune femme_ with ze long hair."

"ME?!" Akane didn't know whether to be flattered or not. Not if it meant having to marry a strange boy! But, still, if it could save Ranma, could she….

" ' sounds to me like all you have to do is say, no, you don't _want to_ learn their martial art, Ranma," Hiroshi said.

Ranma _did_ struggle. The strain to say it was written on her face. She should...she would…. She couldn't. For ten long years - the most impressionable years of her life, her childhood - her no-good, stoop-to-any-trick Old Man sensei had conditioned her to _have to_ learn _any_ anything-goes technique! As long as there was a good enough excuse.

And the excuse justifying _this_ one was, "Ranma will not say _non_. She _will_ train to learn ze skills of ze Fine Dining. If she fails, she will _definitively_ lose ze challenge to _moi_ ," Madame St. Paul said. And said correctly.

She moved to Ranma and tugged here and pushed there on the 18th-century-style gown she had ze _petite roux_ in. When she was done, she stepped back and inspected. "Presentable." Then she frowned behind her glasses. "Except for ze hair. Ze _tresser_ , pigtail-"

"The pigtail STAYS! Touch my pigtail and I _will_ walk away! Challenge or no challenge! Betrothal contract of no contract!"

" _Bonne!_ Ze pigtails remain as ze notarial stamp of your recognition zat you are ze _fiancèe_ of Picolet Chardin III." She turned to the double door and used the door knocker once. "Chance!"

But it wasn't the maitr'd Chance who answered.

Ranma felt it! The jump in pulse rates, the rise in body heats, the increase of body humidities, shortness of breaths - the actual _spiking_ of battle aura potentials! Megumi's, Akiko's, Ikuko's, and, maybe, even Akane's, arousals threatened to overwhelm her in _their_ female responses! The _Silky Darling_ was a storm against her the dike of her weakened defenses! And because she was hungry, _another_ hunger was leaking into her awareness.

" _Bonsoir, mesdemoiselles et messieurs! Entrer-vous_ , Please, come inside my fourth home away from home!" said the tall, blonde and handsome _man_. He was dressed in a white tuxedo more stylish than Kuno's and one that suited his physique far better. "I am your host, Picolet Chardin III."

 _This_ was her fiance? He was _hers?_

Ranma came to her senses and screamed! She made a mad dash back to the elevator and pushed at the button over and over again. When it came to slow, she shoved her fingers between its doors and was pulling them open, when-

"So, _mon roux_ , you must be Ranma, my _fiancèe_. Chance has told me too little about you. Come, let us become acquainted," he said, having placed his hand lightly on her shoulder.

Don't melt! Don't melt! Stay tense!

She fought against the _Silky Darling_. And it wasn't just her own masculine defenses that were helping her accomplish this, it was the jealousy her girl friends felt towards her, now.

But she was led back and through the door of her "fiance". It wasn't the _Silky Darling_ pulling her marionette strings. It was the Something! There was a betrothal contract she had to honor. She and the Tendo sisters had negotiated their way around theirs. But that left her open to _this_ obligation! And _if_ this contract was _older_ than the one between her pop and Mr. Tendo, _it_ was the one she had to honor above the one she just _might_ want! She saw no way out.

Except one, the Tendo Solution. "You, you really don't want to marry me, right?"

"I want to want to marry you. As I said, let us become acquainted," the charming man said, leading her by her hand to a chaise lounge surrounded by lesser chairs. He almost disappeared from Ranma's sight, when she sat and the front of her hoop skirt rose up in front of her, showing everything beneath.

When she pushed it down onto her lap, she found him, chuckling. "I apologize, Ranma. In the circles I travel, the ladies are used to skirts such as you are wearing. I shall be only amused at seeing you become as they, I assure you."

"I don't _want_ to become like anybody but myself." Wait! Why was she talking girl Japanese(!)?!

"Oh, a challenge?"

"No! I won't accept _that_ challenge!" But doesn't a Saotome _always_ accepted a challenge? Yeah: A _martial arts_ challenge! And - Please! - she didn't want to hear there was one for sitting in hoop skirts and acting like a lady!

"The challenge is for mine, _mon fiancé_ Ranma. I am dedicating myself to making you a lady of elegance and grace. You, my fair lady, shall be my _Pygmalion_."

"Picolet! You have never behaved this way before!" Madame St. Paul said astonished, and disapprovingly.

Some of the façade fell away, His hand was on the back of his neck and he said, apologetically, "I am 20-years old, and I do not want to wait until I'm 30 for my honeymoon, _voyage de noces_." Ranma thought she could wait! And even longer! "And shouldn't I _be_ the ladies' man you say I have to portray, Nounou?" Ranma felt the womanly impulses diminish as her girl friends' opinion of him diminished. All but Megumi's. "Chance shall advise me. Isn't that so, Chance?"

"If zat is your desire, Master," said Chance with tongs and a platter, looking away from Kuno. Without his aim, his toss became sloppy. But Kuno still managed to snap up the hors d'oeuvre. Everybody could see his mouth open and close. So much _not_ the Martial Art of Fine Dining.

"Fat chance, Chance! I ain't gonna be nobody's lady!" Whew! Now she was back to talking guy.

"Unless that nobody is I, Tatewaki Kuno!" Something did not sound correct about that. Oh, this Ham Steeped in Virgin Olive Oil Croquette was superb!

Chance produced a deck of cards, "High-Low? Twenty-One? Euchre?" And a pair of dice, "Baccarat, Dice Chess, Bunco?" Then like a magician, he produced other instruments for casino gambling. _Including_ a roulette wheel!

Ranma felt something stirring in her she had (mostly) avoided feeling since she was a boy and still knew Okonomiyaki Ucchan. She tried to shake it off. " _Why_ would I want to gamble(!)?"

"How do we know you won't _cheat!_ " Akane cried.

"My name wouldn't be _Chance_ if I cheated. I am an honest manservant."

"Why would I want to gamble(!)?" Ranma repeated!

"Uh, the challenge?" Hiroshi asked. If there was a way _he_ could…

"If you win, your iron corset will be unlocked."

"What!? _Really?!_ Wait! You been plannin' to leave me in this(!)?!"

"It is a necessary part of _la Belle France_ School of Martial Art of ze Fine Dining," Madame St. Paul said. On the count of three, _un deux trois_ : Three clangs! Hers, Chance's, and Picolet's. They all wore steel corsets under their clothes. - How disappointing! No wonder Picolet was a fine figure of a man. Ranma's girl friend's opinion of him sank even lower.

[][][]

Thanks to Ikuko, Ranma was back on platform shoes and in her denim-colored culottes and blouse. She carried (awkwardly) the iron corset under her short arm.

"An _au revoir_ kiss?" The blonde asked.

Ranma wasn't even tempted! Her girl friends had been with her as she had changed, and they made it clear they no longer had much of an urge for the boy. All except Megumi. "I'm still on a date! I haven't kissed _him_ yet!" Oh, _gee_ , that actually felt like the girl-right thing to say! So _Silky Darling._

"You _are_ going to kiss me?!" Hiroshi smiled.

"Don't push it, man." No promises. No promises. Nothing the Something could use against her! Man! She had a tag team against her!

" _Adieu_ , then, until we meet again. Tomorrow, I am told. Chance says there is no schooling for you on Sundays."

[][][]

Instead of hoop skirts, only the iron corset made the elevator smaller for the party of seven plus Chance.

"I shall inquire about saving you from this loveless marriage," Kuno said. "Chance, can you give me an estimate on how much it would cost to purchase the betrothal contract?"

"I ain't something that can be bought and sold!"

It was a long 51-story trip for Kuno. At ground level, it was ladies first - actually, Ramma - out of the elevator and then Hiroshi. And then Chance, pulling the stomped-on swordsman out. His white tuxedo was no longer white and had the dark imprints of more than just the platform shoes Ranma and Akane were wearing. All except Megumi's, of course.

"Kuno'll be okay in a little while," Hiroshi told Chance. "Things like this happen to him all the time."

"I know," Chance said. "He's a regular at the restaurant."

"Look at this. Another restaurant," Megumi said.

"It's not as fancy as the one upstairs," Akiko said.

"It is how we dispose of our leftovers," Chance said, as he gestured for two bouncers to carry Kuno out of the building. "It also provides our _chef de cuisine_ his opportunity to experiment."

"St. Madelon!? The Mad Chef of Montmartre?!" Suddenly Kuno was on his feet and (almost) fully recovered. "I remember his chocolate-covered Swiss Cheese wedge stuffed with ants!"

"Yuck!" Ranma said. She had been known to eat just about anything, but _that_...

"Chef St. Madelon does have a penchant for chocolate in his dishes," Chance informed them. "But this lower restaurant does provide more prosaic viands."

Ranma's stomach rumbled. And hers was not the only one.

Hiroshi said, "Kuno's paying." And so they all followed him into the restaurant.

[][][]

Sitting at a table of the _Seine Inférieure_ , "Inferior Sane", Ranma got her chance to practice her martial art of fine dining moves. Plate after plate was delivered and, less than a minute later, each was emptied to be taken away and replaced with the next.

"I can still see you open your mouth, Ranma," Akane told her. Megumi and Ikuko agreed. Akiko wouldn't. "Do I have to look? It's gross! Like her table manners."

"Oh, man! I never want to date Ranma when _I_ have to pay for her meal!" Hiroshi said. Hadn't he also said the same thing when he saw her eating at the lingerie and dresses shop?

"This date has been an education for you, then," Kuno said. "Pass on that acquired wisdom to your compatriots at Furinkan. None but the wealthiest is worthy of dating Ranma Saotome."

"I don't even think my brother could sell enough okonomiyaki to make up for what _she_ would eat!" Ikuko said.

*Groan* "There goes our family budget," Akane said. "We hardly bring in enough to pay the bills as it is."

"Master Kuno has underwritten most of your loans. Surely, your sister Nabiki Tendo has told you this?" Sasuke the ninja said.

"No! She hasn't!"

"Oh, my! I _was_ told to keep it a secret. Forgive me," he bowed.

"Suddenly, I lost my appetite," Ranma said. The Something was there, confirming what the ninja runt had said. Its only good news was it was Akane and the Tendos that were indebted to Kuno's gift. Her debt was through the Tendos who could _only_ give her gifts because Kuno had given _them_ gifts. But the way her debts to him were adding up, her curse _might_ arrange so Kuno _was_ able to buy her contract from the Chardins!

And the evidence of her and the born-girls (except Megumi) disapproval of treating women as investments was going away. "Here, Master Kuno. I have brought you your kendo-gi."

[][][]

Well, the exposed part of his chest of his usual costume did allow them to see some of the stomp-prints. But those, too, would be healed and gone too soon.

"Monsieur Picolet has, in his graciousness, has provided a means to your homes," Chance said. "And ze romantic one, very fitting for ze close of ze date."

"Are you implying what I think you are, Chance?!" Kuno asked, excited.

"Oui! Observe!" And up to the formal entrance of the skyscraper lit for the night came a carriage pulled by a team of four horses.

"Nerima's only a few miles away, but isn't it going to take more than an hour to get there this way?" Hiroshi asked.

"Non! Ze driver, Aron," the old man tipped his top hat, "is quite experienced in the _passages_ and _sentiers_ of all of ze Chardin maisons and franchises. Of course, if you should _desire_ to extend ze experience, ze long course can be traveled."

"Nope! Not me!" Ranma said, hopping in before Kuno could offer to help her in. The other girls preferred to get in by themselves, as well. Except for Megumi.

Ranma was reminded of how her curse worked when it began to rain on Kuno and Hiroshi. She _hadn't_ gotten wet once on this date, had she. Of course, she hadn't, she frowned. She had stayed a girl all this time! she reminded herself. (The melting ice of the skating rink didn't count. For some reason, there was cold water and then there was _too_ cold water. Water near the freezing point didn't have any effect on her body or his body. Magic didn't have to make sense.)

[][][]

The iron corset secured to the baggage area on top of the carriage, Aron was ready to get the horses to move.

Those inside still were not ready. There was room inside of only six people to sit, three to the benches on each side of the carriage. There were seven people.

"Ranma can sit on my lap," Hiroshi offered.

"Do you want me to tie your hands and tape your lips, again!?"

"And you'll sit on my lap?!" he asked.

"If the Venus of the Sunrise is to sit on anybody's lap, it shall be mine!" Kuno said, reminding him who had the wooden sword. "A gentleman should _stand_ in the presence of a lady."

"You're the only gentleman here," Hiroshi said, not being sarcastic. Kuno thought differently.

Hiroshi rose.

Hiroshi fell back onto his seat, pulled down by Akiko. "I don't want his "manhood" at my eye level!" And the other girls turned their stern gaze on Kuno. Except for Megumi.

"Oh, Akane can sit on my lap. -What?! What did I say wrong?" Ranma asked.

"Ranma," Akane said with a low, embarrassed growl. "Remember your reputation." And she blushed to remember it was _thei_ _r_ reputation.

After a few more minutes, Aron was finally able to get his team to move. It was Ranma that was standing. Hiroshi had the view of her frontside. But Kuno didn't mind his view of her backside. The girls, Ranma included, put up with the two boys' ogling. Except Megumi. She wanted them to ogle _her_!

[][][]

"How _greater_ will our next date be, Ranma, my Morning Star! -Oof!" Kuno had his wind knocked out of him by Akane's elbow to his gut,

"Don't call a girl that. It can have a perverted interpretation!"

"Oh, Akane, my Evening Star -Oof!"

" _That_ , too!"

"As I was saying," Kuno went on more carefully, now, "When, on our next date, it is just I and you-"

"Don't forget about Sasuke," Ranma said.

"You called?" Sasuke asked, bring his face down so he could look through the window from his spot on the rocking carriage roof.

"I have no need for you!" Kuno dismissed him.

"That's what you always say," the hurt ninja said, drawing his face up and away.

" _As I was saying_ -"

There was a flash of lightning, but it was only the thunder that had Akane actually cling to the Blue Thunder.

"Oh, my Evening Star _does_ have a weakness," Kuno smiled, hugging her to him.

"Kuno, take your-" Flash! Boom! And she hid her face in-

Ranma's bosom. "I've always been afraid of thunder!"

"Oh, Akane. It's just big noise." But Ranma held her friend.

Another rock of the carriage and Ranma was sitting on Akane's lap. Akane didn't want to let go of her.

"Wow. This beats the _arm-stretch_ as a way to get to touch a girl," Hiroshi said. "Only guys aren't supposed to show they're afraid."

"Akane, _listen_! You've got to learn to overcome your fears!" Nice words, Cat Fist Fraidy Cat, the Girl Afraid of Water and Shampoo! But she didn't like seeing her friend like this! She had to find a way to help so she could handle thunder and lightning even when she wasn't around. "You just have to look straight at it and tell yourself-"

The flash was brighter than even the street lamp! Then she heard the thunder.

Then she _saw_ the Thunder! "Burin-chan!" It _had_ to be Tunde Burin; what other little, black pig had a yellow bandana around its neck!?

"Ranma(!?)" Akane was confused. First, she was holding onto her comforting friend. Then she wasn't after the martial artist had used pressure points so gently she hadn't even been aware she had been using them on her.

Ranma opened the door and jumped out. Her platforms splashing through the puddles, she reached the pig in no time and picked it up by its bandana.

"Bwee!? BWEE! Bwee?!" Whoever had it had come up from its blind side. Even then, it should have been able to sense its danger, if only it hadn't been feeling so miserable.

"Don'tyou worry, Burin-chan! I got you! You're comin' home with me, where you'll be dry and safe!"

"Bwee-EE!?" It recognized its rescuer! And it was totally confused. It was torn between biting and licking. It growled with a whine. It snorted with a sigh.

Ranma remembered it had bitten her earlier, and she was cautious with this wild animal. She held it out in front of her and when she got to the door of the carriage, she tossed it in.

"Burin-chan!" the girls cried in recognition.

But it was Akane who caught it. And held it. Tight! It was just like the plush, toy animals she used to use to comfort herself as a little girl when the outside world thundered at her. It was cold and wet, though.

As Kuno, sitting next to her, insisted on reminding her.

Ranma lifted the bokken away as she came back into the carriage. "I'm cold and wet, too."

"Excuse me! Let me warm you with-" Kuno came _too_ close to molesting her. But his arms were pinned to the back of the carriage seat by the flat of his own wooden sword.

Ranma came too close to molesting _him_. Her knee was on the edge of his seat, between his legs. "Oh, Kuno-sweetie. I just couldn't let _you_ get wet because I was a naughty girl and went outside in the rain." Kuno was confused by the mixed signals.

Even _More_ confused was Burin-chan.

"Oo! I know, if you! If you went out in the rain, you would be wet, too! And that's the way I like to think of you: _All wet_."

[][][]

Kuno didn't get _all_ wet. She dripped on him and Burin-chan got Akane wet who passed it on to him and Megumi. (She had the _worst_ luck in seating arrangements!) Ranma _was_ tempted to throw him out into the rain and let him walk back to wherever his home was. But the Something warned her not to.

On a hunch, she opened the door and reached up. It almost got away from her! But hanging half out the door and stretching, she pulled it back in!

There was the little ninja kneeling on the floor in front of her, trying not to whimper.

"Are you afraid of thunder, too?"

"Of course, not!" A ninja wasn't afraid of anything! A ninja was ready to lay down his life! "Y, yes," this ninja admitted. This ninja was a lot like her. She understood this guy.

"Oh, Kuno-sweetie, you're going to let this darling man stay inside with us, please, please, please?"

[][][]

It was wasn't until Sasuke told them they were near the Kuno estate that Ranma kicked "Kuno-sweetie" out into the thunderstorm. (That's where a _Blue Thunder_ belongs, anyway.) For the ninja, she merely held him out and dropped him into a puddle.

"Finally! A seat!" And she plopped down on it. Ack! She could still feel Kuno's body hear. From his butt.

"Megumi is next," Akane said while she petting the drying (and smelly) Burin-chan. "Then Akiko. Ikuko is last before it's our turn."

"What about Hiroshi?"

Ranma was gentler kicking him out than she had been with Kuno. Hiroshi really didn't live that close to Megumi. But they belonged together. Now, if he were just handsome and rich, she was ready to make the pervert's fantasies come true.

[][][]

The rain had ended.

"The date's finally over with!" Ranma sighed with relief as she watched the horses take the carriage away.

"This was our first date, too," Akane said.

"A First Date is important like a First Kiss?" Ranma frowned.

She shook her head and smiled. "Then this wasn't our First Date. It's like the kiss I gave you this morning. That was _both_ of our First Kisses."

Akane teared up. "Oh, _Romeo!_ You said just the right thing!" And she leaned against her.

Seeing she was holding the little pig, it was Ranma alone who got to hug her. By the shoulder. As they walked through the Tendo gate.

In her other arm, she carried the iron corset.

[][][]

Before they could say, Tadaima! Kasumi was saying, "Okaerinasai."

Nabiki was next to greet them, "You _Owe_ me, Saotome! Do you have _any_ idea how much money you cost _us_ , this family?! You're freeloading-"

" _Akane!_ My youngest daughter has returned to me!" her dad cried rushing to her with open arms.

"Dad," Akane dodged. "I'm too old for that." She was glad she had the pig in front of her.

"Where's _my_ pop?!" Ranma demanded.

"Uh, well, that is…." his friend hesitated.

"I was worried that he might try to interfere with your date, Little Sister. So I asked Dr. Tofu if he could find extra work for Uncle Genma to do."

Ranma blinked. Tried to laugh. But couldn't. It would have been more satisfying if _she_ were the one dislocating a few bones and discovering what new shiatsu pressure-point combinations could do.

"He'll get overtime for working on a Saturday, Saotome!" Nabiki told her. "Which is more than I can say for you!"

"Shove it, Nabiki!" And she thrust the iron corset hard into her hands. "I'm taking a hot soak! I'm cold and tired and need to relax!" She ignored that it was very unlikely she _could_ relax, once she had her guy brain back.

"Will you take Burin-chan with you, Ranma?" Akane said, holding out the pig.

Ranma accepted the task of cleaning it. But her eyes rose to Akane's. "I'm sorry, Akane."

"Yes, well, no need. There's, uh, other ways for me to get warm."

She was suddenly pushed! Who?! Kasumi giggled. "Little Sister has already seen you nude, Little Sister."

"But, but, Ranma was a girl! _Is_ a girl, then!" Akane lived up to the meaning of her name. She turned red in embarrassment.

"That's right! Kasumi is right!" their father said, waving a rooting fan, white with one red circle. "I give my permission and blessing!"

"No, Mr. Tendo. Kasumi. Akane is right. When I see Akane with no clothes on, I see her with my girl brain. And that's the way my guy brain wants to see her. At least until after our First Date." Oh, _gee_ , Again(!) that actually felt like the girl-right thing to say! Would she still feel that when she _was_ a guy?!

Akane came up to her. Lowered her head and...kissed her on a cheek. No, she wasn't ready to be bisexual, yet.

Ranma blushed modestly. "Kasumi, see that Akane has what she needs. Me and...B-chan," she and Akane shared a smile, "are going for a shower and a soak."

[][][]

Again, Burin-chan was confused! "Bwee. bwee," it tried to protest. It _knew_ it was going to see a naked _girl_ body. It _knew_ it was going to have yet another nosebleed. It had already lost too much blood. It was dipping too much into the _ki_ reservoir. It had been absorbing the kind of _ki_ pigs' needed. It was finding itself more and more like a pig!

Maybe _that_ would help protect it from the damage it got from seeing a naked girl body. Maybe knowing the secret behind _this_ naked girl body would protect it. Maybe what would protect it was the possibility of kind thoughts for the girl that had rescued it. Not once, but two times in one day.

No! "Bwee! Bwee!" She was its enemy! There was no doubt about it! As sure as it was a pig, _she_ was its enemy! The one responsible for _all_ of his misery! Revenge is the only thing it had to live for! After that…. "Bwee," it wept. It was a pig. It knew what happened to pigs.

[][][]

Ranma was ready for when the seemingly tamed animal would become wild again. She turned its bandana around so, first, its front legs were trapped under it, then, a pull and a tie, its right hind leg was bound by it. Only its left back leg was any kind of a threat, but not much, as long as she remained aware of it. And the same went for its teeth. She just had to keep them away from her.

Okay, it wasn't the greatest of tactics. Its left _front_ leg was ready to come out from beneath the bandana. Was there something in the laundry basket that might help? ...What was this elastic thing? Oh, that's right, Akane called hers a garter. Okay, Burin-chan, you have a "-chan", so you're going to wear girl clothes, _too!_ Pull it tight. Twist and tie the slack. And, ta-da! Bound pig.

The pig protested, but it was no use. It was just too small and helpless against a human. Even a girl.

She left it on top of the dryer as she undressed. "Man, I finally can get out of these girl clothes."

Burin closed its eyes and turned its head away. It must not use its imagination! It must not remember what it saw at the ice rink that afternoon. It must not think like a _pig_.

"Okay, little piggy! Let's get clean." Ranma was so confident she had it under control, she carried it under her arm, in the curve of her nude, hourglass figure.

Burin felt its blood pressure rising. It thanked the kami it was insulated from most of her effects by its covering of fur.

Ranma sat on the plastic shower stool, placing the animal down on the tiled floor between her legs. One hand reached for the shower wand, the other the tap. "C,cold! Sorry, Burin-chan, you're going to have to wash with cold water, too." And she sprayed. No longer on the tap, that hand found the soap. "First, I'm going to wash your back." And she got a good lather all over that part of it.

After she had, she did the same with her front, from shoulders to ankles and every point between. "Man. I'm still not used to having a smooth and soft, squishy body. It's weird! I'm glad my guy brain only feels my girl brain memory of it." Even, then, she had to rely on his warrior's chastity training to keep from getting any jollies. She was sure that would lead to things she didn't want to think about.

Even so, she didn't stay long on her boobs and rock-hard nipples. Or a place lower.

"Time to wash the lather off these sides of us, Burin-chan."

After that, she turned the pig onto its back. And for the first time, Burin found itself looking up looking up at the totally naked girl body! And it was full frontal! With boobs dangling and jiggling over it. Only the edge of the shower stool kept it from seeing everything!

It squeezed its eyes closed. It didn't have to have a nosebleed. It didn't have to have a nosebleed. It-

Ranma was about to get the lather between the weave of its bandana when she noticed something _not_ covered by it. "Why you naughty pig! There's no doubt you're a guy!"

[][][] [][][] [][][]

The answer to a review:

Nope, I had no intention of going there. This reflects the nude scene in the manga/anime where Ranma discovered the true identity of P-chan/Burin-chan. _My_ version better reflects its/his later character development. If you've gotten this far in my story, have faith and read on to Chapter 18. This is about as graphic as I intend to get. I'm keeping the T-rating.


	16. Chapter 18 Ryoga Is No Pet

An unusual disclaimer: Ranma ½ is a trademark of Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ Communications, and its characters have been borrowed without permission. And Son Turned Daughter was originally written way back in 2002 by the FanFiction author Tangent, and his characters Megumi, Yasushi and Ayane have, likewise, been borrowed without permission. Please see the first two chapters of this story under his pen name. This story is written for non-commercial purposes only.

[][][] [][][] [][][]

It _didn't_ get a nosebleed! The humiliation - and at the hand of its enemy! - was too much for Burin! It kicked out with its free left hind leg!

"Ow!" Ranma cried, releasing her loose hold on the beast.

The pig propelled itself backward and bounced off the tiled wall by the shower fixture. It landed on the floor, scrambled first with its left hind leg then with its freed left foreleg and found the purchase to jump into the furo hot tub!

Splash! SWOOSH! Out rose an intensely angry guy! (Wearing a garter around his right arm.)

"How Dare you! How Dare you, Ranma Saotome!"

"Wait! I met you, today, right(!)?! You been to those cursed spring, _too!?_ "

"And how Dare you pretend you don't know me! I'm _Ryoga Hibiki!_ "

" _Ryoga_ , that's it! Sorry you fell in Spring of Drowned Pig."

"I was cursed because I followed _you!_ You coward!"

"COWARD!? Who're you callin'' a coward!?" Ranma was on her feet, ready to fight!

"YOU! You ran away from a challenge!"

"I _never_ run away from a challenge! I wouldn't be in danger of bein' a _bride_ if I did!"

"A bride?" Confusion sidetracked his anger. "Like wearing a wedding kimono and wig and sipping rice wine?"

"Worse! A Western-style wedding dress in the fanciest wedding a rich guy can afford!"

"A _guy!?_ You're going to marry a _guy?!_ " His voice rose in protest, "But _you're_ a guy!"

"That's why it's a _danger!_ " The angst was written on her cute face.

Until she realized, "You _know_ I'm a guy?"

"I _said_ I followed you! Ever since junior high school I've been on your trail, Ranma Saotome! Unlike you, I'M a man of honor! I don't run away like a girl!"

"Don't you go insulting girls! I get enough of that crap from My Old Man!" She could take him! She knew how he fought, both as a guy _and_ a pig! "And none of them are _stupid_ enough to chase me for a year-"

"Three years! I've been hunting for you for _three years!_ "

"Man, talk about stupid. Why'dyou want and go and do a stupid thing like that(!)?!

"Because you stole my bread!"

"Bread? Bread?! You wasted three years of your life because you say I stole your bread!? Stupid doesn't even _begin_ to say what you are!"

"A challenge is a challenge - and _you_ didn't fight me!"

"You're serious. Okay, I'll fight you. But not here. I'm a guest here - And you are, too! Akane says the Tendos don't got much money, and Nabiki says I _cost_ them a lot, today."

"You'll run out on our fight, again!" But Ryoga did recognize he was a guest. And it _would_ be wonderful not to sleep outside homeless for at least _one_ night.

"I _never_ run, man." the little redhead came up to him and lifted her chest as up close to his as she could.(Oh, and there was a little matter of where his manhood was. But she didn't think of that at all.)

Ryoga actually backed up as far as the tub allowed.

Ranma stepped into the hot tub herself. "Why do you think I'd run out on a fight?" Ryoga made room for her. She sat down, splashing herself until she became himself again.

"You didn't show up at the vacant lot where our fight was _supposed_ to be! You didn't wait for me!"

"Wait?! I had to _wait!?_ Wait! Now, I know who you are! You're the kid that wanted to spar with me just 'cuz I was the best martial artist he knew. We used bread as our challenge. We worked ourselves up to the final showdown. And it _was_ in a vacant lot near your house. I waited _three days_ for you to show up. Even though it went against the Rules of Fighting."

"Three days - But _I was_ there on the fourth…. The Rules of Fighting?"

"Geez! Even if you are a martial artist that's had no sensei, I expected you to know the Rules! When a showdown time is set, there's always a time limit. And the guy that doesn't show up on time forfeits."

"Forfeits?" Ryoga sank into the hot tub. It was true. Without belonging to any formal school of martial arts, he didn't know the details of how to be a martial artist. He had thought all he had to be was stronger than the other guy. (And it had made him angry when Ranma had shown that wasn't enough.) But this sounded...right. "I lost? I lost three years ago? I trudged around the world and back, went to that cursed place where I lost my humanity, and...I had already lost?"

"Naw! I said I waited. The only reason I couldn't stay was 'cuz my pop decided _we_ had to go back on our training travelin'. ' something about school fees not bein' paid, I think. Whatever. I'm ready to finish our fight." He rested his head against the wall-side of the tub and stretched out, finding room for his legs next to Ryoga. "But I'm makin' no showdown time, yet." He looked at the morose guy who hung his head over the knees he hugged. "Maybe we don't need no showdown time. We'll leave it open."

"Tha...thanks," those were hard words for Ryoga Hibiki, especially as he was saying it to, "Ranma." He admitted, "I get lost easily."

"Poor guy." But he knew not to show another guy pity.

It'd been a long time, too long, since he had had a _real_ conversation with anybody. His loneliness wouldn't let him pass up this opportunity. "It's hereditary, I think. I haven't seen my folks in three years, maybe before that, too. - But I do see my dog often. Her name is Shirokuro, or is it Checkers?

"Anyway, it wasn't until I started fighting you…" or was it, really, sparring, practice matches that helped both of them improve their martial arts skills? "I think my problem with diretions began one of the times you kicked me in the head."

He became angry again, "You kicked me in the head!"

"And you don't think the same thing hasn't happened to me? Worse? I'm a _real_ martial artist, not a dojo one or a competition one. I thought I told you that back in junior high?"

"Well, _that_ was when I was too young…," his anger headed inward, "and stupid to understand."

"Yeah. I guess I was too young and stupid, too." That was as close to an apology as Ranma felt a guy should give to another guy. "Man, this hot soak was just what I needed after the day I had. It's really made me ready for bed.."

"Lucky you."

"Hey, man, I'm askin' you to sleep with me."

Ryoga lifted his head. He looked at the very male looking face. "You're not going to turn into a girl, are you?"

"Why would I wanna do _that!?_ You like turnin' into a pig?" The hallway door was opened by a panda. "Okay, I do have a reason to turn into a girl!"

He leaped out of the hot tub and sprayed herself from the shower wand that had been left going. Thinking of the water bill, the nude girl turned the tap off, before saying to the panda, "Look, Pop! We just took a cold shower together and now we're going to sleep together!"

"I'm _not_ going to sleep with you! You're a _guy!_ "

"Oh, silly! We're not going to _do_ anything! Not much, anyway *Giggle*. After all, I _am_ engaged to be married! Just think, I'll soon be the wife of _Picolet Chardin_ , whatever his number is."

[No son of mine is going to be the wife of anybody!] read the panda's sign.

"Oh? Do you want me to be a concubine?" Ranma-chan said all 'sweet and innocent'.

[No son of mine is going be the] [concubine of…] That next sign had been broken over the animal's thick head.

"Ryoga?" Ranma asked. _She_ had wanted to do it!

"A panda at the Springs tried to _eat_ me!" the nude and dripping man said.

Ranma picked up the [No son of mine is going to be the wife of anybody!] sign and gave it to Ryoga. "Hit it with this one, too."

Ryoga grabbed it. And waved at it her, "I should hit _you_ over the head! Maybe you'd become like me and keep getting lost! It'd be karma for kneeing me into the Drowned Pig water!"

"I did that to you, too? Ooh…." There was the Something telling her she owed Ryoga a great debt. But how was _she_ supposed to know what would happen when she did those things? The answer was, It didn't matter to the Something. It followed the well-known MacGuffin that, _You are responsible for life for the life you ruin_. They wouldn't be dojng the things they do if you hadn't.

But why be a hero, then?! Instead of helping, you might be hurting! Would that make her responsible for saving Furinkan from the _Battle of the Sexes(!)?!_ The Something wasn't answering. Nobody from Furinkan was here right now. Ryoga was. Ranma had the feeling that being a hero was complicated. Like being a girl was complicated. _Why did her life have to be complicated!?_

"I want you to have a place to stay even more, Ryoga." The bare girl's leg went up against the bulk of the panda, keeping its claws from reaching the nude guy. "I'm kickin' you out of the bedroom! Sleep with your Tendo friend, or in the dojo, for all I care!"

And just as it shifted its attack onto her, she used its superior weight to push herself to be off and running! She ducked its claws as it passed under its raised foreleg, yanked on Ryoga, getting him, too, to go under it, and then dragged the guy out the bath room, the utility room, down the hall, and around the corner to the next hall. The panda in hot, snarling, pursuit!

"I don't run! Let me go! Let me fight!" Ryoga protested.

"You'll fight! This is a retreat! It's, You _choose of the battleground!_ "

When she came to the still open shoji doors - did the Tendos _ever_ close them? - she flung nude and wet Ryoga out into the cold night air.

She, then, leaped over the charging panda and kicked _it_ outside after Ryoga.

"Hey, Pop! Beat Ryoga, and I won't sleep with him!" And, of course, that's just what the idiot did - _both_ of them. "That'll keep him from gettin' lost.

"Now, I need to find something me and him can wear."

"That's not a problem," Kasumi said from behind her. "For Little Sister, at least. For Little Brother and his friend, that is another matter."

[][][]

Opening the door to the formal living room across from the kitchen, Ranma saw boxes after piled boxes, all with the name of the store where she had gotten this afternoon her blouse, culottes, chemise tanktop, and boxer-like panties. She didn't have to guess why the boxes were here, "Kuno."

"Yes," Kasumi smiled in sympathy. "Nabiki wants to return or sell them to raise the money she says you owe her. Something about, "Magic miracles ruining Vulcan logic"?"

"I ruined her bettin' by kissin' Akane!"

"Oh, my! That's wonderful!" Then her smiled faded. "Oh, my! You weren't Little Sister, then?"

"No. I was Romeo."

" _Romeo?_ _Romeo and Juliet_ is Akane's favorite play! It's one of the greatest romances!"

"I didn't _do_ it to be romantic! I did it to save everybody at school!" And her voice lowered. "And to save my male pride."

"Does Akane know that?"

"Uh…. I guess not. Man! She's not gonna like hearin' I didn't do it mainly for her."

"Then don't tell her."

"But that wouldn't be honest!"

"Little Sister, ever since I've known you, you've been very honest and truthful. But you haven't always told the _whole_ truth, have you?"

[][][]

In his silk tanktop and panty shorts, Ranma strode out into the Tendo yard, where the two were still fighting. Only, this time the panda was fighting a little, black pig. In the battle of strength, it was entirely one-sided. But in speed, the smaller animal had the edge. " _Tunde Burin_ " got some good chomps on its black-and-white opponent even as he watched. Obviously, the panda's more powerful jaws had not snacked down on the pig. They were so engaged in their battle, Ranma was able to walk up to them unnoticed.

Setting down the teakettle, the brunette waited for his opportunity. And found it. He placed the iron corset where the panda could - and did! - step into it.

He then yanked the chain tight around its thick right thigh! It was too thick to shut the thigh in, but it _did_ help to keep it off balance. Keeping _both ends_ of the chains in his good hand, Ranma picked up the teakettle and poured hot water over his, now, Old Man.

 _That's_ when he tied the chain around his pop's thigh and knee. "I wish you weren't so fat! I _want_ to cinch you in it like _I_ was!"

"I'm not fat," Genma told him. Which was, technically, true. But he didn't have a six-pack.

Ranma used the chain to fling him to the ground. Continuing to pull on it, he also pressed his foot down on the pudgy belly. He had his no-good sensei under control, for now. "You're gonna to tell me about signin' me over in a betrothal contract before I was even born!"

"Oh, yes. One of those contracts." Somehow, his glasses caught a gleam and-

"I wouldn't make any moves if I were you," nude and steaming Ryoga said. "I have you covered, Ranma."

"Thanks. -Now, about that contract, Old Man!"

Ryoga's foot was by his hand. Genma was in no position to attack. He surrendered. "Which betrothal contract are we talking about?

"You don't mean you signed _more 'n one!?_ "

"No, I don't want to go out in the cold night air! I wish to stay hiding under my covers!" Mr. Tendo sobbed.

"Oh, Father," Kasumi said. But it hadn't been _her_ that had forced him out of the house.

"This is about arranged marriages! _You_ know about those, don't you, Dad!" Akane yelled. "If Ranma has to marry Chardin, then she can't - I mean, HE can't marry one of us!" Her mallet had made a comeback.

"Chardin?" Genma asked himself. Somewhere in his memories, he knew the name.

"Chardin!" Soun cried, quicker to recognize the name. "That eating contest! All the food we had would have been free if only we had won it!"

"Oh, _that_ betrothal contract," Genma said.

"We were starving! If we had, you, our children, would not have been born! It happened nearly twenty years ago."

"It sounds as if I would have been born if you had, Father," Kasumi said.

"You're right, Tendo. It was right after that that we decided to have our own betrothal contract."

" _After!?_ " Akane and Ranma screamed. That made the Chardin contract older and more legitimate! Only by getting out of _that_ contract could he and her (or one of her sisters) be married with honor. At the mere thought, Ranma pulled the chain even tighter.

Crre-ack. The iron corset was developing a crack! Ranma had to suddenly let go of the chain!

"Oh, my! It seems to have become rusted by tonight's rain," Kasumi noticed.

"It _is_ an antique," Soun said. "And probably made before the methods for industrial steel was perfected."

"I'm glad Nabiki went to bed," Akane said. "What if we have to pay for breaking it?!"

"Give it to me," Kasumi volunteered. "Maybe I can find a way to make it look like new...or, rather, an antique again."

[][][]

"I don't _want_ to wear these silk underthings!" Ryoga protested, still, even though he _was_ already in a chemise tanktop and boxer-like panties. "They remind me of women's underthings!"

"That's because they are," Ranma told him, dressed the same as him and the same gender as him. "And how do you know what girls wear under their clothes?"

"I, I get around. Remember I said I've been around the world and back. I have!"

" ' been in backyards and seen a lot of clothes' dryin' poles, have you?"

"When I get lost, I get lost." It wasn't something he would admit to many. Not that he knew many. Or even some.

"Look, man, if I can do it, you can, too!" It wasn't something he was proud of doin', though.

"But you're a girl!" Ryoga saw the look Ranma gave him. And then the view. "Half the time."

"I wish it were half the time," he said rather glumly. "My no-good, rotten pop - You met him - registered me at school as a girl. Everybody there thinks I'm a girl."

"Why'd you agree to that!?"

"Bein' a girl's complicated. The Doc told me so. I have to be a girl or be attacked by girl emotions and impulses. The more I'm a girl, the more I can train myself to _not_ give into them! Then I can be a girl on _my own_ terms."

Ranma sat down on his futon, the one nearest the door. "Problem is when I'm a girl I don't got no guy brain. My girl brain has be wantin'...to be _with_ girls, _as_ a girl. I don't want to _be_ a girl, just _one of_ them. ...Do you understand?"

"No!" But Ryoga's frown did not last. "But it's better than being a pig. There's a lot of things scary and depressing about being one." He sat down on the other futon mattress. "But terrible things have happened to me even before I came to...What did you say the name of that place is?

"Jusenkyo."

"Right. Jusenkyo. But there's nothing like losing your humanity as a pig. I have, uh..." Then he found the perfect words to describe it, "emotions and impulses I don't have when I'm me."

He suddenly shifted to supporting himself with his arms extended behind him. His face developed a wistful smile. "You know, there were a few people who didn't ignore me, chase me, or try to eat me. They wanted me! It was a pet, but at least they wanted me. It wasn't half bad being a pet pig." Then he frowned again. "But then I'd got lost, again. No more Old Mr. and Mrs. Ogata. Good-by Grandma Kin. So long, Shiro, or is it Soichiro? The young widow changed the name of the dog after her husband died."

"It does sound like you have an idea about what I'm talkin' about." Ranma took the same pose beside the guy. "You're not gonna like me sayin' this, but you make bein' cursed to be a girl not seem so bad. You got it worse, cursed to be a pig."

"Yeah. A little pig, at that. If we could trade curses, I would."

"And I wouldn't." Ranma yawned. "It's way past time for sleep! Here, give me your bandana."

"My bandana?" But he did take it off.

"Hey! You got another one under that one!"

"And another under this one. And more, too, probably. Don't ask me why, but ever since I got cursed, I always have one on my head. Or my pig neck." His swing towards depression ended, when his ambition to be a true martial artist rose. "I can even make them as hard and sharp as a steel weapon!"

"Magic," Ranma said like a curse word.

"Yeah," Ryoga agreed.

Then he followed Ranma tying the bandana to his own wrist. Ranma explained, "I'm gonna tie us together. Then you can't get lost."

"Y, you'd do that for me?" Ryoga almost teared.

"Sure, man. You'd do me a favor, right? Oh, that's right! I _do_ want you to do me a favor. Tomorrow. Before my trainin' in martial arts fine dining, I want you to help me get my _own_ game sense of it."

" "Game sense"?"

"Oh, you haven't had a martial arts sensei, have you? Hey, I could be yours. I'm trainin' Akane, you can be my next student. The Tendos _do_ have a dojo."

Ryoga choked. He nodded. Then finally found the voice to say, "I'll do my best."

"I know you will, man. Now, let's get some sleep. It's late and we're gonna have to be up early. I got a feelin' it's gonna be another _long day_ , tomorrow."

[][][]

Ryoga hit Ranma. Ranma hit Ryoga. Ryoa bit Ranma. Ranma tossed Ryoga. Ryoga walked on Ranma. Ranma squashed Ryoga. ...And on it went, off and on, throughout the night. Each fought their separate dream battles, but the moves became real-life ones that had the other on the receiving end. And the only time they woke up was to shuffle clear down to the other side of the house to go to the toilet. Together, as they remained bound by the bandana.

[][][]

The large, white, Samoyed dog had adopted him as a pig. But the dog was too much of a coward to protect it from other dogs. He had several battles of survival against those. But, even so, the dog was friendly and happy to see it. Even its owner, Mrs. Otonashi, accepted it as the pet of her pet. Then it had lost them when she moved to manage a rooming house. Maybe it was called _Maison Ikkuko_ or something like that.

Then there was the rich couple in their _mansion_. They had wanted to treat it as if it were a baby. Not good for his manly pride, but at least comforting. When they gave him a hot bath, he had to fight their servants and bodyguards to escape.

But his favorite "owner" was Grandma Kin. Mrs. Ono was also a widow. She had the weird habit of carrying around the shrine to her dead husband, but she was very kind and considerate towards it. It had protected her more than once from vandals and those who would steal the antique shrine to sell! Those had made it so furious thinking anybody would desecrate a shrine it had the adrenaline to defeat three at once!

And then there was the ice rink...

[][][]

Ranma was in lingerie - _real ones_ : a bra and Kasumi-type panties! - up on the platform where _everybody in school_ could see him! _He has no manly pride! None at all! Why doesn't he just become a girl!_

Akane in her _Juliet_ costume swept him up in her arms. They kiss.

And he shrinks into the ponytailed girl. He cries at the loss of his manly pride.

 _How cute! How cute! Lolita is just like little Azusa now!_

The little ninja tells her he knows somebody who can break the spell. _It's not Kuno, is it(!)?_ she cries on the edge of hysterics.

Kodachi appears on the platform in _her_ , much sexier, lingerie. _Kiss me, and become a_ real _man! All women will envy me!_

 _Non! You are my bride, Ranma Chardin III! You have no right to kiss none but_ moi!

 _We shall have a duel, then! The winner gets Romeo!_

 _I'll broadcast it!_ Mr. Toru announces it to the world.

 _I desire only a Ranma!_

 _The broadcast will be labeled,_ Not Suitable for Children,

 _We have the solution!_ The Date Management Club says. _Ranma can be the bride,_ Akiko says. _And Romeo can be the groom_ , says Ikuko.

 _I shall make Romeo the eunuch over my harem!_ Kuno says. _Ranma shall be MY concubine!_

Little, black, pig Ryoga rescues her! Her hero!

 _...Sayonara my heart...  
I want to feel this loneliness,  
I want you back in my arms._

"Darling _, just for me, can't I wait for you?..._

[][][]

Ranma was suddenly jolted awake! Her arm was raised and tossed about, with her knees being dragged first this way and then her calves sliding that way. And Ryoga was screaming something.

"You promised! You promised you wouldn't become a girl!"

Ranma looked down at her chemise-covered bust. Again she felt her butt, seeming all the plumper because of her narrow waist. "Man! Get a grip! I wanna be the girl as much as you want to be the pig. Somebody did this to me!"

"It was Nabiki," Akane said on the other side of the closed door. "It _had_ to be! Kasumi warned me Nabiki is acting extra greedy!"

"See, Ryoga?" the little redhead said, fully standing, now.

"Why would she do a thing like that?!" There was still panic in his voice.

"Uh…. Akane?"

"Blackmail. Honestly, you two are too honest for your own good!"

"Blackmail?" Then Ranma smiled. "How much will it cost me for her show them to Chardin?"

"What about _me!?_ What about _my_ reputation?!"

"Have you ever been in one place long enough to _have_ a reputation?" Ranma scratched the back of her head. "Come to think of it, neither have I." Other than being a show-off jock-jerk who only knows martial arts. But with enough luck, Ranma Saotome would stay in one place, _this place_ , Nerima and the Tendo home, for at least a year...and, maybe, many more. It was better to be a girl than the kind of guy she had been. And it was better to be a girl than a pig.

[][][]

The three of them were out by the koi pond of the Tendo yard.

"Okay, students, are you ready for your martial arts sparring?" Ranma-sensei asked. He was back to being himself. But he was still wearing the silk tanktop and panty shorts. But, then, so was Ryoga. Akane? She wore her yellow canvas do-gi.

"I don't fight girls," Ryoga insisted. "Gentlemen shouldn't fight girls."

"Then you're askin' Akane to beat the crap outta you."

"I'm _not like that!_ I only fight when justified! When I see something wrong!"

"You see nothin' wrong with Ryoga refusin' to fight you?"

"He, he's being a gentleman,"

"Thanks, Akane."

"I remember you tryin' to beat the crap outta me when we first met when I refused to fight you."

"You were a, a girl, then. Girls can fight girls."

"Can girls fight little, black pigs?"

"Of course not! That's animal cruelty!"

"Then you'd be surprised how cruel people can be to animals," Ryoga mumbled, full of bad memories.

Ranma laced both hands behind his head. "Then you two don't want to be my students. You don't need a sensei."

They sputtered protests, looked at one another, then bowed their heads, unable to think of what to do next.

Ranma walked back and forth in front of them as if inspecting his troops.

He turned his back on them and said, "A sensei has to set an example."

With that, she jumped into the koi pond. Splash!

Out came the red-haired girl. She attacked Ryoga!

Ryoga returned the attack - And in full! Off or on were basically his only two settings. He hadn't developed much of any kind of settings in-between. Finesse was something he hadn't even dreamed of having.

His sensei showed how much use his most powerful blows were: She took them and rolled with them. When she let one connect with her so she was sent flying, she just tumbled and was back on her feet to take some more! She could have continued until he ran out of stamina, but she had _more_ to teach him in this lesson.

She did what she had done the first time she met Akane in the dojo match. She read his moves - _too_ easily - and dodged, ducked, jumped his fists as well as skip over his leg much sooner than she had with Akane. "Akane and me have an idea about Jusenkyo, Ryoga! It _is_ a trainin' ground! It _can_ prepare you to be a better martial artist! The curse ain't in _what_ you become, but what you have to _face_ in your different body!"

"Stand still!" His frustration was making him even more dangerous, but, too, more careless and unfocused.

" _You_ became the _opposite_ of your trainin' style! You got _no strength_ as a little pig!"

"You're telling me!?"

"A martial artist has to use their _game sense!_ You have to use what you _got_ as a pig, just as I gotta use what I got as a girl!"

"Right! And just _W_ _hat_ have I got as a pig!?"

" _Speed!"_ And _Suddenly_ she was on the attack! Blow after blow after blow landed on, first, one spot inches away from vital and then another and another. And when she wasn't using her fists, she was using her feet, kicking him time and again, low, high and in the middle!

Ryoga was on the defense. Pride kept him from curling, but his hands, arms, feet, and legs moved seconds after the small girl had made her damage point! She did it so rapidly, and he responded so reactively, he set himself up for the _coup de gras_!

He was off balance, she wasn't! Her foot swung around in a wide arc and struck him above a kidney! He flew!

SPLASH!

"Bwee! BWEE!" Burin squealed with outrage, flying out of the water at top speed.

"There! That's what I was talkin' about!" Ranma-sensei smiled and went back to accepting hits.

It would get a hoof hit in or even two as it ricocheted off her opponent, hit the ground and leap back at her to kick its little feet against some other spot. It wasn't focused, though. It didn't care if it was getting near a vital spot or not! It was just satisfied to - finally - be doing the hitting!

But it wasn't doing any real damage. If this were a real fight, it would be counted as the loser.

"Ranma, what about _me?!_ " Akane demanded.

"No, not _now_ , Akane! I think I'm gettin' the _game sense_ of how I can win the Martial Arts Fine Dining Challenge! -Ryoga! More speed!"

Ryoga did!

But it wasn't good enough for Ranma! She bent over it, so it had less distance to hurl itself. She walked it back until they got near enough to the tree. She shoved it against the tree, only a foot away, and it was practically in her face every time it shoved itself back at her!

 _Still_ not good enough for her!

Chomp!

"Hey! Why'dyou bite my nose!" She grabbed it and yelled at it. "Don'tcha know not to touch a woman's face! It's more important than her boobs!"

"It is?" Akane asked. Come to think of it… Ranma did care more about what girls thought of her than guys. -Did, did that mean, Ranma's girl brain was...bisexual(!)?!

"I oughta…." But she stopped herself from slamming Ryoga to the ground. He had anger issues. And what happened to him as a pig didn't help.

Instead, she held him in the crook of her arm (next to her boob) and thought. Speed...speed...speed… What could she do to increase her speed?

"Breakfast is ready!" Kasumi announced.

[][][]

" _I_ didn't get _any_ practice in!" Akane was _still_ upset.

"I explained, Akane!" the redhead said, still in her lingerie, "I got to think of a way to win the challenge and _STOP_ bein' a bride candidate!"

"And how are you going to do that, Saotome?" the still upset Nabiki asked. "From what I've been told, if you can win the challenge from this woman who's an expert at Fine Dining, she will definitely want you to be her pet student's wife." And she found harsh amusement in adding, "And then you can be the mother of their large family of big, baby eaters!"

Ranma shuddered at this thought. But it didn't shake her confidence. "All I gotta do is win by NOT using the techniques of their school! I'm settin' myself up as a _rival_ school!"

Nabiki blinked. "That just might work."

"But, Ranma, if, I mean, when you _do_ develop different techniques, won't they want you even more!" Akane said, concerned for her friend, _now_. "You'll become _their_ sensei!"

Ranma smiled and shook her head. "Naw! It won't happen. You saw how much tradition means to them! Geez! They're even wearin' uncomfortable clothes that are centuries old! They insist everybody eat with the right spoon! They have a long list of etiquette rules and don'ts that must be followed or get you punished! No freakin' way are they gonna want to learn techniques that go against their tradition!"

"As much as I hate to say it, I think Ranma's right," Nabiki said. She sighed, "So much for getting a commission for investing for the economically elite and using them to network further up the financial ladder." Feeling half-defeated (She never admitted total defeated), she tossed her photo onto the table in front of her. It was one of the redhead and Ryoga in the middle of a nightmare battle but it _could_ be interpreted by dirty minds as something else.

"At least I still have Kuno-baby," she smiled.

"I passed your no account father of yours, Ranma. He was fighting another man," Ryoga said, coming in from his trip to the furo hot tub.

"Daddy's actually fighting?" Nabiki said. Would the surprises never end?!

"Remember, it's Uncle Genma," Kasumi said. "They were sparring partners in their martial arts student days."

"They're being very quiet about it," Akane said, suspicious.

"I heard something about a doctor," Ryoga said.

"Yeah!" Ranma smiled. "Talk about techniques! When the Doc came and got Pop, yesterday-" Ranma stopped.

Ranma blinked. Akane wondered why Ranma was blinking. She looked at Ryoga. She blinked.

"Oh, my," Kasumi said. "I don't remember having any laundry like that."

Ryoga was wearing very rough, but touch and durable clothes that were basically yellow and dark brown.

Seeing where everybody (but Nabiki) was staring, he wondered if his usual traveling clothes had an embarrassing tear or something in it.

"Why is everybody looking at him that way?" Nabiki asked. Using her gift for intelligence, she tried to see what the others were seeing. Something about the clothes. Hmm. "I like them better than the lingerie I saw you wearing," she said, gesturing to the photo.

"Me, too! And guess what!? I found my travel pack! I thought it was far away! Way past where Ranma found me as the pig. I had changed right after I got lost from that guy who was chasing me with his wooden sword."

"That was _you(!)?!_ " Akane blushed at the story of how Kuno found a naked man with just a bandana over his...uh, privates.

"Right," Ranma shook her head. "That's why Burin couldn't find the ladies' room and ended up in the men's room."

"Actually," it was Ryoga's turn to blush. "I _wanted_ to go into the men's room. That's where I changed. If I had _really_ gotten lost, I _would_ have ended up where…. Ranma! You were in the ladies room!"

"Get a clue, Ryoga!"

And that was the end of the blinking. Only Nabiki seemed to think it was para-normal that clothes that _should_ have been lost to the pig-boy forever were sudden, mysteriously - Magically! - returned to him.

"SON!"

And thinking of clothes disappearing and then returning...No, more!...Clothes that should have been torn when a large man became instantly transformed into an even larger panda…

From down the hall that led from the bath room, toilet and Mr. Tendo's own room came Ranma's Old huMan. He rolled into the common area, stood up, then struggled to keep from bending over and risk becoming a human ball again.

Genma, no! I beg of you!" said his friend, Soun, who was also rolling in.

Genma ignored him. "As you can see, the _Anything-Goes_ School has learned Dr. Tofu's techniques! It's time I taught them to you!"


	17. Chapter 19 Who Else Wants to Compete?

An unusual disclaimer: Ranma ½ is a trademark of Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ Communications, and its characters have been borrowed without permission. And Son Turned Daughter was originally written way back in 2002 by the FanFiction author Tangent, and his characters Megumi, Yasushi and Ayane have, likewise, been borrowed without permission. Please see the first two chapters of this story under his pen name. This story is written for non-commercial purposes only.

[][][] [][][] [][][]

The red-haired "son" casually looked at her Old Man. Using the training _he_ had given her, she sized him up as the opponent he currently was.

Her answer to his challenge was a swipe. Not at him, but the photo on the table. "Better catch it, or my fiance's gonna see it."

Genma had to reach for it - The wrong way, the sudden crick in his back told him! Having his attention on the photo, he didn't have enough for standing. He folded back towards a ball!

But at least he had the photo in his hand. Of course, he had the dirty mind to misinterpret the frozen moment of her and Ryoga's nightmare battle. "You said he was only going to _sleep_ with you!"

In her lingerie, the little redhead put her little fists up to her face and acted all cute-as-a-button. "I also giggled!"

"Ranma, have you no male pride," Ryoga asked.

"The picture shows I wasn't a male. *Giggle*" _Guh!_ Her mania towards her pop was growing! She was actually doing this in front of a guy who _knew_ , with the absolute certainty that he himself turned into a pig, that she was really a guy herself.

"What are you!?" Genma's anger turned on the pig-boy. "Just how bisexual are you!" he accused.

"Wha, WHAT(!)?!"

"And in my own bed! I'll have to burn it!"

"You don't own that futon, you know!" Nabiki said before her daddy could. "You'll have to pay for it. _Plus_ interest for the wanton destruction of other people's property!"

"Ryoga," Ranma invited.

"Gladly!" Ryoga swung his leg back, ready to-

"Hold it a sec," Ranma said, up and bounded over to her Old Man. She snatched the photo from him. "I'm keeping this to remember our first night together," she said all girly.

"What(!)? What do you _mean_ by that?!" Ryoga cried,

"Oh, don't be so rigid, man! You'll end up all bent outta shape like my pop."

"Right. Okay. I guess." And he punted the ball of human flesh and bone out the open shoji doors and over the Tendo yard's wall.

Ranma put her hand on Ryoga's high, broad shoulder. "Don't tell me you don't got no sense of direction. Pop's headed right for Dr. Tofu's clinic."

"But I wasn't aiming. I didn't even know there was a clinic."

Ranma gave the photo to Ryoga to tear up. "Okay, you don't got no sense of direction. What you got is superior _tracking sense!_ "

"Tracking sense?"

"Sure!" she moved to where he could see her acting like a sensei. "You followed me for _three years!_ You kept getting lost from us, but you _always_ found our trail!"

"Three YEARS!?" Akane cried. "Oh, my," Kasumi said. "Talk about a one-track mind," Nabiki opined.

"Could somebody help me, here," their father pleaded. He was still like a misformed pretzel.

"Oh, my! Sorry, Father!" Kasumi went to him. "Maybe, I can help. I've studied most of Dr. Tofu's books."

Everybody ignored his cries and whimpers of pain.

Meanwhile, Ranma invited Ryoga to sit and have breakfast. He was on her left, Akane on her right. To him, she said, with her mouth full, "You know, I bet when you get lost this next time, you'll find us again pretty soon after."

"Really?" Dared he to hope?!

"Ranma, aren't you forgetting something?" Akane asked.

Ranma looked at her. Then at her now nearly empty bowls of miso soup with rice on the side. "The _Challenge!_ I need to find techniques Madame St. Paul's School-" , " _La Belle France_." , "- Right - techniques _they_ don't use and _won't_ use!"

She looked around the table. Ryoga was picking at his, lost in his own thoughts. And there was her no-good, food-stealing pop's meal. And _he_ wasn't here to defend it!

But _it_ was! A ball of panda came bouncing over the wall and through the shoji doors. [A technique I learned from Tofu!] read its sign.

"Oh, my, how like a panda!" Kasumi smiled. "I've seen pictures of pandas curled around large balls."

"Ow!" her father cried, loudly and wetly. But at least his joints were straight. Too straight. It was difficult, now, to bend them.

Ranma swatted the ball of fur away. It bounced back. Ryoga used his fist. "Hey! I want a turn!" Akane yelled, bringing out her hammer.

"No!" Ranma said, putting her hand on the mallet.

This time when the animal came at them, she grasped it one hand and held it up in the air. But not for long! She had to let go of the hammer and use both hands. With her arms shaking and her body jiggling, the creature began to descend on her.

"Let me," Ryoga said, relieving her of the furry weight. "You're not as strong as a man"

"Hey! Don't be sexist!" Akane cried.

"He's right, Akane," Ranma said, rubbing the ache out of her muscles. "We have to go with what we got. That's the secret to bein' a martial artist. If you don't face reality, you can lose your reality. You could be dead."

"Tell me where to punch him!" Ryoga said.

"Hmm," the redhead looked around. "There. Set him down at the end of the table next to Akane."

[Set me?] That was Ryoga's question, as well. But he did it

"You make sure he stays there, Akane," Ranma told her.

"I will!" she said, making threatening motions with her hammer.

"Ryoga, Ranma wants you back where you were sitting," Nabiki said, her camera out and ready.

"?" went Ryoga. But he did as he was asked.

"You're going to help me develop new eating techniques!" Ranma said chipperly in her girl Japanese. But, in a quieter, male Japanese, she told him, "This is an act. Don't take this seriously." Returning to girl, she said, "I'm going to feed you like you're my big, handsome man and I, his girl, wants to be _so~o_ cute!"

[You're not cute!] Smash! Akane's hammer broke it.

"Open...open…" Ranma urged Ryoga, fingers under his chin and her thumb above it. She applied gentle but persistent pressure...until he finally gave in. His lips were just parted and his teeth could allow only grains of rice to pass.

And _that_ is what Ranma did! She used his chopsticks to inserted grain after grain between them. When she had developed the rhythm, she tapped her thumb beneath his lower lip, her thumb returning to keep control of his jaw and the teeth. Faster and faster her chopsticks went! Faster and faster her thumb went!

"I can't. I want to, but I can't," Nabiki struggled _not_ to comment.

"Don't look at me," Akane said. "I'm not going to hit my finger between my lips and go…. _I almost said the sound!_ "

"Childish," Soun said.

[Cute!] Then, smash!

"Grr!" the redhead said. This wasn't working, in _both ways!_ It wasn't showing how she could eat without people seeing her lips move _AND_ it _wasn't_ making her pop angry and disgusted seeing his son acting like a girl flirting with a guy!

She brought the chopsticks up to, first, Ryoga's, then, her own nostrils. But rejected the idea.

[Give it up! Change back to your true self!] Smash, again!

"I _have to_ stay a girl! The girl is faster than my own body! Speed has _got_ to be the answer!"

"Right," Ryoga nodded. "Like speed is how I can fight as a pig."

"Not just speed," his sensei said. "The pig's also got agility. Dexterity. Endurance. Geez! Those makes it sound like a girl."

"WHAT!?" Akane cried.

[Ranma thinks girls and pigs are alike!]

"Oh, my!"

"They ARE! At least they and little pigs like Ryoga have the same fighting abilities! There's more than just speed in my girl arsenal!" The fire was lit in her. "There's more than one way to approach my problem!"

"And what is that?" Nabiki coolly asked.

"Like _you_ have an idea!"

"I do. Two, in fact. But they probably involve cheating."

"Ranma doesn't cheat!" Ryoga shouted. Then, asked, "Do you?"

"How do I know they're cheatin' unless I hear them?"

"And if you use any, you'll owe me, right? Big time. After all," and she said melodramatically, "I'd have saved you from a marriage to a man you did not love." Then she gave her the wicked gleam, "Bit would be obligated to make love to."

"G-ee-Yuh!" Creepy, disgusting shivers went through her body.

"Ranma!" Akane was at a loss over what to say or do.

Smash! Her hammer hit the food, the bowls and the table in front of her greedy sister. Okay, she _had_ thought of something to do.

Nabiki picked up her napkin and wiped herself with it. Things like this were definitely _not_ supposed to happen to her. What small relief she had was the fact she had just about finished her meal.

"Oh, my! My table setting!"

"I, I -I'm sorry," Akane bowed from her side of the table.

Then she sat straight up. "No, I'm not! Tell _me_ , Nabiki! Tell me, and, and I'll pay the price! Not Ranma: Me!"

"So. You'd be willing to cheat for him. I mean, her? Assuming, Ranma would let you."

"We don't know it's cheating until we hear your ideas! And, yes, I'm prepared! At least, _I_ am a girl! Maybe it's better _I_ marry the guy, Picolet Chardin!" Romeo would be gone from her life anyway if _he_ did! At least she would have saved her fantasy man, His memory would forever live in her woman's heart as _What Could Have Been!_ So romantic!

"No, Akane! No!" her dad cried.

"Why do I get the feeling the other shoe is about to drop?" Nabiki said.

"Oh, my! Father, you, too?" Kasumi wasn't as naive as she let on.

"What?!" Akane was slow on the uptake.

[We _both_ signed the betrothal contract!] But with everybody looking at Soun, they were ignoring the sign.

Whakgh! A thrown sign hit Ranma is the head. "Hey! What'dyou do that-" Then she read it.

"No way! I ain't lettin' Akane take my place, Old Man! And _they_ wouldn't let her! I've got more battle aura potential!"

" _What!?_ I'm just as much a martial artist as _you!_ My potential is strong - It just hasn't been developed! _Nobody has trained me properly!_ Not dad! Not Tofu! And now not even _you_ , Ranma! The only one who even _tried_ was MOM!"

And then she broke down into tears. "And she died before I could make her proud of me being a martial artist."

Ryoga's heart broke. "I'll train you, Akane."

"And _who_ will train you(?)" Ranma said.

"So, this is about battle aura potential," Nabiki said, finished with the napkin. "Then I'll keep the techniques for myself."

"What!?" More than one cried. While one went, "Oh, my!"

"I'll hold off judgment until I meet this...what is his name, Picolet? Chardin? If this rich man isn't the complete idiot Kuno-baby is, he could be the big opportunity I've been looking for."

"You go right ahead, Nabiki!" Ranma laughed. Then said sarcastically, "I can just see you fittin' in with _that_ group of far-out-of-date stuck-ups!"

"But you can see _yourself_ fitting in?" Nabiki _touched_ back.

Ranma wasn't the only one creeped out by the thought. Akane had also met them, the _Les Exiles de la Belle France_ _à présent_ _Gauche_.

Still, there was a greater principle than investment. "I'll _make_ them recognize my potential!"

"And I'll outshine you and make sure they _don't!_ You're gonna marry somebody you _wanna_ marry!"

"Oh, my! I think I'll get in on the fun, too!"

"What!?" , "You, too, Kasumi?" , "Not my last, remaining daughter!" , [Go for it, Kasumi!]

"Yeah, yeah," Ranma said. "Like you have any battle aura potential."

"Oh, my. I don't?" She walked over to the panda. She lightly touched one spot on it.

The panda was no longer contorted into a ball. [I can move again!] the sign read as it tested its sore joints.

"Remember, I have read most of Dr. Tofu's books." She then bowed her head and clapped her hands twice in prayer.

Now the panda was fighting its joints as they twisted back into the shape they had just left.

" _KASUMI!_ " her father wailed, now bent out of shape, again, himself.

"Oh, my! Sorry, Father! But that's what happens when you let somebody who doesn't know what he is doing do something like this to you." And she hurried over to his aid. "This won't be as easy to fix as with Uncle Saotome."

For the first time, Ranma took Kasumi seriously. She probed deep past her surface and into battle aura potential. "Eeeyer!" She may - _may -_ have had a stronger one than she herself had! May have, because, one, she always downgraded any that came close to her own, two, she didn't _know_ what her potential was in _this_ body, and, three, Kasumi's potential was _unlike any_ she had come across before!

Nabiki saw her reaction. "We _never_ make Kasumi angry. You wouldn't like her when she's angry."

"Really?" Ryoga said. "It sounds like we have something in common."

"Don't kid yourself," Ranma said quietly, and more to herself than him. "You have potential. But she has something else." That something wasn't an aura but was similar enough to an aura to just barely flicker on the edge of her perception.

"There you go, Father! Now that I understand how you've been mangled, it will be easier to treat you."

"Treat me(!)? You mean this could recur?"

"Oh, my, yes! Please, be careful not to make any sudden moves, Father."

"Hear _that_ , Pop!? No fights with nobody for a while!"

[Bwa!]

[][][]

Among the items from the woman's (and crossdresser's) appel shop were some that Kuno or Sasuke or the saleswomen commissioned to find the appropriate items would never have sent to the Tendo house. And some that they couldn't have, even if they _had_ tried. Nabiki was the only one to suspect magic at work. Why? After the Miracle of the _Battle of the Sexes_ she was not ready to place any bets on understanding the paradigms behind its operation. She would have to observe more of how _this_ magic, Jusenkyo magic, worked.

So it was that on this day, Sunday, when Ranma didn't have to wear her school uniform, she had on a simple green blouse that could, if the man was manly enough to be _himself_ distracting, pass as a shirt, and special, black, pleated slacks. _Special_ because the pleat disappeared when she wore it as a guy. And since it was _black_ , it was hardly noticeable even when she wasn't a guy. But it _did_ fit her well, allowing others to see the feminine shape of her ass and legs, though, in a modest fashion.

Akane, too, was admiring her own new outfit, when she saw Ranma leaping over the yard's wall. She smiled when she saw what her friend was holding, "You found him!"

"You won't believe where Ryoga got lost to! Even _he_ don't know how he got onto the roof of the school!"

"Here, let me hold him!" she asked, almost demanded, as she reached out for the little, black pig.

"Sorry, man," Ranma said, handing him over. "But I still need to figure out how to win the challenge but lose the betrothal contract." And it would keep Akane from doing her _own_ figuring.

"Poor Ryoga," Akane said, petting him as she held him in her arm like a baby. "I'm going to look for the collar we had for Rokumon."

" _Akane!_ Ryoga is no pet!"

"Of course, he isn't. _I know that_." Akane frowned at her. Just how dense did Ranma think she was!(?) "But a leash is the best way to keep Burin-chan from getting lost."

"His name is _Ryoga!_ "

"Oh, and when Ikuko and the others ask how the little pig is doing, we tell them he's _really_ Ryoga? What kind of name is _that_ for a cutie like this?" And she rubbed it under its chin.

Ranma leaned over, giving it a stare. "Are you smilin', Ryoga? You're enjoyin' bein' in her arms, aren't you?"

"Bwee," it said in its daze.

"Be careful, or _I'll_ be doin' that to you."

"Bwee!"

You say your pet's name was _Roku- mon_? I got a feelin' Ryoga could be a Burin- _mon_ ster." Then she had to ask, "Why'd you call Roku a monster?"

"Because it was! That darn cat was always-"

"C,C,CAT! You _hada_ cat!? What happened to it!? Where is it!? Where!? Where!?"

"Ranma! Rokumon is no longer around! It's _not_ coming back! Calm down! What's your problem?! Please tell me!"

"C,C, those _things_ always do this to me! It's something _else_ I gotta get back at Pop for! I'll tell you about it, but not now! Not until after the Fine Diner has come and gone."

"Aren't you going to ask why we had a leash for a cat, Ranma?" Nabiki smirked.

"No! I don't want to talk or hear nothin' about those, those things."

"It was a Maine Coon. Imported from the United States. A special breed. You can walk them."

"More information than I wanted."

Nabiki bent down to Burin-mon's eye level, smiling. "Magic will out, the leash should be found soon."

It snorted in her face.

"Don't pick on Burin-chan!" Akane said, holding it up her like how a baby is burped.

[][][]

Ranma left Ryoga to his Burin-chan fate. She had more important things on her mind. These led her to the kitchen. "Kasumi, have you seen- There's the iron corset! It looks great! Thanks, Kasumi!"

"It was easy to remove the rust. I just used the things I had in this kitchen. A lot of the steel came off, though. The rust _was_ steel. Or iron. It isn't very good steel."

"Okay," Ranma nodded. It might be important to know if something happened to it in the middle of the battle. Though, what damage it could receive during a rule-bound eating contest where the only thing touched was the food she had no idea!

She inspected the crack. "Hairline." Not really noticeable. Yet. It had started where her pop's knee had been and moved sideways. Its two ends were stopped by the rounded, reinforcing rims left and right of the center of the hourglass segment of armor.

Ranma remained squatting, and staring, and thinking. "They, the Fine Diners, said _this_ was an important part of their school's eating technique. I don't see how." Her hand on the crack was. "It seems more like something for people who _don't_ want to eat, to diet. It shouldn't give the stomach room to let more food in." Her hand moved down lower on the corset. "The only way the extra food could go is up - puke - or…. I don't even want to say the word." It seemed to upset her womanly sensibilities.

"Skat."

"Kasumi!"

"I _am_ the one that cleans the toilet." Then she had a thought. "Do you think the _La Belle France_ gentlemen and ladies also wear diapers?"

"Kasumi, please! No more. I recently ate." Geez! How can a woman think of things like that!?

"Yes! You ate _my_ food!" Genma said, coming into the kitchen. He went straight to the refrigerator. He swung open the door!

"Uncle Saotome! Do you want me to pray for you?"

"What?" He was distracted by his hunt for a meal. Then he _wasn't!_ He slammed the door shut.

"Uncle, would you kindly pick up the magnets that have fallen off the door?"

"Magnets? Of course, Kasumi-dear."

"...What's the secret to their iron corsets?"

[][][]

"Ah, yes. Iron!" Soun Tendo nodded from his usual place at the head of the Tendo table. "It has some unusual properties, and I am not talking about modern science, but _ancient_ science, Onmyodo and the related ways of magic from around the world. Especially China."

"Magic!" There was that evil word again!

"Our former master, that of your father and I, was an avid collector of anything-goes lore, _including_ magics. I have nearly his complete collection of books, scrolls and clay tablets in my attic. If you would care to go through the material…."

"No, Mr. Tendo. I ain't got the time to wild-goose chase."

"Ah, yes. Chapter 37 of _Canadian Wisdom of the_ -"

"Mr. Tendo! Tell me quickly about what you know about iron! Steel! It may _save_ your girls!"

"My daughters! Wah!"

"Don't get the tears on the iron corset!" Ranma cried, pulling away to the other side of her.

"Right! Right!" he said, snuffling up his tears. "For my daughters!" Then he seemed ready to begin all over again with, "And you, my future _son_ -in-law! If you're somebody else's wife, how can you be one of my daughter's husband!?"

"The Iron!" Ranma demanded. "Or do I go all the way to the Doc's?! Maybe I should! I'm not gettin' anywhere here."

"It's Sunday, Ranma," Kasumi told him. "This is his one day off. He's probably visiting his mother. But I could look up her number."

"No!" both of them cried.

"What are you talking about?" Nabiki said, coming in, eating an apple.

"Magic!" Kasumi smiled.

"Bye!" Nabiki said, leaving. "I think the less I know, the better. I'll go "play" with Burin-chan and Akane. She's up in the attic looking for Rokumon's things and finding things saved from when we were infants." And she said with a laugh in her voice, "He doesn't have much male pride!"

"Ryoga's got _plenty of male pride!_ " Ranma told her, tempted to wrap the corset around _her_ \- how can anybody with _womanly_ pride wear that?! "How would _you_ like bein' stuck with a pig's brain!?"

"Oh?" she pauses. "And just how much of the brain of a pig does he have? He obviously can understand you. Language skills aren't exactly porcine. I'm willing to bet he can also read and do just about anything human his little, hooved body allows."

"Magic don't gotta make sense!"

"Maybe. Ciao, "Little Sister"!"

"Are you stayiin', Kasumi?"

"I don't really need to hear about magic. I have my book learning from Dr. Tofu's library, and I have my prayers and my songs. But I'm done with my chores, for now. So, yes, I'll stay."

"..."prayers" and "songs"?" Ranma shook her head. "Back to you, Mr. Tendo - IRON!"

"You need not shout!" The man's nerves were getting on Ranma's. "Iron, then. According to the Wisdom of the East, from _yinyang_ came the five agents. One of them is termed "metal", for metal is the best example of it. And iron is the best example of metal. Others think the metals that go into the alchemic formula for immortality-"

"I don't _want to_ hear about immortality!"

"Right. It's probably too late for me, anyway. I'd have to be as fortunate as the Eight Immortals-"

"Father!"

"Uh, right, Kasumi. Forgive me. Iron is the secret of lodestone, which points to the north. The truest North is that found at the end of the Northern Bushel, or Little Dipper, or Little Bear. It is the Pole Star! That is where the truest, purest of the Tao/Dao is, the Primordial Breath. That is where Kami-sama, the Supreme One, is most at home. Everything else literally turns around that Star of Stars, the Hub of the World."

Ranma looked at the iron corset. "You tellin' me, this thing might be able to…." She frowned, trying to relate what she heard to something she _did_ understand, the martial arts. "This corset might have access to the _Ki_ of all _ki_ energies?"

"I hadn't thought of it that way, but yes. And no. If the iron _came_ from a meteorite, it could have heavenly _ki_ , otherwise, it has Earthly _ki_. Earthly _ki_ does not point to True North."

"Iron has its own, particular magic," Kasumi said. "It has been known to both aid and disrupt different magics." She, then, smiled more. "Or so I have read."

A glint comes to Ranma's eyes. "Wouldn't it be somethin' if this could disrupt magic used against me? Kasumi, Mr. Tendo, help to cinch me in it! Oh, and St. Paul used a lock. Got any iron ones?"

[][][]

She was back to wearing just her lingerie. This time, most of her chemise under the corset.

"Tight!" Mr. Tendo _could_ be strong! "I have to adjust the way I breathe!"

"The Primordial Breath has been compared to the softness of the breath of a baby," Mr. Tendo said.

"Right! Breathing is always important to a martial artist. And yoga. And mystic magic. It's _gotta_ be part of the secret of this thing!" Ranma stood there in it, searching for the type of breathing with the right feel.

After she thought she found it, she asked, "Now, what?" A few minutes later, her impatience was getting to her, "I have to _do_ somethin'!" She started in on one of her katas, martial arts patterns of movements. But she wasn't thinking of them. "Maybe you know magic words to make the magic work?"

"Why not pray to Kami-sama him/herself," Kasumi suggested.

"Or the Yellow Emperor of Earth," Mr. Tendo said. "Of course, if the iron _does_ come from a meteorite, it would be better to pray to the Jade Emperor of Heaven."

"Oh, Father. That seems more Chinese than Japanese."

"I'm prayin'! I'm prayin'!" She gave up her kata and dropped down to her knees.

"How un-Japanese," Kasumi said.

"You're right!" She slammed her hands down onto the table. "And un-me. I'm a guy of _action!_ There's gotta be somethin' I can _do!_ " Her impatience and nervousness growing, she started drumming the tabletop with her fingers.

Her eyes drifted down to her bust. Or, rather, below it. She placed her hand on the corset. "This might be it."

" "It"?" Mr. Tendo asked.

Ranma moved her hand away to let Big Sister touch it. "Oh, my, I understand. You are beating your belly against its inside," Kasumi smiled.

"And its vibrations are havin' an effect on _my_ insides! And the food I ate! Now, I just gotta find the pattern of beats that feels right!"

"But you said if somebody sees your mouth open, you lose. How will what happens below the mouth affect your mouth? "

"I, Don't, _Know!_ " she screamed in frustration.

[][][]

Ranma had taken her pacing out to the greater room of the yard. She always ended near the koi pond. She finally looked at the symbol of her curse and the body it had given her. The sun came over the roof and the water reflected its rays in its glistening surface.

"Flash! FLASH! There was always a flash that went with her eatin' technique!"

She rushed to her advisors and told them.

"Electromagnetism?" Kasumi suggested. , "Lightning," Mr. Tendo nodded.

"But there _was_ no lightning! I _woulda_ picked up on it!"

"Not if it was directed not to earth but to Heaven. Hear me out, Son. The Sages were famously transported to the Little Dipper on the back of a bear carrying a bushel basket. Er, well, not literally, but it does make sense of all the different names for the constellation."

"And the Little Dipper was used to collect Milky Whey." When both of them looked at her oddly, she said, "The metaphor _does_ have to do with food."

Getting more serious, she suggested, "Perhaps instead of beating against the iron corset with your belly, you should try rubbing it. Rubbing could bring out its static electricity."

[][][]

"Why does this magic hafta be so complicated?" Ranma asked herself glumly after Mr. Tendo and Kasumi had left to prepare for the match with the _la Belle France_ School of Martial Arts Fine Dining.

"Because _you_ are making it complicated," Nabiki said, coming into the common room. "And, I venture to say, _they_ are, too. Magic doesn't have to be complicated."

Ranma looked at her. And she rose to her feet. "You're wearin' clothes just like _they_ wear!"

"You like?" Nabiki said, doing a turn in her mauve, hoop-skirt dress. Except for the elegant draping effect, it was quite simple (pouf shoulders not counted). It did show the tops of her boobs. "You like? I found it in my armoire closet. You know, as if by _magic_."

"I'm sick of hearin' about magic! If it ain't got nothin' to do with winnin', I'm not listenin'!"

"But it _is_ about winning. Me winning. Apparently, I have magic on my side, this time."

Ranma stopped and listened. "You mean you might really win? And if _you_ win…." A smile came to her face.

And then she lost it. "That would mean _I_ lost!"

"You're really a hopeless case, aren't you, Saotome. You'd risk getting married to another man, just so you can say you didn't lose a challenge?"

"Yes!"

"You really are a hopeless case." It was Nabiki's turn to smile, "I'm back to thinking Jusenkyo magic is about making your life worse. It's betting on you losing."

"I _won't_ lose! And I _won't marry_ that guy! And _there Will be_ a rival school!"

"Bet?"

Ranma growled. But she barked, "Yes!"

"You'd better get into your own dress," Akane said, in a yellow hoop-skirt one with pink bows on it. She was pushing a baby carriage. Ranma didn't have to guess who - no, what - was in it.

"I ain't gonna dress up in a get-up like that!"

"Then you'll forfeit the challenge."

" _What!?_ "

"Honestly, Ranma! You remember how you had to dress for it at the restaurant! Madame St. Paul said she wouldn't compete against anybody in the "elegance of etiquette" unless they at least _looked_ elegant." She then looked down at the decolletage that showed the tops of _her_ boobs, and frowned, " _Her version_ of elegant."

"Forfeit and you lose," Nabiki smiled.

[][][]

Ranma was wearing either an exact copy of the dress she had worn in the restaurant or, somehow, the same dress: bare arms, puffy sleeves, low neckline, and pink with red ribbons around the hooped-skirt. She even had on the petticoats and pantaloons. And the iron corset, of course. "Stupid."

Nabiki was not amused. "The more of this kind of clothes I see, the more I think magic _might_ be helping you to win, Ranma. You may very well become Mrs. Picolet Chardin, and not me."

"Oh, my, everybody else has dresses like mine," Kasumi said, coming in, wearing a baby blue and lacy versions of theirs.

She doesn't stay on the subject, though, as she notices the baby carriage, "Oh, my! Is Ryoga in there?"

"Call him _Burin-chan_ ," Akane said.

"Bwee! Bwee!" Ryoga asked her to, too.

"It's gonna be less embarrassin' for the guy if everybody does call him that when he's the pig." Ranma could relate. She had been thinking of letting everybody at school know about her curse, but the more being the girl was hurting her manly pride, the harder it was becoming to actually do it. Everybody, at least, thought _Romeo_ was manly (despite his tights...and silk underwear).

"I have never worn a tuxedo before," Mr. Tendo said, running his finger around the collar, feeling he might choke in it. "I do wish Kasumi would allow me to wear my do-gi. This is a martial arts battle."

"It's a battle over who can be the best at Fine Dining, Father."

Ranma looked at him, then looked down at what _she_ herself was wearing. "Why do the guys get to wear dark" , "or white" , "clothes(!)? Why must girls' things be colorful!" And hers pink!

The Tendo front door opened and somebody called out, " _Bonjour, honorables mesdames et messieurs_ , I have arrived to transport you to the Fine Dinner." It was that Aron, the guy who had driven the carriage that had brought Ranma, Akane, and their dates to their homes last night.

"I _still_ haven't got the hang of this corset! I'm gonna have to wait and see if I can see how _they_ use theirs! Maybe _then(!)_ I'll get the missin' clue!"

"But _I'm_ ready for my maybe-cheats," Nabiki smiled.

"I'm as ready as I'll ever be. Isn't that right, Burin-chan?" Akane said, reaching into the baby carriage and rubbing its ear.

"Bwee, bwee!" it agreed.

"And I, as well," Kasumi said. "I have an idea how I can dine finely."

"Okay," Ranma screwed up her courage and started for the door.

She was almost out of the common room before she realized, "Hey, where's Pop?"

"I prayed that Uncle Saotome wouldn't cause trouble," Kasumi said.

The little redhead smiled. "Is he a human or a panda ball?"

[][][]

"You do know you're going to have to leave that baby carriage behind(?)" Nabiki said. "It will not fit into this horse-drawn carriage."

"Not with four of us wearin' hoop skirts!" Ranma said.

"I hadn't thought of that!" Akane said, greatly disappointed.

"How far is it to this skyscraper restaurant?" Kasumi asked.

"I am not to transport you to any of the Chardin restaurants. Or to his estate, either," Aron informed them. "A different arrangement has been made by Monsieur Kuno."

"Kuno!?"

"We're _not_ to be having it in the Kuno Castle, are we?!" Nabiki demanded to know.

"Oh, my, no!" Aron assured them. "Monsieur Chardin et entourage refuses to enter such a dangerous place!"

"That's a relief!" the redhead said. "Not only is that where Kuno is, but that Kodachi, too!"

"Don't forget Headmaster Kuno," Akane said.

"Actually, the Kunos, Tatewaki and Kodachi, haven't seen their dad in years," Nabiki informed them. "Tatewaki-baby, in fact, completely refuses to recognize the Headmaster as his long-lost daddy. Such is the power of denial." And she as she was saying this, she was looking at her big sister, Kasumi.

And then her little sister and her pig.

"So, where's this Fine Dinin' eatin' match gonna be?!" Ranma demanded.

"As I was informed, since the others that were with you last night were interested, the arrangement allows _them_ to view the event. And they invited their friends to join them."

"Ack! It sounds like everybody at school's gonna see me win or lose!" Ranma said, actually daring to think she _might_ lose - And in the most humiliating way!

"Oui, Mademoiselle, that is exactly where the event is being conducted, at Furinkan High School."

"That's wonderful!" Akane said. "Then I can walk there!"

"Akane! Don't be stupid! You can't walk all the way to school pushin' a baby carriage and dressed like that!" Ranma tried to talk sense to her.

But she, too, ended up walking to school in a hoop-skirt. And Akane even got her to push the baby carriage. _But only once!_

[][][] [][][] [][][]

In the 346th chapter of the manga, _Kasumi Gets Mad_ , everybody is deathly afraid of that she might. So there is some justification that she _could_ have special abilities that even skilled martial artists would have trouble dealing with. And, by the way, Kasumi _has_ been shown to get angry in the manga.


	18. Chapter 20 Saved From Fine Dining!

An unusual disclaimer: Ranma ½ is a trademark of Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ Communications, and its characters have been borrowed without permission. And Son Turned Daughter was originally written way back in 2002 by the FanFiction author Tangent, and his characters Megumi, Yasushi and Ayane have, likewise, been borrowed without permission. Please see the first two chapters of this story under his pen name. This story is written for non-commercial purposes only.

[][][] [][][] [][][]

While I want to keep this story as true to the series _Ranma ½_ as the premise allows (and the speeded up meetings of the people who enter Ranma's life in the manga and anime), I believe in this one instance I have reason to make it a crossover. Which _two_ other manga/anime series are involved is revealed at the end of this chapter.

[][][] [][][] [][][]

The four-horse team and its carriage passed Ranma and Akane and her baby carriage as they approached Dr. Tofu's clinic. Her father and sisters waved to them from inside.

From the walkway of the closed clinic stepped Ayane and Yasushi, Megumi's girls.

"What are you two doing here? You don't live around here," Akane asked, suspicious.

"Megumi told us about your dates yesterday," Ayane said.

"Ayane wants to hear more of the gossip," Yasushi said.

Akane and Ranma continued on their way. The other two followed.

"Ranma, you kissed Kodachi! And, then, you kissed Mikado Sanzenin of the Golden Pair!"

"You wanted to kiss Azusa, but that girl got away from you."

"What do you think of your step-brother, Romeo, kissing Kodachi like he did!"

"In women's apparel."

"He was wearin' a tanktop and boxers!" Ranma insisted.

"In a shop for women."

"And crossdressers," Yasushi added.

"I, my -Romeo's _Not_ whatever a crossdresser is!" Ranma insisted.

"Look, there are Ikuko and Akiko!" Akane said, eager to change the subject. She waved to them.

They waved back and hurried up the hill to them.

"They were on the date, too! -Hey, girls, Romeo's no crossdresser, right(!)?!" Ranma yelled.

"Ranma!" Akane tried to get her not say the word. As usual, she was clueless.

"Romeo?" , "Ooh! Romeo!" , "He has _such_ a male vibe!" , "More guys should crossdress like Romeo!" , "Remember when we first met him? He was dressed up for a play!" , "Yeah! A romantic play!" , "And he was wearing tights!" , "He has nice legs!" , "I'd like to see him in a codpiece *Giggle*"

"Ikuko!" Akiko was surprised. That was _so_ out of character for her.

"I can have some fun, too," the usually serious young woman said.

"But he _was_ wearing lingerie?" Ayane asked.

"A chemise and tap panties," Yasushi said.

Ikuko and Akiko looked at one another, then at the other two. They smiled and said as one, "On _him_ , they looked good!"

"Yeah. That's what Megumi said." Ayame admitted defeat. Almost, "But Ranma _did_ go about kissing people, boys, _and girls!_ "

"How bisexual is Ranma?" Yasushi asked.

"Uh! Uh!" Akane searched for a response. "Ranma's dad _did_ raise her to think she was a boy!"

"Okay," Ikuko accepted that explanation. "The Date Management Club will help her to think she is a girl!"

"And like men!" Akiko also accepted the challenge.

"Unless Ranma really _is_ bisexual," Ayane smiled.

"And likes girls more than guys," Yasushi said.

"Ranma! Akane!" shouted and waved Makoto and Shikako coming to join the group. "What's with the weird costumes?" , "Who wears hoops-skirts!?" ...

[][][]

The group of eight didn't become larger only because there was no more room near Ranma and Akane and her baby carriage. But ahead, and even behind, them, they saw more and more people on their way towards Furinkan High. And not just other teens, but adults, and, then people living above their stores in the business district. And Akane recognized most of them.

To anybody who asked about the baby carriage, she told them, "This is my new pet, Burin-chan!" , "Please, don't pick him up! He's so little and there are too many people around!" , "If I didn't have him in the carriage, he might get lost." , "He becomes lost easily, poor thing!" , "If he does become lost, will you, please, return him to us?" , "Yes, Ranma or me." , "And tell us if _anybody_ is picking on him!" , "Right! Anybody who hurts Burin-chan will have to answer to _us!_ " , "You don't want to make _us_ angry!"

"Aw, Akane, you don't have to be overprotective. Ryo- Burin can take care of himself," Ranma said. "Especially after I train him."

"If _Ranma_ trains him, he could probably enter Sumo pig wrestling tournaments!" Shikako said.

"People pay to watch people wrestle pigs?" Ranma didn't want to believe it. But she had a vision of a human porker trying to push out of the clay-and-roped circle a hog just as big.

"No, people pay to watch pigs wrestle pigs," Makoto said. "I have a cousin, Akari Unryu, who raises Sumo pigs and competes them."

"Burin would be squashed. It's too little," Yasushi said.

"Ha! Burin could beat even an 800 lb, 360 kg, large, black pig!"

"Bwee! Bwee!" the _little_ , black pig agree.

[][][]

It was Sunday. The gates of the school would normally be shut. But they were open now. And there, greeting everybody, was the Headmaster. "Cheerio! Pip, pip! Tallyho! Rather!" the lunatic said in his fake British accent. "Bit of a bother, but the main course has been changed. Too many spectators, you know. It's no longer in the gym. Rather, the table has been set out on the main sports field. Be good to follow the crowd…"

"He's wearing a _really_ old-fashioned tuxedo," Akane noticed. "It has long tails."

"He lost his tan," Ranma noticed.

"He's wearing makeup." , "A foundation." , "A very pasty one."

"He's wearing a monocle," Yasushi said.

" _I say!_ There you are, Master Saotome! And Young Mistress Akane, too! Good show! I have your escort through this beastly crowd! Clap! Clap!"

And out to greet them came the Alpha Male Club. To say they weren't wearing tuxedos would be an understatement. They were in just their competition shoes, socks, and trunks. Revealed were the rest of their bodies-beautiful (or, in the case of the weightlifters, just plain muscular ones). Of course, while they waited, the bodybuilders among them had to pose and flex.

For a moment, the small redhead was mesmerized. But only for a moment. She knew full well those were the wrong kind of muscles for martial arts.

"Stay in the middle of the Club, Akane-san and Ranma-san, and we'll get you safely to the lunch," Taichi, their president, said.

Akane was about to protest when she looked down at Burin-chan in the carriage. It would have a better chance inside a convoy. -Assuming none of the big lummoxes tripped!

"You do that, then! I'm gonna-" But before Ranma could leap away, Akane had grabbed her by the arm. "Do you really want to try that in a hoop-skirt?"

Ranma looked at it. Thought of the aerodynamics. And saw the skirt revealing everything underneath as she came down. Okay, that wouldn't bother her. But, _then_ , the rush of air would thrust the skirt all the way up, interfering with her arms and sight!

So, Ranma walked like an old-fashioned lady with another one with an old-fashioned carriage surrounded by big, large, half-nude men. Her only comfort was they were so wide she was half-hidden behind this wall of male flesh.

[][][]

Yesterday, the school had been in a shambles after the _Battle of the Sexes_. Today almost all of the evidence was gone.

Yesterday, this sports field had been surrounded by the girls of the school. Today, it was being surrounded by those who couldn't find spots on the bleachers.

Yesterday, this sports field had held half the boys of the school captive. Today, there was a 20 x 20 ft, 6 x 6 m, wrestling ring with, inside its padded ropes, a 7 ft, 2 m, formally set dining table. For the while, the platters and tureens were covered with lids.

And behind the table were four antique, French chairs on each side. Nabiki and Kasumi were already sitting on the north side. Opposite them, on the south side, were, man/woman, Chance, a young woman Ranma didn't know, Picolet Cardin, and St. Paul. Standing on the ground by the raised platform of the ring was a somebody in a waitress uniform with touches of a nurse's.

Mr. Tendo was his daughter's and Ranma's recognized coach. He helped the "ladies" up the steps and between the ropes as "elegantly" as possible. Akane's entrance into the ring was made all the more awkward for her insisting on bringing Burin-chan, on a leash and swaddled in a baby blanket.

First Akane, then Ranma sat down. All the ladies had to keep their hands on the hoop-skirts to keep them down. Kasumi was a natural at it, Nabiki knew how to do it well. Akane had the weight of a little pig to help her. Ranma...well, at least she didn't show her petticoats and pantaloons.

Then the referee entered the ring. He descended riding the giant hook of a construction crane. But he was pretending he was parachuting down at the end of his open umbrella.

Ranma wasn't paying him any attention. Her trained senses were warning her of the danger of the unknown teen next to Chardin. She was obviously not Japanese. She had pale skin, platinum blonde hair and wore all white clothes that fit in well with those the _la Belle France_ School of Martial Arts Fine Dining were making them her and the Tendo sisters wear. As further accouterments were her bouquet of white lilies and...an ornate picture frame propped up behind her.

"I say!" the HeadcaseMaster said, jumping the last feet down onto the mat. "Let's get this show on the road, shall we? Right-ho!" And he closed his brolly.

"Master!" the small ninja, Sasuke, said, offering the microphone up to him.

"Oh, bother! I won't be bothered. You keep pace and see that my words are heard, there's a good man.

"On this side, facing north," he said, pointing with his brolly, "is _la Belle France_ School of Martial Art of Fine Dining! Their captain is none other than the heir to _a Belle France Cuisine de le Gourmands_ family of restaurants, Mr. Picolet Chardin III!"

" _Monsieur!_ " Chardin corrected as he rose to accept the applause of the crowd.

The _Silky Darling_ crashed against Ranma's defenses! Too many of the girls and women's hearts beat faster at the sight of this handsome blonde! What saved her own girl brain from being swept up in their delight was the disapproval enough had for his hair! This was Japan, and many disapproved of hair not native to their homeland. Still, Ranma again was reminded just how much of a girl she could be. And that was _exactly_ why she _had to_ be a girl! Only by confronting her condition could she hope to stay in control of her emotions and impulses! But it was hard practice!

And their captain and first representative of this challenge match-"

"Psst! Master," Sasuke said, "they wish it to be called a duel."

"Rather not. Too French for my tastes. -Sandurin san Pouru-san!"

" _That's_ _Madame Sandrine Saint Paul!_ " she rose up in her greatest dignity to protest.

"In France. But when in Rome, as the saying goes. That is how most here pronounce your name, is it not?"

"Can it, Kuno!" She said, in English, to Kaneto Kuno.

"I say, Old Girl! Let's not be testy! Why can't you adopt a good Japanese name, like this beauty of tomorrow, a princess in name only, Asuka Saginomiya!"

The white girl of the lilies rose to accept the adoration of the boys and men of the audience. Having far, far more practice being a guy, and, also, having had years of _Chaste Warrior_ training, Ranma was able to resist the male feelings the sight of her aroused. (Though her girl brain responded to the overall critique the born-females were giving Asuka.) But more immediate than those was the sense of danger Ranma had about her. She was trouble!

"And, lastly, is the second, Chansu. (No family name)."

" _Monsieur_ Chance Gamblers." he, at last, rose and bowed.

And then headed to the Headmaster. "What is ze meaning of zese insults!"

"Oh, piffle, Old Boy! I'm just demonstrating my neutrality as the referee. I, too, am a European, you know."

"You are not! You are Japanese!"

"I dare say, we Brits and they are island peoples. Perhaps that is what confuses you."

"I shall challenge you to a game of chance when this is over!" And he returned to his side.

"And here, with their backs to the north, is the _Anything-Goes_ School of Martial Arts, Unqualified!

"I say, you sound a bit of a group of unmitigated bounders. Are you sure you wish to be known as willing to do _anything?_ Are you willing to cheat?"

Her sisters looked at Nabiki. The Ice Queen was unmoved.

"Are you willing to lie?"

"I never lie," Nabiki said.

"Get on with it, or I'll make you bald like a Buddhist monk!" Ranma cried. Geez! He was making her sorry she had cut off his topknot and changed him from thinking he was Hawaiian to this flavor-of-the-day nut-job!

"One must be moderate in all things. Except for the Eightfold Path," he clasped his hands and bowed, giving her a taste of his fake monk.

But he went back to being fake British, "Their coach is none other than the heir of the Tendo Training Hall, Kohai Soun Tendo!"

"Thank you!" Soun bowed from his place on the ground. "Thank you, friends and neighbors!"

"And their captain and first representative," and Ranma rose, "is Ms. Nabiki Tendo!"

"Hey! I'm the captain and the one challenging St. Paul!" Ranma cried.

"You say something, Young Miss? The Rules of Fighting say the referee is to only recognize the captains and coaches."

"You're just still mad at me for giving _you_ a haircut!"

"Unless Nabiki paid him," Akane said to Burin-chan alone. The Kunos were too rich to be bought, but too crazy not to accept bribes, anyway.

"Give it a rest, Ranma," Nabiki said. "All you have to lose is me to another man. Or do you _want_ to marry another man?"

"You're making a fool of yourself!" Akane told the redhead, pulling her back down by her skirt. And Burin-chan, of course, agreed with her.

Ranma crossed her arms over her bust and fumed. "I hope she humiliates herself."

[][][]

The lids were taken off the platters and tureens revealing what the waiter and waitress were serving up onto the plates and bowls. The referee told the audience what was the seven-course meal: "hors-d'oeuvres, Vichyssoise soup, chicken basquaise, Pont L'Eveque cheese and Normandy apple bread, honey almond crêpes, creme brulee French press coffee and a digestif."

Nabiki stood on one side of the 3 ft, 1 m, wide table, Madame St. Paul on the other. Even in Japan, Nabiki thought it would be difficult to meet somebody who seemed so rigidly proper.

"Everybody ready for a go? Then Tally-ho, and-"

"Hold it!" Nabiki raised her hand. "Where are the salt and pepper?! How do you expect me to eat something not seasoned to my own personal taste! Nabiki Tendo insists on having things to her own personal taste."

" _Sacré bleu!_ _Non!_ There is no greater offense to ze chef zan to question _his_ taste! If you do not prefer _his_ taste, you should take _your_ taste _elsewhere!_ "

"Oh, I should forfeit over bad food."

" _La Belle France Cuisine de le Gourmands_ serves only the _finest_ , _à la_ _French_ , of cuisine!"

Nabiki leaned on the table and faced off with the woman old enough to be her eldest aunt, "The customer is _always_ right, as the Americans say. If it does not meet _my_ tastes, it's bad. And I'll tell that to anybody and everybody. They will all-"

"Here, Miss Nabiki," Sasuke said, coming out from under the hanging tablecloth and holding the mike up for her.

She took it. "Everybody! I have something to say! This French food is-"

Flash!

And the microphone was gone and in St. Paul's hand.

Ranma leaned forward in her chair. All of her trained senses were on the alert! She _had to_ discover the secret to their technique!

"Chance!" St. Paul motioned to her second. Who motioned to the waitress on the ground. Who motioned to… Eventually, the motion reached their catering truck...

...and Nabiki had her salt and pepper.

She frowned. "This is a pepper grinder."

Madame St. Paul came close to smirking. "You were expecting to cause me to sneeze and have me open my mouth and, so, lose ze contest? Ze move is legal, but this _repas_ will present you with no opportunity to use ze maneuver."

"Really?" And Nabiki began grinding over a fancy, silk napkin.

Flash! Flash! Flash! The hors d'oeuvres disappeared faster as she could grind.

The soup would be next. Nabiki had to work with what she had! She flicked the napkin and sent the ground pepper at St. Paul! The Madame of Fine Dining was experienced. She knew how to counter the attack.

Nabiki knew that, too. With her other hand, she sent her bowl of soup towards her opponent. Now, was the woman _so_ experienced she could handle _two_ attacks at once?

Between each Flash! there was a Wave~ of her hand that kept her nose clear. The soup disappeared in mid-air and she did not sneeze! Now, _that_ was experience!

But Nabiki had discovered some already ground pepper in the grinder and had saved it in a corner of her hand (little, pinky and palm). She blew that and caught off-guard the woman still recovering from the last attacks.

Madame St. Paul sneezed!

It happened quickly! More rapidly than most could or would notice! But _Ranma_ saw!

She fell off her chair in surprise and disgust!

The Old Woman's lips had gone two feet, 60 cm, out from her face! And her jaw had dropped a foot, 30 cm!

But, then, she was _back_ to having the tight-lipped, prim and proper mouth.

Nabiki started tossing whatever was handy, and as rapidly as she could at St. Paul!

Flash! Flash! Fash! But instead of disappearing, they all were returned to their proper place on the table!

-Only to have Nabiki re-use it to re-toss!

Nabiki had thrown so many so quickly, St. Paul wasn't quite finished with one attack before she had to deal with another!

Again, Ranma felt amazed and sickened! The woman could stretch out her tongue _three, maybe four feet, 90 - 120 cm!_ And not just stretch it, but use like a New World monkey's tail! It was prehensile and she would catch, lift and carry things as easily as a tentacle of an octopus could! But _in air_ , not water!

Madame St. Paul knew she could not finish the duel by eating all of the food thrown at her. This upstart reaching past her class, Nabiki Tendo, was not the only opponent she had to face that day. While she, like all of the members of _Les Exiles_ , was a gourmand, there was a price to pay for excessive eating. She was unwilling to pay it, at this time. Not on this unworthy opponent!

Flash! among flashes! And Nabiki felt something damp snap against a pressure point of her wrist. As what happens when a doctor taps a hammer against a knee, she reflexively lost control!

She spilled creme brulee coffee on her dress! To add insult to injury, the coffee went down the large amount of cleavage her decolletage revealed. At least it wasn't scaldingly hot.

"Bit of a bad show, Young Missy," referee Headmaster said. "You seem to have lost your elegance. You certainly have demonstrated no etiquette, eh, what?"

[][][]

Nabiki returned to her seat in defeat. It was no great loss for her. She had had an idea and had tried her best. More importantly, she had given Ranma (and possibly Akane) a preview of the opponent they were about to face. She would collect on the debt one way or another.

"Did you see?" Ranma whispered to Akane.

"I think...I don't want to believe it." What she thought she had seen Madame St. Paul doing was like a trick of the imagination, something just at the edge of reality, one that was gone before she was sure it had come.

"She's a monster! They _all_ have to be! _That's_ the horrible secret of their technique!"

"Oh, Ranma! Don't judge them by appearances. They're snooty, uptight, out-of-date snobs, but they seem alright, otherwise. They _let you use_ the iron corset you have on!"

"Eeh!" Ranma's warding fingers went up. "They, they want to make _me_ a monster, too!"

"Ranma! They're not monsters!" She hoped.

"The second representative of the _Anything-Goes_ School is Mrs. Kasumi Tendo!" the Headmaster announced.

"Oh, my, no. I'm not a _Missus_ , I'm a _Miss_. But I'll pass my turn to my Little Sister, Akane."

"Hey! You've been callin' _me_ your _Little Sister_ , too!" Ranma wanted _her_ turn!

"Akane, do you really think your rival school of Martial Arts Fine Dining is worth the risk?" her big sister asked. "Even if it _had_ worked, it might be...past its sell-by date."

"I, I _have_ to try!" she told herself more than anybody else. She rose to her feet (lost under the hoop-skirt)

"I _am_ a martial artist! I _will_ take the risk! Ranma's not the only one who can pull off impossible feats!" And she strode to the table, her little bundle of pig in her arms.

"Really sorry to say this, Young Girl, but you have disqualified yourself," the referee told her. And the Headmaster looked over to Kasumi. "You as well, Older Girl."

"Great! That means it's _My_ turn!" Ranma cried.

"I won't let you! I'll _have_ my chance to prove I'm a martial artist!" Akane screamed. And Burin-chan squealed just as loudly, too.

"Excuse me," Kasumi said, coming over to calm her sister and her pig down. While her warm, gentle hands rubbed them, she asked the man, "May I ask why we are disqualified?"

"Oh, I rather suppose that you have no idea about the Rules of Fighting, you Innocent Thing You. There is a set order to who precedes who, you know."

"Oh, my, you're saying that I disqualified myself by not following the protocol of the list of who goes before who? Oh, my, that does go against etiquette. May I ask to see the list?"

"Say what?" Of course, the Headmaster had no formal list. He was going to dismiss her, anyway, but he could not take his eyes away from hers. His turbulent soul was falling into the abyss of her peaceful soul. He would be sitting and meditating if he stayed there too long. He felt he could lose his need to keep the world spinning!

[][][]

"Ranma," Kasumi said as she passed her. "I am pretty sure Akane will win. But you will have the most important part in today's event. Please, be prepared. I must go now to pray and sing...

"Why, thank you, Father," she said as he helped her get between the ropes and down the steps. She then made her way through the crowd.

She passed the caterers bringing the replacement courses of hors-d'oeuvres and soup.

[][][]

"You are fighting with a pig?" Madame St. Paul accused.

"Is there anything in the rules that says I can't?! And I'm _not_ trying to insult you! This is very important to my school of Martial Arts Fine Dining!"

"Animals are not allowed at ze table!"

"Burin-chan will not have to be at the table! I'm keeping him in my arms. What could be Finer Dining than not only _not_ seeing my mouth move but my hands, too!

"And even, if he _did_ end up on the table, he's _clean!_ And he's had all his…." She looked down at him. "Have you had all of your shots? We'll see that you do."

"BWEE!" In its struggle to get out of Akane's arm, the thing he had been holding under the blanket fell out and down onto the mat of the wrestling ring.

"Ryo-Burin-chan!" Akane cried, seeing her chance of winning fumbled.

"Here you are, Miss Akane Tendo," Sasuke said, handing her the antique, Japanese incense burner. "And here's the packet of incense that was in it."

"Thank you! Thank you, Mr. Ninja!" she cried with relief. "Set it on the table," she asked him, as she tried to control the animal.

Sasuke did. And he tore open the packet and poured the pellets in. "Do you wish me to light them for you, Miss Akane Tendo?"

"Yes, Mr. Ninja -No, wait! I need the lozenge in its hidden drawer."

"Hidden drawer?" After feeling around for it, he found the latch that kept the spring from opening the small drawer. Inside was what looked like a piece of candy. Though one that was a dark, disgusting looking green. It left no appeal for anybody to put it in their mouth.

Meanwhile, Madame St. Paul was arguing with the referee. "I demand you disqualify zis simple adolescent - Again! She is making ze _moquerie_ of ze elegance of etiquette!"

Headmaster Kuno remembered the eyes of Kasumi and the unspeakable calm she could inflict on his troubled mind. "Must say, the Young Lady has a right to her own techniques. And I would consider the pig the right handicap for your benefit, what?"

She glared at the lunatic and knew it would be a waste to argue with the referee.

Instead, she turned her attention to the food on the table. She, Madame St. Paul, would begin the competition _now!_

Flash! Flash! Flash!

But before she could, the woman obsessed with etiquette felt compelled to put each and every thing on the table back in their proper position. Besides, with the speed of her tongue, it wouldn't take long.

Akane held Burin-chan up to her shoulder, patting it to keep it calm, but also to remind him what a strong hold she had on it. She didn't want Ryoga to get lost in the crowd, or worse, the poor little thing.

 _And_ thinking on this helped to take her mind off the flavor of the lozenge. It was acrid with the taste of the incense, but it also had the mix of all other flavors mushed together, like chocolate ice cream and sardines and maple syrup and natto! Even being on center stage with the pig instead of her _Romeo_ wasn't becoming enough of a distraction from it!

No! She _had to_ keep it in her mouth! She _had to_ compete! She _had to_ prove to everybody she _Was_ a martial artist! She _could_ endure

She took the deep-breath of the martial artist marshaling all of her energy and resolve!

The incense from the burner mixed with the food. Then, responding to the lozenge, it was drawn back towards it - and it took the food with it! The solid food had become just their aromas! The scent of incense brought with it the whiff of the hors-d'oeuvres, the fragrance of the soup, the bouquet of the chicken medley, the stink of the cheese, the perfume of the coffee - _All at the same time!_ Not _just_ the smell, but the pure, concentrated flavors separated out and contrasted one against the others! It was enough to make anybody less determined than Akane puke!

The miasmas rose off the plates, the bowls, the platters, and the tureens!

" _Mon Dieu!_ Ze Fine Dining technique of ze Taoists! Ze secret of zeir Sages! I of Occidental France cannot be outclassed by ze Oriental school!" Her tongue whipped out, snapping this way and that to gather the different colored clouds! She was so anxious, though, she forgot etiquette and allowed her saliva to run along the length of her tongue and be flung about in slobber!

Her spit, too, became part of the fume entering Akane's nose!

She mustn't gag! She mustn't puke! Whatever happened, she Must, Not, Lose, the lozenge!

In one last desperate gambit, Madame St, Paul tried to suck the remaining mists, she shaped her mouth into a great straw!

The audience gasped! Others screamed! "Monster!" some cried!

[][][]

"Oh, my! She has let the cat out of the bag, hasn't she(?)!"

"Kasumi?(?)" Ranma asked. She had come back?

But, wait, that wasn't her voice. Ranma turned to see who was sitting next to her.

It was an oddly costumed man with a staff, his hair in a bob cut. He had the air of a traveler long on the road, something Ranma was quite familiar with. "Who are you?"

With a mischievous gleam in his eye, the squinty man said to her. "People call me, Xelloss."

"What are _you_ doing here in the ring?!"

" _That_ , is a secret," he said with an enigmatic smile.

Ranma wasn't watching as Akane puked, but she heard her do it!

"Akane!" she cried, rushing to her.

"I say! Terribly, terribly bad show! No elegance at all! Akane Tendo is declared the loser!" the referee announced.

"Akane?" Ranma held her bent over friend by her shoulders. "Akane, I'm so sorry! It must be-"

"Here! Take it!" Akane handed her the lozenge she had rescued. "Put it in your mouth! You must _not_ let the _Anything-Goes_ School lose!"

[][][]

Kasumi had found a hidden spot where no one could or would be able to see her.

Bowing her head, she clapped two times and put her hands together in prayer. "All-Father, Kami-sama, who is most at home in the Constellations of the North Star, hear my call!

"Let my Guardian Angel sing her song of praise! Emerge, Holly Belle! Let your beauty be revealed!"

The presence just on the edge of human awareness became one with Kasumi's aura...and from there collected the light of this plane of reality to take the shape of an angel, with long, elegant feathers spreading out from her wings, a white, loose halter top and a long white skirt that morphed into a heavenly cloud that Kasumi herself shared.

The eldest daughter of Soun Tendo parted her hands and followed Holly Bell's as they both began to sing a wordless hymn of unearthly harmony and beauty!

[][][]

Akane had Ryoga in a firm hug. And Ranma had Akane in a firm hug, as she stood behind her. Ranma was now not fighting for her own pride, she was fighting for their school's. But even more important, she was fighting for her friend's!

With the lozenge firmly in the redhead's mouth, once again, all that could be humanly consumed became one with the air, shifting the very wind to blow the pall towards her. And, like Akane, Ranma discovered how even the best of flavors could become vile when their very earthy essences were smelled all at once! And that was trying to discount the puke that was _also_ in the blend!

But Ranma had had a hard life! Time and again, she had had to eat whatever was available, things even she would not stomach unless she was forced to by hunger! She had _practice_ tasting disgusting, revolting things! She even almost liked natto!

And soon - but not soon enough as far as _she_ was concerned! - all of the food was gone!

And she had not opened her mouth once.

She, her school, and Akane had won.

And so the referee declared.

And Madame St. Paul hung her head in defeat.

The bell was rung.

Bell? What bell? They had not used a bell in this match.

The iron corset Ranma was wearing was ringing, resonating with another sound. The sound gave her corset an unearthly but very beautiful tone. The ringing was harmonic and almost musical. The bell seemed... _holy_.

"This is where you part comes in," said the man who people called Xelloss. His hand was on one of her shoulders. "You remind me of Lina Inverse, so I am sure you are capable of vanquishing the monsters inhabiting the bodies of those others who are wearing iron corsets."

"They really _are_ monsters?!"

"Now, do you _really_ think humans can deform their mouths and tongues as they can? Or eat faster than the human eye can follow?

"But, no. They are only the humans the monsters are, if you'll pardon the expression, 'living' in. But they _could_ become monsters unless you save them."

Somehow, Ranma thought she could trust this Xelloss character. The music vibrating her whole body to the bone told her that she should. "Okay. What do I do?!"

"It is all a matter of will. Do you have the will of a hero to vanquish the enemy of humanity and all beings on this plane of existence? Can you shift the very north polar axis of the world and set this world spinning on its proper course?"

"You Bet I CAN! I'm Ranma Saotome!" Her own will increased the volume of the bell music.

But that wasn't enough! She hit her belly against the inside of the corset. She adjusted and adjusted again the beat, relying on her trained senses to find the right feel!

And the holy music gained a rhythm! A very human rhythm, full of syncopation!

And the iron corsets of the _le Belle de la France_ School began resonating with _Ranma's_ corset! Their corsets had not before because they did not have the link to _Holy Purity_ as Ranma had. And now, the martial artist was passing it along to the monsters through their link with their human hosts!

Theirs had a competing, far less musical sound to their bell rings. There was a clash of dissonance and disharmony!

The audience covered their ears. Some screamed to hide behind their own wall of noise. Some tried to run away from it!

"Don't forget the static electricity," Xelloss advised.

While continuing to beat her belly against the corset, she also found a way to rub her belly against it!

But how could she generate enough electricity to open up the pathway to Heaven the Taoist Sages and the shamen used?! How strong a bolt of lightning could _she_ possibly give Kami-sama?!

"Allow me," Xellos said, touching his staff to her bodice,

FLASH!

In a scream of pain, the misshapen monsters that had been inside Madame St. Paul, Chance Gamblers, and Picolet Chardin III rose up out of their hosts' bodies!

Yelling vows of vengeance on Xelloss, they shifted out of this universe and into the alternative universe they belonged, one where they did not need human hosts.

"Well done, Ranma Saotome! And you did it without the Blast Bomb or the Laguna Blade spell Lina Inverse uses! Of course, she, _too_ , has to use a talisman to accomplish those.

"Well, I must join my fellow monsters in that other world." And he, too, began to fade.

"Will I ever see you again?!"

"Now, _that_ , is a secret," he smiled.

[][][] [][][] [][][]

I apologize for the spoiler on Xelloss. He became a major character in the _Slayers_ , While, as a monster and servant of more powerful monsters, he is dedicated to Chaos - literally! - he seems to have his own agenda. Hmm, that sounds like the magic of Ranma's Jusenkyo curse.

The same actress that voiced Kasumi also voiced Belldandy of _Ah, My Goddess_. The two characters are often compared in fan fictions that I have read. In my interpretation, Holly Bell(e) is the true, consistent form, and Belldandy is just the goddess form that ages, dies and is reborn time and again. Kasumi is one of Holy Belle's _human_ forms. Belldandy has a goddess brain, Kasumi a girl brain.

And, if you know anything about _Belldandy's_ sisters, the answer is _yes_ , that's how I view Nabiki and Akane, too. But, no, there is not a one-to-one match between the pairs of sisters and their abilities of _Future, Present,_ and _Past_. These are showcased in _The Great Curse,_ my _very First_ fan fiction - and written long before I knew of the Norn sisters - which I intend to rework and publish one day.


	19. Chapter 21 Hello, I'm Nodoka

icAn unusual disclaimer: Ranma ½ is a trademark of Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ Communications, and its characters have been borrowed without permission. And Son Turned Daughter was originally written way back in 2002 by the FanFiction author Tangent, and his characters Megumi, Yasushi and Ayane have, likewise, been borrowed without permission. Please see the first two chapters of this story under his pen name. This story is written for non-commercial purposes only.

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Asuka Saginomiya is not found in the anime, but she _is_ found in the manga. Her servant is my character.

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Their monsters gone, Madame St. Paul collapsed, Chance Gamblers collapsed, Picolet Chardin III collapsed. Asuka Saginomiya did not collapse.

She coldly looked down on Picolet, lying unconscious on the wrestling mat.

She rose from her seat. She stood there, waiting.

A little, stout womanly apparition appeared from out beneath the tablecloth! She was swift and silent, her costume was chameleon, changing colors with each new background (or so it seemed). Coming to her Mistress, she took the bouquet of white lilies from her, and put them in their holder attached to the lower back of Asuka's dress, and, those not being enough of a complement of her mistress's beauty, she added yet more lilies from out of nowhere. And once her mistress had her peacock tail of flowers, she gave her the ornate frame to finish the job of making her picture perfect!

Grasping the frame tightly in her hands, threatening to break it as her hands wanted to become fists, Asuka Saginomiya, T _omorrow's Beauty, the Fake Princess_ , commanded, "Show yourself, Kodachi Kuno! I know you are the one who defeated my date!"

She waited for her rival to answer. But not for long, "Answer me, Kodachi! You cannot claim to win a challenge unless you make a personal appearance!"

[][][]

Ranma was still on the high of victory! Her body still tingled from the fading vibrations the resonance had given her iron corset. Her nipples and other parts of her body were aroused, but the pure holiness and her own still almost dormant sexual awareness did not allow for base thoughts.

"I did it! I _Ranma Saotome_ , beat the monsters! I sent them back to the other world they came from! And I won the Fine Dining challenge! I don't have to marry Chardin! And I beat Nabiki! I won the _whole_ bet! I set up a rival school!"

" _You set up_ a rival school!" Akane cried. "Hello! _I'm the one_ who remembered the Nasty Awful Candy!"

Burin-chan leaped from her arms and whapped Ranma in the head with its front hooves! It landed on the table and was prepared to knock some appreciation into his frenemy's head again.

"Hey!" the redhead cried, her moment spoiled.

"Akane!" , "Akane!" her friends Sayuri and Yuka yelled, scrambling past the ropes and into the ring. "You did it! You did it!"

" _I_ did it!" Ranma tried to tell them.

"Ranma!" , "Ranma!" her friends Makoto and Shikako yelled, scrambling from the other set of stairs into the ring. "You did it! You did it!"

"I did, didn't I!" she was about to brag.

But seeing Akane's frustrated hurt and anger, she said, "We did it, Akane and me." Then to Mr. Tendo and everybody, "We did for the _Anything-Goes_ School!"

"Oh, Ranma!" It was almost enough for her to forgive her. Then, to her friends, she explained, "I was looking for a leash for Burin-chan in our attic when I saw the incense burner. It made me remember the Nasty Awful Candy I had found in it as a kid. My dad explained why I shouldn't throw it out. It was part of his master's collection of anything-goes techniques. It was for breathing food through your nose."

"Yes, indeed," Mr. Tendo said, having come to congratulate the students of the _Anything-Goes_ School. "The Taoist Sages believed one could win immortality by withstanding the wretched taste."

"I'm immortal(!)?!" Ranma smiled.

"Yes, you very well could be. All you have to do is eat no more solid food for four times four years."

"I have to breathe everything through my nose? Using only _that_ Nasty Awful Candy? Bleah!" Out came her tongue and the lozenge. She picked it off her tongue and threw it into its drawer. Then slammed it shut!

[][][]

While those dressed in uniforms that looked like a cross between waitresses and nurses attended to the _la Belle France_ School, Asuka posed for those of the local populace who wanted to take pictures of her. But mere adulation of ordinary boys was not good enough for her.

"Where is Kodachi Kuno?!" She demanded to know.

"Kodachi isn't here," Yasushi said.

"She must still be recovering from Romeo's kiss!" Akiko said with a big smile.

"It seems like Akane Tendo and Ranma Saotome have a rival for Romeo," the gossip, Ayane, grinned.

"Kodachi has a boyfriend(!)?!" Asuka cried in horror. The frame bent as she struggled _not_ to break it.

"You _did_ see Romeo kiss Kodachi?" Ayane asked Akiko.

"And WHAT a kiss! Wow! _I_ could feel it! _Everybody_ in the shop could feel it!"

"Kodachi was kissed passionately _in public!_ " Asuka cried but quietly in outrage.

"It was even better than the kiss he gave to Akane!"

The platinum blonde was already on the move. And she made sure everybody near the table in the wrestling ring saw her best side behind the frame. "Whose boyfriend _is_ Romeo?!"

"Romeo is my daughter Akane's fiance!" Soun Tendo proudly announced into the microphone he had grabbed from Sasuke.

"Dad! We have a _year_ before we decide!" Akane yelled in embarrassment.

"Yeah! That's right!" Ranma backed her up.

"Then Kodachi can still claim him as her boyfriend!" It wasn't a question.

"Kodachi and me-Romeo!? Her boyfriend!?" Ranma's fingers went up in the warding gesture.

"Where does Romeo live?!" Asuka demanded.

"Uh…." , Ranma looked at Akane. "Uh…." Akane looked at Ranma.

Lucky for them, Sasuke had taken the microphone away from Mr. Tendo and given it to Nabiki. "Romeo is a martial artist and takes frequent training trips. He _does_ visit his step-sister, Ranma, even though Mr. Saotome does not like it."

Man, Nabiki _doesn't_ lie! Ranma had to admit. Unless, of course, you count the lie of omission. Which, of course, she didn't. If she did, _she_ would have to count _herself_ as a liar.

"You, with the red hair and pigtail, you are Ranma?" And with that she turned and left them, her servant holding up a picture mounting board so her bad side, her back side, was not seen.

"What was that about?" Ranma asked. "Who is she?"

"She knows Kodachi Kuno," Akane, and then the others, turned the referee, her father.

But the Headmaster was already gone.

[][][]

Those of the _la Belle France_ School would recover, but they would not be okay. Not from their perspective, as their waitresses and waiters found out. Though they tried, the mouths and the tongues of the _Gourmands_ no longer stretched. If anything, they were _less_ than normal human size.

The _Anything-Goes_ School were the hometown favorite, so the locals insisted they be treated to a festival. They wouldn't take no for an answer. The winners wanted to change out of the stupid dresses they had been forced to wear. The locals wanted them to remain in the winning "uniforms".

Makoto, Shikako, Sayuri, and Yuka were proud to be seen with their best friends, Ranma and Akane. Even Kikuko and Ryonami could claim some reflected glory, after all, hadn't Nabiki also competed? And she was correct in saying she _had_ been the probe that had determined how their monstrous technique had worked.

Adding Akiko, Umeko, and Emiko from the Date Management Club and there wasn't really room for anybody else in the _2nd Branch_ Okonomiyaki restaurant that Ikuko's mom ran. Especially since three of the crowd were in hoop-skirts.

"Does anybody know where my pet pig, Burin-chan is? No? Oh, he must have gotten lost again!"

"I wish Big Sister could be here with us," girl Ranma said. That didn't stop her from eating her Japanese pizza. But Akane thought it was affecting her appetite, as the redhead was eating more like the girls around her. She _still had_ a "healthy" appetite, though.

"Kasumi should be happy with dad and the other grownups at the Bathhouse Cafe," Akane assured her.

"Bathhouse Cafe?" Ranma asked.

"It used to be a bathhouse before it became a restaurant," said Ikuko, their expert on business. "They specialize in steamed food."

"A place for a hot bath(!)?" Ranma smiled. " _And_ eats?!"

"It stopped being a bathhouse over a century ago. The water level of the natural hot spring got so low, they had to rebuild until it was in the basement. Then they gave up on it and made the floor above into the cafe."

"Oh." It didn't sound like it was something the redhead could use in an emergency.

"Asuka Saginomiya…" Sayuri said. And said it again. "I know I know her name."

"Lizard Kindergarten!" Akiko said, remembering.

" _HER!?_ " others, too, remembered.

"Who is she, then?" Akane asked. "I don't remember her, and I went there, too."

"That must have been the time when you went to, uh..." Yuka said.

"Ryugenzawa," Makoto said, "a mysterious valley deep in the wilderness of Japan."

"That's _right!_ " And Shikako stared at Akane, "You never _did_ tell us why it's "mysterious", Akane."

"Asuka?! Let's stay with her," Ikuko said. "I sense danger from her. _Who_ is she? My family hadn't come to Nerima, yet."

"Let's see...It all began with, uh…."

"Just call him A-ko," Makoto, his sister frowned, "But it was the _teacher_ who started it!"

"At playtime, she told the boys to hold the hands of one of the girls," Shikako said.

"Asuka became angry that the best-looking boy chose Kodachi!"

"That's right! She got the next-best looking boy in class-"

"Just call him B-ko," Shikako, _his_ sister, told them.

"Things got out of hand - Fast!" , "Asuka challenged Kodachi!" , "It was what they called a _double-date duel!_ " , " _They_ didn't attack each other!" , "No, they had to go and attack my- A-ko!" , "And B-ko!" , "It was _horrible!_ " , "B-ko…" , "And A-ko…" , "...still are not over the trauma of it!"

"Two little girls beat up two little boys?" Ranma asked.

"Badly!" Shikako said. "Asuka is a bad person!" Makoto said.

"Asuka's family moved away," Akiko said.

"But no boy wanted to be Kodachi's boyfriend again," Makoto said.

" _That's right!?_ " Sayuri remembered, to her horror.

"Akane! Akane!" Yuka said, tears welling up in her eyes. "That's the reason Kodachi chose _you_ to be _Romeo_."

Second only to the death of her mom, that was the biggest trauma in her life, and it wasn't _only_ caused by Kodachi?! Akane had somebody _else_ to hate! "Ranma…."

"Yes, Akane. No dating her, either."

Of course, this became something else to add to the rumors about Ranma (and Akane).

[][][]

The hoop-skirted Nabiki had held her tongue and waited. It wasn't until she was with just Akane and Ranma that she asked the question, "Do you care to know what happened to "A-ko" and "B-ko"?"

"No." , "Not really."

Where was the fun of not telling them? "You know them. "B-ko" is Shikako's twin brother, but he is hardly her twin, anymore. He turned to food for his comfort. Now, he's the President of the Sumo Club.

"You remember seeing Akane beat him up during the attacks of the hentai horde?"

"Ranma, used him as a trampoline," Akane frowned at the memory of the redhead's second day at school.

"And Makoto's brother, the best-looking and coolest guy is hardly that today. Even in kindergarten, the Black Rose and White Lily were using exploding flowers! "A-ko" is now the nerd President of the Chemistry and Explosives Club."

"Do I know him?" Ranma asked.

"That day you ate lunch with Hiroshi? He tried to get a date with you," Akane said.

"But his name isn't the same as Makoto's. Is it?"

"You should _know_ about step-brothers, _Romeo_ ," Nabiki smirked.

Ranma's martial arts training put two and two together. "Being around all her brother's chemicals and explosives have made her nose sensitive. It _has_ to be, to help protect her!" She frowned. Makoto was becoming one of her closer friends! Like Shikako! "Kodachi and Asuka have not only wrecked Akane's life but other friends of mine, too!"

"That's right!" Akane, too, began to burn for justice. "Why didn't _you_ tell me this before, Nabiki?!"

"I did. But _you_ covered your ears and said things like, " I'm not listening! I won't believe you!", etcetera."

"She'll listen _now_ , won't you Akane!" It was not a question. Ranma would make sure she did.

Akane felt her power to deny crumbling. "I'm no longer Romeo." And she smiled at her. "You are."

The Miracle continued.

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It was one of the unwritten rules of Nerima that even the best of friends had to stay at least a block away from each other's homes, same-block friends excepted, of course, unless they had a very good reason to visit. So, they found it a surprise when they saw a woman, a stranger, waiting outside the Tendo gate. Just as Ranma, Akane, and Nabiki were wearing clothes whose style belonged to the 19th century, so was she. But where theirs were Western in origin, hers was Eastern, and quite Japanese, at that. Unlike theirs, it was still seen sometimes in daily life. She had on a homongi, a semi-formal visiting kimono of married women.

"There's something vaguely familiar about her," Nabiki said, sizing her up.

"You're right," Akane agreed. "Do you think that's her natural hair color?"

"If anybody has unnaturally red hair, it's our cursed girl, Ranma."

But the pigtailed girl told them, "Be careful. She's carrying a sword, a nodachi, I think, under that silk."

"Let me do the talking," Nabiki advised them. "Hello, I and my sister live here."

"And I'm staying here," Ranma added.

"You are the Tendos? ...And, _you_ are the girl with the same name as my son?"

"Your son?!"

Ranma's hand reached out. She was still too far away. "Are you really my mom?"

"No. I am sorry, but I'm not your mother, dear. I don't have a daughter. Only a son!

"A Mr. Chance told me about this Ranma. Please, tell me if you know anything about him! I've waited _ten_ years to see him again!"

"I'm your-"

Nabiki stopped her. "It's a complicated story, but your son is now calling himself Romeo." If she played the cards right, by delaying the inevitable, she might discover information she could profit from.

"Romeo? Not Ranma?" She looked at the pigtailed girl, "Why are you called _Ranma_? That's an unusual name for a girl."

"Uh, well, why don't we go inside and talk about this more comfortably," Akane said, desperate to buy time. Her more intelligent sister seemed to think they should hold off telling the whole truth. And she hadn't told the whole truth about Ranma since she revealed it to her and her family. Maybe, a white half-lie could spare Ranma's mom unnecessary pain.

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Kasumi and Mr. Tendo were not home, yet. Ranma was the last to enter. She wanted to see her mom, even if it was from the back. Why were Akane and Nabiki trying to stop her from telling her _own_ mom the truth? The only reason the Tendo sisters understood her problems was _because_ she had told them the truth, and the _whole_ truths, at that! Surely her own mom deserved to know as much as these people she's only known for five days!

She _would_ tell her, "Mom,..."

"I'm not your mother, dear."

"Oh, where are our manners!" Akane swung around and bowed. "My name is Akane Tendo. And this is my middle sister." , "Nabiki" , "and my big sister, Kasumi, should be home, soon, along with our dad!" She felt so nervous.

"And, of course, you know Ranma Saotome by name," Nabiki said.

"Mom!"

"Ranma misses her mom!" Like Akane still missed hers.

"Yes. She has been removed from her life for several years, now," Nabiki strongly implied that the redhead's mother was now dead. And come to think of it, if she avoided Ranma's name, it was true that the _redhead's_ mother was dead, some 1,500 years gone, in fact.

"Oh, you poor, dear. Alright. If it makes you feel better, you may call me "Mom". I _have_ waited ten years to be called that, again. Though I would've preferred it had been my son who called me that first."

"Mom!" She cried! Cried like a girl, so moved was she to able to say that, at long last!

She had the great urge to hug her mom, but remembered the iron corset she still wore. It would spoil the intimacy of their first contact.

"Oh, where are my manners! You have introduced yourselves by name. I should tell you mine."

They were now before the open kitchen door. Akane reached around the Ranma's mom, and pulled her in front of her. Tears were still coming down her cheeks.

"My name is Nodoka Saotome, wife of Genma Saotome," she said, bowing with her sword. "Do you know where he is, as well?"

"Uh…, not exactly," Akane said.

"Come, let's go into the common room and talk," Nabiki said.

"The common room? Not the formal living room?" It would be more appropriate for the kimono she had on.

"There's no room in there," Akane said.

"Yeah. It's full of boxes." Ranma _was_ about to tell her mom they were full of girls' clothes and lingerie. She stopped herself. It _did_ remind her just how much she _didn't_ look like what her mom expected her to look like. She was wearing a hoop-skirt with petticoats and pantaloons! And the tops of her boobs were showing!

The common room was just out of view of the corner they turned.

They were met by a swirling storm of black petals!

"Kodachi!" Akane and Ranma angrily said, seeing the girl in her leotards near the always open shoji doors, whipping them up with a long gymnast-ribbon.

And, there, tossing black roses from the bouquet he held, was the ninja, Sasuke.

"Ohohoho!" She laughed one of the worst, and therefore one of the "best", Noblewoman's annoying laugh. "I understand, Asuka, the White Lily, knows about Romeo! I have come to warn him of my childhood nemesis!"

"Romeo? My, uh, son?" Nodoka asked. Was _she_ the reason her son wasn't using his real name? But why was this pigtailed girl using it?

"You are my Darling Romeo's mother(!)?!" The ribbon fell, and so did the petals.

"O-Mother-san!" Kodachi bowed. "I am your son's fiancee."

"You are not!" both Ranma and Akane cried.

"She isn't?" Things were getting more and more confusing for her.

"Kodachi _doesn't_ have a betrothal contract," Nabiki said. "But we, the Tendos, do."

"What is a mere piece of paper compared to _True Love!_ "

"True love?"

"Yes! The moment he kissed me, I _knew_ we were destined to be man and wife!"

"My son kissed you!"

"Hey! Romeo kissed _Me_ first!" Akane told her. "He did it in front of the _entire school_ , out on a stage at the playing field!"

"Oh, my! That does seem, unseemly! A kiss should not be so public."

"Was it as passionate as the one Romeo gave me in the women's apparel shop(!)?!"

"My son was in women's apparel?"

"Yes, Romeo's mother, Ma'am," Sasuke said. "And he was _wearing_ women's apparel. Lingerie."

"My _Son was wearing lingerie(!)?!_ "

"Nothing Romeo wears can take away from his manliness!" Kodachi sighed.

"There's a good explanation!" Akane tried to assure Ranma's mom.

"So, my manly son thinks it is acceptable to kiss _two_ girls in public and to wear women's clothes." The silk wrapping her sword began to slip.

"He _was_ wearing tights and trunks when he kissed Miss Akane," Sasuke said, trying to be helpful.

"It was the costume from _Romeo and Juliet_ \- a play!" Akane yelled to be heard.

"So, when my son kissed you, it was just an act?" More of the sword was revealed.

"It WASN'T an act! It was Real! It was both of ours First Kiss!"

"And _his_ was My First Kiss, as well!" Kodachi pointed the handle of her ribbon at her, threateningly. "My first with a man."

"You kiss women as well?"

"Yes!" Kodachi said unapologetically. "But I gave my last away," her ribbon turned to, "her! In fact, she _stole_ that kiss!"

"Oh, my, so you are a-"

"Miss Ranma also kissed a Mikado Sanzenin." Again, Sasuke was trying to be helpful. "And, my, was that passionate. It literally blew his mind."

"Uh…." Ranma tried to think of what to tell her mom. Oh! How about the truth, "He had this spell! He was usin' it to get kisses from girls!"

"So, it was only because of this spell that you kissed him?"

"No! I kissed him to _stop_ him from kissin' girls! I broke his spell because I…." Ack! Because she was too much of a guy!

"Because you do not like kissing men?" Nodoka lifted an eyebrow.

"Uh…." Ranma hung her head in defeat. It was true. Maybe. Please, don't let the curse win by making her _like_ kissing guys!

"But that was the same reason she kissed Kodachi!" Akane came to her "rescue". "She kissed her to _stop_ her from kissing women!"

"She did it because she was jealous! She wishes _she_ could kiss as many as the Black Rose has kissed!"

"Oh, this _is_ confusing," Sasuke said, not Nodoka. "Rumor has it that both Miss Ranma and Miss Akane is interested in Romeo."

"Well?" Nodoka turned to the two.

"Well, this has all been very interesting," a new voice said.

Looking for it, they saw a large framed portrait leaning up against the wall opposite the shoji doors.

"Asuka!" Kodachi said. "I had _assumed_ that was an ugly painting she gave to try and win Romeo over to _her!_

"Me, want Romeo?" The White Lily said, standing up from the chair her servant girl had brought with her. "I do not date womanizers."

"Oh, my! My son does sound like a womanizer."

"The what _are_ you doing in my house(!)?!" Akane yelled.

"It's quite simple. I came to kill Romeo." She stepped out of the picture frame.

"But since he is not here, I shall leave." And she did, heading for the front door.

"Oh, my! My son killed? That's what happens to womanizers."

"I, too, must leave, o-mother-san," Kodachi bowed. "I must follow Asuka and discover _her_ boyfriend. I must kill _hers_ before she kills mine!"

[][][]

"Asuka wanting to kill your son. _There's_ a good reason for Romeo to not be around," Nabiki said.

"He's hiding? That seems cowardly." More of her sword showed. What blade showed gleamed.

"Ran-Romeo is _No_ coward! I'm gonna _tell_ you-"

"-Why the sword?!" Akane yelled.

"We're home!" Kasumi announced.

"The Merchants have presented us with items for defeating the monsters!" her father announced.

"Monsters!?" And the silk entirely fell to the floor.

On seeing the sword, Soun dropped all of the things he was carrying.

[][][]

After the introductions, they were all sitting around the common room table, Soun Tendo at the head, Nodoka Saotome at the other end.

"I shall get Uncle Saotome," Kasumi said, smiling.

"Yes," the woman said sternly. "I _would_ like to see my husband again." Her sword was still unwrapped, and she was making motions as if she intended, perhaps, to use it.

"Heh. heh. Why the sword?" Ranma said, though she suspected she wouldn't like the answer.

"I carry it to remind me of _why_ I agreed to allow my husband, Genma, to take my son away on the training journey to manhood. We all three, Myself, Genma and my son, Ranma, signed a contract ten years ago. Unless my son returns as a _man-among-men_ , they must commit seppuku. And I am honor-bound to be the second and use this sword to deliver the final death strike."

Ranma was not the only one to nearly faint and topple onto the floor.

"Uh, Mrs. Saotome," Soun tried to reason with her, "Genma and I have a contract, as well. Your son is to wed one of my daughters and produce an heir that will unite our two schools. It has precedent, as it was made _before_ your child was born."

"Yes," Nabiki said, "you can kill them _after_ he and my little sister has had their baby. And a second one, in case something happens to the first."

"Honor must always take precedent! Though my husband is from peasant stock, I come from a samurai family! Honor must win no matter the consequences." And she seemed resolute in following that principle.

"Come on, Uncle Saotome. Come and meet your wife."

"No, Kasumi, you don't understand!" Genma cried. But the slender woman had his ear in a pressure lock. He _had_ to follow her.

"Genma!" Nodoka screamed, rising with her sword ready.

"No!" Ranma cried, rising up to protect his no-good pop. "Mom! _I'm_ Ranma! I'm your son! I been cursed to be a girl!"

Nodoka's samurai tradition overwhelmed her! Before she knew what she was doing, _she used_ their _sword of honor!_

It struck her one and only child!

And snapped! Her heritage broke on an iron corset.

The mother collapsed and sobbed great cries of shame! She had almost killed her somebody! A girl with hair as red as her in her own teen years. And just because she claimed to be her son. "Oh, Ranma! Ranma! I miss you! Please, return to me!" Her body shook with grief. In that moment of truth, when her sword had struck to kill, she actually _had_ thought she was killing her one and only child.

The girl in Ranma knew exactly what to do. She dropped to her knees and embraced her, hugging her tightly to her, rubbing her back and short red hair. "Mom, it's okay...it's okay. I'm okay. I'm not dead. I have returned. I have my mom back…."

And this went on for nearly a half an hour. But that was okay. Ranma found comfort in comforting her mother.

"Is it you…? Is it really you, Ranma?" Nodoka asked, again and again, reaching out to touch the face. She knew that face. It was so like the face in old photographs. It was the face a daughter of hers would have had. If she ever had had a daughter.

[][][]

Nobody, not even Soun, would let Genma escape. He was forced to face his wife.

Meanwhile. Ranma left to change out of the pantaloons, petticoats, hoop-skirt, and dress. And, of course, her miracle iron corset. The hairline crack had become wider and longer. She could wear it again if she had to, but it would not be able to take much more abuse. As long as she was allowed to keep it, she would. It would be something her life on the road and its need to take only the essentials had never allowed her to have. It would be her first momento, something that brought up treasured memories. And, to her, this one was almost...holy.

By the time he had returned to wearing her Chinese outfit, the others had explained to her mother how her son and husband had become cursed.

"I _should_ bring out one of the family tanto daggers and have you commit seppuku, husband."

Genma took a glass of water and poured it on himself. It then held up a sign, [You wouldn't want to see a panda die?]

"They _are_ an endangered species."

"Mom," the pigtailed girl said.

Nodoka turned to her. The redhead was no longer wearing clothes of a girl, but ones a tomboy would wear. "Ranma."

"Kasumi?"

"I have the teakettle of hot water, here, Ranma."

Nabiki gasped! So upset with her husband, seeing him change into a panda had not yet really registered. But the disappearance of the redhead reminded her how close her younger self had almost disappeared permanently.

And yet, "Ranma!" she cried, rushing to her feet to embrace her manly son!

"Ah, geez! Mom," but he accepted her hug, and even, lightly, placed his hands on her body. He was tall, now. He placed his cheek softly on her head. "Mom." He did not cry, but he was filled with the longed-for joy of knowing his nearly forgotten mom. She was so small and fragile. He was so big and strong. He would never let her hurt again. "Mom, I'm never gonna leave you again."

[][][]

Long minutes later that went by too quickly, and mother and child were sitting beside each other at the Tendo table.

"I'm so happy for you two." Kasumi's smile was more radiant than ever.

"Even I have been moved," Nabiki smiled without a trace of amusement.

"Where's Akane?" the male Ranma asked.

"She rushed off crying to her room, again," Nabiki said.

"She…. We all miss our own mother," Kasumi said. "She was a wonderful mother."

"Yeah," Ranma said, looking at his own. "Mothers are wonderful."

"See, Genma!?" Soun grinned in good cheer and relief. "All your worries were for nothing! You and your wife are reunited, and you three are now a family again!"

Then he hid his eyes in his arm and sobbed. "I wish _my_ wonderful wife were here with me and her family!"

Genma was unmoved. He knew his hell would begin when he was alone with Nodoka. _He knew_ the terror of the woman! He knew it so well, he had had to escape it, ten years ago. And, now, it had returned to his life. Oh, why - why! - had he _have to_ be practicing Umi-Sen Ken in _her_ parents' house! She had even kept its scroll as a _memento!_

If only he had married Sakura! Better, Kimiko, the woman he _really_ loved. But, no. She was already married. To Soun.

"So, please, tell me about your adventures, Son! I want to know _everything_ I missed!"

"I really hadn't had many before I moved here. -Oh! Man! Geez!"

"What?! What's wrong, Son! Tell me, please!"

"I've been here only five days and I've had almost more adventures than I had in my whole life, not countin' my two weeks in China after I got cursed. Five days!

"Akane! I have to go and tell Akane!"

"I'll go get her, Ranma," Kasumi said. "May I ask why you want her?"

"It was _her_ that saw it! The truth about my curse! I want everybody to know who did! She's...my friend."

Nodoka's hand went on top of her son's. "I'm glad you have found a friend. I hope it can develop into...something more."

Genma grimaced at the glance she shot at him. Oh, yes. There would be hell to pay.

"Personally, I don't believe those "somethings" work out when based on friendship," Nabiki said. "It would make things, uh, "awkweird". You have to choose one or the other. Choose friendship and you lose eroticism. The couple has to stoop to playing role games. And pretending _can_ get tiring. It's not really passion."

"There are always exceptions," Nodoka said.

Genma agreed with Nabiki. The one thing that had always overcome their differences was the physical attraction they had felt for one another.

But did he have that for her anymore? He hadn't been much attracted to his son, and his cursed form was practically a duplicate of Nodoka in her younger days. _Were_ they still aroused by the sight of their naked bodies? They would find out when they were alone. And then the hell would begin again, Genma thought, his performance anxiety growing even then.

"Eroticism? I'm not sure what that is, and I don't think I care to know."

Good for you, Son! Genma applauded himself in his mind. He hadn't wanted _his_ son to be put through what Nodoka had done to him! Not after the overdose of perversion he had had with his old master, the Founder of _Anything-Goes_ Martial Arts! Far before his heir was aware of the opposite sex, he had isolated him as much as he could from them. He had trained into Ranma until it was conditioned into him and, so, difficult to break, the Collected Techniques of _Warrior's Chastity_!

It was only when he had fled to Soun and _had to_ have Ranma married to prove his manliness to Nodoka that he realized the flaw in the _Warrior's Chastity_. But when the time came, he would reassure them all that _he_ had thought of the solution! Thank the kami they lived in the modern age. Artificial insemination would produce the heir to their schools, and his son would _still_ remain a virgin!

"I'd rather have a friend," Ranma said.

"You would?" Akane said.

"Akane!" Ranma smiled up at her.

Nodoka saw the smile and herself smiled. "You say that Ranma has only been here for five days?"

"You could say it was friendship at first sight," Akane said.

"Second," Ranma said. "I remember everybody bein' scared spitless at seein' a panda in their house."

"And the confusion," Nabiki added. "We were all expecting Ranma to be a guy." She teased him by making "poit, poit" motions with her finger.

Nodoka turned to Genma, "You couldn't wait until _after_ you were a man and a son?!"

"Well, Nodoka, Sweetheart, it was raining," Genma fumbled around for an explanation, totally intimidated. "You _know_ what happens when we martial artists have to take too much from the _ki_ reservoir. Ranma was becoming more of a girl!"

"I _started_ becomin' a girl when you yanked me away from that amazon village and made me run like a _girl!_ I was still mostly _me_ until then!"

"You have been _quite_ naughty, I see."

Genma threw his arms over his head and cowered. There! His wife had said it! She couldn't _wait_ to get alone with him! The more she discovered just how "Naughty" he had been, the more she would be aroused by _Her_ _Bad Boy_! Again, she would be the rebel against her family and class!

And, yet, not!

Oh, the righteous punishment she would inflict on him! She would make it go on for hours! She would not let him say _Enough!_ She would always demand more! She would _drain him_ of his precious energy!

And then...and then, when his food-generated energy was low and he had to go to the _ki_ reservoir, there would be…. _No!_ A _worse_ HELL!

"Ranma!" Genma cried out. "You're coming home with me and your mother!" Maybe, he could make _sure_ he was not left alone with her!

"I am?" But, looking at her, Ranma smiled, "I am. I'm goin' home."

"Ranma…." Akane almost pleaded. But, no. It wouldn't be fair. If _she_ had the chance, she would want to be with _her_ mom. "Come back and see us. And soon."

"Of course, I will. ...Huh, where is our home, Mom?"

"Kita."

"Kita?" Ranma scratched his head. "I don't remember it."

"It's only a couple of hours walk, Ranma," Kasumi said.

"Less, I bet, the way Ranma can leap." Nabiki said.

"You should see me rooftop jump!" Ranma said proudly to them, and his mom.

"Tell me you don't practice Yama-Sen Ken, Son! Even I could not forgive him for teaching you that!"

"I don't think Pop has, Mom. He never called nothin' he taught me by that."

"That's a relief!"

"Shall we go, then, Mom?

In through the open shoji door dashed a blur, one that only trained senses would notice. Ranma was instantly up and intercepting - He caught it!

"You're Sasuke, the ninja, right?" he said.

"Romeo? You _are_ here?" Then he said with fear, "Run, Romeo! Flee!" Then he turned to the others in the room, "All of you must stay away from Romeo! You are in great danger!"

"Sasuke! You have dishonored me by revealing what I told you in secret!" It was a woman's voice. Then they saw her. She was wearing the costume of a Kuroko, all black that included the mask covering her face, There were not even eyeholes. And, worse, to Ranma, were the two cat-like "ears" on the top of the mask.

"In the name of my mistress, Asuka Saginomiya, I will kill you, too."

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SPOILER: Ranma is _not_ going to move away from Nerima! That would take the story too far away from the original!


	20. Chapter 22 Hello (and Goodbye)

An unusual disclaimer: Ranma ½ is a trademark of Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ Communications, and its characters have been borrowed without permission. And Son Turned Daughter was originally written way back in 2002 by the FanFiction author Tangent, and his characters Megumi, Yasushi and Ayane have, likewise, been borrowed without permission. Please see the first two chapters of this story under his pen name. This story is written for non-commercial purposes only.

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The kuroko are puppeteers and stagehands who appear in traditional Japanese shows. The audience does not want to be distracted from the show itself, so they learn to ignore them. This makes them 'invisible'. In Urusei Yatsura, by the same creator as Ranma ½ (by my interpretation) everybody is so conditioned to ignore them, there _are_ as good as invisible.

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C,C,C -No! She _wasn't_ a black...one of _those!_ Those _things_ don't walk on two legs! Don't talk! Man! That hood was getting to him! It was just a hood!

He had flinched! He _couldn't_ let his mom seeing him being a coward! He wouldn't even let her see him tremble!

Ranma did the unthinkable: He ripped off the mask of a kuroko!

Suddenly, a long-haired woman appeared before those of the martial artists who hadn't been paying enough attention. She was about Sasuke's own size and age.

"Romeo Saotome, what have you done!" It was Sasuke that was most surprised.

But Ranma spoke to the woman, "You made the mistake of talkin'. Kurokos don't talk."

She glared up at him, "It was because Sasuke Sarugakure _was_ my boyfriend!"

And she turned to the ninja, " _Why_ betray my trust?!"

"It was because Miss Ranma and Miss Akane showed me kindness in recognizing and speaking to me as a human being. I have never dealt with an attack like that before!" he admitted ashamedly. And, then, his voice became softer. "And because I hardly see you."

"Kuroko are not _meant_ to be seen! Even on center stage, a kuroko is at their best when ignored - Like a ninja, fool! Mistress Asuka is right, it's better to kill boyfriends!"

And she grabbed her mask.

But Ranma wouldn't let it go. "You're stayin' where everybody can see you."

Giving up the fight before it began, she became a blur of speed and ran out the open shoji doors and over the wall of the yard.

"I was right about you, Sasuke," Ranma said him. "You are a man of honor."

The short ninja put his arm up to cry into his sleeve. "That is the nicest thing anybody has said to me!"

When he blew his nose and lowered his arm, he said, "I will still have to try and kill you, if one of my masters commands of me."

"I understand. You hafta honor your Ninja Code. But you can still be a friend. Only an enemy friend."

"They're called "frenemies", Ranma," Nabiki told him.

"Really? I like opponent better. Learnin' martial arts the way I been taught, we practice intensely and it can seem like we're enemies, instead of friends." And he really hadn't been given the time to become real friends with hardly anybody. So, it was like he had more enemies than friends. It was what he was used to.

"I am honored to be your opponent, Romeo Saotome," Sasuke bowed.

He rose and said, "I must return to my masters before they know I am gone." And he, too, was gone in a blur.

"Now isn't that stupid," Nabiki said. "Honor will do that to a person."

"Honor isn't something _you_ would understand, Nabiki!" Akane told her.

"Now, Akane, your sister has more honor than she is willing to admit," Kasumi said. "For one, she refuses to lie."

"But she'll blackmail and pull dirty tricks!"

"There's dirty and there's filthy, underhanded and low," Nabiki answered.

"Hey, my mom's here!" Ranma reminded them.

"Oh, that's alright, Ranma. She sounds a lot like your father," Nodoka said, looking at her husband.

Genma only trembled at her gaze. And fought against his rising manhood.

"I'm sure Nabiki has more honor than Uncle Saotome, Aunt Saotome," Kasumi smiled warmly.

"And I'm not an idiot," Nabiki said.

"Well, Ranma, _is_ your father an idiot?" his mom asked.

Ranma had difficult saying what he really thought of his pop in front of the mother he just met.

"It's alright. I knew that when I married him. Isn't that right, Husband?"

Another something came in through the doors. Ranma automatically caught it.

It was a bouquet of white lilies(?)

"Throw!" Akane screamed! "Duck!" cried Nabiki!

Before his consciousness could, his training had flung them!

And he was following them! "Mom!" was his one thought.

They exploded before they had reached the door!

He knew the technique. But he had never tried it. It was too difficult! Too dangerous!

He used it because he _had to!_

His battle aura shot out and captured the concussive force...and brought it into his - and only _his_ \- body!

The man fell.

Asuka Saginomiya had won. She had seriously damaged a boyfriend. He may even be dying.

"My son!" Nodoka wept! ; "Son-in-law!" cried Soun. ; "My heir!" Genma screamed.

"I won't let you die! I won't!" yelled Akane. She ran to where he lay bloody, bruised and scorched. "I'll heal you! I have _some_ healing power! I _have to_ go beyond any I've ever used!"

Kasumi looked at the scene, her heartbreaking. Surely, her guardian angel would…. No. Heaven interfered only when Heaven felt it was necessary. Heaven could seem so cruel and uncaring at times.

"Stop being in shock, Idiots!" Nabiki yelled. "You're experienced, advanced martial artists! If anybody has the healing abilities to save Ranma, it's you! Do it!"

First Soun, then Genma rushed to Ranma. Genma was the first to reach his son.

But Soun pulled him away. "Akane! My daughter Akane is the best vessel! She showed the first determination!"

Genma nodded and gave his hand to his old friend. And the man put his hand on his daughter. The ki was drawn from them and into Akane and, then, into Ranma.

Then something disturbed the flow of energy!

But only for the time it took for Nodoka to put both hands over her husband's.

There was an extra surge of energy in the flow!

Ranma felt maternal feelings. Ranma felt how his pop felt about him. And Mr. Tendo.

But most of all, he felt the growing friendship and affection Akane felt for him. For some reason, it brought back memories of the last time he had felt something similar. It had come from his old childhood buddy, Ukyo. But this, this was not child-like. It was more intimate. And. better, more immediate.

The first thing Ranma saw on opening his eyes was Kasumi. She was praying for him.

Then he turned his sore neck and head to see, "Akane." He reached out to touch her face.

"No movements!" his mother told him. "We must determine the extent of your injuries."

"I'll be fine, Mom. Please, I don't want you to worry. Not no more. For me, please, don't worry."

Genma placed his hand over the hand still on his other hand. "She is a strong woman. She has to be, to be the wife and mother of martial artists."

"That's the first time you ever said I was strong, Hus...Genma." And she began wiping her tears away.

"My problem was that you have always been too strong for me." And he didn't mean it in a good sense, this time.

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Kasumi, the Tendo's resident nurse, gave Ranma a quick assessment, and it was her opinion he would be fully recovered soon. "80 percent of healing is mental attitude, and Ranma certainly has that."

"Sometimes, too much attitude," Nabiki said.

Then she had a new thought, "Why wasn't the first attack followed up with a second? It makes no strategic sense."

"Perhaps, it is for tactical reasons," Genma said.

"Perhaps, she ran out of flowers," Kasumi suggested.

"You saw how many Asuka has behind her back like a peacock!" Akane said. Even though the _peahens_ had no such tails.

Then the answer is quite simple," Soun said. "The mistress of the little kuroko wasn't with her. She _did_ have to suddenly chase after that little ninja boyfriend of hers, did she not?"

"And she wouldn't like having to reveal to her mistress she had revealed the plan," Nodoka said.

"The little ninja, Sasuke, said they were after _me_ , but they didn't care if others got hurt! I gotta get away from Mom and Akane and everybody!" And before they could stop him, he ran-

And broke the tripstring the kuroko had boobytrapped the way to the outside. Dumbbells fell down on Ranma and his head.

"Not again!" his mom cried.

But Genma stopped her from getting any closer. Then he cursed himself. He was showing her far more care than he wanted.

Letting them roll off of him, Ranma was up and ready, again. "I can't go home with you, Mom. Not until I make sure movin' back home with you won't end up hurtin' you because of me! I'm gonna find this Asuka and her personal kuroko and make sure they don't hurt others again!"

And he was gone!

"My how very manly!" Nodoka was impressed.

"He has to be. Man or woman, Ranma has to be a hero, Aunt Nodoka," Akane said, moving closer to her. "It's his curse."

"Call me…." No, not "Mom". The time wasn't right for that. "Call me Nodoka-san." And she placed her hand on the girl who had saved her son's life.

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How do you find a kuroko? As long as she was still without her mask, she _could_ be found. Without the black mask, she was left wearing the unusual, black costume. He didn't have to sight her directly, at first. He just needed to do rooftop leaping and find people looking at something they couldn't ignore.

Ranma's search was soon rewarded. Unlike ninjas, kuroko were used to others' ignoring them and had poor stealth skills. In the long shadows of the late afternoon, she was darting between them. She would pause, figuring out which shadow to go to next. She ignored those not ignoring her.

He could easily take her. But that would be the tactical thing to do. Like with Sasuke, he understood her. As a servant, she was doing the bidding of her mistress. It was her mistress, Asuka, he had to first takedown! If, after he had, the servant _still_ wanted to make trouble, _then_ she, too, would have to be dealt with!

So, Ranma followed. And, staying above her vision, he was ignored.

It turned out the kuroko had to rebel against being ignored sometimes. She was a practical joker. And the jokes were at least as ancient as the kuroko tradition itself. But she was skilled at them.

She would toss marbles where people could slip on them. Or she would use a makeup compact to flash the glare of sunlight into a person's eyes at just the wrong moment, so they failed to avoid something, like a bottle in the street or another passerby. With string, she would lasso something like one of the garbage bags waiting to be collected and make somebody trip.

Ranma jumped down, collected the marbles and used them warn people by hitting them with them, far from any spot that could hurt them. He broke the strings when she wasn't looking.

Then she did a prank that was just as ancient, but with a tool that was modern and a skill that was remarkable! She used an emergency, glass-breaking hammer to make holes in a restaurant's glasses, turning them into dribble glasses. Ranma was now even more wary of her.

No one had stopped her yet, though. When it looked like they might, Ranma had plunked them with a marble as a warning.

She left the shopping street and approached a place in Nerima that had tall buildings.

Then, Ranma heard explosions! He leaped ahead of the kuroko!

He found a parade float blocking an intersection. It was decorated with white lilies, of course, with only their green stems the only other color. Again the pale-skinned woman in white was picture perfect behind her frame.

But hers was a static display. Full of attention-demanding movements were the ribbons of Kodachi that managed to keep a flurry of black rose petals in the air around her in her leotard. And Sasuke was there with a flower peddler's cart full of more black roses.

"Ostentatious! Gaudy! Tacky! That has always been your problem, Asuka! Your penchant for still life has made you a weak martial artist!"

And her ribbon sent a single, black rose at a passing man who _dared_ look at her rival. Boom! And the man was no longer looking. He wasn't conscious, at all!

"Martial artist? Please! You flaunt your half-dressed body in the hopes at least a pervert will notice you, Kodachi!"

And she waved a white lily towards a man who was caught looking at the gymnast's uncovered legs. Boom! Now, he, too, was no longer staring!

Or, perhaps, these men were like some of the others who had stopped to gawk at the ongoing scene out of an action movie or manga. So many, too many to Ranma, were treating this threat with stupid interest! Some were on phones! Some had cameras out and were taking pictures! A handful was making drawings in their sketchbooks or whatever piece of paper was handy, including a newspaper.

One was even painting Kodachi! Boom! She wasn't any longer! Yes, _she!_ There were also women staying to watch this disaster! She was, though, the only woman to be accused of admiring the beauty of one the opponents over the other. So far.

Despite their stupidity, Ranma had sworn by the Code to protect the weak! But more important, he had to stop these madwomen _now!_ For the sake of those he loved and cared about.

He snagged a black rose on his way to the ground - And he tossed it at white lily that was headed for another standing bystander. They exploded on contract with each other! The concussive force was twice as large as from a single flower. But at least it was far enough away from anybody to cause them real harm.

"Kodachi! Asuka! Stop this right now! I _won't_ let this go on!"

"Romeo!" Kadachi cried. Still remembering the kiss that had stolen her will, a shiver of delight that went through her! This caused her to lose control of her ribbons, and her black petals floated to the ground around her.

"So, this is Romeo? This is your boyfriend, Kodachi?" Asuka said, raising out of the chair on the float.

"I ain't her boyfriend! I ain't nobody's boyfriend!"

"That means you can still become Kodachi's boyfriend! I cannot allow that!"

"Watch out, Romeo," was all Kodachi would do to prevent what was about to happen.

A door in the float opened and out shot a steel bear trap!

Ranma stepped back from the fierce weapon at the end of a chain.

When he saw it was headed for Kodachi, he grabbed the chain. But the trap and chain were magnetic enough to attract each other, and the momentum of the trap sent it around Ranma's arm, catching him its chain!

"I call this my Man Trap," Asuka said.

"And I call this one, my Coup de Disgrace!" And from another door came another trap on a chain.

 _This_ one chomped down on Ranma's buttocks! "Aaa! This _hurts_ you know!"

"Yes, I imagine it does. Oh, poor boyfriend, you will make a poor choice of a boyfriend with your tight, male buttocks mangled."

"Romeo can heal!" Kodachi told her rival. "He's a true martial artist! His handsome physique will prevail!"

"When I am done with him, no one shall consider him handsome! _Then_ I won't care if you continue to date him, Kodachi!"

The kuroko woman had arrived. Her string was now a cats cradle! She wrapped it around Ranma's face until it was contorted out of shape in a painful way!

"Romeo! Be a martial artist worthy to be my boyfriend!" Kodachi told him. "Don't let them play with your handsome looks!"

"Enough!" he cried, first breaking the string off his face! He took the chain wrapped around his other arm and used _both_ hands to pull! His strength dragged the float towards him.

With her control, Asuke released the chains. Her float stopped at an odd angle in the intersection.

Reaching behind his back and between his thighs, Ranma was able to free his butt from the other trap.

He kept the other trap and chain as an anything-goes weapon. "Stop hurtin' people! Or I'm gonna bust up that thing of yours, Asuka!"

She looked at her magnificent parade float covered all in her trademark flowers. Her complexion went from pale to almost as white at her lilies.

But she was a proud beauty. She dared him to do it. "Their explosion would break all the windows in the buildings around here, and leave a crater that, I would say, rupture water and sewage mains. How disgusting!" The man had forced her to say "sewage"!

Ranma growled. He had no doubt she was so thoughtless about others' safety that she _would_ have all those flowers be explosive.

"Here, Darling Romeo!" Kodachi gave him two bouquets of _her_ trademark flowers. "You can defeat her with these."

"I _ain't_ gonna throw explosive flowers into explosive flowers!" Kodachi was as crazy as Asuka, but Ranma thought she was _at least_ sane enough not to want _herself_ blown up!

"They're explosive roses, Darling. They're poisoned roses!"

"I _ain't gonna kill her for you!_ "

"Oh, dear, you're not?

"Sasuke! Bring some paralyzing roses!"

When Ranma saw the ninja's apologetic face, he knew that, yes, they _would_ paralyze. Ranma now faced a dilemma. This was _not_ how martial artists fought! Even non-martial artists, the weak, could use chemicals. (Just look at Makoto's brother!)

But it would stop the threat these two were!

Hmm, _two_. If he used the roses on the one who gave him them, that would be justice, _karma_. And it would show Asuka Ranma Saotome was _not_ Kodachi's boyfriend!

The problem was the Something! It was treating the flowers not as a weapon but as a _gift!_ She had given them to him of her own free will. _But_ , Ranma argued with the Something, it was only so _he_ would carry out an attack! The rules of the game Kodachi and Asuka were playing didn't allow them to directly hurt one another!

But his internal argument proved to be taking too long and be too distracting.

"Ro- Mistress!" Sasuke warned.

Ranma didn't see it, but could well believe that a bouquet of white lilies had been thrown at them! He jumped, grabbing Kodachi and Sasuke.

And there was a large explosion!

The concussive force propelled them into the flower peddler's cart! Ranma's training had him absorb most of the impact.

But not all of it. Sasuke and Kodachi lost consciousness.

And Asuka was so lost in such a great, loud, annoying Noblewoman's laugh, she failed to notice that Romeo had suddenly disappeared.

In his place was the pigtailed redhead, Ranma. To keep the flowers fresh, the cart had had containers of water.

Ranma roared! Her secret was revealed! Only idiots wouldn't put two and two together, now! She was _wearing the same clothes_ as "Romeo" had just been wearing!

She leaped! She landed on the float and grabbed Asuka by the part of her dress between her boobs. She felt the tight fit compress those boobs, hopefully painfully! She was ready to mess up her face as she had tried to mess up hers!

But she couldn't. The Code wouldn't let her. And, more importantly, her girl brain wouldn't let her.

There _had to be_ something she could do to this bitch to hurt her!

Her girl brain gave her a most wicked idea. A delightfully wicked idea! And Ranma grinned.

And she continued to grin as she started plucking the flowers off of the float! She leaped down and caught one or many, and hopped, skipped and jumped to one man after another in the gathering. "Here! Asuka wants you to have this!" , "You, too!" , "Hey, don't go away without a white lily!" , "That's what she calls herself, _The White Lily!_ ", "But her real name is Asuka, the Fake Princess!" , "She wants you to be her _boyfriend!_ " , "And _you, too!_ " , "Asuka can't have too many boyfriends!" , "She wants to set a record of having the most boyfriends!" , "Come and get your picture with her!" . "Vote for Asuka!" , "Let everybody know how many boyfriends Asuka has!"

"Asuka's going to be famous!" And as there were still more flowers than men about, Ranma threw the exploding flowers up against each other in the air. They became like fireworks. "Asuka! Asuka! Asuka! Everybody, all Asuka's boyfriends, cheer her on!"

And they did! They weren't as stupid as they had seemed. They understood what the little redhead was trying to do to the evil girl. Or, at least enough of them to do it and, so, encourage others. Even the women joined in! "Asuka, Every boy's girlfriend!"

Her float and her reputation ravaged, Asuka jumped down from her float and fled, crying great sobs of humiliation. She was so devastated, she forgot to take her picture frame with her.

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Ranma was gone before Kodachi and Sasuke had recovered enough of what sense they had to understand what had happened. It probably didn't matter, though. They would learn from the people in the crowd that he, Romeo, had turned into the girl. They would have to be self-centered, snobs not wanting to mingle too long with the commoners not to find out from those same peasants the truth.

Her butt still hurt, and since hers had a greater surface than he did, the pain was more widespread. But she was still able to leap from rooftop to rooftop on the most direct and fastest course back to her mom and Akane and the others.

"Ranma!(?)" Nodoka cried at the sight of her, still finding it hard to believe this girl was also her son.

"Mom!" the redhead cried, too, landing before her mom and hugging her, glad _she_ was safe.

"Things should be okay, for now."

"Oh, I'm afraid not! Your father... _and_ Mr. Tendo...they've been injured!"

" _What!?_ How?!"

"Boobytraps! That Asuka girl and her kuroko had already set them. And it was the men who were the unfortunate ones to trigger them!"

It became harder and harder to hear what her mom was saying as there was an increasingly loud chopping sound coming down from the sky outside.

Finally, the rush of air from the helicopter entered through the open shoji doors. It brought back memories from yesterday!

And, sure enough, it _was_ another one from NHK Broadcasting, only this one smaller. It was so low to the ground, Mr. Toru, Dr. Tofu's brother, was able to jump out unaided.

"Tofu told me about the problem and I volunteered to help!" the man said, holding up his phone. "I won't make the call to him until Kasumi is where he can't hear her!"

They could barely hear him over the noise and rush of wind. But Ranma understood. He thought he understood Kasumi enough by now to know where she was. She started for the Mr. Tendo's room. A gesture brought a nod from his mom. So she went.

Kasumi was already on her way out to investigate. "Oh, my!" she said when she saw what was the cause.

"Kasumi! I need your medical help!" Ranma said loudly as the helicopter rose back into the air, leaving.

"You do?" she asked, even as she watched a vaguely familiar-looking stranger pass her and head down the hall.

"Yes!" Ranma said, blushing in embarrassment at the thought of pulling down her pants in front of her mom and revealing the trap bite mark on her butt.

"What is that noise?' Akane asked, limping in. "Ranma! You're back!" And she limped faster.

"Akane! What happened to you?!"

"I tripped on a helmet from a suit of armor, if you can believe that!" she said, no longer quite so happy.

"That's great! See, Kasumi? Akane needs your medical help!"

'But-"

"Mr. Toru has the Doc on the phone in your dad's room…"

"But I'm more needed with him! Transferring so much of the healing _ki_ into Ranma has weakened father's and Uncle Saotome's and they're having trouble healing themselves!"

It took some gentle effort to keep Kasumi away. But it was Nodoka that won the "battle". Though not understanding _why_ it was important to keep the young woman away from her father and Genma, she did understand Kasumi's role in her family.

"Since I'm not allowed to be of any medical help, I'll clean up after the disaster while you tend to others, Kasumi."

"Oh, my, no! I can't allow you to do that. You're our guest!" This was a challenge to her domain. Kasumi was too polite to order or prevent the more mature woman from cleaning _her_ house, but she did feel she had to work to do _more_ of it. It became a competition between the two housewives!

Meanwhile, Burin-chan came in (after hopping over dumbbells) through the shoji doors. "Burin- I mean, Ryoga!" Akane rushed to pick him up. "I'm glad you could find us!"

"And so soon, too," Ranma said. "I told you had tracking ability!"

"Is this Akane's pet?" her mom asked as she came in with an arm and a leg of medieval, European armor.

"Naw! He ain't nobody's pet. He's cursed like me, mom. 'Sept, _he_ turns into a pig. We call him _Burin-chan_ when he is a pig. But his real name is Ryoga, uh,...something. He'll tell you when he has some hot water.

"Oh, yeah! I need hot water, too!"

"Kasumi and Akane told me to keep a teakettle on a hot burner."

"Thanks, Mom." She took the pig away by his bandana. "Come on, Burin, you've had your fun snuggling up to Akane."

[][][]

The redhead, and, then, Ryoga, were in time to lift the refrigerator back up from the floor for Kasumi.

Strangely, Ranma didn't have to go into the living room and get some Men's Sizes women's apparel. Ryoga came back into the common room fully dressed in his usual clothes.

Ranma, though, wasn't able to become a Men's Size. The teakettle had been on the stove too long and too much had been steamed away for _her_ to have enough to change after Ryoga had used it.

"Mom, this is Ryoga Hibiki," the redhead said.

"Mrs. Saotome," he bowed to the woman making a neat, out-of-the-way pile of dumbbells.

"Hibiki, you say? Have you considered dating Nabiki?" she smiled.

"Mom!" Ranma groaned. "If that was a joke, it was bad."

"I don't get it," Ryoga said.

"Nabiki Hibiki," Akane said the name. She wasn't amused, but she thought, "There could be worse names."

"So, how long have you known, Ranma?" Nodoka said, standing.

"That all depends. Ranma and I go back to junior high. But I only really got to _know him_ yesterday," Ryoga smiled at his frenemy.

"Hey, Ranma. Is it alright if I sleep with you again, tonight?"

Nodoka almost lost her balance. "You slept together, Ranma? I hope you weren't like this."

"I have the photographic evidence," Nabiki said, leaning against the other door.

Ranma suddenly remembered the photo she had Ryoga tear up. Nabiki didn't lie, so she probably _did_ have a duplicate of that one, where the right picture at a wrong moment caught her and Ryoga looking like they were doing something _other than_ battling in their sleep.

But Ranma had been getting to know Nabiki. She _may just_ have one like it but one where Ranma was still a guy.

Akane had an idea, "It's getting late, Mrs. Saotome. Why not sleep in my room? I'll get a sleeping bag and I and Ranma and Ryoga can sleep here, in this room, for the night."

"That solves _this_ night's problem," Nodoka said. Her inner rebel had a naughty threesome thought. But her traditionalist didn't approve of the thought at all.

But she put it aside. Her reunion with her child was too new to dwell on thoughts like that, either pro or con.

Besides, the man with the phone had come back from helping her husband and his friend.

"Tofu, thinks Mr. Tendo and Mr. Saotome will be alright after a night's rest." An odd look crossed his face as he said, "In fact, Mr. Saotome insisted on it."

Nodoka was greatly disappointed. It had been _ten years_ since she had last seen her husband! There was a lot of lost time to make up! And what better way to punish her _Bad Boy_.

[][][]

Mr. Toru assured them all that he was an able assistant to his brother, the real doctor. "Our father was also a doctor. I was interested in becoming a doctor myself, until Drama Club. I discovered I have a talent for speaking. I have even done some voice acting."

"Does your family approve of you not following your father's and brother's example?" Nodoka asked.

"No. They don't. That's been part of our problem. I was reminded of that after meeting these two fine young women, yesterday. Today, I am able to continue my campaign to win their approval."

"I see," Nodoka smiled politely.

Ranma was nervous having the broadcaster staying around. And Akane, his mom, and even Ryoga picked up on it. "You must be goin' now, right?"

"Yes, I do. I am waiting for the car they're sending for me. It's been delayed because of an incident in the Nerima Manga District."

"Oh, my!" Kasumi said. "I had completely forgotten!"

"Manga District?" Ryoga's eyes lit. "Mangas are made here?"

Mr. Toru gently laughed. "After daikon radishes, mangas and anime are what Nerima is most famous for.

"And, now, with our comics and cartoons being popular outside Japan, that's what Nerima is _internationally_ famous for," Nabiki said.

"What happened happened in a place where what happened will be made world famous?" Ranma felt sick.

No one present knew, yet, what had happened in the "Manga District". Ranma hadn't had the chance to tell them. But, Akane reached out her hand, "Dr. Tofu and Kasumi could have an answer."

"Maybe I can help. I've become something of an expert on mangas and animes at NHK," Mr. Toru said.

"Really?!" Ryoga, clueless, was delighted. "I wanted to become a martial artist because of mangas and animes I saw as a kid!"

But his mood took a downturn. "Because I'm seldom home, I can't collect them."

Now an upturn, "When I _am_ home, I read the ones I _do_ have!

"I sure would like to visit this place where they make mangas and anime!

"Only, I'm sure I won't find it. Even when I'm this close to it."

"Sounds like there's a dramatic story there," Mr. Toru said.

"Would you be interested in dramatic stories?"

"Nabiki!" Akane cried.

"What? I'm talking _fiction_."

"Well, that's not really my department down at the studios. However…"

The front door slid open. "Mr. Ono?! Excuse me, but is there a Mr. Toru Ono, here?! I'm here to pick him up and drive him to his assignment!"

"May have your business card?" Nabiki asked.

"Oh, where are my manners! I should have given you _all_ my business cards." And the broadcaster gave a small stack to Nabiki to pass around. "Now, excuse me, but I do have to be leaving. Sayonara! Until we meet again!"

"A somewhat informal professional," Nodoka said after he had left.

"Formality doesn't cut it on TV," Nabiki informed her. "Unless it's expected in a given situation."

"I think he's very much like his brother," Akane said. Was she transferring her crush on Dr. Tofu over to Mr. Toru? But what about Ranma?

[][][]

"You don't have to help me prepare supper, Aunt Saotome," Kasumi said. Again, her domain had been invaded, "You are our guest."

"But I would _love_ to help. For ten years, I have been making meals only for myself and a few friends. I _do_ want to be able to cook, again, for my child ...and even my husband. This will be our first meal together after all that time apart."

"Oh, my! You're right, Auntie Saotome! Here! I'll leave and let you do all the cooking!"

"Thank you, Kasumi!" Nodoka bowed to the younger woman. "Thank you, so very much!"

[][][]

"Oh, my! Now I don't know what to do!" Kasumi fretted at the loss of something to keep her busy. The boobytraps had all been cleared, put out of harm's way, and the damage at least made tidy. And Aunt Nodoka and she had raced to see who could finish the most chores.

"I'm done getting my room ready for Mrs. Saotome," Akane announced, limping only a little, now, with her ankle wrapped.

"You, too? -Oh, I know! Ranma's taking a shower and a bath! After he's finished I can clean in there!"

"I took care of that for you!" the black-haired boy said, back in his Chinese clothes. "I want to show Mom how responsible I can be! After all, on the road, it was _me_ , not Pop, that did the chores."

"Oh, my!" Kasumi sighed. Idle hands did not suit her.

She was forced to sit down at the common room table and do nothing. "So, Ranma, you're going back home with your mother?"

"Not until I'm sure the boobytraps aren't gonna come after me. I ain't gonna let Mom get hurt! Not 'cuz of me!" His concern broadened. "And I shouldn't stay here, too, and let you and the others get hurt, Big Sister."

"Hey! You don't care if I get hurt?" Akane frowned.

"You're a martial artist. I think you can handle risks and overcome dangers."

"Oh, Ranma!" tears welled up in her eyes. _He_ , the best martial artist she had ever met - _her_ sensei! - said that! Her _Romeo_ did not treat his _Juliet_ like a damsel in distress.

" _I'm_ going with you, Ranma! I have a sleeping bag, and there's Dad's old travel pack in the attic!"

"Akane, I said you can meet the dangers, I didn't say I _want_ you to! I _want_ to think of you as safe!"

"That will _only_ be a want if you don't let me come! I'll _put_ myself at risk! Remember that horde of hentais I fought _every morning_."

"Oh, my, Akane's getting stubborn, again," Kasumi sighed. "Ranma, does Akane have the battle potential to be a great martial artist?"

"Sure. With the proper trainin'-"

"But I've _never_ had the proper training! I haven't even been on a training trip!" she screamed her frustration. "Except for the basics, everything I know, I had to teach myself!"

"Whoa! Really. Then you are a natural, Akane. You can do all that bein' a rank amateur?"

"If you and she go, I have to leave here, too," Ryoga said. "You're the only reason I _can_ stay here."

"We'll all go on a training trip!" Akane smiled at the adventure, finally, awaiting her.

Just, then, Ranma's mother appeared with the first part of their first supper together after ten years! He was reunited with his mother. He had found a second family.

He would not say goodbye to them. He would just leave.

[][][] [][][] [][][]

Mr. Toru Tofu is not part of the original _Ranma ½_ mythos, of course. He is a character I added.


	21. Chapter 23 The Long Way Home

An unusual disclaimer: Ranma ½ is a trademark of Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ Communications, and its characters have been borrowed without permission. And Son Turned Daughter was originally written way back in 2002 by the FanFiction author Tangent, and his characters Megumi, Yasushi and Ayane have, likewise, been borrowed without permission. Please see the first two chapters of this story under his pen name. This story is written for non-commercial purposes only.

[][][] [][][] [][][]

Ranma's mother hadn't seen her child in ten years. What she knew of him was from when he was still a child. And like any child, Ranma had had a sweet tooth. So, for their first meal as a family again, this traditional woman had prepared mochi, daifuku (yet another rice cake), and anpan (a sweet roll), miso soup, fish, and no vegetables because her son hadn't liked them.

"Mochi!" Kasumi clapped her hands in delight. "That's the tradition for celebrating the New Year!"

"Yes," Nodoka admitted. "This _is_ our "New Year". The old years of our lives are over, and we begin our new years as a complete family."

"Mom," Ranma mumbled. Geez! This wasn't making what he had to do any easier.

"And daifuku and…," Nabiki broke open the roll, "anpan! Both filled with sweet red bean paste."

"Nabiki, that is not funny!" Akane told her. "And, if you hadn't noticed, Ranma's a _boy_ now!"

"And sekihan is what is served to the girl on that occasion," Kasumi said. "And Ranma hasn't been becoming a girl long enough to have _that_ happen, yet."

"Oh, dear! That's right!" Nodoka gasped. " My son _may_ have to face the womanly facts of life."

(It's not funny, but I got the results I was expecting," Nabiki smirked.)

"Ranma, later tonight, we're going to sit down and have a mother and…. Oh, dear!"

"Excuse me, Auntie Saotome," Kasumi said. "But we talked about this earlier. We, the Tendo sisters, think it would be better if Ranma heard this from Dr. Tofu. If there is any _man_ who can understand what your son has to...endure and adjust to, it is our family physician."

"Doctor Tofu not only knows chiropractic, but acupressure, and moxibustion, and Chinese medicine, and is a skilled martial artist!" Akane said.

" ' don't know about the other stuff, but, yeah, the Doc is a very good martial artist." And Ranma smiled. "He's taught Pop a thing or two, hasn't he?"

Genma glared. Feeling outnumbered, he and Soun had remained quiet. They thought it best for their recovering health.

"He's also the one to convince me I gotta stay a girl part of the time."

"He did, did he? I _would_ like to have a talk with him."

"His clinic is closed, Auntie Saotome. But I'm sure we can make an appointment with him tomorrow, Monday," Kasumi said.

[][][]

Nodoka borrowed a coat from Kasumi, a taller woman, and went out to the dojo with her son. Who was _still_ her son. "Now we can have a private chat, Ranma. We can begin to catch up on all that we've missed."

"You go first, Mom. Pop's refused to talk much about you. I wasn't even sure you were still alive."

"Yes. That does sound like my husband. If he could face his responsibilities, he wouldn't have left me alone for ten years! It was only through the generosity of my family that I have survived this long. And _that_ only happened _after_ he left me."

Her frown left her, replaced by an uncertainty. "Perhaps it was for the best. As you can guess from the way I dress, speak and carry myself, I was raised to be very old-fashioned. Traditional, my family calls it. I even carry-" she made to heft the what she was so used to holding, but was no longer there, "...or _carried_ the nodachi sword that represents my family's samurai heritage.

"If you had stayed with me, they, the whole clan, would have tried to see that you were just as hidebound as they."

She touched his face. "You would not be the person you are today. And, and…"

She took her hand away and turned away. "...and I wouldn't have liked you much. I have _tried_ to rebel against my upbringing and conditioning. The closest I've ever come was marrying your father, Genma."

She smiled at her memories. "I wouldn't even have met Genma unless I had not caught him burglarizing my parents' house."

"WHAT!? Pop broke into your house?!"

"No, not _break-in_! That would have caused damage. That would have been Yama-Sen Ken. No, your father was practicing his martial art of Umi-Sen Ken, the Way of the Quiet Thief." She winked. "I've kept the manual he was using so he wouldn't learn to do be an accomplished thief."

"Pop's still a thief." Then Ranma's judgment became less harsh. "But I can hardly call him an accomplished thief. He gets caught more than he doesn't. It's just luck and _me_ bein' there to help him escape that's kept him from jail, or worse."

"You haven't aided and abetted in his crimes, have you, Ranma?" Nodoka frowned.

"Only a little. Mainly when I was younger and didn't really know any better. But, no, I've taken a vow to be _honorable!_ Not more honorable than my Old Man, most people could, but honorable, if you know what I mean."

His mother smiled proudly at him.

"And, lately there's been this Something that sees that I go even beyond _that_ idea of what's honorable."

But Ranma shook it off. This wasn't the time to talk about that. "I wanna hear more about how you met Pop."

"I heard him." Then she chuckled. "He wasn't the Quiet Thief!" She lifted the sword she no longer had, and held it out, acting out her words, "I confronted him! And he…." she paused to build up the suspense of her story.

"He screamed and groveled and begged!" Ranma grinned. "He _would_ have run if you'd've let him."

Her missing sword disappeared. "No." She smiled a disturbing smile. For a moment she was lost in that time, again.

But her eyes refocused on her son in the here-and-now. "Uh, yes. Let's just say it was…love at first sight. Yes, I shall use the word Love. Great, _passionate_ , mutual Love."

"?" Ranma got the hint that "Love" wasn't really the correct word, but he had no idea what his mom didn't want to say. "You sayin' it _wasn't_ a prearranged marriage."

"Oo, Kaneto! He was the one my family had given me to in a betrothal contract! As I said, they are very Traditional. Genma had to fight a duel for my hand in marriage!"

"Pop actually fought a duel? And won?" Okay, in his younger days, maybe. Still, "The guy wasn't a martial artist, I bet."

"Oh. but Kaneto was! And he was not only strong, he was handsome and wealthy!"

"Huh! ...Why does that sound familiar? Was he an idiot, Mom? I mean a bigger one than Pop?"

"Well...nobody's perfect, son."

"Okay, Mom, how did Pop manage to win?"

Nodoka adopted an enigmatic smile. "Kaneto was susceptible to nosebleeds."

"Mom!" Ranma cried in shock.

"Oh, dear! I forgot you turn into a girl." And Nodoka frowned! "How many nosebleeds have you caused?! It had better have been for a good reason, young...Oh, dear!"

[][][]

It came time for everybody to get ready to go to sleep.

Akane showed Mrs. Saotome to her room.

"Thank you, again, Akane-chan for saving my son's life. I could feel your concern for him. He is lucky to have found a friend like you. Do you think anything more might develop?"

"We'll know in a year, Mrs. Saotome. Ranma, I and my sisters have agreed to put off making a decision about the contract our dad's made until then. There will be a fight if we decide not to honor the contract. I am sure my sister Nabiki has already thought of ways around the problem."

"And if you _do_ decide, Ranma will only be 17," Nodoka smiled, "So you couldn't marry him even then."

"What do you mean? -Oh! That's right! Under Japanese law, a boy can't be married until he's 18!"

"Where a girl only has to be 16," Nabiki said.

"Nabiki!" Akane turned to see her sister leaning against her open door, her arms crossed.

"Now, what if you could legally marry Ranma at 16?" she smirked.

Akane blushed unable to find an answer within herself.

"Japanese law also says nobody under 20 may marry without their parents' consent," Nodoka reminded.

[][][]

Akane came into the common room still with some color in her face. She saw the male Ranma on the floor on his sleeping bag and was glad he wasn't the redhead.

And Ryoga wasn't a little, black pig, either. "How's your ankle, Akane?"

"I'm sure it's practically healed by now, Ryoga. I'll be ready for our training trip tomorrow!"

"It's a school day, you know," Ranma reminded her.

"And for you, too! But _you're_ not going! -And what about you, Ryoga?!"

"I haven't gone to school since I was kicked in the head in Junior High."

But he refused to let depression defeat him this time, "I have studied when I can! I go to libraries and read magazines and books off of the stands! Education is very important!"

"That's the kind of attitude you should have, Ranma." Akane tried not to sound like a scold.

"My education has been in martial arts. If it's not important to that, why do I gotta know it?"

"Education makes you a better person! And it _has been_ a martial art for me! I have to battle for what _I_ get!"

"Ryoga, would you like to go to our high school?" Akane asked. "It's pretty easy to get in. Especially, if you are a martial artist."

"Really?" Hope lit up his eyes.

Then dimmed. "I'll lose my way."

"I'll help you get to school and back! And Ranma will help, too! _Won't_ you, Ranma?!"

"Aw, sure. Why not." He _was_ the guy that had kicked him in the head that triggered his family's problem with directions. How else could the guy have found his way to school every day if it wasn't _before_ he got his compass scrambled?

"You won't mind being _Burin-chan_ , will you? I can carry you to school and back, then you _won't_ get lost!"

"Hey! Remember, Ryoga's a guy! Don't go snugglin' up to his pig!"

"Jealous?" Akane giggled.

She stepped towards the boy with the bandana. She was going to give him a peck on his nose as if he were a pig with a snout.

She never got the chance!

Holding his nose, Ryoga ran outside as fast as he could.

"That's a great idea!" And she picked up her sleeping bag. "Let's all sleep under the stars, tonight! It'll be like we're _already_ on our training trip!"

[][][]

Akane was excited. Ryoga was depressed about having to sleep outside again. Ranma didn't say much. He let the other two do most of the small talk.

And, then, they were asleep.

[][][]

Sunrise came and he and his travel pack were far from Nerima. He was on yet another training trip. Only this was the first one where he didn't have Pop with him. He was all by himself. Alone. Without friends. Without...family. In just the five days he had known them, the Tendos were becoming like family. And, yesterday, he had found his real family, his mom! He had spent less than _one_ day with her!

But it was for her good. It was for _everybody's_ good. Including his own. That battle in the 'Manga District' had shown him that fame was closing in on him. People wouldn't know him as the World's Best Martial Artist. No, they'd know him as the Freak Sex Changer!

He could handle being targeted by other martial artists out to prove themselves against him. He was prepared for that! He grew up knowing that the better he got, the more fights he would get into. That's how martial artists improved their skills. That's how a martial artist knew he was over the hill and had to open a dojo or something.

But he was _not_ prepared to beat off the perverts! He couldn't see them having martial arts skills. They probably didn't have much of any skills. They probably had techniques, though. Techniques that would make his skin crawl all the way down to his soul! Hiroshi and Daisuke and that Hentai Horde at school gave him a sample. And they had to be only rank amateurs! The real Masters of Perversion could, maybe, leave _both_ his manliness and womanliness shattered messes.

Out here, on the road, he had a better chance at escaping. They would hit and _he_ would run!

"Geez! That don't sound like bein' a martial artist. But, at least, I won't be shamin' my family and friends. And I won't be attractin' perverts who'd also go after Akane and her sisters."

[][][]

Of course, it rained. It was a spring rain, but that didn't make Ranma feel any better. It might as well have been a _November Rain_ (by Megumi Hayashibara),

All over town,

You can see tears.

You cannot see the drops of rain

Running down my cheeks…

That was all the lyrics, she could remember. The rest probably didn't fit with her life as it was now. But the music had a feeling she could relate to. And she liked the voice of the singer.

The rain did stop.

"Enough! You're Ranma Saotome! This is a trainin' trip and you're gonna train!"

And despite the lyrics, her new music was upbeat. _I & Myself_ (by Megumi Hayashibara)

The sound of the loneliness about to break  
like the echoing of a bell  
I walk through the days even after fever

I'm not scared but I want to cry  
The speed that feeds my heart  
suddenly puts the break and spins

My whole body is lost between power and weakness  
Let's go and believe in my me of tomorrow

I want to see you Tomorrow World  
I'm full of courage  
and love Tomorrow Heart  
Look at me call me

[][][]

The Tendos and his Mom hadn't been told about the Saotome Survival Skills. There were the pure skills required to live off the land in the countryside (with avoiding farmhands being near the top). And then there were the base skills required to live off the land in the city. And since the redhead was still in a place of streets that went on for miles, the base, ignoble ones were what she had to use.

The little woman set down her big, heavy travel pack in front of a public bathhouse. From its own pocket in the pack, she brought a cheap-looking, collapsible metal bowl. It only looked cheap. She had won it from another martial artist in a challenge, and she had been challenged for it many times since.

She pulled the rings so they formed a full-sized bowl, set it down on the street, and began the Saotome City Survival Skills! Ranma Saotome was now a busker.

She began with the warm-up. She began with her katas. The simpler ones. She didn't want to warn off the suckers. But they still had to be impressive enough to get people to stop and gawk and, hopefully, throw a few coins in the bowl. There always seemed to be a handful that were generous enough. The chances were almost certain she would, at least, make enough for admittance into the bathhouse. She would worry about which side, women's or men's, when she got to the curtains.

"As you can see by my moves, I'm a martial artist! And I claim to be the best for my age! I'll take on whoever wants to challenge me! Name your wager! But you gotta pay the price of admission! 2,000 yen! You think that's cheap? It is! But that's how confident I am! I _wanna_ battle!"

Ranma noticed she was drawing more of a crowd than she usually did. And _this_ part of Greater Tokyo had more of an outskirts feel to it as if it was beginning to shade off to the countryside. It was "Nerima" without the tall buildings and daikon fields.

But it was several minutes before she got a nibble.

"Can you break a cinder block with your head?"

She sighed. "You couldn't come up with something original? Sure, I can! Just put 4,000 yen in the bowl!"

"You said it'd only cost 2,000 yen to fight you!"

"You wanna see me bash my head against somethin' hard or do you wanna fight me?"

The man held up his hands and shook his head. And he didn't put in 4,000 yen.

A group of teenage boys in the standard, plebe uniform of high schools stopped and stood in the back of the gathering. What were they doing here? Why weren't they in school? Ranma knew in an instant they would be trouble.

Another man nudged the other man, who could have been his nearly thirty-year-old son. The "father" dropped a couple of 50-yen coins. Grudgingly, his "son" dropped in another and a 10-yen coin.

It was a beginning. "Aw, right! That's what I like to see! But for _that_ amount, I'm only gonna do my moves!"

"That's what we're paying to see," "father" said.

"Pose! Stick your chest and ass out!" "son" said, pointing in two different directions.

"I'm a _martial artist!_ I ain't doin' it!"

"Then, we're taking our money back!"

"The bowl won't like it."

"The bowl...or _you?_ "

"Both. But mainly the bowl. I wouldn't touch it if I were you." And she gave him a great, big _I Dare You_ stare.

The two backed down. But they were too big of a pair of perverts to leave. Ranma would be in their fantasies tonight. She shuddered as if she _could_ see them.

A woman and her friend, who apparently knew the two men, put in 500 yen between them. "You go ahead and be a martial artist!" ,

"And the best of luck to you," her friend said, looking over her shoulder at the group of teenagers.

"Don't worry! I can take care of myself!"

Since it was the time of day when there were mostly women about, Ranma didn't have to do any cheap moves that highlighted her cursed assets. Ranma did her standard moves, but _did_ display her strength and speed! She hit her hand with a resounding smack and whipped the air with her kicks. There was applause. And there was more money in the bowl.

And then there wasn't! The sneaky "son" had either tried to get his money back or actually _steal_ the whole amount! The Saotome Special Bowl did what it was designed to do.

When _any_ weight was taken out of it, its trigger was released.

It collapsed back into concentric rings - But not before the spring that was its bottom sent all the coins and bills flying in all directions!

Ranma kicked up the nearest coin that had not landed and punched it!

The 10-yen coin hit the man and he fell to the pavement! And there he cowered, awaiting his fate.

Before she could yell at him, the teenagers made their move. "We hear you'll fight _anybody_."

"For 2,000 yen." She kept her outward calm. She was sure these were the standard jerks she had met at all the boys' schools she had been to. _These_ didn't like a girl thinking she was better than they were.

"That means you _won't_ fight us if we don't pay you!" said the joker of the group. His buddies laughed, too.

Ranma turned to the anxious gathering. "If _they_ start the fight, I get to _keep_ all the money they got, right?"

"Hey!"

Ranma turned back to their big, "bad" leader. "I'm here to make money," the little redhead smiled. "I'm just makin' it clear I ain't stealin' when I take all your money."

He swung first! She didn't return in kind. She dodged and retreated. The joker went to grab her. She ducked and came up near a third of the gang. He, too, was more interested in molesting her than fighting her. He didn't get the opportunity. And on she went. She gave all five of them their chance.

"Now that all of you have agreed to the rules of this fight, I'll defeat you!"

The _all_ came at her from all directions!

[][][]

It was a short fight that got the applause of the gathering, especially the first two women. Besides the 4,750 yen she collected from the pockets and wallets from the pile of boys, those two also gave her 1,000 yen more than the 500 they had contributed earlier. How much money did that make she had all together?

She didn't have the time to find out!

A bag of money was thrown down into her collapsed bowl.

"2,000 yen! Ranma fight! No run!"

"Sha,Sham, Shampoo!"

Her chui came crashing down and cracking the pavement!

 _What was Ranma to do?!_ Ever since she ran from her back in her village - Ever she ran from her throughout China - Her Pop sensei always telling her to run - She'd been a GIRL! The kind of girl her stupid Old Man had conditioned her to think girls were like!

The purple-haired amazon landed on the street before her. "Ranma no run! Say will fight all ones that challenge!"

Aaa! She had trapped herself! Ranma Saotome _never_ turned down a challenge!

As Shampoo reached for the solid metal mace, Ranma jumped on its colorful surface. Now, the girl had only _one_.

She brought this one down to bash her head in!

Ranma caught it just in time! "Sh, Shampoo, can't we talk?!" Where _was_ her confidence!?

"Talk Chinese! That language of land Ranma dishonor Shampoo!"

The amazon was surprised to see, and feel, her victim slip out from under her chui, then slip _on top_ of it! The redhead used her 100 lb, 45 kg, weight to slam that chui down onto the one still on the ground. And she remained on them both!

"Yeah, that's a problem. I don't know Chinese and you barely know Japanese. But can't we _still_ find a way to be friends?" The redhead in her put on her most adorable face, complete with the hands balled up under her chin.

"Ranma no know honor!"

"Hey! I do to!" The act was over. But she was _still_ intimidated by the powerful girl!

Suddenly, she was lifted in the air by the strong, strong amazon lifting both Ranma and a mace by its handle!

Ranma reached down and picked the other chui by its handle. _Now_ , Shampoo had difficulty with the weight of all three of them.

And Ranma was in the perfect position to bash _her_ head in!

Or so the amazon thought. Ranma didn't fight like that. Instead, she hugged the ball to her.

Shampoo dropped the first chui and grabbed the second out of her opponent's hand.

There was, again, the sound of iron dank and deck against concrete. And a small squeak. There was an idea!

Ranma's foot landed solidly on the handle She kicked the head away from its handle, sending it rolling.

" _Please_ , Shampoo, don't make me break the other one, too!"

Shampoo eyed the tribe heirloom and the enemy of her clan who had damaged it!

She thrust her remaining mace straight at her! She would turn her insides into jelly!

But the smaller girl lifted her feet off the ground and cradled the metal ball to her belly, riding the chui.

The amazon brought her weapon back, getting her enemy close enough to deliver a killer blow to the face-

Stretching a little, the redhead kissed her. On the nose. She didn't know why. It just seemed the girl-thing to do.

Ranma landed, ready to continue the fight. She didn't want to. She wanted to, again, run-

Shampoo dropped her weapon, teared up...and ran!

"What? I won? How?"

[][][]

A black-haired boy in Chinese clothes left the public bathhouse. "Now, I can take the money I earned today and eat!" Not only had he have the 6,830 yen from busking, the 2,000 yen from Shampoo, but people had paid him 960 yen for the 'show' he and Shampoo had put on. He probably would have gotten more, if it had lasted longer.

"Where should I eat? I'm dippin' too much into the _ki_ reservoir. I need to get a lot of calories in me! But I gotta watch my money. I don't really like puttin' on shows for gawkers.

"Hmph! Especially gawkers who're perverts."

"Ranma, is that _you?_ It IS!"

"A, Akane(!)?! How did you find me?! _I_ don't even know where I am!" Ranma saw she was carrying a large traveling pack!

"She found you because of me, of course," said Ryoga, coming around a corner. Hearing their voices had set him on the right course. He, too, had a pack.

"The guy that gets lost finds me 'cuz I'm lost? It makes sort of stupid sense."

"Hey, you're the one that said I got superior tracking ability!"

[][][]

"You two had better go. I'm just gonna lose you, again," Ranma said around his third order of sushi spicy roll.

"And I'll find you again. You can't lose this lost boy!" Ryoga said, more mannerly eating his tempura fried eel.

Akane had opted for a Caesar salad with lots of dressing. "You gave your _word_ , Ranma Saotome! You said you'd take me on a training trip!"

"Uh, did I, Akane? I don't remember it that way."

"What kind of sensei _are_ you going to be(!)?! The kind I've had to put up with _all_ of my life?!"

"Uh, I guess not. But, geez, training trips are not somethin' I really want no more. That's been my whole life. When I came to your place, I had hoped I wouldn't have to. At least for a year."

"Yeah. I understand that, too well," Ryoga said. "I haven't had really haven't had a place to stay for three years. Sure, I find my way back to my folks' house, once in a while. But then I lose that, too."

"Then why don't you _both_ come back to my house! I'll settle for short training jaunts, at least until you are ready."

"With my sense of direction, they're more likely to become long journeys."

"Not if you have somebody like _me_ with you, Ryoga," Akane smiled.

Ryoga blushed.

Ranma frowned at the two.

"It's not that simple." And he actually stopped eating.

"The first reason I left was because of the boobytraps. Even if there are no more, I realized I got enemies. Like Shampoo. If she thought you were an obstacle, she wouldn't hesitate killin' you."

"But you said you defeated her!"

"I don't know _how_ I won the battle! And a warrior girl like her isn't just "defeated"! She's comin' back after me, I'm sure. She gave me the Kiss of Death!"

"And _you_ gave her the Kiss of...Something," Ryoga smiled.

"What? The kiss of "Sayonara, it's been nice knowin' you"?"

"It had to have been a meaningful kiss!" Akane insisted. "You said she cried!"

"Maybe it was a "Hi, I like the way you look" kiss(?)" Ryoga suggested. "Is this Shampoo beautiful?"

"She's tryin' to _kill me!_ I only paid attention to her to get away from her!"

"Hmm…," Akane thought. "She kissed you after you defeated her in her village. What would have happened if you had kissed her back?"

Ranma shrugged.

"Kisses are important to girls. A kiss like that would have been meaningful!"

"A kiss on the cheek would've meant _you_ gave her the Kiss of Death, wouldn't it?" Ryoga asked.

"But you didn't kiss her on the cheek. And you didn't kiss her on the lips. You kissed her on the nose." Akane was still struggling with a possible answer that remained on the tip of her tongue.

"Okay. What does it mean when somebody kisses another on the nose?" Ryoga asked.

"Intimacy!" Akane snapped her fingers. Then she pointed at Ranma, " _And_ insult! Either way, it means you didn't want to take Shampoo as a serious threat! She can either think she's been insulted.

"Or she could accept your invitation to be on intimate terms."

"Uh, how "intimate"?" Ranma swallowed without any food in his mouth.

"It depends on the dance you two do together. It could stop with you two just being good friends, or…." Akane bit her lip.

"Or?"

"You were a girl when you kissed her?"

"Yeah. So?"

"She's an amazon, in a place where women are the superior sex. Maybe isolated from their men. I wonder just how bisexual they are."

[][][]

Ranma agreed to stay with them for a while longer. He hoped Ryoga would get them lost enough for Shampoo not to find them.

"Okay. You and your dad are martial artists! What about your sisters, Kasumi and Nabiki."

"You haven't had time to see how skilled they are at _avoiding_ attacks. They are as good at _not_ getting involved in fights as you _are_ at getting into them! Trust me!"

"Well…." Since he had no plans, then, to return to test that trust, he didn't argue.

"That just leaves Mom." He stopped and looked off into the horizon. "I won't go back home. I won't let her get hurt."

"So, you won't see her _ever?_ " Akane shook her head.

Ranma wasn't ready to deal with that issue. He changed to another.

"I told you my first reason for leavin' was to protect the people I care about. The second also is about that. But it's more about me.

"My life has been gettin' complicated. And it's only gonna get more complicated when more people know about my curse. I'm afraid I'm gonna become famous! It really scares me!"

"You, Ranma Saotome, afraid? You always bragged you weren't afraid of anything," Ryoga said.

"I _ain't!_ If I can deal with it by martial arts!" Or his opponent isn't a bloodthirsty amazon berserker!

"Only how do you fight fame? The more I fight, the more famous I'll become."

"That's what you wanted!" Ryoga said, remembering their school days. "That's what we both wanted!"

"But I'm a guy who becomes a girl! People'll want me to _be_ a girl! Maybe I can be a girl who does martial artist, but I'll be a girl before that to them!"

"Ranma!" Akane became excited! "Become famous! Then prove to everybody that a _girl can be a martial artist!_ A serious, dangerous martial artist!"

"Akane, that would prove nothin'. I'm not a born-girl. It's girls like _you_ that's gotta prove that to people."

"Ranma…." Again she was touched by the faith he showed in her abilities.

Then she full of determination, "I need to go on training missions."

"Let's not go back to that, yet, Akane!"

"I think I recognize this place," Ryoga said after they had turned yet another corner.

They had come to the place from a direction Akane and Ranma didn't normally go. But they were now standing in front of a very familiar place.

It was Dr. Tofu's clinic.

[][][]

"So, you're Ryoga Hibiki, and you have a congenital condition that gives you little sense of direction. Is that correct, Hibiki-san?" the doctor asked.

"Yes, Doctor. And call me Ryoga. I don't have many that will call me a friendly name."

" _And_ he turns into a pig," Ranma said.

"A cute, little, black pig!" Akane said. "Perfect for cuddling with!"

"Akane, we need to talk," Dr. Tofu told her.

"Another one?" Akane smiled. "I just love hearing you talk, Dr. Tofu!" So much so, she seldom heard what he actually was trying to say.

"Your mother was here, earlier, Ranma. I'm not sure I convinced her that my prescription was right for you. But by staying a girl, you can learn to keep most of your manliness by understanding the differences. And _not_ the false premises you father has passed on to you. The differences between the two genders are not as great as their similarity. The differences are a matter of perspective. And they are both vital in the scheme of things. Each gender has its value. _You_ are in a unique position to find the balance between them, and make the best use of whichever one a situation calls for. You would, then, truly be the Master of Anything-Goes."

"That's a sample of what you said to Mom? Man, I ain't sure she _can_ accept that.

"And right now, I'm beginning to doubt it, myself.

"I don't wanna become famous, Doc! Not as a girl! People'll want me to _be_ a girl! I'm havin' trouble _not bein'_ a girl! You don't know how hard it is to be a guy with girl memories! It can make me feel...sick."

"You've only been using my prescription for four days. I have already noticed an improved stability in your condition. Remember what you were like when you came to me after that first day at school? The more often you are a girl, the more you will be able to come to terms with it.

"Then, there will come a time when you freely choose which form you want to be in at the moment. You will choose the male, of course. But there _will_ be times when you think your female body is the better choice."

"I'm not gonna argue about that. I'm gonna leave for good unless I can find a way _not_ to become famous!"

Dr. Tofu smiled broadly. "Then there is no reason for you to leave, Ranma. You _won't_ become famous."

"What?!" the three others asked in disbelief.

"Let me ask you, how famous is Jusenkyo?"

[][][]

Three teens left the clinic together, a boy and two girls.

"Why would anybody _want to_ become a pig!?" Ryoga cried.

"There are springs that turn people into _other_ animals," Akane reminded him. "And there are some people who would _rather_ be a cool animal than an uncool human."

"Yeah. I guess. I've met a lot of weird people in my travels."

"And the Doc said there are more _guys_ that wanna become girls than anything else." Ranma was still having a hard time wrapping her head around that.

"Dr. Tofu is right. Those types of men would stop at nothing if they thought they could become a _real_ girl just by adding water."

" _And_ they wouldn't be stuck with it," Ryoga said. "They could always change their minds and bodies and go back to being a guy.

"As long as they don't have cold water hit them."

"And let's not forget girls!" Akane said. "Ayane said it, back when she was at my house. There are girls who would kill for a body like this redheaded one, Ranma."

"And, yet, it's not famous. Nobody knows about the Valley of Cursed Springs. Nobody that's not meant to be cursed." The short redhead walked taller. "It's a Training Ground because it is meant only for those who _can_ become martial artist worthy to be cursed."

"Yeah!" Ryoga smiled, feeling taller, himself.

But he remembered being a _little_ pig. "I don't think I want to be worthy."

[][][]

One of the Tendo tall, heavy gates was on the ground, the other off its hinges!

The front door of the house was busted!

"Mom!"

"My family!"

"In here!" came the reply.

They all rushed to the common room.

"Ranma!" her mom smiled. "I'm so glad you're showing an interest in girls!"

"Ranma date Shampoo, now," said Shampoo.


	22. Chapter 24 Her Date With Shampoo

An unusual disclaimer: Ranma ½ is a trademark of Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ Communications, and its characters have been borrowed without permission. And Son Turned Daughter was originally written way back in 2002 by the FanFiction author Tangent, and his characters Megumi, Yasushi and Ayane have, likewise, been borrowed without permission. Please see the first two chapters of this story under his pen name. This story is written for non-commercial purposes only.

[][][] [][][] [][][]

Why Shampoo has suddenly decided not to kill Ranma is explained it differently at the bottom of this chapter. There are other explanations of things that happen in this chapter there, too.

[][][] [][][] [][][]

There the purple amazon was in her floral pants and top, sitting drinking tea with Ranma's mom, and Kasumi.

"Mom! Shampoo did Yama-sen Ken! She broke into the house! She can break _more_ than the house!" the redhead warned.

"Are you here to steal, Shampoo?" Nodoka asked.

"Shampoo no thief! Shampoo only here for face back!"

"Oh, dear. How did you lose face, child."

"Shampoo no child! Shampoo best warrior of age group!" Then she glared at the redhead. "Until Ranma best Shampoo in front of all of village! Shampoo give Ranma Kiss of Death! Swear to find Ranma and kill! If take whole life, Shampoo can no return with honor to village until Ranma dead! Great shame and punishment if Shampoo return."

"Oh, dear. And, yet, you still wish to date my son?"

"No son. Ranma! Ranma take face of Shampoo!" Her tone softened. "Now Ranma give back face."

"I wish I understood," Ranma said.

"I think I understand," her mother said. "I was an outcast from my clan, too, for marrying your father, Genma. I was shown mercy only when he left me. And yet they have never entirely forgiven me. My face is incomplete."

'Is true! Ranma give part of Shampoo face back. Even if tribe no give face back, Shampoo maybe find new face. More happy face? Shampoo no know now."

And she looked directly at the redhead. "Ranma date Shampoo, now."

"Be careful, Ranma," Akane said. "It sounds like a trap. When you're not looking, she'll make her move."

"Then Shampoo lose face again. Was many time in hunt Shampoo could kill Ranma that way. No honor in sneak attack! No is trap!"

"And if this... _date_ don't work out?" Ranma asked.

"Then Shampoo challenge Ranma again! Win back face." Her voice lowered and saddened. "Or no have face again."

"Aw, geez!"

"Go take a bath and prepare for your date, son," Nodoka said.

"Shampoo take bath, too!" she said, getting up.

"Shampoo! I can't let you take a bath with you. There's, there's something you don't know about me!"

"Ranma change to girl? Shampoo know that." And she pointed to Akane, "Shampoo hear loud, long-hair girl say name of Ranma! Shampoo then stay close and hear many thing. Then follow but lose until find stickboy with big picture of Ranma."

"And you say you don't sneak."

"Shampoo no sneak attack when goal is maim, kill! Shampoo give shampoo for what loud girl think of Shampoo! Okay Shampoo sneak attack, then!"

"Akane's my friend, Shampoo! If you wanna be my friend, you got to leave her alone!"

Nodoka intervened by changing the topic. "Shampoo, if I may ask, I am Ranma's mother, and _I_ still find it difficult to believe my son can become a girl. How can you accept that he does so easily?"

"Village of Shampoo at way out of Valley of Cursed Springs. Shampoo see many thing and people come out different. Shampoo just no sure how curse work. Is big secret in village! All stay away from springs. Only ones punished go there!"

"The curse works by turning my _son_ into a girl," Nodoka said with great dignity. "Ranma _is_ a man, and he will go on this...date of yours _as_ a man."

"No! Must be girl-type Ranma! Face different for boy and girl! Shampoo want face from face who take Shampoo face away!"

"I think she means what the Doc was tellin' you about, Mom. A guy brain and a girl brain are different. A girl with a girl can be more friendly, with less complications, than a girl with a guy."

"Is true! Village would demand Shampoo marry guy-type Ranma. Village no demand if Ranma girl-type."

"Mom didn't you say you found me because a guy called Chance told you where I lived? Did he tell you he was workin' for a guy who wanted me to be his _wife_? They even had a betrothal contract I was expected to honor!"

"Hey! I was trying to take your place, you know!" Akane reminded. "My dad signed the _same_ contract!"

"Oh, dear! When Genma gets back from wherever he and Mr. Tendo ran off to, I shall certainly discuss _that_ with them!"

"I don't wanna risk gettin' engaged again. You don't know what Shampoo's like when she wants somethin'.

"Shampoo, I'll go on this "date" with you. As a girl."

[][][]

While Akane and Kasumi filled his mom in on Picolet Chardin III and the Battle of Fine Dining Schools, Ranma went to clean up for the date.

But, first, they had to try and reassure the woman it was alright for Ranma to see a nude girl. "As long as Ranma's a girl!"

[][][]

Shampoo was already nude and in the hot furo tub when the redhead entered, nude herself. Ranma hesitated. Not so much because the girl was nude (at the moment, the side of the tub was hiding her boobs and the rest), but because the amazon still intimidated her. She hated it, but there it was. She had become like cats to her, only a _little_ less frightening.

"Body of Ranma no like face of Ranma. Ranma have cute face. Ranma have no cute body."

"What(!)?! You sayin' this body isn't cute?" That was the first time anybody had said _that_ to her!

Shampoo moved in the tub to where more of her could be seen. "Chest of Shampoo more big," she said proudly.

Ranma stood there looking.

Then she took her eyes away, frowning. "It's not like these are mine." She sat on the shower stool. " I didn't _choose_ to have this body. I didn't choose to be cursed to be a girl."

"Shampoo no choose be girl. No choose be born in Joketsuzoku. Shampoo no choose be warrior." Then her fist came down on the tub. "Shampoo choose be best!"

"Aw, man!" Ranma said, picking up the shower wand. She had been using the curse as an excuse. And, now,...

Ranma turned on the cold water.

"Ranma choose be best, too, no?"

"Of _course_ , I'm the best -Cold! This is too cold!" And she adjusted the taps.

"Then why Ranma run from Shampoo?!"

"Pop started it! I never ran from nothin' before in my life! But that's when the Old Man started treatin' me like a girl. _His_ idea of a girl!"

She lathered the body she was in. "It wasn't until we were out of China and back in Japan before I beat enough sense in him for him to begin treatin' me like he did before."

She stopped, and hung her hands from her thighs. "But he can't! I'm "contaminated" or something. To him, bein' a girl is more than just a curse. It's a punishment. And he wants to punish me until I don't wanna be a girl. So, what does he do? He registers me at school _as_ a girl!"

Ranma straightened up and continued soaping her body again. "I've showed him! I stuck it out as a girl at school!" She smiled, "It's driving him crazy! And the best part is, maybe, it isn't drivin' _me_ crazy. I'm learnin' about a girl's, and a guy's, brain and body more and faster than if I tried to stay a guy. It's trainin'!"

"Then Ranma no run from being girl? Ranma be girl?" Shampoo said, still ogling the redhead.

"That's what the Doc said. There're times when I bein' a girl is the best choice. -Cold!" The little redhead was glad she _was_ little then. She was able to spray off the soap faster.

"Ranma give Shampoo soap, now."

"What?" she looked at the girl reaching out for it. "Shampoo, a furo is _not_ a bathtub. You're supposed to wash _before_ you get in."

"Aiya! Then Shampoo get out!" And she rose, the hot water cascading down her amazon curves.

It wasn't until Ranma realized she had naturally purple hair that she looked away. "Here! Take the soap!"

When she did, Ranma headed for the door. "I'm gettin' dried and dressed!"

"No need for hot bath after shower?" Shampoo received no answer.

[][][]

Back in her Chinese outfit, Ranma found his mom, in her kimono, waiting for her in the common room. "I am glad to see _that_ didn't take long."

"Me, too," Akane frowned.

"I told you Little Sister was a good girl," Kasumi said.

" "Little Sister"?" Nodoka raised an eyebrow.

"And when Ranma is a boy, Little Brother is a good boy, Auntie Saotome," Kasumi continued smiling, unchanged.

"Just be _sure_ you remain a good girl or boy," Akane told Ranma.

"And you be sure you and "Burin- _chan_ "... Where _is_ Ryoga? He get lost from just goin' from the front door(?)" As soon as he asked, Ranma knew that was the answer.

"Is that what you're going to wear on a _date_?" her mom asked. "Don't you have anything nicer? More appropriate for a date?"

"Oh, my, yes, Auntie Saotome. We have a living room full of new outfits for Ranma," Kasumi said.

" _And me_ , let's not forget!" Akane reminded.

"Kasumi, I don't think this is the time for Mom to see them!" Ranma warned.

[][][]

"That's my dress, Mrs. Saotome," Akane told the woman holding up the bright yellow dress with the accordion pleats.

"And which of these dresses are my son's?"

"None of them are! I don't wear dresses!" Ranma insisted.

"The more subdued colors are Ranma's things, Auntie Saotome."

The mother held up a black skirt. "This is yours, Son? And it isn't a dress?"

"It's a cu-lotta, or something, and it's _pants!_ _Shorts_ with wide _legs!_ " Ranma looked, and found, "See!? _Pants!_ "

"A little unmanly, aren't they?" Nodoka said, eying their stretchy and tapered they were.

"Auntie Saotome, because of Ranma's condition, he must have a more unisex look," Kasumi explained. "And because he is known to those he goes to school with as a girl, the clothes they see his girl body in should seem acceptable for a girl."

"There has already been trouble at school when Ranma wore unacceptable clothes, Mrs. Saotome!" Akane told her.

"But now I'm fittin' in better, Mom! I _ain't_ gonna be a girl, but I got friends who're girls! _Friends!_ I don't wanna give them up! I'd hafta if they knew I was a guy!"

"A boy and a girl can be friends." But as soon as she said it, Nodoka questioned her own words.

" _Just_ friends? No complications? No one thinkin' they gotta be somethin' _else_? I _ain't_ ready for somethin' else! I barely know what a friend is, or how to _be_ a friend, what with Pop jerkin' me all around on his trainin' trips every time he got into trouble! I _need_ it simple. For now. And even simple is complicated!"

Nodoka thought. Then said, "Instead of having friends who are girls, why not be a boy with friends who are boys?" That certainly seemed the more sensible solution.

"Boys are perverts," Akane told her. "The boys are our school are! I can just see them finding out about the curse. They'll want to be friends, alright, "friends" with Ranma's girl body."

"But if the girls at your school found out about the curse - Oh, Dear!"

"We don't have time for that, Mom. I gotta get ready. I don't know why Shampoo hasn't come outta the bath room, yet," Ranma said.

"She was on the road for how long, Ranma? She must be appreciating a relaxing hot soak," Kasumi said.

Nodoka's back stiffened when she saw what Ranma was wearing underneath her Chinese clothes. It was a silk chemise top and tap panties. Not underwear, but lingerie! "Not manly!"

"All the women at the women's apparel shop thought _he_ , _Romeo_ was very manly!" Akane came to her Ranma's aid.

"My _son_ wore _that_ in a shop that sells _lingerie(!)?_ "

"Ranma! I'll get the hot water, and you can show her!" Akane said. "Do whatever it was you did that got all the women gaga for you!"

"Are you saying women are actually attracted to my son even when he's-"

"Nihao! Shampoo ready!" The tall and quite curvy amazon girl bounced into the living room in just her floral, Chinese blouse that barely reached her thighs.

Nodoka's hand went out to Akane's arm, saying, " _Don't_ bring the hot water."

Then, she addressed Shampoo, "I hope you are wearing panties, young woman."

"Why Shampoo wear panties? No is panties day for Shampoo."

[][][]

Ranma had been banished from the living room. It was Akane who brought out the green blouse and black pants for her to wear on the "date". And, then, Akane, too, was not allowed back inside while the two gentler woman battled to get the warrior girl more "decent".

"Your second date, and I won't be on it," Akane frowned. "And, like you said after our first date, that wasn't even _our_ first date. We were dating other people."

"And _yours_ was with a girl," Ranma smiled. But Akane didn't think it was funny. "And, now, I'm havin' _my_ date with a girl as a girl. So, we still haven't done a real, proper date. You know, where you get to date a guy, and I get to date a girl as a guy."

She'd finished buttoning the blouse, and had been standing there in front of her while they had been talking. Akane finally had to straighten the redhead's collar.

Akane was very close to her as she said, "Did I tell you I kissed Burin-chan?"

"What!?"

Ranma took her arm as she tried to back away. "I was afraid my first kiss would be with a guy I didn't want to kiss. Then I kissed a guy I _hadda_ kiss. _My_ choice, and to save girls from him.

"Aw, this isn't comin' out like the way I wanna say. What I _want_ to say is, we're gonna go on a date soon as we can! Just you and me, girl and guy, with me the guy."

Akane smiled, a tear in her eye. "You did say it right. You dating Shampoo because you have to. But you _want_ to date me."

"Right! And we gotta do it before somethin' happens that makes it not our First, Real Date."

"Oh, Ranma," Akane lowered her head towards the little redhead's face, her lips ready. She closed her eyes, and whispered, "My Romeo."

"Shampoo ready now! Shampoo guess," she announced. Bouncing into the common room. She was wearing a light blue blouse and darker blue pants. They were part of Ranma's ensemble.

Akane pulled away from the redhead.

Feeling awkward she searched for something to say. "The clothes, they fit."

"Yeah. The clothes in there fit me even if I'm a guy."

Shampoo frowned. "Ranma say clothes for guy?"

"No! The clothes also fit me when I'm a girl. Let's just say they're, uh, special."

Shampoo smiled. "Ranma give Shampoo own special clothes! Haiyah!"

"Okay, let's get this date over with."

Shampoo was frowning again. "Date no over when date over. Take more than one date give back face of Shampoo."

"Remember what I said about the dance you're going to have to do, Ranma?" Akane said. "Be careful!" It was _her_ turn to frown. "You don't want her to want to be _too_ intimate with you."

Ranma sighed. "But intimate enough for her to want to be friends." Whether she wanted the amazon to be her friend or not, it was either that or having a blood-thirsty enemy, again.

"Okay. What do we do on this "date"? The only date I been on was two days ago, and Kuno was footin' the bill. I don't even have much of the money I got buskin' today left."

"Oh, my, I am sure, what Shampoo wants is not bought with money, Ranma," Kasumi said.

"Oh, dear, yes. Though you will do well to think of treating your future dates to the best dates you can afford, Son," Nodoka said.

Kasumi looked at the woman. "Uh, yes."

She turned back to the others, "The purpose of a true date is for the two to become better acquainted. Then you can move on to become a true couple. Each date is a step towards establishing a greater intimacy with one another."

"See, Ranma!" Akane said.

"Aiya! Is true! The more intimacy Ranma give Shampoo, the more face Shampoo have!"

"Oh, Dear!" , "Oh, My!"

"Don't even _think_ about having Ranma give you a complete face, Shampoo!" Akane yelled.

"People have dirty mind!" But it Shampoo had the look of somebody with a dirty mind.

"Okay. I still don't know what we're supposed to do."

"Sharing a common interest is a good start," Kasumi advised.

"Ranma and Shampoo go place where people battle!"

"I don't think there _are_ any scheduled for today," Akane said. "Will you settle for sumo pigs?"

"Shampoo no want see pig!" Her frown was replaced with a more dreamy look, "Maybe there place where Ranma and Shampoo can spar?"

"Oh, my!" Kasumi smiled. "We _do_ have our own dojo!"

"No!" Akane screamed! "That's skipping ahead! _That_ kind of intimacy _has to_ come later! Later! No touching!"

"Then what do we do?" Ranma asked.

"Talk! Just talk! Get to know each other! By talking!" Akane told them.

"Shampoo can barely speak Japanese," Ranma told her.

"There's always body language," Kasumi grinned.

"Aiya! _Body_ language!"

"May I make a suggestion?" Nodoka asked. "I understand there's a flower show at the Nerima Arena. Flowers are always good on a date."

"Hmph! Shampoo no like flowers!" the amazon said, crossing her arms. "Remind Shampoo of childhood enemy!"

"Yeah, flowers don't cut it for me, too," Ranma said.

"There! You have a common interest already," Kasumi said.

[][][]

But there was nothing else to do in Nerima this Monday. And Nodoka Saotome was a member of the Kita Women's Art & Culture Group and had coupons that she was sure could get them in to see the show at a price she could afford. The only problem with that was that to use them _she_ had to attend with them.

At least it was only her that went with the two on their date. They left with Kasumi promising she would keep Akane home.

As was the way of Nerima, they walked. But Ranma and Shampoo added rooftop jumping, looking for the fastest way to the center for a middle-aged woman who merely walked.

During their times on the ground together, Nodoka tried to sustain a conversation. "I had not thought of it, but it is well that your date be chaperoned, Ranma - Oh! And yours, as well, Shampoo."

"Shampoo understand being guarded. Is always guards on duty at village of Shampoo." She understood but didn't seem happy about it.

Ranma, for her part, was glad she was glad she wasn't going to be left alone with the amazon who still intimidated her too much to feel much intimacy with. She just wished that somebody wasn't her mom. If Shampoo did a 180 and became the warrior girl again, then her mom could be in danger!

Still, "I wasn't expectin' to be able to spend more time with you while datin', Mom. You bein' this chaperon-whatever is okay in that way."

"Chaperons have become terribly old-fashioned. _I_ was only allowed to date if I had one. My first and only unchaperoned dates were with your father, Ranma." And she winked at her.

Ranma wondered about his mom's definition of "date". Did pop have to burgle her house every time he wanted to see her?

"But enough about me. This date is about you young people. Shampoo has told me something about how you two met."

"No talk of dishonor of Shampoo! Shampoo here for face back!"

"Yeah, Mom. And we have never talked before today. Only words she ever said to me were in Chinese."

"No is true! Shampoo always say, "Ranma, no run! Fight Shampoo!"

"I told you, Shampoo! It was Pop's idea! I ain't runnin' no more! I didn't run when you challenged me today, did I?!"

"Aiya! That when Shampoo know you is, indeed, warrior of honor! Kiss you give Shampoo have no meaning until Ranma prove Ranma has honor!"

"Ranma kissed you, Shampoo?"

"On the nose, Mom! On the nose! It was a _friendly_ kiss only!"

"First two enemy. Then truce. Then maybe two friend. Then maybe two...Hai~ya!"

"There isn't gonna be no "Haiya"!"

"Then truce over?"

" "Then maybe two friends"," Ranma suggested.

Ranma didn't think she was really listening to her. She was singing a little ditty to herself, " _Tell me what's in your heart. That's a good place to start…"_

[][][]

"Oh, dear. The center seems further away than I thought. Let me rest here."

"I'll carry you, Mom!" Ranma said, and did that before she could say anything!

Not having to walk at a civilian's pace, Ranma was able to race down the streets. She was proud of being able to show her mom just how strong and athletic she was, despite the handicap this body gave her compared to her male body.

Ranma had picked her up so surprisingly sudden Nodoka hadn't really had time to react. She watched the world go by in a blur, preferring to disbelieve her own senses rather than risk accepting what they told her was her reality.

"Ranma! Look-see!" Shampoo cried.

Ranma immediately halted, alert for the danger. "Where?! What do you see, Shampoo?!"

"Shampoo see Shampoo get in race, too! *Giggle*" she said, snatching the woman from the redhead's arms.

"Shampoo! That's _My Mom_ you're runnin' off with!" she cried, racing after her.

[][][]

"Cash only," the man behind the arena's ticket booth said. "Those coupons may get you in the Nerima Cultural Center, but not here. Next!"

"Oh, dear," Nodoka sighed. "Here I have my credit cards and coupons in my sachet and they're not accepted. We came all this way for no reason."

Then a shrill girl spoke, "You, there! The red-haired dyke that dared to kiss me in public!"

"Romeo's Mother, you have already met Mistress Kodachi," Sasuke the ninja said.

"Romeo? Oh, yes! My son." And, yes, she remembered the girl with the black roses. How could she!? As she understood it, _she_ was the reason the girl with the white lilies had almost killed Ranma!

"And, Mistress, the "red-haired dyke" has the name _Ranma Saotome_. I do not know the name of this other girl."

"Name is Shampoo of Joketsuzoku, and tribe of great warrior womens!"

"Warrior woman, are you? Then you are _perfect_ for a dyke like _her!_ She made the base assumption that I kissed women for my enjoyment!"

"Oh, dear!" Nodoka frowned at her Ranma, remembering the promiscuous reputation both her son and this version of her son had been getting.

"I see you two are _dressed_ as dykes, as well."

"Shampoo no like annoying girl!"

"You and me both, Shampoo. Kodachi! What are you doin' here(!)? Do you want to fight?!" And Ranma slipped into the starting pose.

"You really are an imbecile, aren't you? I am the Black Rose. Of _course_ , I would be interested in a flower show. Especially a _Trade Show of Dangerous and Cursed Plants_. Ohohohoho!"

It wasn't the shrill laugh that sent a shudder through Shampoo. "Ranma! Mother of Ranma! Leave! Go! Shampoo no go inside!"

"No way! I gotta see why Kodachi wants those plants!"

"I'll show you which ones I have _after_ I purchase them. Expect to see them when you do not expect to see them! Ohohohoho!" And she walked away from them and into the arena.

"I just gotta get in there! I just gotta! Kodachi is like _all_ the Kunos: Bad News!"

"May be way in on roof!"

"That'd be dishonest! And," Ranma put a protective arm around Nodoka's shoulder, "I can't leave my mom out here."

The amazon found her bravery. "Then Shampoo have no choice." Shampoo undid the top buttons of the blouse and reached into her bosom. She pulled out wad of yen bills.

Nodoka was surprised. "I _know_ you're not wearing a bra!"

"Is Secret of Dark Magic. Is how Shampoo able follow Ranma all this time."

"Man! I wish I knew that technique! Then I wouldn't have to be doin' no Saotome City Survival Techniques!"

"Shampoo only have until elders take away. Come from treasury of tribe. No like Shampoo use too much. Bookkeeper of elders very much feared."

[][][]

Nodoka found herself being carried again, as Ranma wanted to find Kodachi as soon as she could.

Shampoo agreed to split off and form a separate search. And she welcomed the thrill of the chase, again. Despite the plants.

Of course, they ended up on the field area of the arena. But from different directions.

Most noticeable was the potted black cherry tree. There was spring weather in this part of Japan and it was still in bloom. It was the very symbol of love. And of the Hanami, the Cherry Blossom Festival.

In fact, there were people on blankets crowded around it, eating and drinking sake or beer! Those drunk enough, got up and recited poetry or sang songs.

Or haikus, "Requited love that make all unrequited!"

"Very good, Soun!" Genma clapped.

"Yes, it was, was it not(?) I still have it," the man blushed modestly.

"This is where you two went!" yelled Ranma.

"What?" they tried to focus.

"Husband!"

"Nodoka!" , "Mrs. Saotome!" Both were now on their feet and sobering up.

"You take care of them, Mom, I gotta find Kodachi!"

"Genma, Tendo, you're staying with me and help me find a certain girl!"

[][][]

Shampoo overheard two mushroom farmers talking.

" _Toshi no kazu dake_? That seems a strange thing to call your crop."

" _Only a number of years_ is what I call it 'cuz that's what it gives!"

"Why not call them something like, uh, Mushrooms of Time!"

"Because people'd think it'd give 'em _more_ time, not less! You get the number of years as the mushroom you ate is long in centimeters!"

"Then, how about Aging Mushrooms?"

"Because, you idiot, people'd think they'd age you! You'd hafta eat a mushroom of mine that's longer in centimeters, than you are in years to get older! You know how difficult it is to even _get_ one that'd make you, say, 16-years old!? Over 6 inches!"

"Well, why not use what's being sold over there. _Demon's Own Fertilizer_! It's guaranteed to speed up the growth of any plant and make them giant sized!"

"Beg pardon! Shampoo hear if _Demon's Own Fertilizer_ is added, get 300-inch mushroom? Then Shampoo eat and change into 300-year-old elder?! Aiya!"

"A beautiful girl like you doesn't want to turn into a shriveled up old crone! Buy one of my kairaishi mushrooms! They let you give a post-hypnotic command over anybody that eats one!"

"Shampoo more interested in being 300-year-old elder for 300 year!"

[][][]

Ranma's trained senses picked up the sound of muffled bullets being rattled by other bullets!

But louder was the attempt at laughing of the man near it. "Ha, ha, he, ha! I have a _Demon Attacker Bean!_ Once common, now rare! Ha, ha, he, ha! They did such a _fantastic_ job getting rid of demons people forgot about demons and no longer needed the bean! Ha, ha, He, Ha, Ha!" This last laugh was nearing hysteria.

On his display table was a case of bullet-proof glass held together by a riveted, metal frame. And the glass was cracking and the rivets threatening to pop. it jumped and rattled on the table as the green "peas" inside were violently jostled after the sound of yet another "bullet" striking them from beneath the pile that was filling up the case.

"This thing looks dangerous!" Ranma said.

"Of course it's dangerous! Demons are dangerous! This bean fights fire with firepower!"

The vendor next to it said, "But is it dangerous _enough!?_ What will happen when my _Demon's Own Fertilizer_ is added to it?"

The laughing man threw himself against the case to protect it from the man with the bottle! "Are you Crazy! Ha, ha, he, Ha! It'll destroy all those bottles and _then_ ," he stopped laughing as great quivers of fear went through him, "Then the fertilizer will get on its seeds!"

He wailed in terror, "We'll have Giant, Demon, Demon Attacking Beans!"

And the case jumped more and more cracks appeared in it! And the cracking was getting louder!

Ranma saw the large, metal, luggage trunk with labels warning, _Do Not Open! Shotgun Bean Plant!_ She picked up the bullet-proof glass case and opened the trunk! She had to open two more before she could drop the case in and close all of the trunks around it.

"Why'd'you bring this dangerous thing here(!)?!" she yelled.

"Because this is _where_ dangerous plants are shown! I paid too much money for this rare plant! I want it back! _Plus_ what it'll take to pay for all the damage it's caused me!"

Ranma growled. But turned her anger on the other guy. "Why're _you_ sellin' stuff that turns plants into demon plants?!"

"I have my business license! And as long as I follow _Truth in Advertising_ Rules, I can!"

Ranma growled again. A greatly frustrated one. The Something wouldn't let her close this creep down.

She at least knew why Kodachi was here! It'd be just _like_ her to want to turn her black roses into monster plants!

But _why_ wasn't she _here_ yet?! She didn't think Kodachi had had enough time to have bought her bottles of evil and left already. So, Ranma crossed her arms over her boobs and waited.

"Man what sell _Demon's Own Fertilizer_?! Shampoo like buy!"

"Shampoo!" Ranma screamed at her.

"Ranma here? Buy, too? Be elders together?"

"I don't want _nobody_ buyin' none of this stuff! But at least, I can see that Kodachi doesn't!"

"Hmph! Is true! Outsider culture is youth-centered! Better be elder."

"Shampoo, I got _no_ idea what you're talkin' about!"

"Me talk about mushrooms!"

"Yes, Miss Shampoo! Buy my _Demon's Own Fertilizer_ and your mushrooms will be as tall as trees! Redwoods! And will spread their spores of destruction far and wide!"

"Hmph! All change to elders? Where honor in that!? Elders should be rare! Like-" Shampoo was startled by the sound of muffled bullets behind her. She turned and stared a large, metal trunk rattling around on the floor.

"Ranma! Shampoo!" Nodoka called out to them. "We've found the girl you're after!"

[][][]

They found Genma and Soun down on another part of the arena floor. On each of them were dozens of ginger-like things that sort of looked like little people.

The vendor was telling an interested passerby, "See? You do not _need_ _Demon's Own Fertilizer_ with these mandrake roots! Their seeds have been carefully treated so they _do not_ become any taller!"

"But what if I _do_ want them bigger?"

"Look, see how well they work _this_ way! Body heat makes them grow at fantastic speed! They become so dense and heavy they keep the body down to absorb _more_ of the heat…"

"Husband! You let the girl and her ninja escape with her purchase!" Nodoka scolded.

"Mrs. Saotome, didn't you hear from this vendor how these plants work? We just heard it _now!_ "

"We had no idea how anything-goes plants can be, Nodoka, _Sweatheart, Dearest!_ "

"Kodachi got away!" Ranma cried in frustration. She turned to the vendors along this row of tables. "What did she buy(!)?! What?! Tell me!"

"The girl with the ninja? She bought from me! I sold her the _Male Flower of Weakness_!"

"Oh, dear! Am I to understand that this blossom makes a man weak? What happens if a female is affected by one?"

"The makes the woman as weak as a woman!"

"Sold!"

"Nodoka!" , "Mrs. Saotome!" , "Mom!"

"Shampoo want know what _Female Flower of Weakness_ do."

"It makes her as big of an idiot as her husband?" Nodoka joked.

"Yes, Ma'am."

"Don't forget me! That girl also bought from me! I sell the _Female Flower of Love!_ "

"Shampoo buy!"

"Well, Genma, will you be buying me a flower?"

"No. I'm going to be getting too much love from you as it is," he grumbled.

"Some help here?" pleaded Soun, like Genma, he still had the mandrakes on him.

"I also sell the antidote!" the mandrake vendor said.

[][][]

Getting up in the roof beams high above the arena floor, Ranma's trained senses could find no trace of Kodachi or Sasuke anywhere inside.

After several minutes of this, she gave up and joined everybody else.

Both her mom and Shampoo were carrying their potted plants, neither of the flowers was open, yet. They were reading their plant tags.

Or trying to. "Shampoo no can read Japanese when Japanese no use Chinese writing. No can read Japanese Chinese writing good, too."

"Let me, Dear. Hmm… Oh, Dear! Uh, maybe I had better not!"

"What!? Why no want to tell amazon woman truth?! Tell or Shampoo-"

" _I'll_ tell you!" Ranma said, taking the pot away from her mom to protect her. "It says here.

"Aw, geez! Man! It says here that, that the seeds make whoever they take root in *Gulp* _love_ bein' female."

"Or _want_ to be female if they can not _physically_ be a female, I suppose," Nodoka said.

"Now, Nodoka, Dearest, don't get any ideas!" Genma chuckled nervously.

"Stupid flowerman! Shampoo want flower for making another love Shampoo!

"Here! Shampoo trade!" And she switched plants with Nodoka before anybody could react. "Shampoo now want _Male Flower of Weakness_!"

"Gimme that!" Ranma snatched it away from _her!_ "Let's see what the instructions say on _this_ one!"

Her frown continued as she read. Then she yelled! "Geez! This is like Pop's idea of women bein' weak! Stupid plant! I oughta tear it up by the roots and rip it apart!"

"Don't, Ranma!" her mother cried. "Read where it says it reacts to male aggression!"

"I ain't a male! Not in _this_ body! Not in _this_ brain!"

The petals began to open.

[][][] [][][] [][][]

In the original _Ranma ½_ , Shampoo did a complete 180-degree turn in personality. My interpretation is that she _welcomed_ her chance to be free of her Warrior Amazon role, for a while, and to enjoy just being a young woman. In this story, she knows all at her village will be expected, by their tradition, to shun her and treat her as an outcast if she fails to kill Ranma. She _has_ no face until then. By thinking Ranma has recognized her as somebody she will _not_ shun and treat as an enemy, Shampoo has taken her chance to be free, for a while, from her role. And, by amazon logic, Ranma the Enemy would be dead, replaced by Ranma the Friend.

These _Dangerous and Cursed Plants_ ARE a part of the original _Ranma ½_ manga world. (Google and find out more.) I have added some of my own interpretations.

 _Note_ : The _Demon's Own Fertilizer_ is my own creation. I think it's the best way to explain the plants that Pink and Link use to attack Shampoo and Ranma in their manga story Arc.


	23. Chapter 25 The Curse of the Curse

An unusual disclaimer: Ranma ½ is a trademark of Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ Communications, and its characters have been borrowed without permission. And Son Turned Daughter was originally written way back in 2002 by the FanFiction author Tangent, and his characters Megumi, Yasushi and Ayane have, likewise, been borrowed without permission. Please see the first two chapters of this story under his pen name. This story is written for non-commercial purposes only.

[][][] [][][] [][][]

And the debate about Ranma's cursed form is stirred. Read my interpretation at the bottom of this chapter.

[][][] [][][] [][][]

"My Venus of the Dawn!" somebody called out, coming through the arena doors they were headed for.

Ranma had no problem realized _who_ that somebody was. Doing a rapid contortion of expressions, her face settled on a smiling one. "It's you, Kuno." It wasn't a perfect smile.

Genma did _not_ smile. He could barely control his anger. (And the dark blue _Male Flower of Weakness_ in Ranma's hands turned its unopened blossom towards him.)

" _Kuno_?" Nodoka, directly beside him, thought she had heard that name recently.

"Is stickboy who have big picture of Ranma!" Shampoo recognized the boy who had told her how to find the house the redhead was staying.

"He's Kodachi's big brother." It was hard, but Ranma managed to appear pleasant. Ranma had long sworn not to show male aggressiveness towards him because _that_ was idiot's fetish. And after meeting Kodachi in that shop, she understood _why_ and knew absolutely she would have to seem more like a girl than a guy around him. In fact, only the presence of her mom and the amazon kept her from going girly-girl on the guy. "You missed her. Your sister's no longer here, Kuno."

"I am no longer within the confines of the Kuno domicile, so there is no necessity for me to know the whereabouts of my wayward sister. I am here because it is past due my bath time and the Black Rose has appropriated the services of my manservant! I cannot wash my own back, now can I!?"

"What is it about we Japanese and our need for somebody else to wash our backs?" Nodoka shook her head. She had been forced to do without regular back washes for ten years, now. When she felt like indulging, she had used professional sansukes. But she counted her Western back scrubber implement as another small victory over her Traditionalist upbringing.

"I am so blessed to have a daughter like Kasumi who washes her father's back!" Soun said, tears running down his cheeks.

"You want to be a girl, Ranma? It's traditional for the daughter to-"

"Forget it, Old Man! When'd you wash _my_ back!?" (And the _Male Flower of Weakness_ twisted its unopened blossom towards him.)

"Shampoo miss clean back. In village, there always kohai who wash back of senpai," she sighed.

The group was getting unwanted attention for blocking not only the exit but the traffic of potential customers to the concession stands that had opened during the trade fair. (Luckily for everybody, there weren't enough dangerous and cursed plants to extend past the field of the arena.)

They were saved from security guards by Ranma's stomach. And when it growled, others followed.

And so, again, Kuno offered to treat Ranma's date group.

[][][]

They were all seated in the food court, each with a fried food, takoyaki, octopus balls, being a favorite.

"But, excuse my lack of manners. Let me introduce myself to those of you who have not put my name and face to my well-reputed exploits. _I_ am none other than Tatewaki Kuno, samurai kendo-master at the remarkable age of seventeen! Nay, well-before this present age! And samurai I am, in truth, for I am the Lord of Nerima and heir to the vast financial empire of _9 Abilities, Ltd_."

He did not bow. But he showed his magnanimity by not requiring the others to bow before him.

"And, pray tell, who may I be addressing. Ranma, the Star of the Rising Sun, I, of course, know. (Though I would feign to know better). And _this_ Exotic Orchid of the East of us, I have met, though not formally by name. May I ask if, besides Ranma, you found the hair cleaner you sought?"

"Shampoo no look for hair cleaner, stupid, long-winded stickboy. Shampoo is name of Shampoo!" (And the _Male Flower of Weakness_ in front of her turned its unopened blossom towards her.)

"A remarkable product to need no further identification other than the generic name of the product itself."

"If I may, Master," Sasuke said, leaping into view. "The name of this girl, or so she has told me, _is_ Shampoo."

"Shampoo of Joketsuzoku, and tribe of great warrior womens!"

"I really should write that down," the short ninja said, searching his ninja suit. "Ah!" he said, bringing out a little notepad and pencil. "How do you spell Joketsuzoku?"

"Sasuke!"

"Yes, Master. This woman is the mother of Romeo Saotome."

"Romeo Saotome!" Kuno's hand instantly went to the hilt of his wooden sword. (And the _Male Flower of Weakness_ opened its blossom towards him!)

Nodoka wished she still had her real sword.

"Leave my mother alone!" the redhead said, getting between the two to protect her. (And the _Male Flower of Weakness_ aimed itself towards her!)

"I intend no injury or malice towards the woman! It is to her _Son_ , Romeo, I have a score of vengeance to settle!"

"Excuse me, Miss Ranma. But…," and Sasuke consulted his notepad, "according to my sources, Mrs. Saotome (previous married name also _Saotome_ ) is the mother of only _Romeo_ Saotome, your step-brother (father unknown). _You_ are the daughter of one Genma Saotome by another mother from a previous marriage."

"I _am?_ Oh, yes. I guess that _is_ the story about me and Romeo." Things were getting too complicated.

"You mean she is your "mother" in the social, not the biological, sense, correct?" the ninja asked.

Ranma saw her mother felt uncomfortable about being challenged to lie. She came to her rescue, "That's right. She didn't give birth to this body. That woman was Chinese." Okay, that was assuming the girl who drowned at Jusenkyo actually _was_ Chinese.

"Ranma, My Shining Venus, is Chinese?" Kuno asked.

"Chinese, but no Chinese Chinese, no Han! Many _different type of people_ live in big-big country of China!

"Body of Ranma belong member of Tocharian people who come to land of China 4,000 year past! Shampoo know many too, too tragic story about them!"

"I am at a loss. Tell me, My Purple-locked Rakugoka, is Ranma's ancestry Chinese or not?"

"Most people of China have black hair. And, is true, Shampoo no have black hair. Have hair of Guizi! Is why tribe of Shampoo move away from most people of China! Many have different hair! Make black-hair people of past too, too _queasy!_ "

"Ranma, then, is a Guizi, too!" Kuno smiled, thinking he understood, at last.

"Tocharian! Some of tribe of Shampoo have red hair. More have green hair." And she lifted the pigtail. " _This_ hair too, too red, must be Tocharian."

"But _I_ have red hair," Nodoka said, placing her hand on it.

"Must have Tocharian ancestor. But hair of this body too, too red, _must_ be pure Tocharian. And have blues eyes, too!"

"I see," Sasuke said, scratching his chin with his pencil. "I believe I heard about the Tocharian… They were Europeans who came to East Asia some 4,000 years ago. Or, rather, they were closely related to the Europeans with red hair, like the Basque and Irish, far on the other side of Eurasia."

He started writing. "So, the biological mother of Ranma Saotome is of Asian European descent."

He, then, said, "I know Mr. Tendo. Am I to assume that you are Genma Saotome, the man who married this woman of nearly European genetics?"

"That's it!" Genma rose with a roar! "I will not let this _Farce_ continue!" He reached down to pick his female son by her blouse front.

This brought him too close to the open _Male Flower of Weakness_ \- It released its pollen!

Genma sucked most of it in as he drew in air to yell Ranma's name!

He coughed! And dropped back down onto the chair.

"Pop!?" Ranma cried. , "Genma! My husband!" , "Genma! My friend!"

"Stupid man!" Shampoo said. "No get strong near _Flower of Weakness_." But, then, she had been to Yakusai, the village famous for trading in herbal medicine and poisons.

Genma put his hand to his chest and caught his breath.

Opening his eyes, he saw the flower. "Oh, how lovely!" And picked up the pot to hold. "May I keep this, Dear Nodoka?"

"It _does_ make a man weak?!" Nodoka gasped in horror. "I never _intended_ to use it on my husband, honest! I _just_ meant to threaten him so he would come to bed with me!"

"You want me to go to bed with you?" There was a pained look on his face. But he bowed his head, and said, "If that is what you wish, Dearest."

"Is antidote on little tag?" Shampoo suggested.

Ranma grabbed the pot away from her pop.

And he said to her, "You could have _asked_ ," and looked on the edge of tears.

"... It only says you hafta cut off the leaves and put the flower on a person's head. It don't say nothin' about no other attack!"

"Then large, stupid man no stay this way." And Shampoo took the pot and gave it back to the large, stupid man. "But maybe if man keep being stupid, flower keep man weak! Maybe always!"

Genma hugged the pot to him. "Thank you," he teared.

"Aw, geez! Much as Pop deserves this, I can't see him like this. Mom, you got enough money to buy a-"

"The _Male Flower of Love!_ This will change my life! You just wait until you see the change in me, Grandmother! The Daimonji School of _Martial Arts Tea Ceremony_ is going _manly!_ Macho! Machismo!"

And the group watched a young man in a martial arts dogi stride by with a flower in his head.

"Never mind, Mom."

[][][]

The sun was just setting this spring day as they all finally left the arena.

Kuno had Sasuke, and, so, he left to take his bath.

And the Saotome group decided it was time to return to the Tendo house.

Soun cried for his old friend, and Genma cried because his old friend was crying.

"Now, I don't know if I _want_ to go to bed with my husband."

" _Mom!_ I _really_ don't wanna hear things like that about you and pop!"

Shampoo giggled. "Make little man strong and, maybe, rest of large man be strong, too."

"Oh, dear! Do you think so, Shampoo?" Nodoka studied her weak husband, wrestling with her own desires. "I shall not have a better opportunity to get my husband to at least _be_ there for his conjugal duty."

Then, she put her hand to mouth and giggled herself. "I just had a thought! And it _would_ be the perfect way to celebrate the re- _union_ of a wife with her husband after ten years apart.

"Mr. Tendo, you know Nerima. Do you where there's a good love motel?"

Both Soun and Genma wailed rivers of tears. But for opposite reasons.

[][][]

And, so, it was just Ranma, Shampoo and Soun. And the pink _Female Flower of Love_.

"So, I am the one left with chaperone duty, am I?" Then he said, more to himself, "Appropriate, considering how long _I_ have abstained."

He remembered that the heir to the schools was there. He put on a happy face. "Yes, and it's done me a world of good, Son! It has concentrated my _ki_ energies to phenomenal proportions! I dare say, I shall be able to perform amazing martial arts feats!"

"Is all man of Japan stupid? Shampoo can read battle aura potential."

"She's right, Mr. Tendo," Ranma said, "Yours has more potential power than non-combat martial artists, but you've let it grow rusty."

" _What Did You Say!?_ " demanded Mr. Tendo's monstrous-sized head. His battle aura had taken on the perfect cast of a classic demon, with frowning, flashing eyes, flaring nostrils, and long, snaking tongue out of a wickedly grinning mouth!

Worse, it carried the _feel_ of a demon!

Even Shampoo was startled and intimidated! She almost dropped her flower.

The giant head shrank back and _Mr._ Tendo took on his usual form. "Consider that a warning from your chaperone."

[][][]

"Shampoo no can _do_. But loud girl say Shampoo can talk. Shampoo talk about Joketsuzoku, Village of Woman Heroes. Ranma there, see only women warriors!"

"Geez! Don'tyou got no men?"

"Have mans! Mans live in Danketsuzoku! Only hero man good enough for hero woman! Must defeat woman in combat with woman!"

"You sayin' _both_ the girls _and_ the guys train to be fighters?"

"Who does the housework?" Soun asked.

Shampoo gave him a harsh glare. "Shampoo learn Demon Head Technique and make tear man cry!

"Okay. Now I understand more about how your tribe works," Ranma said. "The "amazon" part is only half of the tribe."

"Is true. Boy live in boy village. Girl live in girl village. Know only same sex until marriage."

"I assume there is a neutral ground where the two sexes meet to perform their duties as a married couple," Soun said.

"Is true. Tribe has love motel."

[][][]

Though Ranma was still clueless about where Shampoo's "talk" was headed, Soun thought _he_ knew.

"Oh, look! The light is on in Dr. Tofu's clinic, I see," Mr. Tendo said. "Perhaps we should go in and pay our respects. After all, Shampoo, you do plan on being in Nerima for a while, do you not? Everybody in Nerima should know the good doctor."

"Is time for bed soon," Shampoo said.

"Ranma!" Greeted the doctor, coming out onto the small entrance patio. "I thought I had felt a disturbance."

"A disturbance?" Soun asked. "But we haven't caused any disturbance. Even our trip to today's exhibition in the arena was relatively without incident."

"I'm talking about the disturbance of auras, of course. Every aura interacts with other auras. The greater the interaction, the more the disturbance is passed along to other auras in a chain reaction."

"All know that!" Shampoo frowned.

"Uh, not everybody can read or even believe in aura in this country," Soun informed her.

"Then country stupid!"

"As I was saying, I felt a disturbance and thought it might be from you. And now that I see you, I _know_ it is from you. Will you come into my clinic?"

"Shampoo come with Ranma, too!"

" _I_ would like to accompany the boy and his date, myself," Soun said.

"Date?" the doctor's glasses slipped down his nose. He then pushed them back up his nose. "I don't think that would be good for my patient. This should be between Ranma and his doctor. At least, for now."

"Then, we will leave you here in Tofu's capable hands. Come, Shampoo."

Shampoo wouldn't let the man drag her away.

She frowned at the healer.

Then frowned at the redhead.

Then she frowned at both of the men. "Shampoo read aura, too. This is about blood-time of Ranma."

"What!?" cried Soun in manly horror. ; "What?" Ranma said, still not getting it.

Dr. Tofu gave up. "Yes, Shampoo, it is. I would have preferred Ranma had heard the news from me.

Ranma, come inside and I can give you some feminine hygiene products and advice on coping with this period of your life."

[][][]

"Shampoo, do you really have to be here with us?" Dr. Tofu asked.

"Shampoo know all about curse of womans. Now Ranma soon know about curse of womans body."

"Let her stay, Doc. I got a feelin' I'm gonna need all the help I can get from women. I ain't gonna get it from men. Mr. Tendo got outta here as fast as he could when you started talkin' about the details."

"Is true! Time of blood! Time of birth! And all other Time of Being Woman is Time for Womans Being Together! Mans no understand. Mans no want understand."

"But, for Ranma, there also has to be a time for being with a man who _does_ understand. ...Well, as far as my personal professional training and experience allows."

"Shampoo see. Ranma real man. Real man need Time for Mans. Shampoo leave but wait."

But before she did, she left the _Female Flower of Love_.

[][][]

"Shampoo comes from a village near Jusenkyo," Ranma explained. "I think of everybody I know, she may understand my curse the best.

"Except, you, Doc."

"I see. That's why you are dating her."

"I'm dating her 'cuz she'll go back tryin' to _kill_ me if I don't! Enough about her. What about me?!

"We're s'pose to have a guy-talk?" The redhead said, "Look, I haven't had many chances to stay a guy. I haven't had much chance to deal with my girl memories as a guy. And, to tell you the truth, I know if I _don't_ change, I won't have to deal with them! I been sorta hidin' from them."

"I understand, Ranma. I have been doing research. It suggests that female brains _are_ better at dealing with certain issues because, throughout the millennia, they have _had to_. Those that could hleft more children than those who couldn't. That's _not_ to say it makes them any less stressful and a threat to their mental health. It just means that they are more likely to overcome those than a male brain is. Again, each person is their own variable, with some succeeding better than others of the same sex. There are still children from those women who _couldn't_ really deal with the issues.

"Take homosexual acts. If a person is heterosexual, women, with exceptions, are more likely to cope with the experience than men, again, with exceptions. Not that that is justification for somebody forcing the act upon somebody!"

" ' sounds like a lot of _ifs, ands, or buts_ , to me. What has this got to do with…."

"Your period. It doesn't. But…" he glanced out the door Shampoo had left. "I think it is something you should know."

And he took off his glasses and wiped them. "Akane will _not_ be able to deal with the issue.

"I will not judge, but Akane will." He put the glasses back on and looked directly at Ranma. "Remember, performing homosexual acts with a woman does not make you a homosexual. And, neither does it affirm your male heterosexuality."

"Okay? Do you want to tell me more plainly what you're talking about?"

"No. It is up to you to discover yourself _for_ yourself, and where your boundaries are. Feel free to come to me for counseling.

"Now, about your menstruation, or period. I have some hot water here. I think you should be able to change back and forth even during your heaviest flows." And he poured from the electric teakettle.

Ranma's green blouse filled out to look more like a shirt and his black pants became looser.

He covered his face at the memory of what his mom had thought of the living room full of women's apparel, and, worse, what she thought of his _unmanly_ underwear! Man, it _was_ more difficult for a guy to deal with girl things! At least for him. Man! He _should_ get away for a long time and be where he could stay a guy - just see if he _could_ deal with girl memories!

"I do not like telling you this, Ranma, but I advise you remain a woman as long and often as you can. You need to let the blood flow out. There will be a build up and, then, a flood, if you remain a man for too long before you become woman, again."

"Geez! Man! How long before I can _stay_ a guy?!"

"Menstruation can last up to seven days but can be as few as two days. Since magic is involved, I cannot promise you will have a period like other women.

"I _do_ know something about Chinese medicine and magic, so if you have problems not described by the pamphlets I'm giving you, or that Kasumi…. Kasumi…. Kasumi…."

The brunet knew it was time to get out of there with the booklets.

[][][]

The young man came out of the examination room with a drawstring bag he was wearing as a backpack. Inside there were samples of feminine hygiene products and basic pairs of panties. In his hand were the pamphlets and booklets the Doc wanted him to read.

Shampoo was in the lobby of the clinic. Her first words to the _boy_ she had just met for the first time were, "Where _Flower of Love_?"

"Man! I left it in the Doc's office."

"Give Shampoo little books and get!"

Ranma did only because he didn't feel like arguing.

But before he could get it, Dr. Tofu came out with the potted plant. "Look! A flower for Kasumi! A _Malva amoritus!_ It is the perfect gift to give the perfect woman!"

"Yeah, Doc. Why don't _I_ deliver it?"

"Would you, Ranma? Just be sure not to smell it! And, most of all, don't put it in your hair! Those are only for women who don't mind being a woman!"

"Thanks, Doc! I won't." And the black-haired guy took the flower from him.

Shampoo then dragged him out the clinic door with a "Zàijiàn! Zàijiàn!"

[][][]

They were on their way back to the Tendos, now. "Where are the pamphlets?"

"Shampoo throw away. Womans know more about blood-time than stupid book man write! And Shampoo know more Chinese medicine and magic than Japanese doctor!"

"You were listening at the door!"

"Shampoo already say, sneak okay if no attack with goal of maim, kill!"

"Okay, Shampoo, tell me what I got I can expect. But, I'm tellin' you, I'm checkin' with Big Sister Kasumi!"

"Is called blood-time because that what happen! But Shampoo warrior! Blood no trouble for Shampoo! Ranma great warrior, too!" Then her voice softened, "Ranma and Shampoo face blood and battle together."

"Okay, blood! The Doc talked about that. But what's the battle?"

"Ranma! I can't believe I actually found you!" cried a boy in a travel pack running towards them.

"Ryoga! You're gettin' better at not stayin' loss, I see." (Meanwhile, Shampoo frowned at the interrupter)

"Yes! I guess I am. Hey, could I sleep with you again?" (Now, Shampoo glared!)

"Sure. Just don't become Burin-chan and let Akane cuddle you," the guy frowned at the other guy.

"Thanks! Look, I brought you Koshihikari rice from Nigata!" he said, holding up the package.

"You been to Nigata and back in just a few hours? That's clear on the other side of the island, over the mountains!"

"I told you, when I get lost, I get lost."

"Get lost!" Shampoo told him.

"I'm sorry! I didn't talk to you because I was just so excited about seeing Ranma!"

"Ryoga, this is Shampoo. She came from just outside Jusenkyo to kill me."

"We have something in common! I _went_ to Jusenkyo to kill Ranma."

"You stupid and get curse, too?"

"Hey! Ranma and his panda pop _also_ got cursed! And the only reason _I_ got cursed was because _they_ knocked me in!"

"Shampoo is from the girl half of a tribe of warriors, Ryoga. I mean _everybody_ in it's gotta be a warrior!"

"And Shampoo best girl warrior of age group! Beat fifteen boy warriors! No boy defeat Shampoo, yet!"

"What about girl warriors?"

Shampoo got a wicked smile. "Shampoo have many kohai. Even senpai, Shampoo make kohai!"

"Look, we're back at the Tendos."

The gates and the doors were as if Shampoo had never wrecked them. They all remembered she had, but none of them seemed to think it was worth commenting on. But magic had not destroyed them, so why were they now as good as old? Even Nabiki could not tell you about the Nerima Un-Wrecking Company. Only Kasumi could, but she wouldn't.

[][][]

"Ranma, Shampoo, and Ryoga, too! You've all arrived safely!" Kasumi greeted the guests.

"Hello, Kasumi-san."

"Hi, Big Sis. Here, Shampoo. Here's your flower."

"Nihhao! Ranma keep flower."

"No way! This flower's s'pose to make you _love_ bein' a girl! I _like_ bein' a girl sometimes, but I _don't_ want to _want_ to be a girl!"

"The, the flower does _that(!)?_ " Ryoga said, backing away from it.

Shampoo ignored him. "Ranma, is part of ancient Chinese medicine. When have blood and in middle of womens battle, smell."

"No, thanks! I been in plenty of battles, and I only use chemicals when I absolutely gotta. Here, Kasumi! It's a _Female Flower of Love_. Don't get the idea it's from me. Shampoo bought it at a show full of dangerous and cursed plants. I still have to keep Kodachi from usin' _her_ flowers."

"Oh, my, dangerous!?" Kasumi reluctantly accepted it. "Well, I shouldn't be in danger. I already _love_ being female."

"But they said "cursed", too," Ryoga said. "Whoever smells that may get a curse."

"Shut up, man!" Ranma growled, hurrying up to the guest room."

Shampoo followed. "Ranma no need flower, has curse now!"

"Oh, my! Has it been _that_ long since Ranma's been becoming a girl!" Kasumi said, following them.

The plant remained in her hands.

[][][]

Meanwhile, two others were out in the sand and cinder dust arena in front of the dojo. The only light was from the house and the gibbous moon.

"It's getting late, Akane," Nabiki said. "How long are you going to be out here breaking your cinderblocks? It's a school day tomorrow. Tuesday? You already missed today's classes."

"I'll do _make-ups!_ HaiYa!" the long-haired girl cried, smashing another! Around her were the remains of five blocks. _Remains_ , not halves.

Akane took one of the halves she had made of this one and positioned on top of two other halves. She intended to continue halving every block available until all she could do was turn them to dust!

"You _said_ you understood why Ranma had to date this Shampoo killer chick."

"I understand why, I don't have to _like it!_ "

Nabiki crossed her arms under her bust. "And what, exactly, is your problem with the date? That it's between Ranma and another girl? Or that it's between two _girls_?"

"Yes!"

"Here! Cool off," Nabiki held out a water bottle.

"I _want_ to be hot and sweaty!"

"Oo! Like you image _they_ are?"

"Knock it off, Nabiki!" And she knocked the bottle out of her sister's hand.

It's water splashed on somebody who had just left the house by the side door. "Bwee!"

"Burin-chan!" Akane cried. "I mean, Ryoga!" And she rushed to pick up the cute pig.

"You found us!" she smiled, cuddling it in her arms, pushing it against the canvas of her dogi. "I'm taking you inside so you can't wander off. I still have your leash."

"Akane, that _is_ really a boy, you know."

"Of course, I know, Nabiki! But I feel sorry for him. You should have heard the things he told us about last night. He's had a hard life. For three years, he's been basically homeless."

"So, you put him on a leash? Think about it. It would be outrageously kinky if he were human, on a leash and…," Nabiki tried to peek at a certain part of its anatomy, "only wearing a bandana."

"If it's alright for Ranma to be treated like a girl while he's a girl, it's alright for Ryoga to be treated like a pet while he's a pig."

End of discussion, as Akane opened the side door.

She stopped as the male Ranma passed her in a sour mood.

Then came Shampoo with a potted flower.

And, finally, Big sister Kasumi. "Ranma's going to do his bleeding in the bath room."

"Bleeding!?" But they had already passed her by. She and Burin-chan followed. "What's wrong?! Why is Ranma bleeding?!"

"Akane!" Nabiki told her clueless sister. "Ranma spent _weeks_ returning from the Cursed Springs!"

[][][]

Bang! Bang! Ranma knocked on the closed door of Mr. Tendo's room. "Aren't you comin' to for the show!?"

The was no reply. Just whimpers.

[][][]

Kasumi tried to shoo her sisters away. "We do not all have to come in. We have all seen menstrual blood."

"Kasumi's right, Akane," Nabiki said. "This is a job for a big sister."

"But I want to support Ranma! Ranma's my friend!"

"The most friendly thing you can do for the guy, now, is to let him have what privacy Big Sis and the battle maiden will give him.

"Tell you what, you show me yours, and I'll…. No. Even _I_ don't think that's funny."

"Bwee! Bwee!"

"Nabiki! Come back here with Burin-chan!"

[][][]

Ranma kicked off his pants.

"Ranma, could you please use cold water before you remove your, uh, 'boxers'," Kasumi asked, keeping her eyes down.

Ranma just dipped his head under the shower wand on the wall. But he was already pulling down his tap panties.

Just in time, his male sex was replaced by her female sex.

She didn't bother taking the shorts-like panties off, only taking them as far down as she could easily see in them over her boobs.

There was more than just blood on the silk.

And a small amount leaked from her sex.

"Is heavy light day," Shampoo said.

"I didn't need to come in here for this!" Ranma growled.

"But this is your first period. And we don't know, yet, what yours will be like," Kasumi said.

"And magic of curse can make blood-time different!" Shampoo said.

"But it isn't too heavy, yet," Kasumi said. "It just seems that way because you were a man and couldn't bleed like women. If you stay a man, when you do change into a woman, again, you will bleed more than a normal woman does even on her heavy days. Hot water _does_ increase period flow."

"Yeah, yeah! I hear you."

"Is happy time! Is good news for young woman who no want be mommy, yet!"

"Oh, yes. I am _so~o_ happy.

"Here, the Doc gave me things," she took the drawstring bag from off her back. "Tell me what to use, and how to use them, Kasumi."

"Stupid modern medicine. Where Shampoo come from, use rag, mesh bag with potpourri, and _this!_ " Shampoo said, thrusting the _Female Flower of Love_ at the redhead's nose.

Ranma put her hand to her nose, ready to pinch it closed. "Shampoo!"

"Is good Chinese medicine! When Shampoo buy, Shampoo think _another_ _Flower of Love!_ Now know is _medicine for womans!_ "

[][][]

"Here are the two futons from the guest room, Akane," Ryoga said.

The table of the common room was over her head. "Good, I've moved the two we keep in the living room for emergencies into here. Now, I'm putting this there."

"Why do we all have to sleep here?"

"Because I don't trust the Chinese sneak! We can _all_ keep an eye on her while we sleep!"

Then they could be heard coming down the hall.

"I still don't know what cramps have to do with the Women's Battle, Shampoo."

"Is like when warrior battle with one technique! Use too-too much, muscles cramp!" She still had that plant with her.

"I get fatigued when I use the same technique too often," Ryoga said.

"Stupid boy! Tired no true part of blood-time, cramps is!" Shampoo told him. To Ranma, she told, "And bloating! Bloating worse than cramps!"

"Yes, it can be. After hard exercise, I _have_ drunk too much and felt bloated, and had headaches and felt nauseous."

"This no about drinking, stupid boy! And bloating in womans worse than bloating in mens! Must be hero and warrior on!"

"Oh, wonderful," Ranma said.

"And, yet, it is _because_ women have less water in our bodies than men do, Ranma," Kasumi said, bringing a platter of nighttime snacks and pharmaceuticals. "Here are the salty or sweet things you'll feel like having, depending on your mood swing. Salt is important. I have also brought some ibuprofen sodium, and other medicines for headaches, nausea, diarrhea, and gas.

"You probably won't need them _this_ night, Ranma. But be sure to inform us if you have symptoms these won't help with. Promise, Little Sister?"

"Yeah, yeah."

"Promise, Little Brother?"

"Probably. I won't know until I become a guy again."

"Then I shall leave you people to have your slumber party. I have already left a pitcher of water. Ryoga, if you feel too uncomfortable being the only boy here, feel free to become Burin-chan."

"If you do, I can make sure you don't wander off in the middle of the night!"

"You mean like last night?" And Ryoga shuddered.

"Gimme a bandana! You're sleeping tied to _me_ tonight!" the redhead said!

"Shampoo sleep on other side of Ranma!"

" _I'm_ sleeping there! This is _my_ house!"

"I think I _will_ become the pig. I don't want to sleep with you being a girl. Or with _any_ girl! It, it...wouldn't be gentlemanly. Yeah, that's it!"

"Then Shampoo sleep on other side of Ranma!"

[][][]

The next battle had been against Shampoo sleeping in the nude like she wanted. Ranma had teamed up with Akane to win that battle. The pig merely ran outside to get a nosebleed before the amazon had gotten out of _any_ clothes.

[][][]

"Hello, Burin-chan. You made it back," the redhead, in her chemise top, and brief panties beneath loose tap panties, said from on top of her futon. "Akane thinks Shampoo can fit into one of Nabiki's loose pajamas."

"Bwee?"

"Yeah. Shampoo's not gonna like it. But I told her it's the only way she can sleep by me."

The redhead became lost in thought. She petted the little pig without even realizing she was.

And she smiled.

"Shampoo was right. And Kasumi made it right. Women need other women. A woman's problem brings them closer together. Women _are_ more friendly than guys. They gotta be."

She looked at the pink _Female Flower of Love_.

She stretched and brought it over before her. And stared at it.

Shampoo came back in one of Nabiki's pajama tops but Akane's bottoms. Bustier Nabiki was taller than Shampoo, but Akane was just a little shorter.

"Is stupid. Too, too much clothes, get all tangled inside! Shampoo wear just lingerie she wear today."

"No! You sleep in pj's or you don't sleep with us at all! Isn't that right, Ranma?

"Ranma? Are you listening?"

"Yeah, I'm listening. Tell me, Akane. Which of your sisters know the most about makeup?"

"Kasumi. Nabiki does the flashy kind, when she uses makeup."

"Then I'm gonna get Nabiki to put makeup on me!" Ranma said, picking up the flower pot.

[][][] [][][] [][][]

Does the cursed redhead have the body of the original girl who drowned 1,500-years ago? Or is she what Ranma would be if he were _born_ a girl, his sister? My answer is _both_. One of the X chromosomes Ranma carries is his own. But a girl's body needs _another_ X chromosome. And _this_ comes from the original girl. The redhead is a mixture of both, with Ranma's mother's redheaded traits strengthening _that_ side of the genetics.

The Tocharians were a real people. And they have left red-haired descendants in Asia. I remember seeing a documentary that showed what were claimed to be millennia-old Chinese paintings that showed, dressed and coiffed like a typical man of wealth of China, "an Irish hooligan".

"Guizi" (rhymes with _queasy_ ) is a Chinese insult for people who don't have black hair. It means "Ghost-child" (pale skin). In the alternative universe of _this_ story, they are a real type of peoples. And Shampoo's tribe is an offshoot of them. Being made to feel unwelcome, they isolated themselves from the rest of the world and formed themselves into the society of warriors _Ranma ½_ knows.

Throughout history, there have been many superstitions and fears about redheads and Guizi. Magic is a large part of them. Interestingly, for _Ranma_ fans, it has been shown scientifically that redheads are _more_ sensitive to heat and cold


	24. Chapter 26 The Female Flower of Love

An unusual disclaimer: Ranma ½ is a trademark of Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ Communications, and its characters have been borrowed without permission. And Son Turned Daughter was originally written way back in 2002 by the FanFiction author Tangent, and his characters Megumi, Yasushi and Ayane have, likewise, been borrowed without permission. Please see the first two chapters of this story under his pen name. This story is written for non-commercial purposes only.

[][][] [][][] [][][]

"Ranma use _Female Flower of Love_?" Shampoo smiled.

"You're not, are you?" Akane frowned.

"Maybe," the redhead said, looking at the flower in the pot she was holding. "Shampoo, you think this flower's like the one that made Pop weak? You said he wouldn't stay that way."

"Is true. Shampoo _know_ smell of flower only good little time. Must smell again. Know womans who wear in hair. Flower send root into head. Womans _always_ love being womans, then."

"The Doc said not to put in my hair," Ranma nodded. Her confidence wavered with, "Or smell it." She set the pot down before her on the futon, again.

"Ranma, you don't need that flower to get you through your period!" Akane told her. "Woman do it all the time!"

"This isn't about that!" Ranma frowned at the suggestion. "This is about messin' up Kodachi's plans for _her_ flowers. It's gotta involve me! You saw how she was when she saw me! She threatened me!"

"And Shampoo, too! Shampoo help!"

"This all started when you stopped her from robbing women's sexiness from them at the women's apparel shop! Other women are in danger, too! I'm helping, too, Ranma! I _am_ a martial artist!" Akane said. "This is my chance to _do_ something for what she did to me in first grade! Kodachi kissed me and _ruined_ my life!"

"Bwee! Bwee!" Burin-chan also volunteered.

"You sure, Akane? It means bein' girl-nice to Kuno, her brother."

"What!? Why do I, we, have to do that(!)?!"

"How else are we gonna get inside her house?"

"Break inside!" Shampoo had no problem with that. Both Ranma and Akane remembered how she had broken the fortress-like front gates and smashed the front door of the Tendo house.

"Then what? Maybe we can beat off an army of servants…." Ranma looked at Akane.

"I'm not sure. I've only seen that little ninja of his," Akane said. "They could be kuroko-servants like Asuka's." There was a name to add to her anger. It was because of _her_ Kodachi had kissed her!

"Then we could be handicapped. Only Shampoo would see them. Bein' from China, she hasn't seen Japanese shows with them in them, right?

"Or the Kuno servants might all be better ninjas than Sasuke and have the skills to keep from bein' seen and heard."

"Shampoo see Shampoo need learn more before break in Kuno house."

"Right. And we _will_ learn more if we're invited in!"

"By Kuno," Akane hated the idea. But she had no better one.

"More important, we can then work on gettin' Kuno to show us _where_ his sister might be keepin' the flowers!"

"Is true! Even if win against army of servant, Ranma and Shampoo no know where find flowers!"

" _Hey!_ Don't forget me! And _you_ met Kuno today! He can be a lot worse! Can _you_ be nice to him when he insists on fighting you and won't take _No_ for an answer(!)?!"

"She's right, Shampoo! Don't none of you come if you don't think you can keep from beatin' him up! After we take care of Kodachi's flowers, okay. But not _before!_ "

Ranma picked up the flowerpot, once more. Now that she had brought herself that much closer to being nice to the guy, she shuddered. "That's why I gotta use this flower. I don't think I _can_ be "nice" to no guy that way. It makes me wanna puke. Especially, if it's Kuno.

"I keep tellin' myself I gotta act all girly girl to him 'cuz he don't like that kinda girl. But I keep messin' up and actin' like me! I'm a tomboy to him and _that's_ what he likes."

"I'm not a tomboy!" Akane said defensively. "And what about _her!_ "

"What "tomboy"?" the amazon asked.

"Maybe we _all_ better take a smell of the flower."

Ranma set the flowerpot safely aside. "We better get our sleep."

But she couldn't. She laid on her back, thinking about the flower. She was playing with fire and she knew it. On the hopeful side, this could speed up her adjustment time. She would get a clear and definite idea of what she was like being a girl able to ignore what her guy conditioning, habits and memories wanted. She would _know_ what she was dealing with when she became her guy-self again.

On the l _ess_ than hopeful side, she might find she _liked_ being a girl better than being her guy-self. She could wind up trying to ignore her born-self _all the time!_

Then, again, it might not _be_ her choice. What if Shampoo was wrong?! What if the magic _kept_ her wanting to be a girl?! What if she became cured and never had to turn into the redhead? He would be cursed to _only_ want to be a girl. What if _that_ was the curse itself?! That's right! The Jusenkyo guide never did say how _long_ the curses lasted!

"I wish I knew if Pop was over _his_ flower makin' him weak," she said out loud. "Do you think he and Mom'll be back early tomorrow?"

"Ranma no know what father-mother do at love motel(!)?!" Shampoo said incredulously.

"A _love motel!?_ " Akane cried. Now there was a mental picture she didn't want! And she thought Ranma shouldn't have it, either! "Don't even _think_ about it!."

"Is true! Shampoo remember mother of Ranma say no have messy-together time for ten year. No return early!"

"Ranma, remember how your mom expects you to be manly! You _don't_ want her here when you've used that flower," Akane said.

 _That_ didn't help the redhead.

[][][]

Burin-chan, as Ryoga, had slept next to Akane yesterday night and Ranma the night before that. Of the two, he would have chosen Ranma, even as a redhead, over Akane. They both battled in their sleep, but Akane was much more aggressive.

But it was Shampoo who started the match off. The little, black pig as pretty sure she was asleep. Her eyes were closed and her mouth was open, softly snoring on her back.

Then she rolled onto her side. The side the Ranma was on. And her arm casually wrapped itself around the redhead. She snuggled closer and her mouth breathed near the pigtailed girl's neck and ear.

From the other side of Ranma, the sleeping Akane struck Shampoo's shoulder with enough force to roll her away from the redhead.

But Shampoo's hand held onto the redhead's pelvis and began rolling Ranma towards her.

Akane took Ranma's arm and did a jujitsu throw that sent the redhead over her and thudding onto the floor on the other side of her. Both seemed not to wake.

Shampoo rolled, again, and threw _Akane_ , Now the amazon was in the long-haired girl's futon next to the redhead still asleep on the floor.

Akane's leg kicked while, twisting her torso, her hand chopped!

With her back to the long-haired girl, amazon counter-kicked and blocked the blow!

She then brought her elbow to strike Akane.

Akane's arm snaked around to the inside of Shampoo's arm and used it to throw the the purple-haired girl. But in the awkward position she was in, she wasn't able to get her _over_ her body.

Then both of them wrestled, with Shampoo being more indiscriminate than Akane, but dojo daughter being more forceful! Akane never allowed the amazon to pin her, while Shampoo showed she could absorb blows even in her sleep.

Back and forth they rolled on the four futons laid out on the common room floor, first, one being nearer the pigtailed girl, then the other. They both would stop and lay on whatever futon each was on when they left their REM states. Only to begin all over again when at least one of them had another dream. They even woke up at the same time to go to the toilet. Neither moved from the futons until they came to a silent agreement. It didn't take long for them to reach a truce. But the battle began again when they again dreamed.

Burin-chan saw that each girl was so intent on the other girl they left the redhead to sleep 'peacefully' on the floor. The little pig decided that was the safest place to be.

[][][]

The black-haired boy sat up from the floor almost screaming!

He was glad when his nightmare faded from his memory. Something about a giant, _Demons' Own_ Flower with a wooden sword taking away his manhood! It had been very bloody.

Looking around he saw Ryoga, not the pig, sleeping on the floor next to him.

On the futons-side of him, he mainly saw Shampoo's head. She was underneath the common room table. It was _on top of_ her, with one of its legs still in Akane's hand. To him it was obvious that his long-haired friend had clobbered the amazon with it in the middle of the night. (Was she when she got the table back from the living room?) Yet, both were sleeping soundly.

Or they were until Shampoo's trained senses noticed he was awake. "Ranma!" she smiled her good-morning. And she rose up from beneath the table.

Ranma saw that Nabiki's pajama top was torn, and, for a brief moment, he saw one of her boobs.

"I said, No!" Akane screamed, waking up in time to slam the tabletop up against more than just that boob. Censored!

"Is because of Loud, rough girl Shampoo look this way! Shampoo say stupid sleep-clothes get in way!"

Akane looked around the table. "You broke the elastic of _my_ pj's!"

"Shampoo like sleep nude."

"Don't you get cold?" Nabiki said with a toothbrush in her mouth. "Your village _is_ up in the mountains, isn't it?"

"Shampoo know _Secret of Body Heat_ " she smiled at her.

Nabiki didn't smile back. "You owe me for my pajamas. 3,000 yen. And, no, I will not take it in "Body Heat" if that means what my dirty mind thinks it means."

"Here, Shampoo. I brought you a robe," Kasumi said, coming in with her own. Of all the Tendos, she was the one that had a bust closest in size to Ranma's and Shampoo's. But she was also the tallest of them all the girls in the house. Her pajamas would have been best for the amazon, but Big Sister wore nightgowns. And that was something Akane didn't want Ranma to see the big-busted bimbo in.

It had been all too much for Ryoga! He had fled and gotten lost.

[][][]

"Shampoo have flower!" And the amazon in the robe brought it over to Ranma. "Flower open soon with morning sun!"

"Man! It seemed a better idea when I was a girl."

"Then don't smell it!" Akane told her.

"Why don't _you_ smell it," Nabiki said to the warrior chick.

"Shampoo will!" And she started caressing and coaxing the closed flower. "Open, open, little flower. Let Shampoo smell…."

The others leaned a little closer as they watched. Then drew back as it did open,

All but one. And that was the one Shampoo pushed the flower towards!

"Hey!" Akane cried as the filaments of the flower reached out and grabbed her nose! A very familiar smell was puffed past the nostrils they held open. And _this time_ , she found it a pleasant perfume.

It wasn't until she smiled that the _Female Flower of Love_ let go. "A little pushy for a flower," Akane said, rubbing the stickum from her nose. "But beautiful." And she accepted it when Shampoo gave it to her.

"Akane?" Ranma asked, curious, and anxious for himself.

"Yes, Ranma? Oh, you're a guy, now." Suddenly, she realized, with a slight blush. "And I'm still in my sleepwear! I really should get dressed!" And she got up with the flowerpot and headed out the door.

They heard her get halfway down the hall before she said, "Why do I have to go to my room. I have perfectly good clothes in the living room! And more feminine ones, too!"

"Well, I never thought I'd see the day when Little Sis got good taste," Nabiki said, "Her own clothes are too young for a teenager."

"Am I gonna be like that if I smell the flower?" Ranma asked.

"If that how Ranma see being girl," Shampoo said. "Ranma be like own idea of what womans is."

"I'll become like what Pop's taught me what girls are like!" he said to his horror!

"Is no girl you like who like that?"

"Breakfast will be ready soon. You had all better hurry and dress," Kasumi said.

[][][]

"Okay, I'm as ready as I'm ever gonna be," Ranma said as if standing before a firing squad. "Splash me, Kasumi."

"Me? Alright, if that's what you want me to do, Ranma." And she took the glass and dribbled water over the boy's head.

"Thanks, Big Sis," the pigtailed girl said. "I'll be thinkin', I mean, thinking of you the whole time I love being a girl. I hope."

"I have the makeup case," Nabiki told her returning from her room. "Remember what you promised. This is on top of what you owe me for my taking pictures of you in that maid's outfit and my showing you my Distraction Technique _and_ for making me lose all that money by forcing a draw in the Furinkan High _Battle of the Sexes_!"

"Oh, my, I believe the pictures you took of Ranma as a maid _is_ the payment, Nabiki," Kasumi said. "And is it right for Ranma to pay for your gambling losses?" Kasumi said, caming to her other Little Sister's defense. "I don't know what this "Distraction Technique"."

"It was a trick!" the redhead said. "I thought I was payin' for something else!"

"I warned you, Saotome, didn't I? You gave your word of honor that I could take pictures of you no matter how embarrassing you found them."

Ranma bowed her head, acknowledging at least _that_ debt, too. The Something said she should.

But to Big Sis, she smiled, "Thank you, Kasumi. You showed me just what I needed to see from you."

"I know, Ranma," she smiled.

"Okay, get dressed, first!" said Nabiki.

[][][]

They found Akane still in the living room. The boxes and the things in there were thrown everywhere. "I can't find any!"

"See, Ranma?" Nabiki said. "Being a neat and tidy housewife is _not_ part of Akane's idea of being a woman."

Ranma groaned. "But it will be mine."

"Look!" The girl in the mostly yellow dress held up two shoes of two different colors. "This is the only kind of shoes they sent us! Platforms! They're clunky!"

"I like platforms." The little redhead saw the way Nabiki looked at her and said, "They make me taller!"

"Where flower?" Shampoo asked.

"Oh, it's in here, somewhere!" Akane went back to opening the last of the boxes. She just waved and said, "Maybe under that pile, over there."

After some digging, Shampoo found it. "Loud, rough girl bend flower! Ranma! Come smell before stem break!"

Ranma marshaled up her courage. And couldn't move. She knew all the good reasons she should. But she did not _feel_ the reasons were good.

Shampoo shoved the flower under her nose.

Again the thin, little 'arms' inside the flower grabbed a nose. Again, a quite feminine 'perfume' was released into her nose.

And Ranma felt feminine. Suddenly she noticed how many different colors there were in the world. But there seemed to be less detail. One color wanted to shade into another like those on a rainbow. "The flower's so beautiful! It's more than just pink, there's...well, I don't have the words for them."

[][][]

Ranma had on culottes that were a lighter green than the top. She also wore a yellow scarf and a gold brooch that Kasumi had loaned her. As far as shoes went, though, "Platforms are clunky."

"No dress for Shampoo! Shampoo wear own clothes."

The thorough and dedicated housewife that she was, Kasumi had already handwashed her guest's Chinese, silk pants, and top. She was an example. But not to her born-sisters.

"Now, for your makeup! Kasumi, you help Akane," Nabiki said. "Remember, this is for a Daytime "Date".

It took Kasumi's gentle skills for Akane to give up on applying the makeup herself.

"Ranma, sit still while I apply the primer. After that comes the foundation."

Shampoo looked at the number of things inside the large makeup case. She even saw the chart that showed the different the complexions of the woman with instructions on how to blend the different colors to achieve a match.

She _wasn't_ fascinated. "Too much. Too complicated. Shampoo have own _Secret of Beauty_!"

"I'm sure you have, amazon girl. Have you brought any of your ancient beauty products with you?" Nabiki said, more interested in the redhead's face.

"Shampoo have _Secret of Dark Magic_ for lipstick and perfume."

"So, the _Secret_ is to Pinch your cheeks, Pout your lips, Flare your nostrils and Keep your eyes wide?"

"No forget cross eyes little."

"What?" Ranma was startled.

"Oh, yeah! Reminds me of that alien cartoon chick, Lum," Nabiki said. "I'm sure it was to down-play how smart she really was, what with all those super-tech gizmos she had." She glanced up at Shampoo. "You _do_ remind me of her." And she turned back to her work. "Without the gizmos. And maybe without - Oh, a smudge."

"Shampoo have 3,000 year of Chinese techniques! Shampoo show _Secret of Beauty!_ "

The redhead put her hand on Nabiki's arm, stopping her from continuing. Ranma couldn't resist studying any technique.

Shampoo's battle aura lit up as it became more than potential. It became the empty vessel, ready to contain her _ki_. But that energy had to be shaped by her emotions. "Shampoo now _feel_ beautiful! Have confidence in how Beautiful Shampoo is! Shampoo compete with other girls! Shampoo win battle! No girl more beautiful than Shampoo!"

Ranma _felt_ it, too! Shampoo was radiating it past the boundary of her aura!

But the real secret was how the _ki_ energy was changing the lens of the aura people would see her through! All of her best features were highlighted, even given a shimmer and shine, while her lesser ones were more matted with less detail. What was most striking, though, were how her violet eyes sparkled! There was glitter in them!"

Ranma stood up, "I am going to learn that technique! It's better than makeup!"

"Don't wipe it off!" Nabiki ordered. "How long do you _think_ it's going to take you to learn how to do that?!"

"I'm Ranma…." she looked at Kasumi.

She sighed and sat down. Big Sis had no problem with makeup. Girls, lots and lots of girls, anyway, wore it all the time, so they must not have a problem with it. Probably _because_ it made them more feminine. It must be like was something you had to be a girl to understand. But did she understand? The flower was supposed to be giving her that understanding!

"Oh, well. I love being a girl, so I have to just love wearing what a girl wears!"

"Let Shampoo be the most beautiful!" Akane snorted. "Better her and Kuno, than us!"

"Akane, it's as I told you, Kuno prefers _tomboys_. That's why we have to be _all_ beautiful for him." Ranma said it, but she didn't think Akane would get it. For all her friend's good qualities, being able to face a reality she didn't want wasn't one of them. Well, at least while she loved being a womanly girl, she shouldn't be a tomboy.

[][][]

Shampoo had toned down her _Secret of Beauty_ Technique to save her food energy. They still hadn't had breakfast.

Ranma's own stomach growled. "How much longer, may I ask?"

"Not long," Nabiki said. "I would be putting on your lip liner and gloss, but it's just going to have to be touched up again after you've eaten. I'll do your eyes, now.

"Hmm. You have tattoos for eyelid shadow."

"Shampoo has tattoo there, too! Shampoo have pink, show belong tribe of warrior women! Blue tattoo for womans of tribe of Musk. No let no one think two different womans belong to other tribe!"

"Musk?" Ranma looked in the makeup mirror. "The girl this body originally belonged to was a Musk? I thought you said she was a Tocharian."

Nabiki took the mirror away and made her follow her silent directions as she applied the brow liner, eyeliner, and mascara.

"Maybe woman of Musk. Maybe no. One time eye tattoo more common. Tocharian even paint body of Tocharian blue.

"No, maybe no girl of Musk! Shampoo remember Musk use _Female Flower of Love_ and make hunted, captured beasts love being made womans by Jusenkyo spring. Tell Shampoo, Ranma ever feel like roaring, growling, barking, winneying?"

" "Winneying"? Only my name is _Wild Horse_ , Shampoo," the redhead smiled.

"Shampoo wait, see. See no sign, yet, girl Musk. Maybe another human fall in _Spring of Drowned Young Girl_ before Ranma."

" "Other human"?" Ranma couldn't shake her head because Nabiki wouldn't let her. "This is the wrong time for this, Shampoo. We need to think about stopping Kodachi from using her flowers. She may be wanting to do with them what the Musk did with them."

"Aiya! Musk enemy of tribe of warrior womans! Shampoo stop!"

"There! No thanks to your talking, I'm finished with your eyes, Ranma," Nabiki said. "You can eat. But _be_ careful not to smear or smudge it!"

"Alright, Nabiki." But Ranma wanted to do just that! It would take some time before she learned to tolerate it. She was pretty sure she could learn Shampoo's technique before she could learn that.

[][][]

"Oh, we're going to be late," the pigtailed girl fretted, clopping along on her platform shoes.

"That's good news," Akane said, in her own heels. "It means the others will be in class and, hopefully, will not see us like this. Honestly! We didn't even have time to do our hair properly!"

"Remember, have find flower of Kodachi before smell of broken flower go away!" Shampoo said.

"And when is _that_ going to be?!" Akane asked.

"In village, womans have smell three, four, five time in one day. All about how much womans love being woman _before_ smell flower!"

"Oh, great! It could be wearing off of me already," Ranma fretted again. "We had better hurry!"

"Hey!" Akane cried as she was picked up carried through the streets at top speed by the redhead.

"You know you're getting all sweaty! The makeup will be ruined!"

"Oh, you're right, Akane! Here, Shampoo, catch!"

"HEY!"

[][][]

Ranma caught up with Shampoo and Akane at the last corner before the street that led to the school gates. "Kuno's still there!" Akane told her.

"Alright, then, this is it. Remember, act like ladies. His sister acts like a lady. Except when she's being insane. Or maybe when she _is_ acting insane. Why do Japanese noblewomen have to do that annoying laugh?"

"Shampoo no know how lady act. Shampoo act like elder."

Shampoo walked the last block as if she had her sights on a male prey. Akane did an exaggerated wiggle of her hips. The redhead, with Kasumi as her role model, was the only one to come close to walking like a lady (or an elder). But she knew that was an act. There was an internal struggle between the woman her Old Man thought she was becoming and the cutie she was capable of being. Which one would win the contest? Modifying the sexist-cliches her pop had instilled in her could be made tolerable when modified by Bid Sister's example. But there was nothing of Kasumi in the minx.

"Ah, three Goddesses of the Morning Light come to greet me!" Kuno smiled. He brought up his bokken. "I would best the best - A date is well worth any challenge!"

"A date!? I'll give you…." Akane fought to restrain herself from giving the idiot her usual reply.

"Oh, yes, Kuno-san…-samma. We'll date with you," Ranma said.

"Shampoo, too!"

This was something Kuno hadn't expected. His wooden sword remained raised while he failed to comprehend what had just happened. "Should we not battle, first? That does seem the established course of events."

"Oh, no, Kuno-sama! You won when you went on my and Akane's double date! Since you were the only one who didn't have a date, it's only fair we give you your own date!" It was a Kasumi-type of answer with a Kuno logic.

"Shampoo no date man before. Japanese man show Chinese girl what date like?"

The sword was raised, again. It went over his shoulder as a proud gesture. "I, of course, knew I would be victorious in my endeavors to win the Goddess of the Hunt, Akane, and the Goddess of Ardor, Ranma, and, now, uh…."

"Chinese goddess Feng Popo," Shampoo laughed at her joke, knowing she was really Jiutian Xuannü, the goddess of war, sexuality, and longevity. The other one was a crone who rode a tiger on the wind. She would slip through his fingers like the wind or sic the tiger on him. Her choice.

"A divine addition to my pantheon, I am sure.

"Now! While we attend our classes, I shall have my manservant attend to the details for our date afterward."

"Oh, Kuno-sama, can't we have our date with you now? We really can't wait." Definitely true, the effects of the flower could wear off at any time!

"Yes, we want to get this over with as soon as possible," Akane said.

"Shampoo no go school. Shampoo be alone."

"A fair and exotic maiden such as yourself should never be lonely! Then, it shall be! Sasuke!"

"Yes, Master?" the short ninja said, appearing from where he had been hiding.

"Shampoo see blur."

"Oh, Shampoo! Sasuke is a wonderful ninja. Kuno should be grateful he has such a faithful one as him," Ranma said.

"I am touched!" Sasuke said with a tear in his voice. Then he became filled with resolve, "I shall see that your date is of the highest quality! Just tell me your wishes and I shall use _all_ my abilities to see that they are fulfilled!

"Though I do not believe we will be welcomed back to _la Belle France_ restaurant again. Master Kuno, may I tell you now what happened Sunday at the _Battle of Fine Dining_?"

"No. I still do not understand how you could indenture yourself to that man who names himself the Headmaster! No doubt it was under orders from my wayward-inducing sister."

"I _do_ serve more than one master," Sasuke said anxiously, looking at the others.

"Well, we commence! The limousine, chauffeur!"

"Oh, my! It is still impounded. There's a little matter of a fine to pay."

"Oh, Kuno-sama, we've already been on _that_ kind of a date. -And I _do_ thank you for all the money you spent. You've shown yourself to be more than generous."

"What she said," said Akane.

"We don't want to take any more of your money. We would like an informal date. You know, where we get to know the…" ugh! " _Man_."

"What she said."

"Stickman show inside of house?"

"A date in which we withdraw unto one of respective residences(!)? A date where we carry over the threshold the prospect of, mayhap, intimacy(!)?"

His smile became _more_ cocky. "After being treated to but _one_ afternoon and evening with Lord Kuno, My Ladies-in-Waiting intend to return the treat by sampling the delights of haremhood."

" "Harem-hood"? Is that even a word?" Ranma asked.

"It is the group form of "womanhood"."

"It is not!" Akane yelled.

Ranma's hand went over her mouth. "Don't let the _Flower of Love_ fade." And she whispered, "Do you want to show _I_ love being a woman more than you?"

[][][]

It was a long walk and along its entire length, the three girls had to be charming for Kuno. The longer this went on, the more Ranma knew that she would not have made it without the flower. Kuno kept proving how _unattractive_ he was as a boyfriend or husband.

"...despite the fact that Furinkan High School is a non-profit organization under the auspices of the Kuno-clan group of corporations, I, Tatewaki, receive top grades.

"But my greater pride at our alma mater is reserved for the numerous kendo trophies and championships I have captained!

"For I am the undefeated captain of our school's kendo club. The rising new star of the high school fencing world! The sound of my voice strikes fear into the hearts of my enemies! My peers call me...the Blue Thunder of Furinkan High!

Ranma half-expected there to be there to be a lightning bolt. Oh, look, there are electrical power lines overhead. Oh, no, she mustn't think like that. Kasumi wouldn't. Would she?

"Please, tell us more."

"Ranma crazy(!)?!" Shampoo whispered.

"It's better _he_ talk than _we_ having to talk to him.

"So, Kuno-sama. How did the Kunos become the Lords of Nerima?"

"Ah, yes! The Kuno lineage. Our roots are ancient and deep. My ancestor was first ennobled under Emperor Meiji Tenno!"

"You mean your family started out as _kuge(!)?!_ " Akane cried, incredulously. His family was middle-class bourgeois bureaucrats without any claim to nobility _before_ 1869? And, then, had a higher status than the samurai _themselves?_

"The Kunos _are_ samurai. An ancestor or two before the _Meiji Restoration_ left the path of the warrior and it was only through my direct ancestor Michi that we returned to the Way of the Warrior, _Budo!_ From the last heir of a dishonorably destitute samurai family, he bought the title and rights of the Kuno clan."

"Kuno wasn't the name of-" Akane was silence by, again, Ranma's hand over her mouth.

"Oh, do continue, Kuno-sama."

"And I shall. Michi greatest attainment was aiding those who wished to study abroad during that heroic time when Japan was transformed from a medieval, feudal state to become like the other great nations of the world, Westernized and…"

Meanwhile, Akane muttered on about how the Kunos only got to where they were by a history of red tape and bribery. She doubted even Nabiki could make herself legally samurai and get away with it.

[][][]

It had been a long, long walk. When they got to the place where they would normally head north for the Tendos, they went south-west. And, then, they had to walk twice as far. And all the while, Ranma was helping the egotistical, blowhard Kuno dig his own grave by flapping his lips.

They, at last, came to a more fortress-like wall than the Tendos', this one running the length of several blocks.

"Sasuke!"

"Yes, Master!" he answered, leaping on top of the wall. "I shall disable the defenses, at once!" And he disappeared behind the wall.

The Twang of bows and the Whizz of arrows could be heard!

And a Rip!

"And I had just mended my ninja-ga from letting Mistress Kodachi in, last night," they heard him sigh.

The next sound was the sound of large, gears that needed oiling that occurred just as the heavy gate began to open slowly.

"Welcome to _Chez Kuno!_ " its Lord and Master said, gesturing for the ladies to enter.

But the gate was still slowly opening. "...Or _Château Kuno_ , if you will. More than a castle or a mansion, but rather both."

"Oh, you mean _Shiro_ ," Ranma smiled, finding the Japanese word less pretentious.

"I wouldn't call it that," Sasuke said, now pushing against the gate in an effort to speed it up. " _Shiro_ can also mean "innocent or benign". The Kuno Maison is hardly that!"

"Doesn't also mean "blank"?" Akane said. "It sounds like a perfect word to go with "Kuno"."

"Ah, but "château" can also mean "chaste", which, as a true gentleman, I endeavor to be."

Seeing that the gate was open, now, he resumed his gesture to the ladies, "The word also means "chat". Shall we?"

[][][]

"Sasuke, is my sister, Kodachi, within our walls at the present?"

"I am sorry to say I do not know, Master. It _is_ a school day at St. Bacchus High. But she showed a more than usual interest in the plants she bought yesterday at the _Trade Show of Dangerous and Cursed Plants_."

" "Dangerous and Cursed _Plants!_ " Well, go, man, to the interior monitoring stations and ascertain her whereabouts!"

"But, Master, I haven't disabled all of the-"

"I said _Go!_ "

"Yes, Master!" And in a blur, he was gone.

"Kuno, we don't want Kodachi to have her "Dangerous and-" But Ranma was interrupted!

"No! Do not step on the white flagstones of the entrance path! They alert those inside of the presence of outsiders! Keep to the dark stones _only!_ "

"Shampoo see red stones, too."

"If you value your life, do not step on those, as well!"

"Shampoo no step on white, red stones. Shampoo learn fast!" It _was_ a good idea not to assault the stickboy's homeground.

"Around this way! That is a false entrance. If you avoid the trapdoor beneath the welcome mat, there is the prison cell that awaits behind the door, where you may trigger the release of poison gas."

Around a nearby corner, they came to a side of the house with no windows, or, it seemed, doors. "This is my own private entrance. Even my sister may not avail herself of it." And he thrust his bokken rapidly and repeatedly into a large, leafy bush.

The bush moved aside to reveal the door behind it.

"As you Ladies-in-Waiting have witnessed, it takes great skill with the sword to use _this_ portal," he said smugly, sliding the door open the door.

Out came a battering ram, knocking him yards back into a pond.

It wasn't a koi pond. "Piranha!" he cried, leaping back out, his clothes and himself chewed, and striking away with his chewed up wooden sword those fish who refused to stay in the water.

One refused to let go of his sword hand. Kuno frowned at it. "It _would_ be you, Tick-Tock." And he hit it with his sword hilt until it let go and fell back into the pond.

"Oh, my! You name them?" Ranma asked.

"My sister did. This is her favorite piranha. She named it after the crocodile in _Peter Pan_. Her favorite creatures are crocodiles. Fitting."

He reached into his kendo-gi and took from a secret pocket a length of bandage. He wrapped his hand. "Where is Sasuke, when I have need of him?

"But it is but a scratch. A Man Of Valor And Achievements On The Field Of Glory expects wounds. I shall be healed ere long."

[][][]

The three girls were alert for any other traps waiting to be triggered.

"This is my own private wing of this _maison_. I have, of course, others in the Kuno complex. Some of ancient construction, some of a more modern date. Each with their own separate courtyards. The variety is there to reflect my current mood and whim."

"Oh, I see. Does Kodachi have her own separate houses?" Ranma asked.

"Where would the economy be in that, My Goddess? We share the same domiciles, as any good siblings under the age of legal consent are obligated by morality and custom."

"Can you tell us where her greenhouse is?" Akane asked.

"Where Annoying girl keep flowers?!" Shampoo demanded.

"In due time, My Ladies-Soon-Not-to-Be-Waiting. In due time. First, Sasuke must send back his report to his general.

"In the meantime, let me make you more comfortable." And he stepped on a certain tatami mat.

And the others opened up beneath the girls!


	25. Chapter 27 Steampunk and Nietzsche

An unusual disclaimer: Ranma ½ is a trademark of Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ Communications, and its characters have been borrowed without permission. And Son Turned Daughter was originally written way back in 2002 by the FanFiction author Tangent, and his characters Megumi, Yasushi and Ayane have, likewise, been borrowed without permission. Please see the first two chapters of this story under his pen name. This story is written for non-commercial purposes only.

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St. Bacchus or St. Hebereke? Hebereke or Hebe-reke? Read the story and then the note at the bottom.

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Down they fell. And fell. Ranma trusted Shampoo to know how to land from the drop. The roof-leaper gathered Akane in her arms and prepared to redirect the force of _both_ their impacts.

At last, there came a light at the end of their chute. After two stories, they fell through the ceiling into the third. Their training proved awkward as they didn't land on any hard surface. They landed in a hillside of cushions. The hillside became an avalanche of cushions, tumbling them further into the room. No sooner would the martial artists gain some control over what their bodies were doing than they would be hit by cushions bouncing off the walls. They had to fight to stay on top of the cushions!

"Oh, my!" Ranma said, trying to still imitate Kasumi. Trying. This stress was driving the effects of the Female Flower of Love out of her system. Or so she thought.

" "Oh, _my"_ "? Is that _all_ you can say!?" Akane nearly screamed as she struggled to keep her head above the moving cushions while punching away any that were sent near her.

"This remind Shampoo of terrible Great Pillow Fight all little warrior girl must win before real training begin!" From the look on her face, it wasn't a good memory.

Looking for a way out, Ranma _had to_ notice the giant portrait on a wall. "Even without Kuno, we have Kuno."

Suddenly, the picture and frame was lowered like a drawbridge and down slid the fake genuine heir to the samurais, his wooden sword in his hands. "Now that you Ladies-in-Waiting are more comfortable, we can commence with the chat that I, Lord of the Chateau, promised."

Akane's answer was to punch two cushions at him.

His sword easily moved them left and right of him. "This is one of my training rooms," he bragged.

Suddenly, _more_ cushions came from the chute above his head. Automatically his sword went into action even as he commanded, "Not now, Sasuke! Not now!"

The sounds of huge cogwheels moving were followed by the room itself moving.

And the cushions became a landslide again!

"This _isn't_ water!" Akane cried. "I _shouldn't_ feel like I'm drowning!" Where before she had had trouble staying on top of the pile of cushions, she now was faced with them putting her beneath them! Nothing stayed solid beneath her that she could use to keep herself up. Only her powerful arms and legs kept her from being buried. But it was like she was digging a hole for herself! Sooner rather than later the well of cushions would collapse around her!

Ranma saw and battled, along with those tumbling, the barrage of cushions her long-haired friend was sending out. The redhead had just about reached her when she was hit by a wallop to the face.

A new emotion had been added its power to Akane's flailing, "My makeup! These rotten things ruined my makeup!"

Ranma's own makeup was left on the cushion that fell from her face.

But Ranma reached Akane. Holding her, she applied mid-air techniques to leap from one unstable cushion to the next she happened upon.

"Sasuke! You master orders you to stop the mechanism!" Kuno continued to command.

"The lever is stuck, Master Kuno!" came the reply. "I have said that you should have a maintenance staff to keep the defenses and offenses in good repair!"

"No excuses, man!"

"Yes, Master!"

Ranma saw that Shampoo was body-surfing a wave of cushions. It was a technique she herself had not yet acquired. - Which reminded her she _another_ technique she had wanted to try out.

"Shampoo!" she cried, tossing Akane over to her,

"Ranma!" Akane cried as if betrayed by a friend.

"Oh, Kuno-sweetie!" the redhead cried, bringing her battle aura up combat mode.

Now, how did that go, again? ...Pinch her cheeks, Pout her lips, Flare her nostrils and Keep her eyes wide? And, oh, don't forget to be a little cross-eyed.

But Ranma understood those as being the physical preparation for the heart of the technique: She had to _feel_ beautiful! Have confidence in how Beautiful she was! Beauty was a battle! And in _any_ battle, Ranma Saotome always won! This busty, curvaceous red-haired body was-

Buried under a cascade of cushions!

"Ranma!" Akane cried!

"Stupid Ranma!" Shampoo said, forcing the loud-girl to stay with her. "Ranma no beautiful like Shampoo!"

Kuno swung his bokken with all his speed and skill in his desperate attempt to save, "My Flame-haired Venus!"

"That's me!" the petite _Cutie_ giggled, emerging from cushions before him.

His sword was inches from that perfect face. But the sparkle in her big, blue eyes did not flicker. She grabbed the flat sides of the blurring blade between her hands and 'rode' it up to where she could sit on his shoulders, his head between her culotte-clothed thighs.

The feel of her unbeatable cuteness was enough to distract any man, but most especially Kuno.

He forgot about the cushions and was pummeled by them.

Ranma hadn't forgotten and wasn't pummeled, having leaped off of him.

Finally, the sounds of huge cogwheels moving stopped. The room no longer spun.

Physically. "My Sunrise!" Kuno cried, his face appearing out from cushions.

"My Sweetie!" she didn't cry. Now that the cushions were stilling, she lay belly down, shifting her weight with subtle martial-arts skill to stay on top of them. What _was_ noticeable was her little fist propping up her head as she smiled for him. She looked so adorable, and she knew it. "You were saying something about chatting?" She reached out and her fingertip touched his nose.

Getting a stupider look, his face sank beneath the cushions.

"Ranma! What do you think you're doing?!" Akane cried, wading towards her. She had to have the purple-haired amazon's help on pulling her up whenever she sank.

"I'm being cute! Don't I look it(!)?!"

"Too cute!" Akane frowned at the redhead who was a far cry from her _Romeo_ , or even _Juliet_.

"Ranma use _Secret of Beauty_ technique!" Shampoo said.

"Modified! I'm not beautiful! I'm cute! ' gotta go with what's available. That's _Anything Goes_!"

"Is true! Shampoo most beautiful!"

"Hey! What about me? -Eek!" Akane cried as Kuno suddenly rose from the cushions in front of her.

"You, Akane, My Diana of the Hunt, are the very definition of Vitality! You arouse my _ki_ to fill my battle aura in its entirety!"

But before his hands could reach her, he was felled by a cushion to the back of his head.

"Don't look at _her_ , look at me!" Ranma insisted. She _was_ investing a lot of emotional energy in this _Secret of Cuteness_ technique, after all! It was demanding more of her than the more pacifying _Flower of Love_. It demanded she _like_ being a girl, too, but in a more active way. With her mind on the two Kunos, first Tatewaki, then Kodachi, she hadn't realized yet that male barriers had been lowered. She was free to be her female self.

"I would look at both of my goddesses! Sasuke, the scrolls!"

"Yes, Master!"

Two giant canvases unrolled from the ceiling on the wall opposite Kuno's portrait. One had a cropped Akane high-kicking in her school dress, the skirt billowing, leaving most of her legs uncovered and promising a glimpse of her panties. The other, also cropped, had Ranma dropping in her school dress, the skirt billowing so far up it showed she _wasn't_ wearing panties! The only question it left was whether she was a natural redhead or not.

"Why Shampoo have wear panties when Ranma no wear panties?"

Her modesty violated, the red-faced Akane said, "That was taken while I was fighting. No wonder the Hentai Horde wants to fight - They get free peeks!"

The redhead didn't blush. She giggled. "Oh, Kuno-sweetie, I wear panties, now. Do you want to see them?"

She had captured his attention. But he said, "Yes, I would see the undergarment. Though only if the circumstances were correct for a gentleman and his gentlelady."

"Everything has to be "correct"? You want the proper mood to be set?" And from her lying position, she leaped and landed, kneeling, just out of his reach. "And what would that be?" she grinned.

"A chat, of course!" Kuno was suddenly sitting up on the cushions in proper high-class fashion.

Ranma _laughed_ , and put herself in the traditional Japanese, _female_ , sitting style. With her toes curled, her heels under her butt and her knees together, he was _less_ likely to see her panties.

"We four shall talk in a congenial manner that leads towards a lowering of class distinctions and inhibitions. We shall be swept from the social to the romantic stimulations to, I dare say, those beyond."

"What Stickboy say?" Shampoo asked.

"Kuno-sweetie doesn't want to see just _my_ panties," the redhead said.

"Shampoo follow lead of Ranma," the Chinese girl said, sitting where she could see her. She even imitated the very _Japanese_ posture.

"I'm not showing them to Kuno - or _any_ boy!" Technically, Akane hadn't even shown Ranma her panties when she was a boy. If she had, she had forgotten.

Ranma simply pointed to the canvass of her high-kicking in her dress. "Tell the truth, Kuno-sweetie. You have pictures taken where Akane's panties _can_ be seen, right?"

Akane's hands went automatically down to her lap as if her panties _were_ already exposed.

Kuno's eyes were still on the redhead. At her cute prompting, he confessed, "I have cameras positioned all about the school gate."

"That's why you always challenge me there!?" Akane screamed in outrage! Wanting to beat him up here like she did there, she moved towards him-

And began sinking in the cushions!

Both Ranma and Shampoo pulled her back up on top.

"Shampoo have new name for Loud Girl. Loud Girl now Dense Girl!"

"You do have an unusual center of mass, Akane. It _does_ help you deliver power to moves," her sensei said, helping her self-evaluation,

Back on the cushions, Akane refused to sit traditionally. She chose the more comfortable legs-to-the side-and-knees-together style. She did tug at the hem of her dress more than was necessary.

"Let's chat, then," Ranma said. "You have until I have to go to the toilet."

"Perhaps My Water-born Venus should find rest in the facility before we commence? The serenade of words is best done at the more leisurely rhythm and pace of amour."

"No "Wham-Bam-Thank-You-Ma'am"?" For once, Ranma appreciated the Kuno-family's need to talk. When Tatewaki wasn't attacking, the Something put her under greater pressure to pay back the debts of honor she owed him. How far _could_ he go with her before she was able to stop him was something she really didn't want to find out. It was better that he just talk. "Tell you what, I'll use my techniques to stay here and hear your words."

"Shampoo, too!"

Challenged to hold it in, Akane felt a need that wasn't there before. But she was stubborn! If _those_ two martial artists could do it, so could she! And may Kuno be the first to go! (If only it didn't keep her attention on her sex.)

"On the Social-level of conversation, the objective is to become acquainted with the biographies of one's partners in palaver. My own, the ancestry and accomplishments of their scion, Tatewaki Kuno, I have already regaled you with on our way to the Kuno Chateau.

"Therefore, it must by necessity, be your own turns to inform your host of your own lives. Akane Tendo's I'm well acquainted with. I would know more of Ranma Saotome's deeds and desires. But, as those of Shampoo is the least known, it is _her_ with which we must begin our rounds."

"Ding! Ding!" Ranma imitated the bell that stopped ring-sports rounds. "You talked about yourself and your ancestors, but you didn't talk about your _family_. What about your dad? And your _sister?!_ "

Tatewaki frowned at the names. "Our conversation for building better relationships should be about our _personal_ biographies, not those peripheral personalities."

"How Shampoo know how Shampoo treat father, sister of Stickboy, then?"

"She's right," Ranma told him. "Perhaps I've been wrong in how I've been treating your dad and _sister_. You have to tell me!"

"You have not treated my father wrong for you have not met him." He was still in denial that the Headmaster of the school the Kuno clan owned _was_ his father. "And how he is to be treated when you meet, I do not know, for I, myself, do not know how _I_ shall treat him. We parted on ambiguous terms."

" _This_ I'd like to hear," Ranma said, hoping to get a clue about Kaneto Kuno. " _Then_ your sister!"

Kuno 's face reflected the emotions of his memories as if they were still fresh. "My father was a strict and dedicated disciplinarian. His motto was, _What doesn't kill you makes you stronger_. Ah!..." he said, almost forcing a smile, "there were many times when I did feel I would be killed. But I _was_ made stronger. Indeed! I was made a man before my chronological years! Nay! I am more the man than others twice my age!" he said proudly.

"That being said, I reached a maturity where I had advanced beyond the wisdom the techniques of my paternal sensei could provide. The one that graduated me from his care was the one where, at age 14, I was once again stripped and exposed to the elements, hung from a tree like the ancient god Bacchus!"

("Bacchus!? I've heard that name before," Ranma said.)

"That was a training method I was quite well acquainted with. What made this the last time I would endure the session was that after my father had given me a buzz cut he intended to engrave a tattoo upon my cranium! My limbs tied, I fought with my head!" His voice rose as if he were reciting an episode from a heroic epic. "And when I regained consciousness, he was gone and vanquished! Three days later I was free of my bonds and discovered I had freed myself of him, as well, for he had fled before my righteous wrath!"

The story from the Truce Enforcement Club, now the Date Management Club, was that their members three years ago had managed to get the Headmaster's own school records and had blackmailed him into leaving. Ranma rather believed it was _they_ who had driven Kuno's father away. (And it was Ranma's _own_ action of sending the booze wagon the man was sitting on down a hill to crash that had driven him to back to Furinkan, his school records be damned!)

"Ever since that day, I have headed the Kuno clan, responsible for every aspect of our estate, literal and financial! And for which, I have proven myself quite capable. My training has, indeed, prepared me to embody the meaning of our name, the _9-Abilities!_ For that, I give thanks to my vacant father!" His voice then lost its bravado with, "And that is the only _thanks_ I will give him."

"Man, the Headmas- Your father sounds like a real creep," Ranma said.

"It is an opinion that I am not allowed to share. Whatever his actions towards me, is not a son obligated to love his own father? As legal heir to the Kuno fiefdom, I have legions that are obligated to be loyal to me, so, too, must I be loyal to him that sired me and given me my position in society." It could be seen, though, that his heart didn't really believe that.

"The Club said that, as bad as he is, he was _worse_ three years ago," Akane said. "I wonder why Kasumi never mentioned what he did to the school while _she_ went there. She had to have met him." That brought up the memory of what happened two days ago, during the Fine Dining Challenge. Her wu-wei sister had actually challenged the Headmaster - And won! She had seen how relieved the man was when Kasumi had left. Could her quiet, unassuming Big Sister have been the real reason Kuno's dad had left the school, the town, and the country?

No, course not! Akane told herself. That was just one of those wild thoughts that flit through your head.

"You said something about Bacchus? That's the name of your _sister's_ school, isn't it?" Ranma saw her opening and took it.

"Yes. It, like Furinkan, is a school owned by the Kuno clan. Though, for those unfamiliar with St. Bacchus, it is often called by the Japanese name of St. Hebereke. My sister, Kodachi, will, at times, play with the epithet and refer to herself as the _Curly-haired_ Hebe, the goddess of youth before she married Hercules."

" "Hercules"?" Even Ranma knew the name and some of the stories about him. Hearing that the Black Rose may be interested in having her own _Hercules_ gave impulse to the redhead without male barriers to want to remain a girl.

"My father named it St. Bacchus in honor of his patron saint, Nietzsche, the philosopher. Who, by the way, also became insane."

"OK," Ranma had no idea who this Nietzsche guy was or why the Headmaster hadn't just called it St. Nietzsche. "Saint" was just a title indicating revered respect among the Japanese, after all.

"And because of her adoration of our father, I fear my twisted sister, the Black Rose, is also on her way to insanity, as, she, too, has shown an interest in the teachings of Friedrich Nietzsche."

"Nietzsche was a sadist?" Akane asked.

"Not by their interpretation. They, like Bacchus, believe that people are made more aware and alive when confronted with chaos and destruction. If just to survive. And this can propel them to be greater humans. They think of themselves as the Yin which does not compete but complements and completes the Yang. Yin is the Female Principal, and Bacchus was a male god who preferred women and _liked_ pretending to be a woman."

That hit too close to home for Ranma. She knew it but didn't _feel_ it. She wasn't _pretending_. Right, then, she felt she _was_ more girl than guy. Her legs uncomfortable from the - correct! - way she was kneeling, the redhead leaned within his reaching range. (And Shampoo did the same. Akane didn't.) "How did the Black Rose become interested in flowers?"

"As I said, my sister entertains the notion that she is another Hebe-reke. The goddess of youth, Hebe, was the cupbearer of the gods, responsible for providing the _ambrosia_ and _nectar_ that kept them immortal. Her interest in flowers and herbs and chemicals from other sources stems from her hobby of finding another source to long-life other than the ones the Taoist alchemists prescribe. Hebe _is_ , after all, not an Eastern, but a Western goddess."

" "Taoist immortality"?" Ranma and Akane thought of the Awful Nasty Candy that won them the Fine Dining Challenge. They could believe Kodachi's "ambrosia" would be just as repugnant. Bacchus was the god of wine. The ancient gods would _have_ to be drunk to take _that_ kind of medicine.

"I would not be interested, if I were you, My Own Goddesses. Like Bacchus and the non-Olympian gods he is related to, the Black Rose believes to attain eternal life, one must first die before one can be resurrected. Even her paralysis powder was originally about preparing the victim by enforcing meditation as they lie catatonic in a living death. This I know, as I myself have been a test subject of her experiments."

Geez! Man! The Something was telling Ranma that she should honor her debt to him just out of all that he had endured at the hands of his own family. Who would have thought of all the Kunos, _he_ was the most sane and worthy of some empathy. She wanted to reach out to him and….

And: No! No good chat! She wasn't _that_ much of a girl! Or kind! (Right?) She and her friends were here to neutralize the Black Rose! She was a threat not just to them but to everybody! Her stealing women's sexiness was like her giving herself their youth! She had stopped her from doing that! She would stop her from using the flowers of love and weakness! "Why haven't you stopped your sister?!"

"For the same reason that I did not retard the actions of my own father before his extreme methods became too extreme. It is epistemic knowledge that a brother must love his sister in the non-incestuous definition of the word. As a noble and an exemplar to all, I, Tatewaki Kuno, must honor my familial duties and support my relations as much as I am capable of bearing."

"But _we're_ not family." Her stomach turning, she added, "Yet."

Kuno finally, fully realized just how close this elfin redhead was to him. The monologist had only one thing to say, "Sasuke!"

"Yes, Master!" the short ninja answered, appearing up from the cushions between them. ("Aa!" Akane cried, nearly toppling over and sinking into the cushions.)

"Report, man! Have you ascertained the location of my sister?"

"I can inform my you that Mistress Kodachi's laughter has not been detected in any of the usual places she can be found. I have not had the time to check the many other places within the estate."

"Where did she take those flowers she bought yesterday?" Ranma demanded.

"Tell her!" his master ordered.

"Pity the poor servant with more than one master! Mistress Kodachi isn't going to like me telling you they are Greenhouse Laboratory."

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Ranma and Shampoo could have gotten out of the room easier and faster if Kuno hadn't insisted on demonstrated his prowess with his sword. With the skill to move tens upon tens cushions without cutting any, he speedily piled them up to where they could reach the hidden door between the hanging scrolls. Well, this _was_ one of his practice routines; he should be good at this.

Meanwhile, Akane was telling the others, " _Hebereke_ simply means "drunk to the point of being untrustworthy and uncontrollable"."

"Bacchus _was_ the god of wine, and Hebe was a goddess who kept their cups full. These are the Kunos: They'll force their interpretation on things and have the bucks to get away with it." Ranma groaned as she realized the terrible, Kuno-like pun she had just made. The slang for American dollars, the international symbol of wealth, "bucks", bakk(u)su, was the nearly same with their unvoiced vowels as the Bacchus, Bakk(a)su. This similarity may have what originally brought the god to the wealthy Headmaster's notice.

"Ranma smart. Make good warrior leader," Shampoo said.

"Me smart(?)" That was the first time anybody said that about her. Ranma knew she was a great tactician, but, lately, she had been showing signs of being a strategist, too. Was the Curse actually turning her into a better martial artist, like Akane suggested? Maybe performing heroics _was_ what she needed to do.

"There!" Kuno announced. "Here is our stairway out of here!"

But, as Akane was climbing the hillside of cushions, she lost her balance and caused _another_ landslide, destroying their way out.

Ranma got her before she sank into the lake of cushions and lifted her up towards the hidden door with her leap. Kicking the panel, she forced it to slide open and, then, used a mid-air somersault to toss Akane in before clambering in using her hands.

Shampoo followed carrying Kuno.

Kuno did not seem to appreciate the assistance. He was green in her arms. And Ranma noticed. The Chinese Guizi girl was too beautiful for him. And here Ranma was, stuck with just being cute. She was jealous.

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Keeping Shampoo to the rear and away from Kuno, they all followed him. Or, rather, Sasuke with his flashlight.

The narrow hall led to ordinary-looking stairs. This made the more sane among them happy. This was Japan and earthquakes happened too often. Being underground when one happened was not a good idea. The Tendo house had an attic, but only a crawl space beneath.

But they only made it as high as the first basement. "This is level where every place within the chateau can be reached by secret passages. But let me lead so that I can disarm the boobytraps."

" _You_ , Master?" Sasuke said, nervously. Even being the most familiar with them, he was probably uncertain whether he remembered where each one was or how to disarm the different kinds.

It would have helped if they had updated the place and had installed motion detectors that turned on the lights as they went along. But the Kunos seemed intent on leaving as much of their chateau 'steampunk', that is, around the late 19th and the very early 20th centuries. That was the era when Japan first became fascinated with technology but was still developing the ability to be high tech. It was the Heroic Age of making the nation a world power.

"Ow!" Speaking of heroes, Sasuke's flashlight was dropped as he found a boobytrap. An iron bar in the shape of a karate hand had come down on his back, just missing his head. "That is going to leave yet another mark," he groaned, picking himself up. Only his ninja training kept him from having any broken vertebrae.

"Aw, man!" Ranma said, feeling some sympathy for the runt. "Hey! Why are we letting _him_ have all the action? This could be good training for us!" And she used her superior shortness to jump through the space between Kuno's shoulder and the ceiling.

"This is _dangerous_ , you know!" Akane warned, shoving Kuno aside to get after her impulsive friend.

"No forget Shampoo!" But she wasn't able to get past Kuno.

Kuno fled before her. And, when he came to Akane, he swept her up in his left arm as he wielded his sword to protect her! "Fear not, My Athletic Damsel, I am the host and shall protect you!"

"Let go of me!" Akane cried. She took hold of the iron bar and held on.

The wood it was set in was getting rotten, though, and the bar was torn loose.

"Wait up, My Flame-haired-" He never finished the sentence, as Akane swung herself and the bar around and hit him on his forehead! Down he went.

Akane barely managed to land on her feet.

"Aw, Akane, why'd you have to do that!?" Ranma asked in exasperation. "No beating him up until _after_ we take care of those flowers, remember!? How are we to know where they are without…." He eyes fell on Sasuke. She smiled coquetrily. " _You'll_ help us, won't you, Sasuke?"

"It is my duty to stay with my master," he said resolutely.

"But your master wants you to help us, his guests right?" She moved closer to him.

"Look out!" he cried.

Where, before, she had unknowingly stepped over a tripwire, now she unknowingly tripped the wire. Ranma's trained senses warned her and her reflexes, twisting and turning her, saved her when the sharp throwing stars were released from the strings that had held them. Physically the worst she received were a few nicks. Her clothes, though, received tears and cuts. Since her boobs were out further than the rest of her, her bust was torn the worst. Her cleavage was exposed and the tear on her left side left only a strip of cloth covering that nipple.

Sasuke did not get nosebleeds. But he could blush. "Maybe I _could_ show our female guests the way."

Good old, Women's Tactical Advantage, Ranma smirked. (While Akane frowned.) "Okay! But you've got to let us lead," she said, covering the worst tear with her hand while pretending to be modest. "You can be our _rear_ guard?"

"Your rear!?" he said, still blushing.

"Shampoo have turn! Ranma almost become amazon!"

"And what has boobytraps have to do with becoming part of your tribe, Shampoo?"

"Shampoo never call tribe Amazon. That name from outside! But tribe know what _Amazon_ mean. _Amazon_ mean No Boobie. Shampoo want Ranma keep boobie." And she touched the barely covered one.

Ranma flinched, backing away!

That gave Shampoo the room to squeeze by (while brushing her body unnecessarily against the redhead's body). And she took the ninja's flashlight while his mind was still on her 'attack' of Ranma.

Giggling, the Joketsuzoku girl skipped ahead.

But her trained senses were alive for danger. From what she could make out from the long-winded, blowhard Stickboy speaking in a language not her own, she could relate to this Nietzsche. Chaos and destruction were invigorating! Treating everything as a battle keep her excited to stay and _be_ alive!

She _still_ had a one-stone - 14 pounds/6.35 kg - stone land on her head. She was so hardheaded, _it_ was the one to crack. It still hurt! "Aiyii, chi, chi, chi!"

"Sasuke! Where _are_ you, man! You _know_ how I feel about being in the darkness!"

"I'm coming, Master!" he said, after finding the spare flashlight he carried. It wasn't until after he reached him that the battery died.

"I guess it's my turn, next," Akane said, forcing herself forward.

Ranma took her by a shoulder as she passed her.

Akane glared at her!

But Ranma merely said, "Good luck, Akane."

Akane smiled at the confidence her sensei and friend was showing her. "Thanks, Ranma!"

Akane stopped and looked at the stone that stood on the floor beside Shampoo. If the Chinese girl didn't move, she would have to jump over it. That was something she did not want to do. It would make her feel silly.

Instead, she gave it a mighty blow and broke it entirely in half. It was Shampoo that had to move: Away from the shrapnel! Satisfied, Akane picked up the smallest half and carried it with her down the narrow hall. "I can use this as a shield - _Or_ throw it ahead of me!" And she did.

It went all of one yard/one meter. No traps had been found.

She picked it up, and threw a similar distance. Again, no trap.

"This too too slow! How long before Dense Girl get too too tired of game?" Shampoo asked.

"A long time!" Akane stubbornly said, picking the stone up again.

But she walked the next couple of yards/meters.

The floor broke beneath her! And she and the stone fell into a well with a splash!

"Akane!" Ranma cried, getting around Shampoo.

Steam rose from the lit floor below!

"I can't swim!" Akane cried, flailing about, barely able to keep her mouth above the hot water.

"Aw, man!" And the redhead jumped in!

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The black-haired boy was nearly drowned himself as Akane desperately clung to him in all the wrong ways! The pull from water mains that the well fed did make things any easier.

But, at last, Ranma got her to the edge of the well. Shampoo was now there to help both of them up onto the catwalk.

Rising up on either side of the elevated, railed-in bridge were giant boilers of a distinctly vintage type. The Kuno chateau _was_ steampunk, fed by its own geothermal well. And there were probably more scattered about the estate. The site had been well-chosen.

But Ranma wasn't thinking about that. "Aw, man!" he said, looking down at the wet and ripped clothes plastered against his very fit and _male_ body. "No more cute bod!" Even as he said it, he realized it sounded odd.

"Shampoo agree. No more cute body." But it was a very _handsome_ body. Her male children would be fortunate to have a body like his. And her _female_ children would be blessed to have a body like the redhead's! Now, if only the _male_ Ranma would defeat her, she would have _two_ sexes to love!

*Cough!*, *Cough!* (Struggling to inhale) "Hey!" Akane managed to say.

"Akane! Would you like some mouth-to-mouth respiration?!"

"No!" *Cough!*, *Cough!* she told him, using her hand to hide what _her_ wet clothes revealed.

It was so hot in this basement. Their clothes were soon dry. But it was so humid, sweat was taking the place of the simple wetness.

They looked for a way out.

[][][]

"Why'd they leave that well _uncapped!?_ " Akane was still upset about almost drowning. "It makes as much sense as having a swimming pool underneath an ice skating rink!?"

"What?" Where'd _that_ come from? "You'd rather fall on hard metal?" Ranma said.

"Was boobytrap! Trap catch booby!" Shampoo giggled. Then she looked at the redhead. "But no catch boobie of Ranma."

"I don't have to think about boobs, right now," he frowned. He was still speaking Female Japanese. His eyes wanted to look at those of the two born-girls. Instead, he looked away.

"Stairs!" he rushed to the metal steps off the catwalk.

From behind them, they heard Kuno cry, "Geronimo!" and Sasuke cry, "For my master!" Two splashes followed.

[][][]

"I thought we were supposed to let Kuno lead us to those flowers?!" Akane said.

"Until I find some cold water, Kuno is _not_ going to be happy to see me! As a guy, I'm Romeo to him, remember? Who knows _what_ he'd think when he wonders where the redhead went! Let's see what we can do without him, okay?"

Not stopping on the first basement, they opened the stairway door onto the ground floor. On the other side was one of the bookcases of a library.

Akane noticed that another one was empty except for the photo albums on one shelf. "Ranma?"

"What?" he asked, closing the bookcase-door.

"No. Look! The name on that bookshelf is _Ranma_."

"What!?" Interrupted, he didn't find the way to _keep_ the secret door closed.

"I think Kuno's collecting photos of you."

"But I've only been in town for six days! And I don't think Nabiki has taken enough to fill a shelf." As he was walking towards the albums, he said, "Akane."

"What?"

"There are _three_ bookcases with your name on them."

Akane growled and stormed over to the nearest one. She stopped when she saw there were was a pile of albums on a reading table that hadn't found a place in the crowded bookcases.

"No! I _don't_ want to see the kind of pictures of me he has!"

Ranma looked to the closed bookcase door. "We'd better get out of here, fast! He _has_ to be coming!"

"Ranma!" Shampoo said.

"What now!? Don't tell me he has something worse than those picture albums?"

"On wall! Is map!"

And the framed map was of the Kuno estate!

[][][]

As the male Ranma had the longer arms, he was the one who carried the large, framed map. They found a door to the outside, but their problems weren't over. "The map tells us how to find the greenhouse, but it doesn't tell us what dangers are on the way."

"Ranma, Shampoo jump from building top to building top!" Shampoo said.

"I can't _do_ that!" Akane said in her frustration.

"Then Dense Girl stay here. No can learn jump technique!"

"I'm afraid Shampoo may be right, Akane. Your center of mass may be right for some things, but not rooftop leaping." He saw how upset this made his friend. "We'll train to give you control of it. It's the secret of mid-air maneuvering."

"Thanks, Ranma," she tried to smile. Wanting to make her sensei proud of her, she now said, "Go ahead! I'll stay here. I should be safe in this garden."

"Thank you, Akane." He moved to leave. He saw the pond and thought about changing back into a girl.

But he didn't. Instead, he turned around and pulled Akane to him. And kissed her.

He left the girl stunned.

[][][]

Akane screamed and barely got away from the crocodile that lunged at her from the pond.

"Oh, ho, ho, Ho, ho! I see you've met Mr. Green Turtle!" Kodachi was in her green leotard. Twirling her gymnastics ribbon, she said, "I think you two should get to know one another better!"

[][][] [][][] [][][]

There was never a Saint Drunk. There are a number of mangas and animes about _Saints_ , but they aren't what _we_ , in the West, would call saints. In them, "Saint" just means someone who should, perhaps, be given "revered respect".

In the manga, St. Hebereke was translated into English as St. Bacchus and I made full use of it in setting out the Kuno family's motivations. I feel justified because of what the translators did with the name of Happosai's school. Who doesn't prefer _Anything-Goes_ to the original _Indiscriminate Grappling_? How many authors have used the "wrong" name as an important element in their stories?


	26. Chapter 28: The Clan Hothouse

An unusual disclaimer: Ranma ½ is a trademark of Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ Communications, and its characters have been borrowed without permission. And _**Son Turned Daughter**_ **was originally written way back in 2002 by the FanFiction author Tangent** , and his characters Megumi, Yasushi and Ayane have, likewise, been borrowed without permission. **Please see the first two chapters of this story under his pen name**. This story is written for non-commercial purposes only.

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Sasuke has a super ninja technique? See the note at the end of this page.

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Kodachi whipped her gymnastics ribbon at Akane!

In an instant, the wet and makeup-ruined Akane decided to take the weapon seriously. "Anything-goes" was the lesson she grew up with - _Anything_ could be turned into a weapon. But more importantly - She was a martial artist, trained to fight! And this was a fight! And not just one set in the present. Her opponent was the one who had ruined her childhood! At six-years-old, the Black Rose had stolen her first kiss!

No, it wasn't her first kiss. Remember, Ranma, her Romeo, had given her first, real kiss! In fact, she could still feel his lips lingering on hers from minutes ago. It was an adult kiss.

And the denial she had hid behind for ten years cracked like a dam. "Kodachi!" she swore. This was it! This was the fight where she would put her childhood behind her!

The yellow ribbon sent gravel and pebbles flying from where it had struck the garden's pathway.

With the side of her platform shoe, Akane kicked those that came near her. She made sure they were headed towards her opponent. It bought her the time to get into the pivot, defend-fight-or-flight, stance. Defend was the true martial artist's first option, for a number of reasons.

The side-ponytailed beauty in a green leotard twirled her ribbon, shielding herself from the shrapnel. "These are your tools? I'll match yours - only mine are of a higher caliber!" her ribbon grabbed stones that lined the pathway one at a time and flicked them at the raggamuffin with long, tangled hair in a red, wrinkled dress.

The stones would have bruised her palms if Akane had not adjusted for them. The other parts of her body could not adjust to the mini-cannonballs as well. But she was able to evade most of them.

She threw one of her stones at a stone headed for her jugular. She, then, threw the other at another coming at another vital spot.

"Let us make the game more interesting, shall we?" Kodachi said, pulling out an Indian club from an azalea bush with her free hand. A push of a button and spikes sprang from inside.

Akane backed up, her eyes darting, always returning to the Black Rose, but looking for a tactic to use against -

All of her power went to the backward kick! Her platform shoe connected solidly with the scaly nose of the monster lunging from the pond!

Kodachi screamed! Then cried, "You horrid, horrid girl! What have you done to Mr. Green Turtle!"

"I defended myself against a crocodile!" The splashed Akane then slammed her _right_ shoe down on its opening jaw. "I _am_ defending myself!"

Just in time, she jumped out of the way of the spiked Indian club. The accordion pleat of her dress gave her just the freedom of movement she had needed.

She immediately grabbed the handle of the club, pulling it from the soft ground by the pond. "I can use this! Teeth against teeth!"

"No! That would be cruelty to animals! He is my pet!" she said, about to throw a second spiked club. Only to drop it.

Instead, she snapped her ribbon out and wrapped it around the first club.

Akane held on. And the ribbon became skewered by the spikes. It became a battle of strengths, each pulling on her end.

Akane was the stronger, with her unusual center of gravity making her practically immovable.

Stubbornly, though, Kodachi wouldn't let go and was pulled closer. And then she smiled.

That smile warned Akane in time! She saved herself once again from Mr. Green Turtle!

The beast chomped down on the ribbon instead of her. The ribbon became ensnarled by its spiky teeth. The crocodile, then, thrashed its jaw about, trying to be rid of it! It tore the ribbon out of the hands of his mistress and the club from its target.

While the animal was attacking itself with the spikes and tying its own mouth closed, the soaking wet, disheveled Akane advanced on the vicious pet owner. Her ruined makeup gave her a weird look.

Kodachi stood her ground, but said, "You disqualify yourself if you do not use tools!"

Akane's hand automatically reached out for a mallet, the largest she could find.

But she didn't pull any out from thin air. "You think I'm going to play _your_ game?! I don't normally use weapons." And Akane drew back her fist. "I prefer unarmed combat!"

The first blow was satisfying. And the second! And…

[] [] []

There were no tall buildings in the Kuno estate; they were all no higher than the fortress walls surrounding it. It would have been easier for Ranma and Shampoo if there had been. They ended up running over acres of rooftops.

But they had the framed map. And both were experienced trackers. "The greenhouse is on the other side of this roof," said the damp pigtailed boy in culotte-shorts and even more badly torn shirt-blouse. He had lost the platform shoes in the hot water.

The similarly dressed Chinese girl took his arm to stop him. She could no longer keep quiet. "Ranma kiss Loud Girl!"

"Her name is Akane, Shampoo. Do you want me to call you, uh, Simple Girl?"

"Simple Girl? That what Ranma think Shampoo is, simple?"

"Hey! I ain't tryin' to insult you! I don't think you're a simpleton - you're not! But the way you talk! It makes you sound simple."

"I talk the way I do because Chinese makes more sense. Japanese is way more complicated than it needs to be!"

"What!? You _can_ speak Japanese?!" And better than he did!

"I am no simpleton. I can speak your language. Great-grandmother taught it to me. But Shampoo stubborn. Shampoo want to think like Shampoo. Think like warrior woman!" Using a language she was not used to required mental energy she could better use in other ways.

"Well, I guess I ain't somebody to knock that. I don't speak Japanese no better than I have to." He frowned as he spoke. He had to guard himself against using Female Language. Japanese was full of gender differences in the oddest places. Shampoo was right; Japanese was complicated. It boasted of being a "devilish language".

"If I speak like this, will you kiss me, too, Ranma?"

"Kiss you!? Don't I have to beat you in combat or something first?!" He would prefer that.

"When I speak like this, I am a different Shampoo." And she moved closer to him. "I am in a distant land with distant rules from my those of my tribe."

"Uh, I don't think you can just go and kiss somebody in Japan." He didn't know. He had kissed Kodachi and Mikado, and, yes, even Akane at school, only because he-and-she _had to_! The closest he, as a she, had come to kissing just because she felt like it was when she had kissed a pig. (Gee, man! Which turned out to be Ryoga! No! Don't think about that, Ranma!)

Wait. When in the middle of combat, she had kissed Shampoo on the nose. She felt it was the right thing-

Ranma turned his head away from lips that were getting too close.

"Shampoo win kiss! Shampoo beat Loud-" She released him. "I shall challenge Akane! The winner-"

He grabbed her and kissed her. It happened again! Again, it seemed the right thing to do!

"Ay, Ranma!" Shampoo said when she had caught her breath. "Shampoo no want think of red hair body, now." She had accepted the truce. The Kiss of Death could wait. It could be annulled if Ranma could defeat her and make her his wife!

"Sorry, Shampoo. If I'm s'pose to feel something special, I didn't."

This hurt her. "Ranma love kiss of Akane!"

"Uh, not really." Their first kiss had been special, but only because everybody was watching them and it was so important to get it right. Lives depended on it! But their second kiss, the one he had given Akane minutes ago, it was _less_ than special. Having returned to being male only minutes before, he was still struggling with the last surges of _the Female Flower of Love_. Half-girl inside, he had discovered how bisexual his female part was: Not very.

But shouldn't the male part of him _like_ kissing a girl. Especially Akane!? She was his best friend! (Ukyo was a guy, so he wouldn't want to kiss him.)

Was it the Warrior's Chastity training? Or (shudder) was he destined for shudou? (Maybe he _would_ want to kiss Ukyo?!)

[] [] []

"Mistress Kodachi!" Sasuke cried, seeing her unconscious and a somewhat bloodied on the ground. There would be bruises.

"Sasuke! Is it safe for I to proceed?!" Kuno asked from a little further back.

"It depends, Master." The small ninja looked at the girl rubbing her hand and standing over his third master. She was a mess. "Is Mistress Kodachi defeated, and are you the one responsible, Miss Akane Tendo?"

"Yes! And it's about time!" Stupid ten-year-long denial! Honestly, what kind of family trait is that!? If she didn't know of her dad's, Kasumi's, and Nabiki's blindspots, she wouldn't be seeing her own.

The man who came up to her bust put himself lower as he adopted the pivot, defend-or-offend posture. "I am terribly sorry, Akane, but I must punish you in the name of the family I serve. I am duty-bound, as it is the way of the ninja!"

Kuno rushed forward and shoved him aside, staring down at his fallen sibling. "Tell me that my eyes do not deceive me, but I perceive that my beloved sister has been vanquished!"

"No, Master Kuno, they do not deceive (yet again). One of the Kuno family's own has been assaulted. By samurai tradition, the perpetrator must be-"

"Akane! My spirited goddess of the moon and tides! To think that the first person to rightfully claim victory over the Black Rose is none other than you! I always knew you were worthy! Indeed, how could it not otherwise be, seeing as how many times you have fought me, the Blue Thunder, to a draw."

"Draw!? I've _always_ beaten you, Senpai Kuno!" Senpai(Upperclassman)? The effect of _the Female Flower of Love_ was wearing off. What kind of girl _was_ she that it made her more blunt and unreserved than she normally was? Shouldn't that be a trait that _the Male Flower of Love_ would bring out? Or was she naturally a battle-ax? Or maybe that was what a real feminist needed to be?!

(The flower had also had her being more conscious of the way she looked. At least, now, she cared less about that. And just in time, too!)

"There is no questioning that there is no tie here," Sasuke said. "Mistress Kodachi will not accept her defeat gracefully."

"A forgiving spirit and recognition of sportsmanship are, indeed, not in my sister's nature." Kuno turned to his manservant. "All the more reason for _you_ not to punish Dear Akane. The Black Rose will want to do the dirty deed herself and would consider it a grave insult if an underling did what she considers her rightful prerogative."

"(Gulp) You are right, Master Kuno." The ninja bowed to Akane. "My sympathies and condolence, Miss Akane Tendo. I shall miss our times together."

"..."our times together"? -You meaning those you peep on me and my family!?"

A groan came below them. Kodachi was reviving. Opening her eyes, she immediately looked for a weapon.

The closest was the wooden sword of her brother.

His honor would not let her touch it.

The girl in the green leotard forced herself to get up into a lady-like sitting position on her knees. She almost touched her head and betray how badly she felt. But the disciple of Nietzsche willed herself to appear strong. What hurt most was the damage she was sure had been done to her beauty.

Akane wished that the Code would allow her to knock her out again while she had the advantage.

"So," she gave her brother and the head of the clan standing over her a steady, if dilated, gaze. "I see that my dishonor has been magnified. Perhaps I should consider seppuku," she said wryly. "I may.

"-After I have reclaimed what honor I can!" She knew just where Sasuke kept his throwing stars. And in a flash, she sent them at Akane!

Akane was pulled away from them and to Kuno's own body. "I will allow none of that, Dear Sister! Akane is now under clan protection! If harm of any kind whatsoever befalls her, I, your chief and priest, shall hold _you_ accountable!"

"And what can you truly do to me? I already said I was ready to commit seppuku," she said, obviously not seriously.

Kuno frowned, unhappy at not being taken seriously, and by one who he, by rights, had power over. But that had always been the case with his twisted sister. If only…. Then he had one of his ideas and smiled. "I shall wed Akane and, thus, demote you in the line of inheritance!"

"What!?" Now _that_ was something Kodachi took seriously!

"What?!" Now that was something Akane _didn't_ want to take seriously!

[] [] []

There below them was the acres, hectares, wide Greenhouse Laboratory, as the map called it. Neither Ranma nor Shampoo had seen many movies or TV shows; they were unfamiliar with the _Mad Scientist_ tropes. They still felt uneasy. Just yesterday, they had been to the _Trade Show of Dangerous and Cursed Plants_. It was probably not the first one that plant collector Kodachi had been to.

Ranma tried to see in past the green slime that had found its way between the metal framework and spread over the glass panes. Some of it had even seeped onto the outside. "Do you want to try a door?"

"Scout first!" the still disappointed and frowning Shampoo answered and leaped. The boy followed.

The lavender-haired girl slipped on the slime. Ranma had to mid-air maneuver towards a section without slime.

It wasn't ordinary algae and the accomplished Chinese martial artist was slid towards one of the large panels of glass on the roof. Getting off the conveyor, she stepped on a part with no green on it.

The glass wasn't glass. It did not break - It gave beneath her! The clear algae let her fall through its sliminess!

"Shampoo!" Ranma cried, diving after her!

The amazon warrior landed on her feet, breaking pots and their plants beneath her slippered feet! As she was dealing with the pain and the task of maintaining her balance, she noticed the juice of at least one of those plants was _very_ acidic. It was already eating away at the table she was on.

"Look out!" Ranma shouted as he tackled her! He saved her just as nearby plants released cactus needles, pepper spray, and mustard gas!

The strong and solidly muscled boy landed for them on an aisle between the tables of plants. For a moment, Shampoo could almost forget she was a warrior; she was more aware of she being a woman and Ranma being, now, a man. Her hand was on the bare skin of his chest as she was held, back and thighs, in his corded arms.

"Don't move, yet!" he told her in his male voice. His eyes and senses were vigilant for any sign of more attacks.

"Shampoo no move," she said as she leaned closer to him. Her training was screaming to be used. But her female instincts didn't want to listen. For far too long they had been neglected! This was her first real contact with a flesh-and-blood member of the opposite sex she was not battling. (Mousse didn't count, of course. Besides, he was the one she was most battling!)

There were no further signs of attack. "No sudden moves," he said, moving to set her on her feet. She was slow in letting go of him. "And no damagin' plants we don't have to."

The girl's hand slid from his manly chest over to his well-used hand. "Ranma and Shampoo together go where?"

Memories of Shampoo the relentless hunter intent on killing him when a girl tried to raise. But they didn't fit with this Shampoo. Her hand in his didn't seem to be leading up to a martial arts technique. Besides, he wasn't a girl now. He had no memories of the amazon wanting to attack _him_. - Unless she was still mad that he hadn't found her kiss special!

He shook his head. He had to think about the danger that was all around. He grasped her hand to better keep it from possibly attacking him. "We find the _Female Flower of Love_ and the _Male Flower of Weakness_."

"The _Male Flower of Weakness_!" Shampoo remembered the effect one had had on Ranma's father. He hadn't wanted to be alone with his wife, but, now, they were on their second honeymoon - in a love motel! "Yes! We must find that."

[] [] []

Kodachi attacked Tatewaki at his weak point: She laughed. As she rose off her knees, she mocked, "You can't marry. Not this girl, or any other." When she had risen to her full height, she looked him straight into his eyes. "Japanese law requires you to be eighteen. You are only a boy of seventeen."

"That's right!" Akane hurried to agree. Before, Kuno had seemed to only want to _date_ her! (Unless that was another of her denials.)

But he was a Kuno, and he did not think like commoners. "Japanese law says that Akane _can_ marry at sixteen. As any girl can. She and I can be _half_ -married, until we can be fully married in a few months!"

" " _Half_ -married"!?" Akane felt sick at the idea.

"But legally-"

"Legal! That's what it needs to be! Sasuke! See that a proper betrothal contract is prepared! Better! There _must_ be one in the Kuno files! After all, Akane won't be the first of the clan's concubines."

"Concubine!" Akane cried.

"Concubine," the Black Rose sneered. But she knew being a 'half-wife' would give her opponent certain rights and duties. Rights and duties that would weaken her own position within the clan. But she smugly doubted the lowly girl would understand that.

Meanwhile, Sasuke was stuck between the fire and the frying pan of two opposing masters. He was only glad his first master wasn't present as well.

[] [] []

Their palms were becoming sweaty, and not in the way Shampoo hoped for. The hot humidity inside the greenhouse was making things uncomfortable.

Something drew Ranma's attention. "What Ranma see?" Shampoo asked, staring. "Is only long table with bonsai trees."

"Have you ever seen small coconut trees? I have." The Headmaster, the father of the Kunos, had one on his head before Ranma had cut it off. Then he went from thinking he was Hawaiian to thinking whatever nationality got into his head for that day. Could these be one of the _Cursed Plants_? Were they what made him 'Hawaiian'?

"Shampoo see big coconut trees." There, further away, was a small grove of the potted palms inside the greenhouse.

"Man, just what the Hawaiian Kuno'd need to decorate with."

"Hawaiian Kuno? Kuno no Japanese?" Wiping the dampness from her forehead with her forearm, the warrior woman realized the heat she felt reminded her of her fits of anger.

"Oh, you haven't met Kuno's dad, yet! He's more nuts than his kids! I think, maybe, these coconuts have something to do with that," he said, looking at the bonsai trees.

Shampoo tied to giggle. She was still looking at the large trees. "Ranma think coconut fall on head of Headmaster?"

"Man! Too many theories about the guy! Enough! We gotta take care of the flowers we came for!"

[] [] [ ]

"About the Kuno files, Master Kuno," Sasuke said to his second-in-priority master, "...they are in as much need of 'repair' as the mechanisms of the Kuno Chateau. Perhaps, if you could-"

"You need not use your time-split technique to search them, Sasuke," his mistress told him.

"As a humble servant, I must do what my masters command of me, even if it means splitting myself to be into two, three, or…" and he groaned with, "or more times at once." He almost let himself cry as he sighed, "I lose height every time I do it." Then, in a barely heard grumble, he said, "Not that my masters give me many chances to regain some of my lost height."

His master suddenly realized the implication of his sister's words. "I think he does, Dear Sister - Sasuke! The nearest camera!"

Now that Akane had heard the talk about a "time-split technique", she was more prepared to see what happened next. Sasuke leaped up into a tree and out of sight and then almost immediately returned. But for a couple of seconds, she saw _two_ of the little ninjas passing each other, briefly merging before continuing in different directions. The time-split technique must be how the ninja was able to do all the many things his masters demanded of him. No wonder they keep him around despite not being the perfect servant he tried to be.

"The camera!" This Sasuke said, presenting Kuno with an old-fashioned, film camera. "I believe the timer was operating properly and the evidence you seek is in one or more of the sequence of film frames."

"You will _not_ use those pictures," the Black Rose warned. "They would dishonor...the Kuno name!"

"Exactly! Letting the world see the ignoble defeat of a Kuno? And by one socially inferior? That would a quite a serious scar on our superior reputation!"

"Hey! I've defeated _you_ too many times to count!" Akane said angrily.

"Please, Miss Akane, do not persist in claiming that!" Sasuke said. "It is only by Master Kuno's generosity and his claiming to have only been tied in your matches that he is able to _not_ treat you as a criminal to the clan. Remember, the Kunos live by traditions before the Rule of Law, where might made right. Tatewaki Kuno should be admired for doing what he can to make the traditions less harsh."

" "Admire, Kuno"?!" she snorted. But she did see there was some truth in what the little ninja said. He had never been as bad as his sister - or his dad!

Kuno, of course, took her saying _Admire, Kuno_ the wrong way. He was filled with pride. "But the clan _will_ have no great loss of face when Akane is married _into_ the clan! She would no longer _be_ an outsider! Her superiority will become part of ours."

"And, then, my vendetta becomes a family affair," Kodachi smiled evilly. ' _Keep your friends close but your enemies closer_.'

Kuno had been right, unlike him, the Black Rose did not have a forgiving spirit and recognition of sportsmanship.

"Hey, wait! I don't want to be a part of this family!"

[] [] []

The greenhouse was _huge_ : acres, hectares, large! And long tables filled with potted plants were everywhere, with only bushes, shrubs, and trees scattered among them along with hydroponic tanks. Finding two small flowers was seeming like a hopeless task. "Maybe we should jump up to those metal beams and joists and get a bird's-eye view," Ranma said.

Shampoo glomped onto his arm. Before he could react, the frowning girl pointed to them. "Is more of slime up there! Is part of guard system!"

"Then _how_ are we gonna find the flowers?!" There were more tables with flowers on them than not.

"Pink and blue." (Her rising anger was beginning to make her question how much she wanted the _Male Flower of Weakness_.)

Ranma nodded. Most of the groups of flowers were basically of the same color. It was going to take sharp, trained senses to pick out two small, odd flowers among the others. But how much time did they have? They couldn't move too quickly without attracting the attacking plants. They may be able to survive a few, but not tablesful at once!

"Shampoo glad Ranma here!" she said, not only clutching his hand, but her other fingers almost digging into his back. "This place remind Shampoo of childhood enemy from village of herbs and flowers." If she were the fearful type, she could be using her dislike as an excuse to cling to this rugged male. But her disliked was out of hatred, and it had her dragging her feet more and more.

At last, she was resisting going any further. The plants were overwhelming her! "Ranma, Shampoo want find door!"

"Door? Where would that…." Ranma was looking to one of the walls and the outside its panels of glass showed. "That's a good idea."

"Ranma go outside?!" Shampoo said, hopefully.

"No. Kodachi probably left the flowers by the door, if she wants to use them soon." And he began looking around for something, anything, different in the greenhouse. "What do you think a plant laboratory looks like?"

"Shampoo no know. But Shampoo know what pharmacy of great-grandmother look like." And she scanned for _the_ sign.

"There!" Smoke rose many yards, meters, away. And where there was smoke, there was fire - _more_ _heat_ to feed her angry associations!

[] [] []

"You have no choice in the matter, Concubine," Kodachi told Akane. " _Traditionally_ ," she said, eyeing her brother, hoping to use this trigger word in her favor, "you are a subject of the Kuno Fiefdom, and therefore must do and give whatever your lord or lady demands of you."

"What!?" Akane cried at the nerve of the Kunos!

"It is true, Miss Akane," Sasuke said. "Traditionally, Japan was totalitarian for a thousand years. The longest in history."

"Well, it ISN'T anymore! And I won't _let it_ be!"

"She is defying you, Lord Kuno," the Black Rose told him.

"As do you, Dear Sister."

"I have not killed her, yet."

"And you _won't!_ " And Akane produced her largest mallet.

"Huh, Miss Akane, I do not think that will be of much use against paralysis powders or poisons."

"May I suggest, ' _The best defense is offense_ '?" Kuno said.

"That would go against the Code! (Stupid Code.)" But it would also go against the ideas behind what made a true martial artist. _That_ was what mattered most to Akane of the Tendo Dojo! Her answer was, ' _A martial artist must be prepared to lay down her life_ '.

"True. But as a samurai lord, I must abide by another Code."

"Which rules that this _peasant_ must be punished for defying her lord and master!" Kodachi pressed her case.

"Master, uh, Mistress, may I report that Miss Akane _is_ of samurai blood," Sasuke said. "And on both sides of her lineage!" He did the best he was allowed to do for her.

"But still of lesser rank!" Kodachi said.

"Not really. Her ancestors ruled the Tendo domain of Yamagata Prefecture."

"But they do not now! _And_ they cannot be recognized because they have renounced the _Traditions_!"

"I thought our family came from the Dewa Province, just north of Yamagata," Akane said. Was the ninja right?

"The addition of the Tendo blood can only make that of the Kuno clan all the purer," its lord and high priest declared. "Sasuke! See that Akane becomes my concubine that she may become my wife!"

"But your ancestors weren't even samurai! They were kuge!" Bureaucrats!

The Tendos weren't the only one with denial as a family trait.

But Sasuke Sarugakure's could tell her, "All the more reason for them to marry into a true samurai bloodline."

[] [] []

Shampoo rushed forward toward the smoke _and the sound of air conditioning!_ Kodachi did not share her brothers need to keep the Kuno estate as authentically antique as he had 'inherited' it.

"Shampoo, no!" Ranma told her.

Fruit dropped and exploded with enough force to rattle tables. Small, round berries were shaken off their bushes and rolled into their path. She slipped on some and fell, squashing them beneath her.

She screamed in pain! "Cold! Cold! Too cold!"

She shoved herself off the floor and tore off her blouse. Beneath her yellow sports bra were stains and some damaged skin. Ranma smelled something that reminded him of menthol, a chemical that triggered the cold nerves.

He helped her up. "Remember: No sudden movements! At least you're not burnin' from something spicy."

"Cold bad enough!" she frowned. But it had cooled her unreasoning anger down.

Ranma had an idea. Picking up a berry, he popped it. He spread its juice around before it could concentrate in one place, and then rubbed his hands over the back of his neck. "They can help you feel more cool," he said. Kodachi had more than just air conditioning to keep herself cool in the humid hothouse. The bushes were near one of the entrance doors, ready for her to use when she came in.

Shampoo didn't want to have anything more to do with the berries. The girl with only a bra on top was walking, carefully, to the air-conditioned laboratory.

It was a large room with no door and no windows except for those facing the inside of the greenhouse. There were, though, open cases along its other walls, filled different plants. And included among them were the pink _Female Flower of Love_ and the blue _Male Flower of Weakness_ in their own small, plastic cases.

Shampoo easily took the _Male Flower's_ , her interest in it renewed.

"We should destroy those flowers," Ranma said. But, berries in hand, he was more interested in the large, ornate and ancient urn hanging by a swing arm over a raised fire pit. The smoke they had seen came from this and another one that looked more like a very old-fashioned furnace. The smoke had been let into the greenhouse to help keep it humid. This part of it must have tropical plants. And those that didn't mind the soot.

Finally, he had to ask, "Why doesn't she use an electric or gas stove?"

"Is for alchemy! Great-grandmother say all ancient recipes use alchemy burner, before modern invention. Must use burner if want recipe made correct!" She wasn't impressed by the other things she saw in the room. To Ranma, it looked like a high school chem lab.

"I guess that makes sense. Okay, let's destroy these plants and- Shampoo!"

She had gone over to a large, ornate and ancient looking book open on a stand. "Is recipe book!"

"We didn't come for that! -Shampoo! It's too big to take with us! Besides, we're bettin' Kodachi doesn't go too crazy when we destroy _just_ _two_ flowers. She _will_ go completely psycho if we take her book!"

"Hmf!" Shampoo turned up her nose too dramatically. "Great-grandmother have many, more big, more old recipe book!"

"Look, I don't like not doin' something about the book, or this greenhouse. But it has to be right by the Code. And Kodachi has to _know_ she is goin' against the Code. She won't admit it, but inside she'll know and that'll keep her from gettin' all righteous and over-the-top."

"Can not threaten if already destroy thing," the warrior woman said it more simply.

[] [] []

"I've had enough of this! I'm going home!" Akane said, storming away. "Try and stop me and I'll beat you all up - Again!"

Again, Sasuke tried to help her as best as he was allowed, "Master Kuno, Miss Ranma Saotome is samurai on her mother's side."

"Ranma?!" Akane cried, stopping in her tracks!

"Ranma Saotome!?" Kodachi cried, her fury doubled!

Tatewaki saw the effect the name had on his sister. _And_ he was still identifying with his role as leader of their clan. "A fine suggestion, Sasuke. If something unfortunate should happen to my goddess of the hunter's moon, Akane, then Ranma, my goddess of Venus, shall be my wife!" he declared.

"Ranma won't agree to marry you either, Kuno!" Akane told him.

"Not even to save your life, Miss Akane?" Sasuke said. "Or revenge if your life _is_ taken?" His real audience wasn't her, but, rather, the eavesdropping Kodachi. His Mistress had to believe that Ranma _would_ , just to take her down lower in clan status. Such was the 'logic' of internal clan politics.

"Ranma _can't_ marry you! She's really a, a, uh…" Dare she say it?!

"-a lesbian! See, Dear Brother? Even the upstart recognizes your threat as empty," Kodachi snorted. She was more practical than her idealistic brother.

"We do not know that of a certainty," he answered. "Once her friend is truly endangered, she may well have a change of heart."

[] [] []

"Ranma! Book of Recipes open to _Womanhood Flower_!" And Shampoo began reading.

Or tried to. "Stupid Japanese! Your writing system is even more complicated than your spoken language! Chinese people know how to read Chinese even when they can't understand each other when they speak!"

Ranma had moved up beside her and did the reading. "It _does_ tell how to use the two flowers!" He shuddered at the idea of being made permanently docile and submissive, only interested in the things a mother would be interested in. - And it worked on _men_ as effectively as it worked on women!

He ripped the page from the book and tore it to little pieces. "There! And even if Kodachi _does_ know how to make the recipe, I read the antidotes! There are three of them!" There was one for each sex but also one for both. But who wants to keep a flower-holder in their hair? "We can go, now.

"Shampoo!?" he frowned at her. She had taken a test tube of some dark, colored chemical and splashed one of the pages of the book with it.

"Is threat! Bad Girl now know Ranma and Shampoo _know about_ book and plants. Bad Girl go too far and Bad Girl loose treasured things."

"A threat, huh? I wonder what other ways I can use keep her under control?" He heard the siren call to heroes. Ever since he had become almost convinced that the _Accursed Training Ground of Jusenkyo_ was there to make better martial artists of those worthy and would punish those who were not, he had been trying to be more of a hero. Or heroine. Girls could be heroes, too, he vowed.

[] [] []

Akane was angry! And not just from what happened between her and ' _her_ Lord and Lady Kunos'. After successfully stomping away from them, she had triggered two booby traps so far. There was the tiger trap that looked like normal ground until she stepped on it and almost fell onto sharp poles yards, meters, below. Clinging to the grass with her fingers, she had kicked off her platform shoes and dug her toes into the damp clay that lined the pit. That left her and her new dress filthy as well as yet more wet and wrinkled after she had already fallen in a vat of hot water and been splashed by a pond's crocodile. Then her dress had been torn by the thorn bushes that attacked her when she broke a tripwire. She had been lucky to escape with only some scratches. Knowing the Black Rose, they could have been poison-tipped!

"Which way is out!?" she cried in frustration. In her anger, she had gotten turned around and lost her way!

"Dearest Akane! It is not safe to be in Kuno Chateau unaccompanied!" Kuno called after her.

Then he screamed as he himself triggered one of its traps! Akane was tempted to not find out what had happened to him. "Idiot," she cursed, turning around.

The kendo master had his bokken but was unable to use it. A bolo had been launched and its cord was wrapped around him and a tree. Instead of a long-winded excuse, as she expected, he said, "I am glad to see that you are unharmed, my Diana of the Night!"

"Unharmed!? Look at what your insane place did to me and my new dress…." then she realized: He hadn't cared about any that! He _didn't_ care! Kuno wasn't interested in her because of her looks - He admired her as _a martial artist!_ This was her weak point, and it reached down into her heart.

[] [] []

How is it possible for Sasuke to do all the things that are expected of him? The time-split technique lets him be in more than one place at the same time. It does not allow him to be _seen_ being in two places; one of his "after images" has to disappear into the other. He can only be seen to be doing things at incredible speed (as in his fetching the camera in this episode) if he had already anticipated the task ahead of time.

This technique requires that energy be whittled away from him. One form is physical and takes away some of his height. Another form is mental and takes away some of his concentration to details. And that means he will never be the perfect servant.


End file.
